Forty-Five Minutes
by CrazyRach
Summary: Piper hates but loves Alex. Alex loves but hates Piper. Prison was the last place where they expected to find each other again. You know the story so far, but only from Piper's point of view. Alex has her own story to tell.
1. Chapter 1

**_Hey people! This is my first OINB fanfic! Im totally obsessed with the show and have like a thousand stories I've written. After reading other fics on here and seeing the trailer for season 3 (which was amazing!) I decided to get writing again. So here we are. This at the moment is a one shot but knowing me I'll probably carry on with it. Enjoy :) _**

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I was leaning against the wall to the kitchen. Women bustled around cleaning up after breakfast, swiftly wiping down counters and cleaning up dishes. The guards were pigging out on leftovers. Everybody else had either left the hall or were finishing up with breakfast before work.

Lucky them.

My stomach ached while I watched one of reds lackeys dump a tonne of toast in the trash. It was tempting just to dive in after it. I hadn't eaten in days. Red saw my helping piper out, my attempt to anyway, as an opportunity to starve me instead. I had to hand it to her. She was ruthless. Reminded me a little of me back in the day. I'd have done the exact same thing to a mule if they went against my orders. Only difference was red gave you a chance to right your fuck up. I just went ahead and ordered the trigger be pulled.

"Hey, what you want stretch? We got work to do here"

I rolls my eyes at Gina and stood straight, "I'm here to see Red"

Gina scoffed, "Yeah? Well she ain't available for talkin'"

"Don't be an ass. We both know she's back there" Gina took a step back when I leant down and I smirked a little, loving the power my height gave me, "So be a good little kitchen slave and go tell her I want to talk"

Gina's eyes glared me back against the wall where I waited for her to shuffle away to find Red. It wouldn't take her long. I could hear the Russian laughing loudly with Miss Claudette out back.

My eyes filtered through the emptying cafeteria as I waited. Over all the lovely ladies Id be spending the next God knows how many years with. From Tastey and Poussey acting like idiots, to the Hispanics bitching about each other, back to the fucked meth heads praising the hick bible bitch for something. I kept coming back to the golden girls though.

They'd all aged inside these walls. They all knew prison life. They'd perfected it like they wrote the book on it. And they all looked so drawn and exhausted from it.

I drummed my fingers along the tattoo covering my right bicep. With the sentence Id received Id probably be watching the ink fade and the skin stretch around it. It scared me knowing Id be waiting a long while to be free again. It depressed me.

I pushed my eyes away from the golden girls and over a couple tables where a flash of blonde caught my eye. My heart jumped when I looked at her. I loved and hated how she could still make it do that. Like it was all just yesterday and no time had passed between us at all. But then that's the thing about piper. She was so inevitable it seemed to change any concept of time completely. A day alone with her felt like years. Ten years away from her had felt like centuries. And still she controlled me the same. Still she made my heart hurt as it beat hungrily for her.

She was sat with her back to me, which I preferred because it meant i could watch without being glared at. She wasn't alone though which meant I had to be subtle still. Opposite piper sat nicky. She was laughing with Big Boo about something. Whatever it was it must've been funny. They were just short of pîssing themselves. I could just imagine the sort of look Piper was given them. Beside Nicky Morello was half leant over the table whispering to Yoga Jones and the nun. Her eyes kept flashing back to Nicky every so often like she was afraid the redhead would notice them talking about her. I rolled my eyes at them and I peeled my attention back to Piper.

I let my eyes rush over her thinned frame. The orange shirt was baggy on her but I could still see the way her bones jutted out a little. It made me wince. Piper had always been small but now Red's punishment had made her look like a little skeleton. I found myself wondering how she'd handled this. I was starving and it'd only been a few days. Piper had been starved for nearly two weeks. And she'd still refused my help when I broke and gave it. It'd been both stupid and admirable. I just hoped now she was eating again she'd be okay. Even if it was a shitty prison excuse of a meal.

"Hey stretch!" I turned quickly when I heard my dumb nickname shouted. I'd seen Piper's back freeze. Seen her head turn a little as if to search me out. I didn't want her glare on me again. It was getting to the point that whenever her blue eyes found mine I felt like crying.

"Stretch! Hurry it up already. I got shit to do today"

God, I wished people would stop calling me that. If trying to be subtle about this talk with red was what I'd been planning this loudmouth bitch pretty much ruined it for me.

I could feel everyone's eyes on me as I stepped into the kitchen. I could just hear what their mumbles said about me behind my back. I ignored them in favour of focusing on dodging Red's girls as they rushed about with trays and sacks of food.

"Always this busy?" I asked Gina as she lead me to Red. She ignored me and cut a glance into the corner of the room.

"Trish! Don't fuck with that!" She left me and rushed off to where the blonde was balancing a couple boxes in her arms.

I let out an annoyed breath and leant back against a fridge. I doubted Red would want me to just walk in. And I doubted Gina wouldn't eat me alive if I tried it. I let her deal with Trish and waited on my own.

I watched the girls as they worked, watched the careful way they cleaned everything, and triple checked after. Like a bunch of ocd nuts. Only I knew it wasn't a mental issue. Well, much. It was a Red thing.

My mind drifted back to Piper again as I waited. Like it usually did when I had time to let myself think. To how she acted around me now, how she seemed to hate me despite everything. Always glaring like she had something to say. She hated me. But like she had a fucking excuse to! She abandoned me! It was only fair I kicked her ass into jail. We both did that shit years ago, we should both pay for it.

I looked down at the ground and sighed. It annoyed me how easily she could change my mood like that. And it annoyed me how I was quick to blame her without blaming myself too. I was like Piper in that way. It looked like we both could hold a grudge. And we both couldn't take the responsibility of our fuck ups.

"Hey, Vause!"

I jumped when Nicky shouted in my ear. She laughed when I smacked her arm and gently peeled my fingers away from her.

"Hey peace sister! I didn't mean to scare you"

I rolled my eyes at her and flicked my glasses up onto my head. I gave her a low smirk, "Like you could scare me"

"Well the three foot jump you just performed kinda says I can.." We shared a laugh and I gave a curt nod before I went back to my relaxed stance against the fridge.

Nicky took up position next to me, tightly crossing her arms and hooking one ankle over the other behind her. I glanced down at her and laughed under my breath

"What's so funny, eh?" She asked peering up at me. I just shrugged.

"Could you look anymore gay?" I teased nudging my elbow against hers.

Nicky just grinned back at me and gave me this look that said she so could. I shrugged. Yeah, she could.

"Trying to get scraps?" She asked nodding her head at the girls binning food.

I ignored how my stomach growled in response to her question and shook my head at her

"I've come with an olive branch"

"Oh that's what that was in your pants. Y'know some of the girls were thinking maybe Bursett had a fellow gender swap pal. Wanna let me in on your junk, Vause?"

I sniffed at her joke and crossed my arms over my chest, eyes glued on Gina as she continued to ignore my presence. She was talking in Trish's ear as the teen crouched by the freezer with a box. It looked like hey we're discussing where to put everything. I ground my teeth together when they looked back at me and Trish smirked.

"Jesus! What's so difficult about moving a box?" I growled impatient. Beside me Nicky chuckled

"Just go through"

I shook my head, "I'm not stupid"

"Could have fooled me," I ignored her. She tapped my arm, "Hey, why you in this mess anyway? I mean, you knew not to help Chapman and still..." She smiled knowingly. Her eyes were trying to glean information from my expression. I kept it blank. I didn't have to answer her. Nicky shook her head and chuckled,

"Boy you two are a pair of tough cookies. But I'll figure it out"

"Figure what out?" I blinked at Morello when she appeared suddenly next to Nicky. Where the heck had she come from?

Nicky beamed at the girl and hung her arm over her shoulder

"The great Vause-Chapman riddle" she announced laughing when I scowled dangerously at her. Morello raised her hands and waved at us to calm down.

"Easy girlies. No need to fight. Alex, Nicky was just kidding. Right, Nick?"

"Oh yeah, I'm kidding. Just like I was kidding this morning when I said you didn't cum too-"

"Nicky!" Morello gasped embarrassed. She swatted Nicky off her when she bent forward and giggled into her neck. Lorna avoided my eyes and went bright red.

I bit my laugh back not wanting to embarrass her further and turned my head back to Gina who stood glaring at me. I glared back.

"How long have you been stood there?" I asked pulling my glasses back on and moving over to her.

"Was it before or after I said cum?" Nicky asked behind me. I heard Morello slap her. Gina ignored them and nodded out back.

"Get a move on, stretch. I got better things to be doing"

"Well we would all be finished by now if you hadn't taken off to help Trish braid her hair"

Gina's stare grew colder. Her shoulders rolled and she planted her feet a little firmer. I wanted to smack myself. Why fight about shit?

"Shit, Vause, got a death wish much?" Nicky asked walking into the next room. Morello gave me a sympathetic smile as she followed Nicky. I let out a short breath.

"I'm sorry, Gina. I'm just pissed off is all"

"Yeah" was all she said as she pointed behind her, "She's waiting for you"

I frowned at her, "Hold on a second. You mean to tell me I could have just walked in?" Gina shrugged, "Why the fuck did you let me stand outside?!"

"It's not my fault you're a dumbass. Now get out of my face before I carve you a new one"

I backed away when she picked up a small knife from the counter. I held my hands up and turned to walk away. I was uneasy letting her have my back but then I knew Gina wasn't stupid. Stabbing an inmate would get her chucked into max. And nobody wanted that. You go insane up there. It was worse than the shu.

I heard Nicky and Morello speaking quickly as I neared the back of the kitchen. Discussing something with Red while Miss Claudette tsked and occasionally laughed over them. I knew they were talking about me to the Russian. I knew they were trying to use their positions as Red's favourites to dig me out of my hole. Problem was those two only dug deeper when you let them have a spade.

I quickened my pace and walked around the security gate to Red's area.

"Speak of the devil! Hey Vause, I was discussing with ma here how you accidentally dropped that cake onto Chapman's table the other day" Nicky nodded at me to go along with it.

I didn't get why she was helping me out. It didn't matter. Red had her eyes glaring darkly at me. Her face twitched with Nicky's lie, like bullshit couldn't smell any more shittier.

I shook my head at Nicky and stared back at Red. I knew with her it was just a waiting game. She had plans for everybody in here. Including me. It was just figuring out what her long game was.

"I think I can take it from here, Nick" I husked giving her a thankful smile.

"But.. Ma, c'mon! She was-"

"Thank you, Nicky. This has been a good catch up but as always mommy has work to do"

Nicky's expression turned serious then. Like she'd heard Red say that many times before with a bad outcome attached. I tried not to let it scare me.

"Ma, seriously! She was just looking out for her friend"

"Nicky.." Red growled in threat. She twisted her neck and gave the girl a dark look.

Morello took the hint and grabbed a fistful of Nicky's shirt and yanked her out of the room. Red glanced back Miss Claudette. The older woman nodded respectfully and walked out wiping her hands on a cloth. I watched them all go before turning back to Red. She didn't say anything. Just watched me while Nicky and and Morello's bickering faded away outside. I smiled nervously at her and fidgeted with my glasses.

"So..."

Red leant back against a counter and continued to stare at me. It made me uncomfortable.

"Look, Red-"

"You know it's been a very long time since a girl decided to go against my orders. Most of the women here know not to fuck with me"

I smirked despite myself, "That's a real shame"

She ignored me and carried on,

"You haven't been here long. I get it. It's all new and scary. If you were black or one of the spanish bitches I'd have had you down the hill already"

I shivered to myself. I didn't doubt what she said.

"But lucky for you you're in the best tribe in this hell hole"

I laughed at her terminology, "You know calling it a tribe doesn't make it sound any less racist"

She tipped her head and nodded, "Maybe. But this is prison, honey, and nobody gives a shit about racism here"

"I'm pretty sure the other tribes would disa-..." I shut up when Red's expression darkened. I took the hint and stayed quiet. Sassing back would only worsen the issue.

"So, Vause, tell me something" I looked up at her and she leant forward from the counter a little, eyes a little softer than before, "Why Chapman?"

How many times had I asked myself that? Why Chapman? Why oh why was it always Piper? I'd spent so long chasing the circle where that girl was concerned and ten years later I was still just as clueless as I had been back when I had her.

Red was watching me think. Watching me chew myself up inside. Her expression morphed into a look of sympathy and she reached out to pat my cheek.

"I know" she sighed standing straight and turning back to the counter to clean her knives.

I frowned at her back,

"You know what?"

"Don't be coy, Vause. I know that lost puppy love look. It doesn't take a genius to know you love the girl. Tell me, was it before or after prison you two broke each other's hearts?"

I didn't say. I couldn't say. It felt like she'd just taken one of those knives and cut me open with it. Suddenly I couldn't breathe right. It just felt like I was choking on the guilt. Broke her heart. I did that. I broke her. And then I threw her in here.

I raised a shaking hand to my face and wiped a thumb under my left eye, surprised with the wetness gathered there. I shouldn't be crying. I shouldn't care. I just.. Shouldn't.

"When will I be allowed to eat again?" I asked diverting her question entirely as I composed myself back to my normal stoic self. Red laughed.

"When you apologise"

"Okay, I'm sorry"

Red shook her head and turned back to face me. She had a large knife in one hand and dish cloth in the other. She kept wiping it over the knife, polishing it clean. She sighed down at her work and held the knife up in her palm

"What is this, Vause?"

I frowned at her, "It's a knife"

"And what do knives do?"

"Cut things..?" Where was she going with this?

"Exactly. Maybe if I cut your brain out and cleaned it you might stop being so stupid"

I rolled my eyes, "Tad dramatic" I muttered.

Red shook her head at me annoyed and turned back to her knives. I watched her work before I asked what she wanted me to do. Red's hands paused a moment before restarting their job.

"There must be something?" I asked taking a step forward, "I heard your back is giving you trouble. I've been told I give the best massages"

"Blondie has already beaten you to fixing that problem"

Red reached into her apron and slammed a bottle of something on the counter. I didn't know what was in it but I recognised Piper's handwriting scribbled messily along the ridged plastic. I wanted to smile. Ten years and still I knew her handwriting. I looked back at Red.

"That's why she's eating again?"

Red nodded, "She's very smart. A bit quick mouthed but smart. I can see why you like her"

I nodded. Piper was stupid but she was brilliant too. Too clever for her own good. But it sounded like she'd impressed the Russian. There was almost a sense of pride in her voice when she'd said piper was smart. Like she saw something in her. It made me wonder how Piper had handled herself when she'd asked red how to redeem herself. Better than me?

"Maybe I can help someplace else then? Do a little community service?" The Russian shook her head and I let out a deep frustrated breath, "C'mon. Red, there's got to be something" I walked up behind her and leant on the counter beside her. I gave her a smile and balanced my chin on my palm.

"Anything?" I asked giving her a hitched smirk only Pennsatuky would have mistaken for anything but seductive.

Red raised an eyebrow at me before brushing me away from her counter so she could clean it.

"You're barking up the wrong tree, kid" she muttered.

"That's a real shame" I stood straight and ran my fingers through my hair, thinking about what I could do. And what I wouldn't do. Surprisingly the list wasn't so long. I was so hungry I'd just thrown sex up for offer.

Red moved around me as I thought, hobbling slightly as she cleaned the room. I tilted my head a little at her feet, smiling when I had an idea.

"Hey boss, Boo wants a word" Red nodded at Gina and wiped her hands dry on her apron.

"Looks like you're starving tonight" she said smiling evilly as she walked past me. I grabbed her arm and pulled her gently back. She looked really mad that I'd touched her but I ignored her threatening scowl and called Gina back.

"I need a chair. Now"

Gina scowled and did that foot planting arm crossing stance again. Her eyes flickered between me and Red before zeroing in on my hand on Red's arm.

"What's going on?" She demanded uncrossing her arms and staring at Red in concern. I laughed at her.

"Don't worry. I'm not going to kill her. She needs a chair so I can give her a massage"

"Massage?" They repeated together. I nodded and smiled down at Red.

"Yeah. A massage. You've been working hard all morning. I bet your feet are killing"

"Boss.." Gina edged nervously towards her but Red waved her away. She seemed to like my idea. Maybe she was relieved for it. Just a few minutes off her feet seemed to make her happy.

I breathed with my own relief when she told Gina to grab her a chair. Looked like I would be eating tonight after all.

"You have five minutes," she threatened pointing her finger at me, "See how good you think you are"

I tipped my head and smirked, "Past customers say it's really good"

"Ha! We'll see"

She sat down when Gina shuffled back in with her chair. I knelt down on the cold floor in front of her and gently placed her left foot on my knee.

"Ready to be amazed?" I asked slipping her plimsoll off. Red didn't say anything. Just gave me an unamused look back.

"Can I ask you something?" I asked as I began kneading my thumbs against her heel. Red nodded at my request and I smiled.

"What's the deal with you and Nicky? I've never seen somebody act like a complete kid around someone like you"

"Someone like me?" Reds eyes met mine and I struggled for a moment to find the right words without pissing her off.

"Domineering.. You know, independent. Shady almost" She chuckled back at me

"She is my daughter" she shrugged.

"Yeah, but not literally" Red let out a long sigh and I wondered if she wish Nicky were her actual daughter, "How did she become your daughter?"

"Why? Are you hoping I might have a vacancy?"

I shook my head at her, "I already had and lost one mom. I don't want to risk it with another one..." I was quiet for a second before I added, "Though I'm sure you're great, I have to decline"

She smiled at me, "I'm sorry" I just shrugged back, "Nicky came to me an addict. She would get into fights during her withdrawals. The women here picked on her a lot. And I pitied her. So I helped her out, kept her clean. End of story"

I glanced up at her guarded expression and I smiled to myself

"I know"

"Know what?" She snapped irritably. I smiled some more and moved my hands up to massage her foot arch.

"You love her"

Red met my eyes and smiled with me. She nodded. She did love Nicky. Like any mother loved their daughter. And it didn't take a genius to know Nicky loved her too.

Red and I continued to exchange questions after that. Where we came from. Our crimes. Our sentences. I learned that she'd wronged some Russian mob wife and got dragged into their criminal lives. Before that she just ran an honest business. I laughed. I couldn't imagine Red as this good wife shop owner she told me she'd been. It just didn't fit in with the hard bitch she was now.

"And what about you, Alex? What were you before all this?"

"An importer"

"No, before that"

"I've been in the game since I was eighteen. There was nothing before the cartel" I stared at the ground as I thought it over. I'd given my life to that asshole Kubra. Literally my entire life. And he'd taken it in such a way I couldn't remember the times before it. It was sort of scary. But it'd been a career. And I'd loved every second of its. Even after Piper.

"And blondie? When did the two of you meet?" I avoided her eyes. It felt like she'd just read my mind.

"I wouldn't say meet. Piper sort of appeared one day"

"Love at first sight?"

"Fuck no!" I laughed lifting her foot down so I could start on the other, "I was in my local bar with some people.. Potential mules" I added when she pursed her lips, "And she came in looking for a waiting job"

"And when you saw her?"

"What?"

"What did you think? Instant reaction" she snapped her fingers at me and I shrugged.

"I thought, fuck she's beautiful. I'd give anything to fuck her"

I didn't tell her what I actually thought. I didn't want her thinking I was soft if I admitted it was love at first sight. I saw piper and knew immediately I had to have her. Without even speaking to her I knew she was everything I'd been missing. I knew I'd love her one day. Somehow I'd been caught on day one.

Red laughed to herself when I zoned out and she knocked my leg with her foot. I looked up and found amusement in her eyes.

"You are a bad liar" she told me leaning back with a content sigh, "but you were right about the massage"

"Glad I exceeded expectation" I muttered frowning down at my hands as they continued to manipulate the soreness from Red's feet.

"I wouldn't go that far"

Another calm quiet settled between us after that. I was thinking about Piper and my life before and after her. I knew I needed to talk to her. I knew the longer we dragged it out the worse it would get. Thing is I was already over it. Yeah a big part of me resented her for just ditching me when I needed her most but at the same time I didn't care about all that. I'd spent a decade without her. Without her smile and her laugh and that God damn condescending voice.

I missed her. It was as simple and as complicated as that.

Before when she left and I ran of distractions I let myself miss everything about her. Until it hurt. When pushing drugs didn't stop me thinking about her I started taking them. And for what, a few hours of peace. God I hated her and I loved her. And I hated it. When she looked my way all I got was a cold wall. No smile. I was ready to apologise but I knew she wasn't. Because she was adamant I'd landed her here. I hoped she never found out I did. I'd felt terrible but it was a shorter sentence. And part of me wanted her to suffer like Id been without her. I wanted her to know I was still here. That I hadn't just vanished like she'd made me to in her head. But how could I make it right? Pretending nothing had happened wouldn't slide. I'd tried it already. Addressing the issue just pissed us both off.

I frowned deeply to myself as I thought over my options. Piper was a runner. And I was a fuck up. Why did the universe keep fucking sticking us together?

"You think any harder and your head will implode" Red told me. I looked up at her and smiled despite myself at her closed eyes. Looked like someone could still give a mean massage.

"Maybe I should think harder then. Save you starving me to death" My reply was bitter. Angry. And it wasn't entirely Red's fault.

Red chuckled, "You make it seem like I enjoy doing this"

"Don't you?"

"Only a tiny bit. You need to understand who is in charge here. You can't just do what you want"

"Because that's what you want?" I threw back annoyed. Red opened her eyes and nodded

"Exactly. It's all easy to understand. Black and white"

"I never really liked black and white" I said pretending to look thoughtful, "Last I checked I got pretty fucked over thinking like that"

"Oh no" Red tsked leaning back again, "Everything is better in black and white... And red"

I smiled at her afterthought and decided agreeing with her was better than not agreeing with her. I moved my thumb along the skin rounding her ankle and pressed in a little. I didn't miss the catch of breath or the slight sigh in reaction to it. I rolled my eyes to myself. Red was a little kitten.

"So you never answered my question" Red started sitting up straight in her seat. She looked down at me waiting and I bit my tongue before deciding to let her know. Who cares if she knew? I didn't. I didn't care about much anymore.

"I pretty much dragged Piper into all this. I never intended to. I never intended anything"

"Just to fuck her, yes?" Red's eyes glinted telling me she knew I'd been lying all along. I nodded anyway.

"Yeah. Instead I let myself get involved. Which was pretty stupid considering my previous track record" Red stayed quiet while I continued to work on her feet, "I spoke to Piper that night with one thing in mind, and instead I got all this shit"

"And you regret it" Red nodded, "Understandable"

"No. See that's the thing. I don't regret anything about it. We did so much together. Saw and had some really good times. Even the bad stuff felt good. If I could go back..." I drifted off and let out a deep frustrated breath. I didn't know what I'd do.

Red studied me a moment before she spoke again. She leant forward in her chair and I felt her put her hand on my shoulder. When I looked up she seemed really serious. I swallowed nervous.

"You gotta fix it" she whispered, "Vause, you need to find Chapman and talk to her. Make it right"

"How?" I whispered back

"I don't know, kid. Figure it out. Not many girls in here have what you had. And now you have a chance to get her back? Don't waste it. Something put the two of you together and now something else has brought you back together. Deal with your shit and fix it"

I stared back at her but she wasn't going to explain any further. She took her feet back and stood up. I stood too.

"Thank you for the massage. You will get food later. Enjoy it. You earned it"

I stared after her as she walked out and I smiled to myself when I heard her bark orders out front. I couldn't quite believe it.

"Hey stretch, time to leave. Let's go" I arched an eyebrow at Gina and slowly walked out, purposefully dragging myself just to annoy her.

"What were you even doing in there?" She grunted annoyed, "You were talking for like forty minutes"

I blinked and looked back at her. Seriously? She pointed her thumb behind her at the clock on the wall and I felt my jaw drop a little when I read the time. She was right. Forty five minutes in reds company rubbing her feet. How had her five minutes stretched so far without me realising?

"You taken anything lately?" Gina asked narrowing her eyes at me. I laughed at her

"Only a strong dose of self pity and a few anti depressants. Why? Wanna sell me something?"

In answer she raised her hand and pointed me out of the kitchen. I laughed and walked out, nodding back at Red as I did.

I left the kitchen and walked out of the cafeteria towards the rooms. Passing the recreational room I caught sight of Nicky and Morello all cuddled up watching TV. I couldn't help but picture me and Piper there instead. Could it be that easy?

"Hey! Inmate!" I sighed and turned. It was Luscheck puffing down the corridor. He scowled at me annoyed when he staggered slightly. Like it was my fault he was fat and drunk.

"Yes?" I asked sweetly as he came to a halt beside me. He motioned at me to wait while he panted his breath back and I crossed my arms impatient.

"We need somebody to help lock up the track. So you're up"

"Why couldn't you ask someone outside to help?" I pointed out motioning outside at the other inmates wandering around.

Luscheck frowned out the window a second like he hadn't realised that was the most logical thing to have done. He shuffled on the spot and shrugged at me.

"Because I'm choosing you. Now go"

I scowled and he stuck his thumbs into his belt. An amazing feat really. I felt like making him a medal.

"Do you wanna shot?" I shook my head, "Then go"

I muttered under my breath and reluctantly walked up the hall to go outside. Trudging over the yard to the circle in the field they called a running track. Barely anybody was around but three people were on the track. Watson sprinting circles. Crazy Eyes panting to catch up with someone. And at the front..

"Pipes"

She was bent over a little catching her breath. A light sheen of sweat on her face and a beautiful smile etched across her mouth. My breath caught watching it widen happily. I hadn't seen her smile in so long. At least not genuinely. Not since our trip to London together twelve years ago. We'd had so much fun joking about with the British. That was before everything went bad.

My heart ached a little. It hurt seeing Piper smile. And I didn't know why. But I knew I had to see her smile again. I had to be the one causing it. I had to be the one to hold and touch and love her. Me. And I would. I didn't have the faintest idea how but I was going to try. I couldn't let her walk away a second time. Not to some made up fantasy she had going with her lame boyfriend. We were supposed to be together. The universe knew that. So I had to do it. It was all I had left now and it was the only right thing to do. I had to fix this.

Red was right.

Everything was better in black and white.

...and red.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Well I did say I'd probably be back with this story. Can I just say thanks for the support, and wow! This sucker got more views in ten hours than my most popular story did in a month! Obviously I've been sitting in the wrong fandom! But enough yick yack eh. **_

_**This update was inspired a little by Touch by Shura. An awesome song which I think completely works as a Vauseman track. Give it a blast :)**_

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_My hands were clenched tight in her hair. I was moaning lowly into her mouth, and she swallowed my voice eagerly before I felt her tongue trace my lower lip. I smiled and open my mouth for her, greedily inviting her in so I could feel more of her._

_My hand traced a pattern down from her hair, just touching her skin as it slowly palmed downwards. Her breath caught against my lips when my fingers brushed down her throat and I moved back with a smirk to watch her as it continued down. Pipers eyes turned a darker shade of that blue I loved so much. She bit her lip. Climbed closer on top of my lap. Whispered in my ear to carry on. I bit my smile and tilted my head to kiss her shoulder, letting my hand drop some more._

_Her skin twitched under my touch, her abs flexing deliciously under me. I kept kissing her neck as my fingers drew lines along her waist. Dipping just a little to tease between her shorts and skin while i grazed my teeth across her pulse point._

_Piper shuddered against me. Her hands squeezed my neck. Her fingers bit into my skin making me arch up with her. She gasped into my ear when I repeated the action and I groaned hungrily._

_"Al, cmon" she moaned twisting herself up so my hand fell further into her shorts._

_I chuckled darkly and retracted it, moving it instead to brush her hair back from her face. She knew better than to try controlling my fun. She stared back at me with my game. Impatient yet amused by it._

_Piper tilted her head a little and brushed her mouth against my wrist as it moved away from her. My breath caught at the slow intimacy. I couldn't handle it. It was too much and never enough. Just like piper was._

_She met my eyes again and her smile hitched cockily, telling me it was written all over my face._

_"What?" I asked leaning closer. She kissed me and moved her lips up to my ear._

_"Vause" she whispered huskily, holding me tighter._

_"Yeah?" I smiled stroking her shoulder as my mouth brushed against it._

_"Vause" her voice was louder, more serious._

_I frowned and she carried on saying it. She moved her arm from around my neck and roughly shook my shoulder._

_"Vause... Alex!"_

_I jumped when she shouted in my ear and I leant away to frown at her._

_"What the fuck Piper?!" Only she wasn't there. Where Piper had been sat was just a blank space. And I was alone on the bed. I looked around confused. I heard her voice again, echoing around me from somewhere but I couldn't find her._

_I shook my head and closed my eyes. Where'd piper go?_

"Vause!"

I jumped again and opened my eyes again, panicking a little when I looked around and my room had vanished, replaced by a small white and barren cubicle. My breathing slowed back down when I remembered.

Not home.

_Lichfield._

My head slowly calmed down and my heart soon stopped racing scared. It usually took me a while to re-readjust when I woke up. I'd gotten used to it though. At least I thought I had. So why the sudden dream crash?

I flinched when a hand touched my shoulder and I quickly sat up out of my thoughts. My left side bumped into something warm and I jumped again with a breath of relief when I realised what it was.

Nicky was sat beside me on the mattress with a slight smile to say she knew how I felt.

"Doing okay, Vause?" She asked rubbing my shoulder.

I nodded despite my confusion. I guess.

"Here"

I looked down and took my glasses out of her outstretched hand and put them on. My gaze drifted bored about the small room and I let out a deep breath. This sucked.

Despite knowing it'd all been a dream I couldn't help but look around for piper, or stop myself from hoping she'd drop in any second with a smile. But she never would. She hated me. A hopeless breath left me. I felt miserable about it all.

"Time 's'it?" I asked in a croaky voice. Nicky breathed out a laugh

"You sound creepy. Cmon, dinner time"

I groaned when I stood up after her. My body ached so bad. Like i'd been sleeping on the floor. Nicky patted my back and waited for me to fix my bed before she walked ahead of me out of the cube, stopping by Boo's cube to nab something off the cabinet. She looked around herself as she shoved it down her shirt. I arched a brow at her.

"It's Red's" she muttered. I shrugged and let out a yawn. She chuckled, "Tired, Vause?"

I shrugged. I wasn't tired. Just.. I didn't even know. Nicky must've known because she didn't press me for an actual answer. Maybe she knew I wasn't in the mood for talking.

"So you were sleeping for a while.. Happy dreams?"

Or not.

I looked down at her, "Were you watching me or something?"

"Nah, do I look like the type of gal to do something that creepy?"

"Yes"

She laughed and batted my arm, "Fuck off! Look, I passed your cube earlier.. Figured you'd passed out or something. Told the others to leave you alone for a bit. I uh.. I thought you could do with the rest" she avoided my eyes as she spoke, refusing to see my reaction, " Oh and I caught your Jesus roomey snooping in your stuff. You gotta hide that shit away someplace before they take it to burn in the name of Christ"

I was still studying her as she spoke. I was surprised she'd helped me out like that. I thought everybody here was an asshole but Nicky was different, she actually wanted to be my friend. But even though she was looking out for me she was also shy about it. And i didn't fully get why. Because I was older maybe? Or my history as an importer made me important over her, the ex junkie? I decided to worry about it later. It wasn't harming me having someone watch my back. And god knows you need that in this hellhole.

"Thanks" I husked before I yawned again.

Nicky cracked another smile while I sleepily rubbed my eyes. She gently pulled my hand down and shook her head

"Want people to think you been crying?" I shook my head, I definitely didn't want that. Nicky nodded, "Why you so burned out anyway? I thought your shift got swapped?"

I nodded, "Long talk with mother dearest. It sort of wiped me out" I groaned a little more and stretched my hands out ahead of me. I rolled my neck at the same time with a happy hum when my joints let out a satisfying click. That felt better.

Nicky was frowning in thought when I looked back at her

"What?" I sighed knowing an inquisition was coming.

"Nothing. Cmon, we don't head out now Boo'll catch us with her shit"

"I thought it was Red's shit?"

"It is. I'm just... I'm aqquiring it for her first"

I laughed at her and started briskly walking away. Nicky called after me and jogged to catch up. We walked to the cafeteria and lined up behind the others. They all looked pretty bummed about what was on the menu for today. Personally I didn't care. I'd eat dog shit right now if it meant I got to eat.

"So how's things between you and Chapman now?"

I let out an irritated breath and gave Nicky an uninterested look. I was bored of her guessing game. Nicky simply put her hands up and took a step back, accidentally standing on the foot of the woman behind her. She jumped when boo shouted at her to watch it. I turned my head and laughed under my breath.

"Hey calm down, Boo! There's enough food, alright? No need to growl at me. Jeeze," Nicky turned back to face the front and took the tray I handed out to her, "You'd think they were starving us or something"

She realised what she said a little late and glanced quickly back at me. I shrugged and carried on shuffling in line.

"Hey, reckon your talk with Red sorted things?" Nicky muttered holding her tray out to Norma.

I watched the mute dump a spoonful of pale mash onto Nickys tray and ignored my stomach aching hungrily. I hadn't grabbed myself a tray. I didn't want to embarrass myself if red had been lying about letting me eat.

"Who knows" I muttered back.

"Stretch," I rolled my eyes and glanced sideways at Gina stood beside me with a tray, "Looks like it's your lucky day"

"Hey check it out, Vause! It worked!" Nicky bumped my elbow

I couldn't help grinning as I took the tray off Gina, "Tell Red-"

"I ain't a messenger" she huffed turning away from me to address nicky, "Red wants a word"

"You just said you weren't a messenger" I told her gaining myself a scowl. I let it go and left the line. Behind me the two women were whispering an argument.

"Ah cmon! Can't you tell her I'm eating?" Nicky begged holding her tray up. Gina gave her an unamused look and Nicky sighed before she turned and reluctantly dumped her tray into Boo's ready hands

"Thank you bitch" she grinned walking out of line with Nicky's food. Nicky mumbled under her breath and waved Gina away. She gave me half a shrug as she slumped after her.

I turned myself when they'd gone to examine the room. Where could I sit today? There was a space near Yoga, she was nice. Or by Boo, but she annoyed me to hell with her vulgar dinner talk. My eyes drifted past the black and hispanic tables before settling on an almost deserted one. Piper was sat alone with her back to me again, quietly eating her food and minding her own business. I thought about my dream while I watched her.

"Hey get moving already!" A girl behind me barked. I glared back at her a second and then moved.

I slowly walked my way over to Piper's table, designing my conversation starter as I went. I'd start like nothing was wrong. Let her swing us into it if that's what she wanted. At least that way I'd know if she wanted to talk about it. I had to admit I was both nervous and excited about seeing her. I wanted to tell her about my conversation with Red. I wanted her to know that even a mad Russian lady who'd starved us both thought we should be together. And I wanted to tell her about my dream. I wanted her to know I still wanted her. Needed her. That I still thought about her all the time and I missed her.

I took a deep breath and set my tray down opposite her, sitting down with a slight smile when she looked up at me. She didn't say anything. Didn't need to. Her eyes watching me dully said it all. She didn't want me here. I ignored that though and looked down at my food.

"First I've eaten in a while. I had to rub Red's feet for this" I looked up to make sure she was listening and I smiled when I found she was, "Forty-five minutes!" I added in an unbelieving voice.

Piper looked down at her tray. I could see her struggling to stay calm. Her hands shook a little before she laid them flat on the table. When she looked up again her eyes were dead. Her expression blank.

"Seat's taken" she told me looking down again. I dropped the bullshit act then.

"Cmon, Piper. How long are you gonna do this? We both have to live here. We have to deal with each other"

"No, we don't. I plan on spending my entire sentence avoiding you" she told me coldly. I stared back at her. How could she be like that? Wasn't there any part of her that wanted to be friends?

"Get over it" I snapped annoyed, "We did some illegal shit and we both got caught"

Piper glanced up and glared angrily back at me, "You stole my life," I fell a little slack in my seat. She carried on when she saw my reaction, "You stole my good life that I made after you. Stay the fuck away from me"

I swallowed against the hurt rushing through me. She was right. But we'd had a good life. Surely she knew that. I didn't say anything. Just kept staring back at her in a silent fight over who'd look away first. She wanted it to be me. To prove i felt guilty. But I wasn't going to give it to her. Not this time.

"Pipes-"

"Is there a problem here?" I looked up but Piper didn't. She stared ahead at me while I watched Crazy eyes settle down on the bench beside her. Watched her scooch really close.

"No"

Crazy Eyes turned towards Piper and tucked a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear. I felt a little confused. Not to mention angry. Why was she touching Piper like that? Why was Piper letting her?

"Dandelion? Is she bothering you?"

Dandelion? What the fuck? Something changed in Piper's expression. Her eyes shone suddenly. With an idea. One I knew I wasn't going to like. I tensed a little in my seat waiting for it.

"No" I told her gruffly, "We were just talking" I raised my eyebrows at her, hoping she'd take the hint.

"Yeah" Piper said tilting her head slightly to the side, "She is bothering me"

Crazy eyes turned to me, "Then you're going to have to go because she does not like talking to you. Not one bit"

She lowered her arms and rolled her sleeves up threateningly. I wasn't all that certain I was actually seeing this. Did piper gain a bodyguard overnight? I glanced back at her. She seemed a little relieved and scared by Crazy Eyes' presence. Maybe she didn't want either of us here but at the moment it was pretty obvious she'd take crazy over me. Her satisfied smile said as much. And that hurt. I glanced between them again and gave Piper a questioning look.

"Are you kidding me?" I said to the other woman. Beside her Crazy Eyes lost her patience.

"Move bitch!" Crazy growled rolling her eyes annoyed and she pointing back at Piper, "This here, is my wife so-"

"Your wife?!" I burst staring at Piper at the same time she turned to Crazy Eyes nervous

"Oh no, I'm not your-"

"I will cut you bitch!" Piper and me both jumped when Crazy Eyes lashed out shouting and threw her pie at me. I leapt up when the hot pastry hit my shirt and quickly brushed it off my lap onto the floor. Crazy eyes kept screaming, the entire cafeteria was cheering her on. She looked completely deranged.

Deciding I'd handle Piper some other time, and hopefully alone, I hopped it out of there before the guards could come over and blame me for the fight. I walked quickly to the toilets and grabbed some toilet paper. A couple women were hanging around talking. They snorted into their hands when they saw me and said something in Spanish. I ignored them and lowered my hands to wet the toilet paper in the sink a little and started dabbing it at my shirt. The women kept giggling behind me, saying things about my appearance in Spanish thinking I couldn't understand them. Stupid bitches. I blocked out their petty comments about us simple white folk and concentrated more on cleaning my shirt. I kept racing back to Piper and what just happened. All this new information was colliding with the other thoughts in my head. I mean, since when did she have friends in here? And why did they call her Dandelion and throw pie? What the fuck was that about?

I was so absorbed in thinking about Piper I didn't notice the giggling cut dead behind me. Or catch the girls rush out quickly. I was just too busy scrubbing angrily at my shirt.

"I see you're having fun with my food"

I glanced up and squinted through the pie juice blurring my glasses. I didn't realise how smudged they were before. Somebody approached me and took them off my face a moment before returning them. The world cleared up again and I could see Red standing alone beside the shower stalls smirking. I looked back down at my shirt and continued dabbing at it. The Russian tsked at me.

"You should know better than to rub a stain in. What happened?"

I sighed, "My crazy ex got crazily married to a prison psychopath. Apparently" I mumbled throwing the ball of wet tissue into the sink. I let out a long stressed breath before I pulled my khaki shirt off, swearing loudly when I realised the white tee beneath it was just as stained. Red chuckled.

"It won't come out. We use that canned crap nobody else will buy from wholesales. You'd be lucky if an atomic bomb managed to clean it off"

"Perfect" I threw the shirt down angrily and scowled at the floor.

"Honey, you need to get a grip. No use crying over a food fight"

"Only this wasn't a food fight this was Piper being a bitch. As usual"

Red was quiet a moment before she replied, "You know I can see why you two didn't work out before"

I laughed back at her, "And what the fuck would you know about it? You don't know me or Piper. You're just a jumped up mob mom in a cooking coat"

I instantly regretted what I said. I starting thinking up how to apologise. Somehow I knew a foot rub wouldn't cut it this time. I didn't want to imagine all the things red would do to me. Because I knew starving someone out or feeding them tampon mcmuffins was just the tip of her evil iceberg.

I waited silently for her to speak. I knew anything I said would worsen things so I let her have the floor. I flinched horribly when her hand touched my shoulder and again when it moved to tip my face up. I was shocked when I met her eyes. Red didn't look mad. Didn't look angry. Just amused.

"That might be true, but I still run this place. Manners, Vause"

I nodded and mumbled, "Sorry"

She waved my words away and walked back to the door turning back to tell me to change my shirt before a CO saw me.

"Pornstache especially would love have an excuse to get you to strip"

I cringed and nodded.

She left as silently as she'd come and I stared at the floor thinking my day through. From deciding to make things right with Piper to having pie thrown at me I didn't think I had it in me to handle much more. I just wanted to pass out again.

My eyes moved down to where my shirt lay crumpled on the floor. I sighed and picked it up. I'd have to wear it out of here. Prison rules demanded it. I growled under my breath as I pulled it back on. The back was wet from the damp floor, and the front was covered in dirt and dust. And something that looked horribly like fungus. Looking in the mirror I saw I looked a complete mess. And not just because of the shirt. My eyes looked tired and drawn. A little red even. Even the way I held myself now showed a damaged woman. I barely recognised myself anymore and it scared me. I just looked exhausted now. And broken.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath to pull myself together before I walked out the bathroom.

A few girls hanging around in the corridor outside laughed at me when they saw my shirt. It reminded me of tenth grade when I got picked on for being poor. And that pissed me off. I shot them a dark glare back and they quickly shuffled off. I smiled a little to myself and carried on.

I thought a lot as I walked. About Piper. About crazy eyes. And how the fuck the two became an item in here. I mean, Piper had way more class than that. And what was with her quick denial of being someone's wife? Last I heard she couldn't wait to get married to that jerk boyfriend she had going on the outside. I couldn't help but smile though. I replayed the part before Crazy went crazy. Piper's eyes had flashed with panic at me. Like she worried what I thought about her being married, even in the prison sense. Maybe that meant she still wanted me too. Hell I knew she did. Either she didn't know it herself yet or she was trying to lie herself further into that fantasy life of hers.

My feet carried me to down to the laundry room. I heard holy appraisals as I entered and I cursed my luck. Of course the bible bums would be here when I wanted a little quiet.

"..and I pray that one day all them wrong doers come to their senses and they beg for forgiveness from our holy lord!"

I rolled my eyes at the shouts of amen that followed and quietly snuck around the washers and behind the group of morons to the piles of washing in the corner. I quickly lifted a load of pants and searched through the shirts for a spare.

"And most of all I pray for anybody whoever been touched or brainwashed by them homosexuals. Because they don't know. They don't know every gay out there is a worshipper of the devil. They don't know they are being tempted out of Eden and into the hands of hell. They don't-"

"Give me a break" I muttered as I folded a shirt back to place back on the pile. I honestly didn't get how anybody could believe that rubbish. Especially when it was coming from that bitch.

Pennsatucky kept babbling. Keeping the topic gay just to piss me off. I let her carry on. I had that shit my whole life. One junked up meth head spouting recycled bullshit didn't do anything. And she figured that out when I didn't rise to it.

"And you know who else I pray for?"

"Who?!" Her sheep cried back. I glanced back at them all. Pennsatucky was staring back at me. When she noticed my attention she smirked at me.

"All them whores who play double. Because they are definitely going to burn. All of them! They're all skanks! Just like Chapman"

I felt my hands tighten on my shirt. Felt my blood burn with my anger. But I didn't react to it. Just turned and returned to my pile of shirts while they discussed the eventual downfall of the gay agenda and then the rapture we wouldn't be invited to. Fucking junkies. I forgot how fucking idiotic they were when you gave them something to obsess and complain over. Listening to them I felt like hanging myself with a laundry bag.

"Hey!" I ignored Pennsatucky and grabbed another shirt to try, "Hey you! Hey I'm talking to you! Hey homo!" she called back at me. I turned and pretended to look behind me for somebody else. I gave her a blank look and pointed at myself.

"I'm sorry, are you talking to me?"

She ignored me, "How come your bitch shacked up with a black? You like dating a cheater?" They all laughed and she carried on, "Maybe if she put half as much effort into following the way of our lord she wouldn't be in here, right girls?" They nodded, "So Vause, reckon Satan has a double bed for you both in hell?"

Her eyes gleamed at me waiting for me to snap and go at her. But I refused to rise to it. I wanted to. God knew I wanted to. But I'll be fucked if I got into trouble over a fucking meth freak. So instead of giving her that big punch she needed I grabbed myself a random shirt and slung it over my arm.

"You know," I said as I walked away towards the door, "I really hope so"

I walked out smirking at my win as they raged after me. Pennsatucky's voice riding higher than the others in her rage. I chuckled to myself and walked back to the hall.

"Somebody looks happy. Anybody I know?"

I turned my head at her voice and clocked Nicky leant against the closet door checking her nails. I shook my head at her.

"Just throwing some shit back at the bible monkeys," I peered down at her and noticed she looked worked up, "Are you okay?"

Nicky straightened up and gave me a smile I knew was automatic for her. She told me not to worry about it and nodded up the hall in a silent question of walking back to our rooms. I bunched the spare shirt up under my arm to hide it while I walked. Nicky burst out laughing when she noticed my filthy one.

"The fuck happened to you?"

"You know how when you're five and you don't get what you want so you throw a tantrum?" She nodded and I waved down at my shirt, "Basically that"

"Who was it?" she asked grinning to herself. I shrugged back. I didn't want to start trouble for her if she tried talking to Crazy Eyes about proper dining etiquette. Nicky didst push me for a name. Just leant closer.

"Why do you seem to attract trouble?" she asked leaning even closer and sniffing me, "Hmm.. you smell good though"

I laughed and shoved her away from me. Her question bounced around inside my head though. I would love to know the answer to that. I followed Nicky up the hall and into the suburban dorm. Barely anybody was around. Just a few golden girls and Trish and Mercy. I pulled my khaki over my head the second we entered the room and threw it over the cement wall into my cube. Behind me a tap hit the glass of the CO bubble.

"Now what?" I growled turning round to find Fischer waving me over. Nicky smirked.

"Don't count all your chickens. For all you know she might be wanting to see you lose another layer," I raised my eyebrow at her and she shrugged, "What? She's okay"

I narrowed my eyes at her, "Remind me to show Lorna how to fuck you properly. Obviously what she's doing isn't working"

Nicky's smile faltered a moment before it hitched straight up, "Why involve Lorna at all? Lets just cut out the middle woman and-"

I cut her off right there, "Keep dreaming, Kid"

Nicky just chuckled and told me it was my loss before she drifted off towards Trisha's cube. Fischer called me over to the bubble again. I walked over to her, smiling a little when she smiled at me. She seemed like a nice kid. Harmless even. But there was something I recognised about her. It was like I'd seen her somewhere before. I just couldn't figure out where.

"Hi Alex" I blinked at her friendliness, completely unused to it, "Vause" she corrected strengthening her stance suddenly.

I wanted to laugh. She was such a little jobs worth. A little duck trying to swim in a puddle. But she was nice. And that was so rare here. I swallowed my chuckle and instead nodded at her to carry on. She smiled nervous again and brushed her hand down her shirt to smooth any creases in it before she pointed back at my cube,

"I heard what happened in the cafeteria but you cant go around stripping off and throwing clothes. You could hurt somebody"

"By...throwing a shirt...?" Was she being serious? Fischer nodded solemnly back at me, "Okay.. I'll try to hold back the urge to kill somebody with my clothing"

Fischer smiled wide with relief, "Thanks. I don't want you guys getting in trouble over something silly"

"Can't have that" I replied sarcastically with a smile that dropped the second I had my back to her.

I walked over to my cube and dumped myself heavily onto my bed. I groaned when the hard mattress winded me. Could anything else go wrong today?

"So you catch her number for me?"

I raised my hand behind me and raised my finger at Nicky.

"Ouch. Sounds like you got knocked back one. Unlucky, Vause"

"Oh fuck off!" I growled shoving my face into my pillow and clamping my eyes shut.

Nicky's laugh disappeared down the room and I breathed in the silence that followed gratefully. Piper's smile returned to my thoughts as I reviewed my day and I found myself smiling to myself as I drifted off into fantasies of her and me together again. But even though I seemed happy enough with the dreamy ideas popping into my mind I couldn't help but believe things were about to get worse.

The bed shook under me when somebody entered my cube and shook my shoulder hard. I flipped onto my side with an angry shout ready for whoever the fuck was interrupting my life now. My voice died when my eyes settled on Boo and Norma. They didn't say anything. But they didn't need to. Red was summoning me.

"Fuck"


	3. Chapter 3

_**Hey guys and gals :) Thanks for the views/comments/follows/favs etc! So here's the next update! If you haven't figured out yet I'm a total music dork so I'll probably be giving you many tunes to listen to throughout this story. Call it a soundtrack. Today's is; Desire by Years &amp; Years. Listen to it and tell me it doesn't work with Alex and Piper :P**_

**_Just a quick note to avoid confusion, this has a flashback thats been cut up and spliced into present time. It's been italiced though so hopefully it works. I wanted to give Alex's pov its own depth like Piper's has in the show. Whether it worked or not... I'll let you lot decide. Also this chapter is split into three. I wanted to follow the story lines in the show but thats hard getting it all in in one long chapter. Like, really hard. Im trying not to split into multiple chapters here but it looks like i may have to take that road later on. _**

**_ Lemme know how it goes! And _****_don't forget the little review button down there :)_**

* * *

_Piper was stood with her back to me. Body on full bare display. My eyes ran hungry over her skin as the steamy water rolled down it. I started taking my shirt off.._

The water was barely warm. The girl before me hadn't thought about rationing at all. Not that you could blame her. It was first thing in the morning. You'd think there'd be plenty to go round. I shivered a little as the thin stream of water brushed down me. I was staring at the wall, lost inside myself. The room was silent behind me. Nobody came in at five. Nobody was smart enough.

_Piper reached out to change the setting on the shower, slowing the water down some more and widening the spray so all of her got hit. She flicked her hair over one shoulder and let her hand follow the water trickles down her front. I felt a slight moan escape me. God she looked good. I quickly unbuckled my pants and ripped off my underwear, following it off with my glasses. I threw it all uncaring into the hall as I took a few steps over to the bathroom..._

The water slowed to a trickle but I stood there staring at the wall still. I leant forward a little and stood with my shoulder pressed against it. My breaths turned a little ragged. I was thinking about piper. About prison. About how fucked it was I had both to worry about. A tear rolled down my cheek. I raised a hand and touched it. I swallowed.

_I stepped in behind piper, walking around her as she rinsed her hair. I gave her a big smile before I leant down and kissed her. She smiled against my lips and brought her hand down to wrap her arms light round my neck. I pulled her closer so she was pressed right up against me. She moaned at the brushing of our chests and I laughed lowly. The hot water pushed on my back, the spray was just powerful enough to push me gently into her. Like the water wanted it as much as I did. My hand rolled up her slick skin, cupping her breast gently. Piper shivered against me then and licked along my lip before she bit down. I really moaned then..._

I sighed to myself when I heard somebody walk into the bathroom and told myself to get a grip. I turned on the spot and grabbed my towel to wrap around myself. I made sure it was secured right before I walked out. I was so over getting gawped at when it slipped mid walk. Somebody was showering in a stall a few doors down. I let them have their peace. I wasn't in the mood for small talk anyway. I stretched my arms as I walked back to the mirrors. Thankfully my wash bag was where I'd left it. I rooted around for my toothbrush and stared at myself in the mirror as I cleaned my teeth.

_Her hands clenched tight in my hair. Her head was tipped back as she moaned. I savoured the feel of her voice as it vibrated the skin under my tongue. I kissed up her throat while my hand rubbed faster against her. She shook against me. Her body hummed beneath my every touch and I loved every second of it.._

"Hey white girl, you got any spare toothpaste? Mine's out"

I blinked and glanced sideways into the mirror at the black girl stood a sink down. Tastey looked impatiently back and I shook my head at her despite having the toothpaste. She sighed annoyed and walked back out the bathroom muttering loudly about me as she went. I didn't care. Rule one about prison, nothing's free and nobody asks for a favour without coming back for more.

I turned back to the mirror and exhaled a breath before I decided to take advantage of the quiet bathroom and get changed. When I was done I quickly towelled my hair, cursed god for not giving me straighteners, and walked back to my room to dump my wash kit before work. When I got back to my cube though somebody had tacked a note to my pillow. I frowned and set my wash bag on the cabinet. The note was from Red requesting my immediate presence. I looked around myself at the quiet room full of sleeping women. How'd she know I was awake? And who the fuck was spying on me? I screwed the note up and threw it over at my bunkie. I was annoyed by the summons. I didnt care how often or how much i pissed off Red. I wasn't some errand girl.

I quickly brushed my hair and slumped back on my bed waiting for the alarm to go off to wake everyone else up. The clock in the CO bubble read five-fourty. Only twenty minutes. I pulled on my hoody and reached under my bed for my copy of City of Thieves to read while I waited. I got about two chapters in before somebody started moaning in the cube over. I flicked the page annoyed. Why couldn't they do that someplace else? It wasn't like they'd get an audience anywhere else right now.

A few of the other woman started to stir as the two girls got louder. A few groaned at them to shut up. Not that they listened. My bunkie even pulled her pillow over her head to block them out. I laughed to myself and tried to re-emerse myself in my book. But even Benioff couldn't help me block them out. I shut the book and stared off at the floor, thinking so hard about how nice it was having my own space to be quiet back in the day. God I missed that.

_"I think we may be needing new sheets" Piper giggled breaking the sleepy silence around us. I grinned and squeezed her back against me. The duvet moved with her, sprinkling us with a new wave of water. It chilled our skin but neither of us could be bothered to get up and sort the wet bed out._

_"Was totally worth it" I mumbled back softly kissing her shoulder a couple times. She rolled over onto her side and I opened my eyes to find her smiling happily at me. I grinned shyly back and stroked her cheek._

_"I love you" She whispered taking my hand in hers. My breath caught. Just like it always did when she said that to me._

_ I beamed tiredly at her and tilted myself forward so I could kiss her. She smiled under my mouth and reached up to tuck my hair back. I dragged the kiss out a moment before I moved back to my pillow and let my eyes close._

_"I love you too" Piper bit her lip grinning before she touched my face and gently pulled me over to her..._

"Hey, Trish! Put her down before you break something. There's people tryin' to sleep here" Nicky stopped by my bed when she noticed me sat staring into space with a book in my hand, "Hey, you okay there, vause?"

I nodded and slowly turned my attention to her. I held my book up. "Yep, just reading"

"Yeah? Usually you need your nose in the book for you to be reading. Whats going on?" She leant against the cube wall and leant her chin on her palm. I shrugged at her.

"Nothing. Just thinking" I smiled at her but she looked like she didn't buy it.

"Uh huh. Now why does that worry me?"

"Because you're so smart" I joked with a chuckle, "Shouldn't you still be in your room?"

Nicky winked and walked away without answering, leaving me back with my book. I opened up the page again, eyes glancing down at the words but not taking any of them in. I kept seeing piper. And i really wish I didn't. Every other word on the white paper said her name. I closed my eyes repeatedly. Trying hard to erase her out of my head. I forgot how hard that was without Heroin helping me out. It made me itch thinking about it.

I gave up again after a couple more agonising minutes and threw the book down so I could stand up. I pulled my boots on and walked out of my cube and over to Morello's where she and Nicky were sat talking on the bed. I invited myself in and dumped myself down beside them and let out a long breath.

"Book got boring, huh?" Nicky said poking my knee. I nodded and tipped my head back against the wall. I miserably sighed again.

"Yup"

"I know how you're feeling vause but it gets better" Lorna nudged her shoulder against mine with a wide smile, "Promise"

Nicky was giving her a disbelieving look. We both did. She met my eyes and smiled, "Look if things get shit, do what I do. Find some random girl to fuck your mind off things"

Lorna's eyes darkened and she quickly span around to face the other girl. She looked pretty pissed and nicky knew it. I pursed my lips to hold in the laugh as the smaller woman glared at nichols.

"Oh yeah Nicky, because thats your answer to everything!" Morello snapped throwing nickys arm off her. Nicky smirked back at her

"Solved our problem of being bored didn't it, morello?"

" I cant even!" Morello squeaked throwing her hands up

"Guys, I appreciate the advice but seriously..." They both looked back at me and apologised. I nodded at them.

"So hows things with you and Piper?" Morello asked with a conspiring voice that matched her twinkly eyes just right, "Did you two make up yet?"

Nicky prodded her, "Babe! You don't just out and say that kind of shit when the girl is obviously upset. How stupid are you, eh?"

"Im sorry!" morello gasped touching my wrist, "Alex im so sorry! I just thought what with the talk you two had at dinner last night and then the pie incident that maybe-"

The breakfast alarm blared over us and I jumped up relieved. Honestly I didn't know what drove me to visit these two. I guess I just didn't want to be alone with my thoughts. I gave the girls an excuse about needing the toilet and walked back to my cube. My bunkie was already gone. Probably to get some bible bashery in before breakfast. I leant over the wall and picked up my toilet roll. I batted it in my hand as I walked out. Nicky called after me before I left, promising me they'd save me a seat with them at breakfast. I kept walking. I appreciated their help but too much of them got me insane.

I strode casually down the halls in the direction of the bathrooms while everybody else grumpily shuffled ahead of me in hopes of a short wait for the showers. It amused me how stupid they all were. A smart person avoided the lines. The early bird and all.

"Hey! You!" I stopped and turned back to the CO. Bell pointed me over to her and I sighed before walking back on myself. She had a bag in her hand. A netted one like we got for laundry. I groaned internally.

"Here. Take this to laundry with you" she shoved it at my face and I took it off her, "And don't fuck up the washing this time" She walked away leaving me with her shit.

"Bitch" I muttered turning round again, only to find Boo blocking my way.

"Morning there, hot stuff" I gave her a disgusted look back, "I'll take that off you" She reached out for the bag and toilet paper but i pulled them away from her

"Why?"

Boo shifted her weight and smiled at me, "Because you've got an early board meeting with the boss. Chop chop" She pushed past me and I stumbled. Boo grabbed the bag as she shoved me aside. I let her have it. Like I gave a shit if Bell's clothes got washed or not.

I flicked my hair out of my face and stole a quick breath before I hustled it to the kitchens where Red was cooking with the others.

* * *

I leant up against the same fridge as before and gave her a bored look. When she glanced up she didnt react. It was like I was part of the appliances or something.

"What do you want, Red?" I said slowly. She looked up from her pan of eggs and gave me a smirk

"I need you to help us with Mercy's party"

I frowned at her and let my stance relax. Here I'd been expecting something bad and all I was getting was a party invite?

"What party?"

"Leaving party, Stretch" Tricia snapped handing Red a bowl of something she sprinkled in over the eggs, "My Mercy's getting out"

"Well yippee for her. But what the heck has that got to do with me?"

"Tricia here just needs a hand with decoration" Red said stirring, "Prehaps you could live up to your name and help?" She looked up at me with this expression that dared me to say no. I was far from scared by it. Fucking Kubra had a deadlier look, and that was when he was happy with you. I shrugged back at her.

"Maybe I'm busy"

"And maybe you're not" Tricia threatened stepping up to me. She tipped her head up to glare solidy at me. I just smirked back. I fucking loved being this tall. Behind the junkie Red tutted annoyed

"Back off tricia. Vause is allowed to decline. There is no obligation"

"Thank you" I pushed tricia back and moved away from the fridge.

"However..." I stopped and turned back to Red, "That said, I am under no obligation to feed anybody selfish enough not to help out. After all.. we all have to pull our weight"

Tricia started grinning beside Red. I frowned angrily at them both. I realised i couldn't back out. Not without being starved off again. And Red knew that was the perfect card to blackmail me with. I felt mad with her. And myself. Why the fuck did I let myself believe she'd be okay with me now? Because she seemed to be with Piper now? No. Red wasn't that sort of pony. She had too many tricks up her sleeve for that. We all got treated the same here. Unless we were one of her daughters.

Tricia laughed at my reluctance to speak. I felt like decking her.

"Looks like I can count on your help. See you later, Stretch" She turned her back on me and started whispering with Red.

I shook my head at them and left. I forgot breakfast and moved around the long line of impatient woman to find Nicky's table. Maybe I could get her to talk to Red. Tell her to leave me alone. Because honestly, I didn't know how much more pushing around I could take from that Commie bitch before I snapped.

"Hey guys" I grumbled dumping myself on the bench opposite Nicky. She looked up from her conversation with Yoga and frowned

"Whats eating you, stretch?" I glared at her, "Okay..you're not in the mood for playing. Whatsup?"

"Could you talk to Red for me?"

"What about?" she asked narrowing her eyes suspiciously. I shuffled up in my seat a little and leant over the table

"Get her to back off a little? She's driving me nuts with these jobs"

Nicky chuckled, "Hey I don't control what she does"

"You shouldn't have helped newbie" Yoga hushed. I rolled my eyes at them all.

"Because you guys all enjoy watching her starve somebody?"

Nicky took a sip of her water, smirking a little, "Best kind of meal entertainment there is, vause"

I gave her a disgusted look in return for her comment and looked around the room. Morello watched me as she chewed her food. Her eyes gleaming knowingly again.

"Looking for somebody?" she asked me. I shook my head but kept my eyes looking for the orange shirt. The rest of the girls at the table chuckled.

"Hey," Somebody touched my hand to make me look back. It was Nicky, "She's in the room still"

"She not get up today?' Morello asked concerned. I stared at nicky. She smiled back at me

"Nope. Heard her crying last night though. Think things are catching up with her"

"Who could blame her?" The Sister said suddenly beside me, "Poor thing has had a lot to process"

"Yeah..." Nickys eyes tacked mine and she grinned a little, "A lot"

I scowled at her and looked down at my hands on the table. I felt bad. Piper might have been doing okay if I weren't here. We were both causing the other shit. Like normal. I'd talk to her today. I'd try to sort this out. If we could work as friends then this would be easier on everybody. I just had to get her to talk to me first.

I stood up and the others looked up at me surprised. I gave them an excuse about having work and they didn't question it. I could feel Morello and Nicky watching me as I walked up to the door to leave. An arm winded me as it barricaded me back into the room. Pornstache pushed me back into the room.

"Breakfast ain't over yet" He gruffed pushing me back into the room when i tried again to leave, "Get back in there, inmate"

"I have to get to work" i told him, "Bell asked me to sort something out for her before lunch"

"Then you can sort it out after breakfast"

"I dont think she'd like that. i mean, you know how she gets" he nodded and i smiled sweetly at him, "I'd hate for her to get moody about this. She might find out and get you into trouble. She is a senior officer after all"

Pornstache's moustache twitched a little as he mulled it over. Finally he nodded at me.

"She is a bitch when she's moody" he muttered pulling his arm down, "Go"

I quickly moved around him, cringing a little when he twisted in the door way so my body brushed his. His hand skimmed up under my shirt, icy fingers crawling upwards. I jumped relieved when Bennet rounded the corner and called out to Pornstache. I felt a little sick as I walked away. I'd been touched by guys before but that guy... He made my skin crawl.

"You okay there, sweetie?" I looked up and nodded at Bursett, "I saw what he just did. Men. They all pig ignorant"

"Preach" I muttered. She laughed

"You seen Red today?" I frowned at her question and nodded. Bursett looked down at me, "And how did she seem to you?"

"Narcissistic and demonic"

"Oh good, she's in a good mood" Bursett strutted off smiling.

I rolled my eyes. Was everybody in here fucking crazy? My gaze shifted around the hall where I noticed somebody walk up the east wing singing to themselves with a bunch of wire wrapped around their shoulder. Speaking of crazy..

"Hey!" Crazy eyes was working down the hall, buffering the floor. I carefully trod through the clean path she'd made and ignored her scowl as I approached her. I shoved her back hard. She tripped on the buffer lead and hit the floor

"Hey what was that for?!" She cried getting back up. I shoved her again

"For fucking ruining my shirt! I don't know what the fuck is going on with you and Piper but you fucking stay away from me. I mean it" I turned and scraped the bottom of my shoe against the clean floor so it smeared dirt along it, "You missed a spot"

Crazy eyes began talking to herself behind me. She pretty much shouted shit about me and my ruining her floor. I found some satisfaction in that and i used it to push me into walking up the dorms. The girls stayed out of my way as i walked. Either being tall gave me this terrifying power or they all thought they'd get fucked by crazy eyes if they were seen talking to me. Either way it was a win for me. If I seemed intimidating in any way it'd make them all leave me alone. And after all, thats what i wanted.

"Vause!" I stopped dead and swore under my breath, "The fuck you doing in this block? You should be downstairs washing stains out of my shirts. Now go before I get you sent to seg"

I laughed at Bell, "For what? Refusing to do your laundry?"

"For attacking an officer" she snarled slowly. I glared at her and turned back to the halls, "Good girl" she called after me.

The laundry room was noisy with the busy sounds of the machines when I entered. Pennsatucky was already stood up on her table preaching bullshit. I found Bell's bag dumped in the corner and picked it up. One of the girls told me Boo had just thrown it at her head when she walked by. I didn't really expecting any better from Boo. She seemed lazy and annoying like that. She'd do anything to piss of these bible nuts. I untied the bag and started separating Bell's washing into whites and colors, eyes sticking a little to the men's boxers hidden inside a shirt. I picked them up and inspected them. Who the fuck would fuck her?

"I think now is a good time to pray," Pennsatucky called out suddenly, "Considering current company" Her eyes tacked mine and I looked coldly back at her slight smile. She closed her eyes and brought her hands together. Her followers copied her.

"Lord forgive us our sins, and lead us not into temptation. But keep us away from the sins of those we are forced to live with here. Sins like lyin' and cheating. Hurtin'. And sexing with girls..."

Her eyes peered back at me then and I laughed at her. Today would be fucking interesting to say the least.

* * *

I was looking down at the sink as i brushed my teeth. I was so fucking tired. Who knew being stuck with bible heavy meth heads for nine hours would drive you to exhaustion? I'd tried my best to block it out. But that fucking hillbilly knew just how to piss me off. All day it was talks about chapman. Piper this and piper that. It made me think about her. Made me miss her somehow. Made me antsy to get out and speak to her. But then when i tried to sneak out to go talk to her the bitches gave me fucking collection work. I rubbed my eyes. I hated laundry. I just fucking hated it.

I glanced sideways when I saw somebody pass the sinks in a towel. It was habit. Looking up my heart skipped a little. Think of the girl and she fucking appears. She was annoying like that.

Piper stopped for a couple seconds, eyes taking me in while mine did the same. I'd almost forgotten how good she could look. Even with ratty wet hair. Even now as she gave me a stoney look that clearly screamed she was annoyed with my presence. She still looked good. I peeled my eyes up away from her towel and back to the sink again. My skin felt hot as I rinsed my mouth out. I caught her look of disgust before she shook her head to herself and started to walk out. I breathed my anger out quickly. I thought maybe she'd have something to say. Maybe she'd apologise about yesterday. Tell me it was a big mistake and she didn't mean any of it. But she didn't. She was still set on blaming me for everything. And it pissed me off. I was stood here trying to make things better. And she was on a mission to fuck them up. It made me want to stop trying with her.

"I'm in here at 5:00 just about every day. You don't like it, avoid it" Maybe that was petty but hey, she was the one wanting to pretend I wasn't here. I was just trying to help her out a little. To be honest i was helping me too. God knows how many times i could handle seeing her walk around like that.

I turned back to the mirror and wiped my hand over my mouth, trying to stop the smile from coming when I heard her footsteps stop.

"You named me" I paused and turned back to her

"What?" I laughed. Inside I was shitting myself. How did she know? I fixed my eyes on hers. She looked pretty mad but I could tell she was fishing for me to come clean. Typical Piper playing the victim.

"You didn't have to take me down with you" She snarled scowling viciously at me. I was a little surprised. I hadn't seen Piper this pissed ever. I turned my attention off her hypnotising eyes and looked around us to make sure nobody was listening in. If a CO overheard us talking about our shit they could easily track it back to Healy and get us in more trouble.

"Is that what all this is about?" I husked pointing back at myself, "You think I turned you in?"

"You haven't seen me in five years, you had no idea what was going on with me. I am a different person. I was building a life-"

"Oh, well, hurray for you!" I cut over her annoyed. I didn't want to hear all about her precious new life with her dumbass boyfriend. Not when my time without her had been so fucking shit, "It wasn't me, Piper"

"Bullshit! You never ever forgave me for leaving-" I quickly cut her off. I didn't want to talk about that. Talking about it meant reliving it.

"Thirteen people were indicted. We met all of them. We traveled together" I was playing for time now. Saying anything to get her to think it was somebody else. Because if she found out it was me I was fucked. I took a step closer to her and she inched back a little in response. She gave me this 'I know everything' look before she said,

"I know it was you"

"No, it wasn't! And fuck you for thinking it was" I angrily grabbed my bag and moved around her.

"Right.. What did they give you? Time off for every innocent person that you threw under the bus?"

Fuck me she was too fucking smart! I was getting frustrated with her questions. Not because she was asking them but because she was making me feel more and more wound up with the guilt the more she asked. If I couldn't shut her up soon i'd have to leave. It did amuse me though. Her thinking she was the good guy in all of it. Like the little princess who got kidnapped away from mommy and daddy.

I laughed at her and turned round again.

"Innocent? That is fucking hilarious! You carried that bag. No one had a gun to your head. Your fiancé might buy this bullshit, but I know you. _I know you_. And there were no complaints when I took you all over the world, but the second shit got real-"

"You put me in danger!" She cut loudly over me in a steel voice. Some of the girls lining for the showers looked back at us. I smiled at her.

"You loved it!" I chuckled, "You were just this boring little girl from Connecticut, who wanted to feel special and bad-"

"Don't turn this around on me" she warned. I didn't mean to say that. She was anything but boring. So I let it go.

"I didn't name you. And, yeah, maybe I never forgave you for leaving, because you.." My voice broke a little and I felt the hurt sting me again, "Broke my fucking heart"

Piper's eyes dropped their hating fire. She looked shocked and guilty and upset all at once. But I wasn't about to let her apologise when i knew she wouldn't mean it. It was just an act. I knew that because i knew her.

"And maybe I've done a lot of fucked up things in my life, but I've never lied to you" I studied her expression a moment and made to go, "Ever"

Except I never stopped lying to Piper.

She kept staring at me and I couldn't handle it. I walked out before she could say whatever it was she was working herself up for and quickly bustled myself down the hall to the one place i knew would be empty. The chapel. I walked in and shut the door behind myself. I was so angry with everything I was surprised when i didnt just slam it. I turned and stared ahead at the stage. My feet carried me down the centre aisle to the front row seats. I took one and hunched over to hold my head in my hands. This was so fucked up. Everything. It was just a fucking big mess. I felt tears roll down my cheeks but I didnt stop them this time. I let myself cry about it. Maybe it was time I let it all out for once.

"Alex? Is that you?" I sat up straight and snapped my head to the left. The nun was sat in the seat opposite me on the other side of the aisle, a bible open in her hands. I must have walked straight past her. I quickly wiped my eyes and stood up

"Sorry. I-I didn't know I was interrupting"

"Please stay. God doesn't mind a little crying with prayers. In fact I think he's probably used to it" I smiled at her joke and sat back down. She smiled kindly at me, "Is there something wrong?"

I laughed and wiped my eyes dry on my shirt, "I'm in prison. What isn't wrong about that?"

The nun looked thoughtful, "Could be worse"

"How?"

"You could be a nun" I chuckled despite knowing it was rude and nodded at her

"Well that's true"

She smiled kindly back at me and tipped her head a little.

"C'mon, whats eating you?" she asked

"Doing confessions now?"

"Nope. Just curious" I nodded and looked around us quick.

"Between you and me?" She nodded and put her bible down as if to throw god out of the conversation. I leant back and sighed, "I'm not cut for prison life. Everybody here just.. They beat you down. No matter how hard you try to fix things they just throw shit back in your face. And I think I'm getting tired of trying"

The sister was quiet for a moment before she nodded, "Ah, this is about Chapman"

I looked back at her. How did she… Nicky!

"Remind me to shoot that redhead" I groaned annoyed. The sister chuckled

"Relax. Nicky hasn't said a word. But I've seen how you two are. You and Chapman. It doesn't take a genius to know the two of you…" She rolled her hand expecting me to help her avoid saying something so repulsive in the lords house. I smirked.

"Fucked once upon a time?" She nodded despite feeling uncomfortable.

"Exactly. There's something there with you two. Like electricity or fireworks. Now I may just be an old timer, and a nun, but I know love when I see it. You two have chemistry"

"And that's all it is. Chemical" I sighed looking away at the chapel window. I heard the nun get up and then felt her hand pat my shoulder. I looked back at her and tried to smile when her eyes softened down at me

"You'll be fine" she said walking up the aisle to the door, "You just have to follow the rules"

I stared off at the stage again while the door closed again. What she said made me remember.

"That's the problem…" I mumbled to myself, "Rules aren't any fun"


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey Kids! So today's song is: The Fear by Ben Howard. I thought it'd work with this chapter. Enjoy! **

* * *

"Can I go now?" I asked after tacking up the last poorly scribbled sign to the wall. My eyes were hurting from trying to read past the different colors. I swear nobody could spell in this place.

Gina ignored me and continued to struggle with a poster. I let her stretch up awkwardly for a couple more seconds before I rolled my eyes and strode over. I took it off her and tacked it to the wall. Turning back to her I crossed my arms impatient. She crossed her arms too and scowled at me.

"I need you to help with some more stuff. That fucking raid set us back" she huffed squaring her shoulders.

"Well can it wait? I've got to work too, y'know"

Gina exhaled sharply. I could tell she was annoyed. What, did she expect me to hang around all day waiting on her and Tricia just because Red said so? Fuck that to fucking France!

"Well?" I snapped impatiently.

She pointed at the door before she turned back to observe the room. She'd need to get this mostly sorted before Tricia finished work in electrical. I could see her worrying over it. I couldn't blame her. Miss cornrows would probably flip her shit if she saw her party of the century was looking lame. Maybe Red would punish Gina if she didn't get it done on time. Maybe i should volunteer to stay and finish the job...

I left her to it.

I wondered what time it was as i strode out towards the cafeteria. I was hungry but i knew i hadn't been helping Gina long enough for it to be dinner yet. I shouldn't have skipped breakfast again.

I sighed at my growling stomach and decided some fresh air might work. I strode to the yard doors and grabbed a spare coat off the hooks lining the walls. Surprisingly it fit fine. I'd have to sneak it back to the rooms later.

It was cold outside. I forgot how chilly it got up here in the fall. I tucked my hands into my coat pocket and stamped my feet on the frosty concrete to try and warm me up.

My eyes stared longingly at the trees in the distance. Past the security gates and the guards. Out where there were no rules and no fucking crazy people telling me what i could and couldn't do. I wanted to be out there so bad. I tried to imagine what it would feel like. Being able to get up when i wanted. Walk to a cafe. Drink some coffee. Go to a bar and stay up all night dancing. I tried to imagine being out by those trees. Just walking over the fallen leaves while the wind blew my hair. But I couldn't. Litchfield had taken so much of my freedom. I couldn't remember what it was like to have it anymore.

"Remembering what life used to be like?"

Red stepped right next to me in her own coat and a scarf. She looked just as cold as me. Probably more seeing as she'd been in the hot kitchens all day. I shrugged at her question and gave her an easy smirk

"No. I was thinking about how to annoy Tricia later"

Red didn't buy me but i didn't care. She stared out at the fields and trees beside the prison. I thought I saw a look of longing in her eyes.

"It's crazy, isn't it? How close it all is," she sighed and looked back at me sympathetically, "But too far for us to reach"

Okay, I was honestly starting to think she could read minds. I pulled my attention off her and back to the fields. What she said was right. It was all too close. Another torture they gave us here.

Red knocked my arm and nodded her head down the hill, "It's eleven-thirty" She stated simply. I frowned back at her

"So?" Was i supposed to know what she was hinting with this? Red's smile hitched higher

"So any second now your little blonde girlfriend will walk out of electrical" her eyes sparkled a little before she corrected herself, "Sorry. Not girlfriend. The crazy ex. Is she still married?"

I shrugged and tried to keep the anger out of my reply, "The fuck should I know?"

"A little birdie tells me the pair of you were arguing in the bathroom yesterday"

"Yeah? Im hoping the same little birdie also told you to keep out of my life" Red laughed and nudged her elbow against my arm. I glanced back at her

"Nicky and Lorna care about you. Why? I have no fucking idea. But you have your wish, Vause. After Mercy's party, no more favours. Unless its for another foot rub" she started to head down the hill. I watched her go singing under her breath in Russian. I couldn't help but frown after her. What was she playing?

The shed down the hill opened up as I moved my eyes off red's walk and looked around again. Girls started to file slowly out of the small building. Most looked annoyed about something and when Pornstache strode out after them I could guess why. I saw three familiar faces walk out after him and I felt myself shiver when I watched piper lean down by a bench for her hoody.

I watched my breath hang a little silver in the air before I decided to go down there. If Piper didn't want to talk at least Nicky was there. She could help cushion any blows Pipes dealt me. I approached the trio slowly, letting them talk about whatever it was they were talking about. Tricia met my eyes as i neared them but she didnt say anything. Maybe she thought her party room was set. I wouldn't say otherwise. Nicky was busy looking concerned at piper all of a sudden.

"What?" Nicky asked her.

I rolled my eyes. Knowing piper she was probably freaking out about something stupid. I walked up behind them and gave the two girls facing me a grin

"Happy hour. Who's up for margaritas?"

"Last time I drank tequila, I woke up in Weehawken" Tricia told me scuffing her shoe on the pavement. Nicky looked back at her confused.

"Yeah, isn't that where you're from?"

Tricia nodded, "Fucking shit hole"

"Yeah, well, Piper loves tequila" I said eyes trained on her back. I'd hoped it'd get her to say something or unfreeze her enough to turn and glare if she wanted.

Piper did turn but she barely looked at me. In fact I wasn't all that sure she'd noticed I was there. She brushed past me quickly and pretty much ran up the hill.

"What?" I called after her annoyed with her continued avoiding of me, "Afraid I'll tell them the pork chop story?"

She ignored me and kept going. I frowned after her. That was piper's favourite drunk story to tell. She loved making people listen to it. Something was going on with her.

"Yeah, this is fuckin' weird, okay?" I looked back at Nicky and she grinned, "I have a pork chop story, too. You go first"

She and Tricia both looked at me expectantly but I couldn't shake the feeling piper was in trouble. I shrugged at them and told them it'd have to wait.

"Ah c'mon, Vause! Don't leave a sister hanging" Nicky moaned. Tricia laughed beside her.

"Shit, man if anybody's hanging at the end of the day it'll be me. Between the two of you any pork chop story is gonna sound like lame nuts, yo"

Nicky gave her a blank expression before she gave me the puppy eyes, complete with pout. I pretended to look convinced by it and then walked off. She swore after me and I chuckled to myself. She'd get me later.

I shivered inside my coat while I walked back to the main building and I quickly yanked the door open to get inside. It was barely any warmer inside the prison but at least it wasn't windy. I was taking off my coat again when I felt somebody watching me. I turned and clocked crazy eyes shuffling over. I gave her a mean look. I was not in the mood.

"Its okay, I'm not gonna throw pie again. I just wanted you to know…" she tiptoed into my space and stretched up. Her eyes flickered as she stared widely at me, "Dandelion and me?" she slowly shook her head, "She's all... yours..."

She backed off and I let out a relieved breath. That bitch scared the fuck out of me most of the time. Especially when she got all creepy and slow speaking like that. So was that what had piper worried? Crazy eyes? I sighed at myself for letting myself believe it was something serious. I wondered what went on between them.

"Yo, Stretch!" I gave the wall a short scowl before I turned back to Tricia walking through the door, "We got work to do. C'mon"

She bustled past me and swaggered up the hall. I scoffed and slowly followed her back to the rec room. I looked around impressed. I hadn't been gone long but Gina had done a lot. The place looked semi decent somehow. Tricia even looked pleased.

"Here"

She threw a roll of toilet paper at me. I caught it and looked down at it confused.

"What, you wanna TP something?"

Tricia rolled her eyes, "Does this place look like its filled with decs? We gotta use what we got"

"So… You want to tape toilet paper to the walls? How very junior prom" I laughed sarcastically and she glared murder at me.

"Hey! Just fucking do it. Before I send Gina to get Red to settle this"

I smirked. What a little kid. I pulled my glasses off and bopped the paper in my hand as I slowly walked around her. She moved around too, arms crossed and eyes glued to me while I walked to the barred window. I guess I could tie the paper around the bars. Tricia twisted back around to observe the room again when she felt I could work without being threatened. I kept catching her muttering things to Gina. About the girls and party food. I tuned them out and kept working. I kept thinking about how nice it'd be to have Red off my back once this was done. I just had to remind myself, dealing with one dumb teenage junkie was easy. I just had to do this and then I'd have my peace back.

"Yo, go higher with those" Tricia ordered at me. I looked over my shoulder at her. I'd already gone up as high as I could stretch. I gave her an annoyed look.

"Look, I know I'm tall and all, but even I cant reach the ceiling with this shit"

Tricia didn't say anything. Just walked to the table closest to her and kicked a chair over to me. I hesitated a moment. It'd be so tempting to kick it back at her. Instead I gave her a cool look and grabbed the back of the chair, dragging it noisily across the room. Tricia smirked and turned back to her table of posters, only looking up again when some of her friends arrived to help her out. She smiled around at them while they gossiped excitedly about her girlfriend's escape from this dump. I just kept twisting paper through the window bars. They didn't invite me into the conversation. So I stayed out.

"Could you make that look half good?" My hands paused a moment with my anger before I shook my head at Tricia

"Haven't you heard? You can't fix shit"

"This ain't shit, alright? Its gonna be a good party"

I laughed at her and shook my head, "Okay"

She set a step ladder beside me and gestured at me to use it instead of the chair. I gratefully moved over to it and stretched up a little higher. Tricia stood beside me with her hands kept tight under her arms while she watched me. I glanced down at her watching me and quickly noticed her shuffling on the spot. Antsy. Nervous. Anxious as fuck. She scowled when she realised I was studying her.

"What you staring at?" She demanded. I shrugged and turned back to the window

"Sucks, doesn't it?" I peered back at her and nodded at her hands, "The shakes. People never tell you drugs make you tremble so much when you stop taking them"

"I don't know what you're talking about" She mumbled tightening her pose.

"Please, I dealt with junkies everyday for the last ten years. You don't think I don't know the signs of withdrawals when I see them?" Her eyes darted to the floor and she refused to look at me.

"How long's it been? Few days? Hours?" Tricia ignored me. I scoffed at her and tied another piece of toilet paper to the bars.

"Believe me, kid, whatever shit is going on in that blonde head of yours, is not worth rotting in here for"

Tricia was nodding down at the floor like she agreed with me. She looked up and gave me a weak smile before she ordered I carry on already. I was tempted to threaten her with telling Red about her little problem. But then it wasn't my problem. And I didn't want any trouble. I just wanted a quiet life inside this place.

"Place looks like crap" Boo commented loudly while walking up behind Trisha. I hid my laugh and carried on looping toilet paper through the bars on the window.

"We're lucky they're letting us set up at all after the raid" Trisha snapped uncrossing an arm to point past me, "Would you get more over on the left side?"

I glanced at the empty space beside me then down at her, "'Cause that'll really make it more festive?" Boo laughed and I smiled with her, "All we need now is a piñata full of rats"

"You know what, stretch? Your ass just got uninvited. Thanks for the help" I hid my smile at being freed from this crappy job.

"Oh, shit" I sighed hopping down off the ladder, "I just got uninvited to the most depressing party ever. What will I do now to make me not wanna kill myself?" I smirked at Boo pissing herself with laughter and threw the paper at Trisha before I started walking out the room.

"She's kind of right" I heard Boo say smugly while I left. I nodded to myself. Of course Im right.

I stopped by the door and grabbed my new coat off a chair in the corner. I tucked it over my arm and wandered back to my cube to dump it. With another few hours until dinner I decided the best way to ignore the hunger pains was to distract myself with a book. I entered the empty cube and sat down on the bed. I yanked my boots off and reached under the bed for a random book out of the piles I had stashed under it. My fingers caught on a soft spine and I quickly took a guess at its title before I pulled it up. It was a stupid game I played with myself. Somehow it made reading the book more fun.

"_Eragon_... God, why'd my friends send me this?" I flicked the page open and leant back against the wall. I guess I could get lost in dragons and magic for a while.

* * *

"_Wow you have so many books!"_

_I chuckled at her child like smile as she looked around at the shelves, "Jealous?" I asked._

_Piper nodded, "Only a lot! I mean, look!" She rushed to the shelf and ran her hands over the spines, "You've got Grecian, Thomas, Bachelard... Oh!" She pulled a book out and turned to me smiling with it in her hands, "You even have Eragon"_

_"Which I bought before the movie"_

_"Sure, Alex" she placed it gently back in its spot, "Polly won't let me keep too many books. She says she can't handle living with a forest. It makes her feel guilty"_

_I walked up behind her and wrapped my arms around her waist._

_"You can come here and read whenever you want" I whispered kissing her neck_

_"Really?" She asked spinning round with an eager grin_

_"Really" I husked kissing her, "I know the librarian, she won't mind"_

_Piper giggled while I continued to kiss her neck. She pulled her arms up to rest on my shoulders, her fingers playing in my hair._

_"Y'know I think I like that you're a bookworm" she mumbled thoughtfully. I smiled and moved my mouth up a little more._

_"Yeah? And why is that?"_

_"Because I don't have to hide the fact I'm one too" she whispered. I laughed at her and moved back_

_"Piper, it was no secret. You quote fucking books and authors all the time"_

_"Oh... I didn't know I was that obvious" she mumbled self consciously. Her eyes tipped to the ground and she refused to look at me. I rolled my eyes_

_"It's fine. I like that about you"_

_"Really?"_

_I nodded, "Really" I kissed her and pulled my glasses off, "My sexy little bookworm"_

_Piper chuckled and let me kiss her. I leant around her to put my glasses up on the shelf and then I cupped her face and kissed her hard. She gasped under the sudden roughness and leant back. I followed, pinning her to the bookshelf._

_Piper giggled again. Her hands touched mine on her face. Her fingers slipped between mine. I smiled at her. She had no idea how good that felt. How right. It was perfect. We were perfect..._

* * *

"Nobody's perfect Leanne. Maybe none of us will get raptured"

"Nah uh! We follow God. That means we get a ticket! Tucky said so!"

"You don't know that! Surely purely innocent people go first?"

"You sayin' I ain't innocent?"

"Lizzy, you're in jail for assault. You ain't innocent"

I blinked when the continued arguing brought me out of my thoughts. I looked around at the noise and I scowled up at my bunkie's and all the other hillbillies suddenly surrounding me.

"Hey" I told the two sat next to me on the bed, "Get your own bed" They stared blankly back at me and it pissed me off, "Fuck off!"

"Hey do you mind? We're discussinn' here" Leanne scowled pointing at her bible.

"Do I mind?" I glared and shut my book, "Of course I fucking mind! I'm trying to read"

"And we're tryin' to study!"

"For what? The holy fucking SATs?" I spat back. They all frowned and looked around at each other confused. I smacked my book to my head. Why? Just fućking why?

"If you like reading so bad you shod join our study" one of them told me. I glanced back at her

"Yeah," Leanne grinned, "it might help"

"Help me be straight you mean?" They nodded when I snapped and I stood up, "Y'know what? Have your fucking bible study"

"Don't be mad, Vause!" Leanne shouted after me as I walked out the cube, "We could help! God could heal you of your sins!"

"Go fuck yourself!" I called harshly back. A guard barked at me to pipe down. I glared back at him. He could go fuck himself too.

"You got something to say inmate?" he growled crossing his arms threateningly. I didn't say anything. Didn't need to. He got a call on his radio that saved me from shouting something at him.

_"Ryans, we need you in the Ghetto for a contraband search"_

He sighed and quickly shuffled away up the hall. I followed him a moment. I stopped when I heard laughter on the stairs beside me. Poussey was sat joking with Black Cindy. They both hushed up when they saw me. Poussey even looked away nervous. It surprised me. Usually they weren't so timid. Especially not around a white girl like me. Then I remembered the whole Crazy Eyes thing. It impressed me how quick word spread here.

"What you want, whitey?" Cindy asked leaning back on the stairs. I shrugged and carried on walking

"They're doing a sweep in your dorm"

My voice echoed down behind me and I heard the two girls leap up and run down the corridor shouting. I laughed and walked out the block towards the library. I was in the mood for disappearing into a book for a while. Anything to stop me thinking about things.

"Hey girl. What can I offer you from my library of words today?" I arched an eyebrow at Tastey's wide grin when I strode in and walked around her. If winning librarian of the year was on her cards she could fuck off.

"Solitude for one" I mumbled sarcastically back.

I walked around the shelves towards the back where I knew nobody else went. The shelves were full of books on law and justice. Something nobody in this dump understood well. I stopped before the last row of dusty books and looked down at the books beside me. I ran my finger over the different spines before I decided on The Glass Castle by Jeanette Walls. I wasn't so sure reading about escaping a lame life of poverty to runaway to New York would help me out but I was feeling homesick. I could walk my old streets with the story. It was some sort of relief.

I tucked the book under my arm and slipped down past a couple girls to the last lot of shelving. There wasn't a table or even a chair here. I considered going to find one before I chose to just dump myself down. I could kick it old skool for a while. I stripped my sweater off and folded it onto the floor behind me. Then I leant out on my back and raised the book to read above me. I liked reading this way. I felt like a kid. And there was some sort of comfort in sitting inside a world of words and art. The paper smell of the library felt like home. It soothed me in a way.

* * *

"_Hey babe, I got your text. About tonight, I thought maybe you'd want to-" _

_I paused by the door and beamed at piper stretched out on her front reading. She was frowning down at the page with a smile as she read. A pile of books were sat beside her. Read already or waiting to be read, I didn't know. All I did know, that was the cutest fucking thing I'd ever seen. I dropped my bag onto the kitchen counter. The noise made her snap out of her concentration and she looked up._

_"Hey!" she grinned before looking back down at the page. I chuckled and strode over to her_

_"Hey, what're you reading?" I sat down beside her and glanced over her shoulder at the page_

_"Uh…" she dragged her eyes away from the words briefly and i could tell it took a lot for her to do that, "Just some Sara Gruen"_

_I smiled, "Ah, Water For Elephants?"_

_"How'd you know it was that one?" She grinned twisting on her side still reading. I gently took the book from her and glanced down at the page she was on. It didn't surprise me she was only a few chapters from the end. The kid could read._

_"Because its you" I said chuckling as I handed it back. She took it with narrowed eyes and a tight smile_

_"What is that supposed to mean?"_

_"It means you're a hopeless romantic" I leant down to her and kissed her. Piper sighed and pushed me off_

_"Go away, I'm trying to read"_

_I laughed and yanked the book away. I threw it back near the shelf and kissed her again_

_"I wanna know what happens in the end!" she squeaked annoyed while I ignored her and climbed over her. I grinned lowly at her as I lowered my face down to hers._

_"They all die" I whispered kissing her. She smacked my shoulder and gave me an outrageous look_

_"Alex!"_

_I chuckled again, "Spoiler alert!" I sang kissing her neck eagerly. Piper relented with a comment on how annoying I was. I just laughed. _

_God, I loved this little bookworm.._

* * *

I was brought reluctantly out of my happy thoughts with Tastey's cry of disgust in the shelf over, "Wait, shortie, you want a book to read, or a step stool? 'Cause I tell you right now, you ain't steppin' on the Goblet of Fire. Don't be fuckin' with Harry Potter. Now you could step on Ulysses. Everybody says…"

I tuned her out again, sniggering a little when I zoned back in and she finished with "Aint nobody got time for that!" I chuckled to myself and flicked to the next page in my book, allowing myself to become re-immersed inside it. I'd just gotten to the bit where that Dinita kid starts to pick on Janette for being poor. Shit sent me straight back to school and my own problems with that. It had me bitterly remembering being laughed at for my shoes. I frowned at the page and decided to skip on a few chapters. I didn't see it as cheating the book, I'd already read it a hundred times. I settled for reading more on Janette's life in new york with her sister. Nothing to cause flashbacks there.

I jumped suddenly when some dumbass walked around the shelf and kicked my shoulder

"Look at you, you're having a little Barnes &amp; Nobles moment" Nicky chuckled taking a seat beside me. I sat up and put the book down.

"My bunkie is hosting Bible study, which usually I can tune out, but once they started arguing over who gets raptured first, I had to go"

"Yeah" Nicky nodded in sympathy, "I am so getting raptured first. I've technically died on three separate occasions and I've met God" I laughed and she grinned before she tapped my knee, "Dude fucking loves me"

I chuckled again and told her the amusing story of how my college friend thought she'd been visited by an angel before finals. Nicky smiled with my narration and she seemed impressed with its ending. Her smile hitched again before she asked if that was how I knew Piper. I gave her a plain smile back

"Kind of" I teased

"Look, I've been in here almost three years. I thought I saw all the permutations of runcher theater, but you two are in a whole new play. What the fuck went on with you outside?"

"I don't know" I sighed looking down at the floor, "Things… And stuff"

Nicky gave up when I wouldn't give hints and I was grateful for that

"Fine" she said sitting back again, "I'll let my imagination keep running wild"

I smiled at her. I paused when I replayed what she said, "Wait, three years? How much time do you have left?

"Two more" She moped tiredly. I blinked. It wasn't long but at the same time it was too long. I cautiously asked what she'd done. Hopefully with Nicky it wouldn't be touchy about it like most of the women in here were.

"Drugs, basically. What do you have?" She asked curious. I counted it in my head. Too long.

"Counting good time, subtract the three, add the one…. A fuck load" I felt my mood drop and turn sour, "Of shitty shitty, smelly, farting, crazy, stupid fucking bitches. Most of whom fucking hate me"

I sighed down at the floor and ground my fist into the carpet angrily. Nicky was quiet beside me.

"Yo" I glanced back at her and she leant forward to whisper, "Should we plan an escape? " I laughed and she smiled, "Where do you wanna go?"

"I don't even know anymore.I used to.I had grand plans. Now I can't even get past the swirling darkness in my brain long enough to land on anything"

I felt the mask slip then. Felt my voice hitch and the tears creep up on me. And I couldn't fight them off anymore. I raised a hand and wiped my eyes. Nicky just watched on. A little shocked, I think. I couldn't blame her. Its not everyday you watch somebody as cold as me break down.

"Oh, man. I was just starting to like you, gonna go soft on me?" I just sniffed, " Oh, fuck. Come here" I felt nicky's hand gently touch my cheek and I let her guide me down sideways so my head rested on her shoulder. She stroked my hair while I sobbed onto her shirt.

"It'll be okay, 's always hope tomorrow'll be taco night" I smiled with her joke.

"Tomorrow's beef and noodles" Tastey interrupted peeping around the corner with a couple books in her hand. Nicky let out an aggravated breath, annoyed Tastey had ruined her joke.

"Or beef and noodles" She said raising her other hand to pat my shoulder.

I smiled miserably and let her carry on stroking my hair. It felt so weird feeling somebody this close again. The contact of it all felt so surreal. It wasn't even intimate but it felt like it was. I wondered if nicky was feeling this worked up by it too. Her calm breathing indicated no. Maybe because she had lorna for this. It made me tempted to take her advice and find somebody to have this with. I winced at myself when i thought about it. I was mad for it but i only wanted piper for that.

"You know, you still owe me that porkchop story..." I chuckled and shook my head at her. She sighed back at me

"Hey Vause, maybe things'll work out, huh?"

I frowned and sat up straight. I wiped my eyes on my shirt as I looked back at nicky

"What will?"

"You and Piper" I made a face and she laughed, "No, I'm serious. She's a little scatty but give her time. She'll be all over you in no time"

I couldn't help but scoff at her, "You think?" Nicky nodded

"Who wouldn't be, right?"

I ignored her flirty wink, "She hates me Nick. Nothing's going to change that"

"Hates you for what?" Her smile started to grow again and I rolled my eyes. I stretched my hand out and prodded her shoulder

"Nice try"

She shrugged, "Can't blame a girl. But seriously, whats the problem?"

I let out a long breath. I was tired with her game but at the same time I wanted to get it off my chest too. I peered at nicky and tried to weigh out how much i could trust her. Would she blab?

"Piper and me… we have a lot of shit. And thats as far as im going"

"C'mon!" nicky groaned begging for more. I shook my head, "Jesus vause! You're making this real hard"

"Look all you need to know is I fucked up and Piper is still pretty paranoid about it. The kid thinks everybody is out to get her or something. Its like she takes one problem and picks for even more problems in it" Nicky laughed in disbelief, "Seriously, half this shit between us? She's made up in her head. Its like she's surrounded by enemies. Only they're all invisible to the rest of us"

Nicky was silent for a moment, letting what I said sink in. She frowned a little before she spoke up again.

"So she has invisible enemies?"

I nodded, "Exactly" I glanced up through the shelves at the clock around the corner. I pointed at it, "You should probably go. Mercy's leaving party will be starting soon"

Nicky was staring off at the shelf ahead of us, completely lost in thought. I nudged her and she nodded.

"Yeah.." She blinked and climbed to her feet, "You coming?" I shook my head

"I lost my invite"

She frowned at me concerned, "You gonna be alright?"

I chuckled and nodded at her, "I'll be fine. Go on. Go see what my decorating skills are like"

Nicky gave me another concerned look before she met my serious eyes and turned to go. I let out a long breath to calm myself when she disappeared. I hadn't broken down like that in a while. It made me depressed thinking how soft I was getting in here. And I couldn't let it get to me. Weakness was like dope in here. Everybody was looking for it so they could get high burning it down.

"Yo," I looked back at tastey peering back round the shelves again, "You wanna try this one?"

She held a book out so I could read its cover. I shook my head. I was not in the mood for Anne frank right now

"Do I look like I want to read about being stuck inside all day while some assholes try to arrest and kill me?" I snapped at her. Tastey chuckled

"You're right. Is some weak ass shit. But i thought it might stick things into perspective"

I blinked at her, "Perspective?"

"This girl, Anne, she hiding in some house in Amsterdam tryin' to stay alive and shit. All she does in this entire book is moan and complain about shit she cant have anymore. But then when she do get to experience some parts she's all like, hey, its not so bad. Maybe you're like her. Maybe you gotta focus on the good parts of what you have left before you start cryin' over the shit you don't got no more"

I stared at her, not quite believing she could be that allegorical. Tastey was watching me process what she'd just said with a cocky smirk to say she was used to it. I wondered how often she threw the obvious into people's faces like this. And how many of those faces hit her back.

"Thats…" I didn't know what to say at all. Usually something sarcastic? But i had nothing, "That's pretty insightful"

Tastey chuckled and threw me the book. I caught it and she pointed at it with a wide smile, "You wanna read that. Its depressing and shit but its good" She turned on her heel and strutted away singing to herself. I looked down at the book and let my thumbs run over the title lettering. I guess i could give it a go?

* * *

"Yo" I glanced up at tastey and she tapped her watchless wrist impatient, "I need to shut up shop. You booking that out?"

She nodded down at the book i'd been reading. I shook my head. I'd come back to read this. Last thing i needed was my bunkie finding it and calling me out with rants about jews. If she could read that is. And i wasn't all that sure she could. Tastey nodded at the door with my answer. I was still numb from reading for so long all i could do was stare back. She stomped her foot impatient

"Cmon man, i gotta gets to the party"

"Okay okay"

i got up and stretched the ache out of my body. Tastey sighed annoyed behind me. I bent down for my sweater and pulled it on as i walked out of the library. She quickly bustled out behind me. She quickly turned to lock the door, accidentally pushing me to the side as she did, and then she sped off towards the rec room. I rolled my eyes at her. I didn't understand this whole leaving party thing. Maybe I should just swing by and find out? I frowned indecisively at the floor.

Fuck it. I had shit else to do today.


	5. Chapter 5

_**Yo, today's tune is Thief by Imagine Dragons. Now this chapter is a blend of two episodes. It would focus entirely on The Chickening ep but Alex made like one appearance and I am far too lazy to think much of a backstory. But at least its long? :) Enjoy!**_

* * *

"Anyone else feel like sharing today?" Rosa husked at us from the stand, "Anybody?"

I looked around at the others. Most of them had already shared before. In fact only a few of us remained secretive about our addictions. And we still came to these pointless meetings every week. Something to pass the time or a way to feel less lonely? Who knew. Maybe secretly we all just liked sitting through the pain of hearing somebody else's bullshit problems. We had to make ourselves feel better some way, right?

My eyes glanced back over my shoulder at piper sat cross legged on the floor behind us. She'd been keeping an eye on me ever since we hijacked her yoga class. Probably to make sure I didn't take advantage of all those lovely and revealing stretches she was pushing her body into. But even with that threat of having my face kicked in she'd given me I was still stealing a few peeks. I was only human.

Rosa asked again for a speaker. The others shuffled in their seats. My eyes were stuck on piper. She stared coldly back. I needed to talk to her still. But I never got a chance. Every time I tried it always got ruined somehow.

Pipers eyes flicked away and I realised suddenly what I had right here.

She glanced back at me. Her beautiful blue eyes stared ice at me. I did something pretty impulsive and stupid then.

I raised my hand into the air.

"I'll share"

The others whispered as I got up and walked round them to the makeshift podium at the front of the room. Even the yoga enthusiasts were watching on interested. Everybody wanted to know why I was in prison. My story was the one of the most sought after here. Nicky's continued persistence said as much. But fuck if I knew why. Maybe I gave off this super bad girl vibe. Like, don't mess with me or I'll break your legs kinda thing. Or maybe I was one of those people where curiosity weighed out danger when it came to getting to know me.

I glanced back at piper with that thought. It hurt knowing I was right.

Rosa gave me the floor and shuffled off to a seat nearby. I looked around at everybody. I felt a little nervous. My eyes rested on piper again when I stood at the podium. She looked a little intrigued as she stretched back with the rest of the class. Like she wanted to know what I had to say. Like she wanted to know how I finally got caught. She secretly wanted a peek into the life Id had without her. She was just as curious as the rest of them.

I took a deep breath.

"I don't have a great rock-bottom story because my rock bottom is happening right now...Not that you're not all great" I smiled down at the podium and tapped it, "but I guess.. I thought I'd never be here"

Across the room I caught piper scoff to herself. I didn't blame her. I'd always been a little cocky thinking I could avoid arrest. She'd always said as much. I looked around at them all and thought how best to explain myself right

"I thought I was someone who was in control. And I was in control, for a while. When I only dealt heroin. Not even dealt. I mean.." I nudged my glasses a little and smirked proudly, "I was an importer"

Behind us piper and the others were raising their knees to stretch their sides. Her eyes were glued to the floor in front of her feet but I knew she was listening. So I carried on with my story.

"But, yeah, I was going through a break-up, and it was around…" Her face tilted up and her eyes raised. And she looked straight at me. Daring me to tell them our past. I gave it a breath before I let my anger at her direct me,

"Actually, I think it's more accurate to say that I was abandoned" Piper rolled her eyes and hopped up to roll her mat away. I wanted to laugh at her. She couldn't handle the truth could she?

"Heroin was the best girlfriend that I ever had" I continued, speaking a little louder so she'd hear me over Yoga's whispering,

"You know, she always made me feel better, and she was always available," I stared straight at Piper walking around the group. I was hoping she'd get the point of my speech, "But even the best girls will fuck you over, you know?"

"Yeah, you would fucking know, wouldn't you?" She growled walking quickly out of the room.

I rolled my eyes and returned to my seat. I didn't want talk anymore. I'd meant to throw it in her face but like always she hit me back just as quick and twice as hard. I felt bad again.

The other girls were staring between me and the door piper had just stormed out of. They all looked pretty amused. Maybe nicky was right. Maybe we were the best kind of theatre in here.

"Damn" Tricia said, "I thought yoga was supposed to relax you?"

"It was doing a good job until you addicts wandered in!" Yoga snapped back at her. We all turned to her and she let out a deep breath before she calmly directed a new pose at her group.

Rosa called our attention back and my eyes drifted round the fringe of the group as I turned back. They stopped on Nicky. She was still facing the yoga girls, watching Morello intently with angry eyes. I frowned a little and got up from my seat.

I quietly snuck around the group while Rosa lectured them about addictions and stopped quietly behind Nicky. She'd given Lorna another dark look before she'd turned back to give rosa her attention. But even though she was watching the front I could tell she was thinking hard about something.

I looked back at Morello who had the same thing going before I bent down to Nicky's ear.

"What's going on?" I whispered to her.

She shrugged back and nodded out the door. I stepped back and she rose from her seat. We quickly left the room together. Nobody stopped us. Nobody cared.

We'd walked halfway back to the rooms when I realised neither of us had said anything. I peered back at her. She shuffled heavily, stomping her feet a little in her anger. And her eyes glared at the floor.

"Wanna talk about it?" I asked when she continued to walk moodily beside me. She looked up at me with a grumpy expression

"Do you?" I shook my head and she sighed, "Me neither"

We kept walking in silence, having not one word of comfort for the other. I felt sorry for her really. It was clear she was in love with Lorna, and it was clear they'd had a fight. And over Lorna's fiancé no doubt. Poor Nicky stuck in a triangle. I thought about my problem with Piper. It was the same one really. I sympathised with Nicky completely. Shit gets you every time.

"So what do you think about all this WAC stuff?" I asked her hoping to start a conversation. Nicky shrugged back

"Y'know, between people round here destroying chapels, to saying they're seeing chickens everywhere, to saying they want a council.. This place is going to shit"

"It's already shit" I pointed out. Nicky nodded

"Fine. It's going to shitier shit" she huffed before she glanced around her bangs at me, "Y'know your girl's the one whose been starting the trouble?" I gave her an uninterested look despite being intrigued, "Yeah, apparently she's the one who saw the chicken first and now everybody wants to catch it. They think it's magic or something. Even Red's after it"

"Piper saw a chicken so everybody goes insane?"

Nicky nodded, "You gotta fucked kid there, sister"

"No shit. So this WAC stuff-"

"Is Healy's way of fucking with us all again. Ain't nobody gonna listen to us in here. System's fucked" Nicky stopped walking and pointed her thumb down the hall on her left, "Hey, I'm headed this way so…"

I nodded and watched her go. I looked around for a clock when she disappeared down the front hall. It was half eleven. I nodded to myself when i understood. Nicky was checking the visitors window. I felt myself follow her. I was interested to know whether she was meeting somebody, or whether she just liked seeing people from the outside world.

A couple girls were standing around whispering when I walked down the corridor. When they saw me they exchanged this look and quickly walked off. It kept surprising me how quick word travelled. It was like Twitter, the prison edition. In a way it was good. I was building this rep that warned girls off me. But it was bad too. I mean, talk about being a prison outcast.

I looked for Nicky when I got into the visiting hall. It wasn't hard finding her.

She was leant against the window when I walked up behind her. Her eyes set on the corner of the room where two women were sat talking. I didnt recognise the older one but I did know that was piper talking to her. I leant next to nicky and watched them talk. The older woman seemed like she was lecturing the other. Piper looked bored.

"Who's that?" I asked nodding my head at the pair. Nicky looked up at me surprised.

"What, you never met mommy before?" she tipped her head and blew out a deep breath, "Chapman must've never seen you as the 'take home meet the parents' type"

I knocked her arm and she chuckled before she turned back to watch the other visits. I thought she'd be mad I followed her but she seemed cool with me here.

I watched Piper again. So that was her mom? You'd never have guessed. She looked nothing like Piper. Her skin was different. Her hair too. She fucking dressed like she owned the joint. But her eyes… She had Piper's eyes alright. The only difference was this woman looked stern and disapproving. She looked around at everything in disgust. Like it was beneath her to breathe the same air as us criminals. I bet she believed Piper was different from us. I bet she believed her daughter was way better than a state institution. And I bet there was a big part of Piper that thought that too.

"She looks like a bitch, huh" Nicky muttered watching them too. I nodded.

"She is. Y'know when she was little, Piper told her mom she saw her dad cheating on her. And she did nothing about it. She's pretty cold"

Nicky looked surprised. She leant with her back to the window and folded her arms, "Hey I thought you hadn't met her"

I turned to lean next to her, "I haven't but Pipes.. Piper used to tell me stories"

Nicky watched me look back at them a moment. I could feel her observing my reactions as I watched Piper smile at something her mom said. It was hard keeping my own smile off my face.

"Reckon mommy would have approved of you?" I laughed and looked back at her

"Would yours?"

"You kidding me? She'd have loved you!" She grinned at me, "'Hey mom here's Alex, my drug importing girlfriend. We like to shack up on her huge piles of cash and do lines together' Yeah, she'd have definitely pulled the red carpet out for you" I chuckled with her. I knew it was going to be bad when i asked. Still, I appreciated her humour, "Hey maybe she'd whip out the fine china too"

"Now I know you're exaggerating"

Nicky chuckled and turned back to the window. She let out a heavy sigh and leant her head against the glass while she watched Piper talk, "At least she has a mom"

I nodded despite feeling a little hurt. What she said made me miss my mom. My eyes moved back to Piper's table. She was looking moodily at her mom, like she was annoyed by something she'd said. I tried to focus on her lips so I could read what she was saying, but my focus swayed too much to concentrate enough. Nicky bumped my arm,

"They're coming out soon. You sticking around for this?"

I wasn't listening. I was watching Piper and her mom stand up and hug. I was trying to imagine what it would feel like if my mom was still alive and visiting me. I didn't think she'd be happy with me being here. I know she'd call me a stupid ass. She'd rage and then she'd hug me tight with a promise she'd fix all of it. And I'd know it'd be okay. Even a call to my mom right now might help me get through all this.

"Hey" Nicky was poking me again. I shook myself off piper's reluctant hug with her mom and turned back to nicky. Other girls were beginning to walk out the check station door. Piper would be too soon. I stood straight.

"I'll see you later" I mumbled walking off. Nicky didn't stop me. She knew I was thinking again.

The library was my refuge. I hid in the back shelves again with a book propped up on my knees. I was staring at the white pages unseeing. I was so lost in memories of my mom, trying to concentrate on remembering everything. I was focusing on my last conversation with her. I'd been in Paris with Piper at the time and I'd called to check in and ask for advice. She'd been telling me about the stupid dog next door and asking whether I was staying away from creepy men in burettes. The last time I spoke to my mom and it was about creepy French guys. And then a day later..

I stared down at the book in my hands and watched as water splashed down across the middle of the page. It took a couple seconds for me to realise I was crying. I dragged myself out of that hard memory and onto a different one. But it made me cry even more..

* * *

_"Piper, this is Diane. Wonder woman and worlds best mom all wrapped into one"_

_My mom turned from the sink and gently slapped my arm before pulled Piper into a tight hug. Pipes looked a little shocked at me over my moms shoulder. We'd been driving for the best part of three hours and I never said where to. She'd never guessed it was to meet my mom. I just grinned back at her and leant myself back against the kitchen counter. I helped myself to an apple out of the fruit basket while my mother hugged the life out of my girlfriend._

_"So you're the famous Piper I've heard so much about?" Mom stepped back and cupped Piper's face. Piper glanced back at me biting into my apple before she nodded._

_"Heard a lot?" she asked timidly. My mom chuckled._

_"Everything" she replied. And her expression said literally everything. Piper's eyes rushed back to me. I winked at her._

_Mom stepped back and smiled between us. I could tell she liked piper already. She wasn't trying to secretly hint her out the building like she had with Sylvie. I was relieved really. I wanted them to get along. They were the two most important women in my life after all._

_"So, what do I owe this visit?" My mom asked tucking her greying hair back behind her ear. She hooked a thumb at me and smiled at Piper, "This one never visits. Always busy with her work"_

_I rolled my eyes when Piper nodded, "I know your pain" she said giggling when I poked her side._

_My mom grinned at me, "Im just joking, baby. Come here, give your mommy a hug" she stepped forward to me and wrapped her arms around my neck. I smiled and hugged her back tight._

_"She's gorgeous!" she whispered in my ear, "Seriously Alex, gold star for you"_

_I coughed back a laugh, "Thanks mom…" I leant back and looked down at her, "You're shrinking with age" I teased. She smacked my arm again_

_"You're just big. Sometimes I wonder if you have giant blood in you"_

_"Climbed down any beanstalks lately, Al?" Piper asked cutting in on our banter with a laugh._

_I beamed at her teasing and tugged her over to me. I kissed her cheek and grinned some more when she blushed out of embarrassment in front of my mom. I didn't care. Mom didn't either._

_"So tell me, Piper, what's my troublesome daughter said about me?"_

_"Oh, uh... Nothing.. Actually" They both looked back at me confused for my secrecy. I shrugged and wrapped my arms around Piper. She seemed reluctant to get cuddly. Maybe she thought my mom wouldn't appreciate it. Perhaps in her eyes it was disrespectful. It amused me really. Usually I was the one trying to sneak away from her PDA in front of people._

_"I wanted you to make your own opinion" I mumbled kissing her ear. _

_My mom was smiling at us when I moved my eyes back to her. She looked happy seeing I was happy. They started talking about each other. Their lives and the few things they had in common. And of course, Me. I let them. I was enjoying watching them get along. _

_Piper gently brushed me off her after a while and asked where the rest room was. My mom pointed out the room._

_"Want me to show you?" She shook her head at me_

_"I'm sure I can find it"_

_We exchanged a smile and she left the room, looking around herself in wonder as she did. I chuckled and leant back against the counter. Piper would no doubt find my room while she was up there. I bet she'd enjoy herself looking around it and seeing teenage Alex's taste in decor. Yup, she'd be a while._

_I let out a content sigh. I was glad Piper was okay about this. I'd worried she would freak out. We both had parent issues. I hadn't met her family after all. And I was protective of my mom. It wasn't just anybody who got introduced to her. Definitely none of my previous girlfriends had met her. They'd never been good enough. Sylvie had only by accident. Maybe Piper would think I was taking us serious now she'd met my mom. I hoped so. I wanted her to know I was a hundred percent on the wagon here._

_I realised my mom was watching me when I noticed how quiet it was in the kitchen. I glanced back at her and found her smiling warmly at me. I twisted round and rolled my half eaten apple in my hands._

_"What?"_

_"You seem happy" she answered smiling. I simply nodded. I was happy, "She's something, Al"_

_"She is. mom. She's… She's amazing. Y'know? Like.. I don't know. She makes me.. And.." I laughed softy at my inability to word this amazing world I was living in when Piper was around, "Piper's perfect"_

_My mom laughed shaking her head, "Wow. That's got to be the first time you ever got speechless over a girl. She must be the one"_

_"I think she might be" I mumbled staring out the window while I got distracted with my thoughts._

_My mom's laughter cut off and she stared at me. She walked over to me and pressed her palm to my head. I batted her hand down_

_"What're you doing?" I asked when she pinched my wrist_

_"Checking you're not sick" I rolled my eyes, "Alex, you really think-"_

_I nodded to stop her saying it. She grinned at me and bounced excited on the spot. I pursed my lips to hide my smile at her. She was like a kid sometimes. That's what I loved about her. _

_"So you think it might be L-O-V-E?" She asked whispering behind her hand._

_"Shh" I told her listening to the footsteps coming down the stairs. We both knew I loved piper. But Piper didn't know yet. I didn't want her overhearing something that big. _

_My mom mimed zipping her mouth before she pulled me into another big hug. I smiled into her shoulder._

_"Your house is so beautiful" Piper's voice called as she walked down the last step and back into the kitchen. My mom gave me a wink and turned to beam at Piper_

_"Thank you, Piper. We worked hard to get it. Right, Al?"_

_I nodded. Piper's eyes cut back to me, asking secretly how that was. I just nodded. She wanted to know if drug money bought this place. And it had. Years ago when I first started up with Fahri. She looked away again to my mom telling her one of my childhood stories. I let out a groan_

_"Please, mom, not the tricycle story again"_

_"Hey I've waited years for you to bring a girl home. You can bet your life that's the one I'm telling! Now piper, Alex was never the fall and cry kinda girl. She was always very silent.. Brooding almost.. Still is actually"_

_"You don't say" Piper said laughing when I gave her a dangerous smile. My mom laughed too,_

_"See when she was six…" she lead Piper into the lounge and sat her down on the couch where she continued to tell her an outrageously over the top story about me falling off a tric._

_I followed them and I leant against the kitchen door and smiled at them both. They were both laughing. They were both happy. And I was too. For no reason at all I was happy._

_I could get used to this._

* * *

"It's okay" I heard Nicky's voice soft and soothing in my ear. She was sat beside me, letting me cry into her neck. My body shook violently against hers while the memory of my mom played in my mind. I couldn't remember Nicky walking in. I couldn't remember her sitting down and pulling me into her. i just took her comfort and let it strangle the frail hold i had on my emotions. I didn't care about looking weak or pathetic anymore. I just wanted to get it out.

"It's okay, Vause" Nicky was saying stroking my hair, "But you and me, kid, we've got to stop these library river moments. I don't think Tastey's gonna like us getting her books wet"

I chuckled despite myself and she laughed too. She gently bumped her shoulder and I moved back. She tucked my hair behind my ear and wiped her thumb under my eye. She looked sad when she stared back at me. Like it was making her miserable seeing me this way.

"What's going on?" She asked

"Nothing" I mumbled taking my glasses off so I could wipe my sleeve under my eyes. Nicky gave me a mean look and I laughed

"Is that supposed to scare me?"

"Not working?" She said looking disappointed. I shook my head and she sighed, "Seriously vause, tell me what's up. Is it about chapman? You looked pretty worked up watching her-"

"I'm worked up about my mom. Fucking Piper is the least of my problems"

"What's going on with your mom?"

"She's dead. That's what's going on," Nicky's expression fell instantly and she stuttered an apology, "Don't. It was a while ago. Years ago actually"

Nicky looked confused, "Then why-"

"The sudden weeping?"

She nodded and I sighed. I leant back against the book shelf behind us and stared up at the ceiling. I was sad because pipers visit reminded me of what I didn't have anymore. And it made me remember my mom. Not that I'd ever forgotten her, just.. I'd always pushed thoughts of her to one side so I never had to be in this situation. I let her become another thing that couldn't touch me. In a way I'd let her die all over again.

"I just never thought about it. Never let myself grieve I guess.. It's pretty fucking ironic really.. When you think about it" I sniffed on a laugh and glanced back her, "You know my mom died the day Piper left me," Nicky's brows shot up, "Yeah. She was leaving anyway but I got a call from my aunt saying mom was dead and Piper.."

I laughed bitterly,

"Piper just walked out. She must've thought I was trying to trick her into staying with me. I needed a friend. But she left. Left me crying in a hotel room while she jetted back to the States to find herself a douche boyfriend" I mumbled off and scowled at the floor. I was furious all of a sudden. I wanted to hit something. In a way I felt abandoned all over again.

Beside me Nicky was watching me. She didn't say a thing until she reached over and took my clenched fist out of my lap and into her hands. I looked down at her fingers prying mine to uncurl and then up at her when she held my hand. She smiled at me.

"I'll be your friend, Stretch. And not only does being friends with me get you a free ticket onto Red's table but you can't lose me ever. This place is too small" She was trying to make me smile, trying to put that humour of hers to good use. I didn't need it.

I pulled my hand back and got to my feet. Nicky was looking up at me confused. She didn't understand my answer. I didn't want a friend. I didn't want anything anymore. Not even Piper really. I'd decided to drop that want. It ws never going to happen. I'd be better without her anyway. I just wanted to rip this entire chapter out of my life for good and then move on when I got out of here.

"Alex?"

I breathed deeply. A friend would only use me in here. They'd get all they could on me and then turn. And with Nicky being so close to red it only made sense she was a spy. But at the same she seemed to always really mean everything she said. She honestly felt bad for me. She wanted to make it okay. In a way I craved that care. I needed it.

The call for count time rang through the pa speakers. Nicky sighed annoyed. She'd be going back to the room. Back to Piper. With everything I'd told her.

"Okay" I said suddenly. I smiled at her suspicious look and leant my hand down. She took it and I pulled her up. I frowned when she got close enough to me I could smell her. Was that perfume? Where'd she get that? I inhaled again and my confusion deepened. It was familiar to me. I'd definitely smelt it somewhere before.

"Okay...?" Nicky prompted bouncing me off my thoughts

I ignored my curiosity and pulled my glasses out of my hair to put them back on with a smile, "Friends. I could do that. But," I held a finger up serious, "No hair braiding and definitely no fucking sleepovers"

"Bad memories?" She grinned when I nodded, "Okay, fine. I'm bummed about the sleepover part but hey, nobody ever made a promise that held. One day, Vause..." She walked off smirking. I just smiled and followed her.

We parted ways outside the library. Her, left to the rooms. Me, right to the dorms. I looked around me at the bland prison halls and let out a long breath. I was tired being here. So fucking tired. And worse than Id ever been working for Kubra.

I started to walk again, happy thoughts surrounding sleep guiding me back to my bed. I was looking forward to crawling under my thin blanket and pressing reset on this entire day.

I was walking past the phones when I glanced outside the window. A brown blur shot over the gravel by the prison to the grass across the yard. I stopped in my tracks.

Was that... a chicken?

I walked over for a closer look. A chunky bird was stood pecking at the ground. It definitely looked like a chicken. So Nicky was wrong? There actually was a real live chicken running around? Everybody wasn't so crazy?

"Fuck me" I mumbled through a smile. I'd have to tell Nicky tomorrow.

I turned back and started walking again, stopping short again when the yard exit opened up and pornstache strode in holding a girl ahead of him by the back of her coat. He pushed her inside and she stumbled a little making her blonde hair fly across her face. I could see her glaring at the floor when he told her to move it. I felt my heart squeeze.

"Piper"

They both looked up and he shoved her forward again into me. I caught her when she stumbled down. He pointed at me

"Make sure that one gets to her block. Be careful though. She's got a touch of crazy. Don't want her hulking out on you..." His eyes ran over the both of us and I stood taller knowing what he was thinking, "Well, maybe I would. Hey maybe you two should.. Y'know..." He made a scissoring gesture with his hands and smirked. I gave him a solid glare back.

He hooked his thumbs into his belt with a sick smile, "Might calm her down some"

"Mendez! I've been looking everywhere for you! Figs is fucking on the warpath" Caputo walked down the hall and glanced back at me and Piper confused, "What's going on here?"

His eyes cut between me holding Piper and Pornstache's shrug. Knowingly almost. Like he'd had this sort of trouble with the guy before. Pornstache straightened up nodded at us

"Just picked this blonde one off the yard. She was running about like before. And this one was running late for count when we got back inside. They both got a shot"

"But that's not what-" I squeezed Piper's arm to shut her up. A shot was the least of our worries right now.

Caputo nodded and clapped Mendez on the back, "Good man! We have to start getting more strict with these women. Before they think they can walk all over us"

Pornstache scoffed and glanced back at me, "Not in my prison" he smirked when Caputo looked down at his watch and the files in his hand. I inched in front of Piper a little more and gave him a stone cold look back. No way was he intimidating us. Caputo looked up again and sighed

"We need to talk about last weeks security updates. Figs wants to know if they've actually worked yet. Honestly, I don't give a fuck but I can't get the bitch off my ass. I'll see you in my office" Caputo walked off again, completely missing pornstache's stride towards me and Piper.

He leant down slowly and touched Piper's hair with a sick look for me. She cringed away from his touch and he chuckled.

"Feisty one ain't you, chapman? We'll soon knock that out of you. And you.." He leant down to my ear and laughed, "Keep a better eye on your girlfriend. You wouldn't want her to fall and land on my dick. I hear she's good at that" He winked at us and strutted off with a shout for us to move it. I stared after him. Even the guards were following the prison rumours.

I waited for him to disappear before I tipped her face up. I tilted it gently in the light and peered down at her.

"Are you okay?" I asked looking her over. Piper nodded, "He didn't... Did he touch-?"

She shook her head. I breathed with relief and stroked her cheek, "Good. The last thing I need right now is added time for killing a man"

Piper looked up and met my eyes, "You'd do that?"

"Of course"

I smiled at her and then shook myself when I realised what was happening. Those damn innocent eyes. I was letting her in again and I shouldn't be. I took a step back. I needed distance.

"You should probably go. The rooms get counted first"

"I'm not in the rooms anymore"

I blinked surprised, if she wasn't in the rooms why hadn't I seen her in the dorm? Piper read my confusion and smiled a little

"My current address is the ghetto" I couldn't help but laugh. They had her in with all the racist black people? Poor Piper.

"And how's that going?"

"Oh, okay. Between being threatened and sharing a bunk with a possible murderer everything's peachy. I even have a prison nickname now"

I smirked, "What is it?"

"Taylor Swift" I laughed and piper smiled, "really it's an honour. I mean, who wouldn't want to be compared to a pop star?"

"Piper..." We smiled at each other again. I had this mega big urge to reach out and touch her. But I couldn't. Not without letting myself get screwed.

"We should go" I said instead

I edged around her and briskly walked down the hall. She followed and I was about to call her out as a stalker when I remembered the ghetto was this way too. We walked silently. Harmoniously. A miracle if anything. It reminded me of all the times we'd gotten along before. Man they were good times. I glanced back at her despite myself and I quickly looked away when I figured she was thinking. She had that cute confession look going. Like the one she used to have before she told me something bad. I felt my sudden good mood fall and I quickened my pace again. I'd already decided to stop caring. Being near her was messing with my head.

"Alex, can I-"

"No" I lengthened my stride and left her. I didn't want to hear anything else she had to say right now. I was trying to cement her behind a wall. I was trying to seem cold again so she'd leave me alone. Before I did something really stupid.

* * *

The dorm was still pretty empty by the time I'd walked in. The girls always showed up last second. I took up my place outside my cube just as the CO walked past and clicked me in. Another CO followed him three seconds later. He clicked me too and walked over to the other co to tally scores.

My bunkie was swaying a little beside me with a happy smile. I prodded her when she brushed me.

"Don't do that" she mumbled softly. She should have snapped my head off. Instead I got a nice don't? I frowned and poked her hard in the neck. She weakly batted my hand away. I looked down into her eyes and I blinked shocked at how dilated her pupils were.

"Are you high?" I whispered shaking her shoulder. Her head lolled and she nodded with a giggle. I didn't get it. How the fuck had she scored in prison?! I shook her again.

"Inmate! No fighting!" The CO walked over and stared at us both, "What's going on, huh?"

"We weren't fighting. I was just-" Leanne fell sideways into me suddenly and giggled into my shoulder. I looked around helpless. Morello caught my eye and mouthed at me to turn the meth head in.

"She's just tired" I told him mentally kicking myself, "All that running around after chickens all day. It's worn her out"

"Uh huh"

He walked off with a totally uncaring expression and the second he was gone I shoved the meth head off me. She tripped into our cube and grabbed the wall to save herself. I walked in after her when the count was called back correct and I shoved her down onto her bunk. She went down giggling again.

"Where'd you get it?" I demanded harshly shaking her shoulder for attention. She just laughed again.

I stepped back and kicked her bed annoyed. If she still had the drugs and we got searched I'd get more time. Maybe sent to max. Even though they weren't mine. Just being in the same room as drugs now automatically put me up as the dealer.

"Where are they?" I husked at her threateningly. Leanne's expression went serious, for about three seconds. Then she started laughing again.

I groaned to myself and ran a hand through my hair. What the fuck was I going to do?

"Alex! Why didn't you turn her in?" Lorna whispered from the wall. I shook my head and sank onto my bed. Morello crept into the cube and sat beside me. We both looked over at the giggling junkie.

"I don't know" I tipped my head back and sighed, "I was saving my own skin"

Morello nodded, "Good call. If she gets caught you're both screwed"

"Thanks, lorna"

"Sorry. I'm not really good with the talking advice thing. Nicky usually handles it for me"

"What's going on with you two?" I asked over Leanne's laughter. Morello looked away shyly and refused to look at me. She picked at my blanket instead.

"It's nothing. Just stuff"

I smiled, "I know all about stuff" I looked back at Leanne and sighed again, "What am I going to do about that?" I asked her pointing across the cube. Morello shrugged

"Hope she passes out. Otherwise you gotta rough night ahead of you"

I laughed to myself while she stood up. Of course, everything else was going wrong today, why not add lack of sleep too.

"Nighty night, Alex" lorna sang ducking out of the cube. A CO shouted at her to get back to her own cube. I stared at Leanne and wondered how to fix this. I hated knowing my only option was Red.

"Fucking shut up" I growled at her as I got ready for bed.

I settled back on top of my blanket just as the lights got shut off. There was no point using it. I'd be awake all night now. Across the cube Leanne bunked down still laughing into her pillow. I turned onto my side so my back was to her and squeezed my eyes shut. I let my thoughts drift wherever they wanted just so I didn't have to listen to my bunkie. Mom. Piper. Mom. Prison. Kubra. Piper.. Over and over again in an endless circle. Until I wasn't sure whether I was awake anymore.

Soon the soft chatter in the room died down. Most of the women were tired from their day at work. All I could hear were the soft snores mixed with their gentle breathing. And Leanne's fucking giggling.

I took a deep breath and rolled onto my back. I stared up at the ceiling and traced the shadows on the white plaster. My mind drifted again. To Nicky's promise to be my friend. I couldn't help but think she was after something. She wanted in on my pants, that was obvious. But what else? Did she think I could hook her up with some coke maybe? I scoffed. My connections were all dead. The second I got arrested I lost my credibility in the world of the drug lord. I'd well and truly fallen from grace. At least I took as many of those using assholes down with me. I thought about Piper. I wanted to know what she wanted. I was curious. I was always curious about her. Something about her made me want to know everything. Despite the trouble or hurt it caused. I ran a hand through my hair and sighed. I knew it was only a matter of time before I let her come back again. It always was. We boomeranged each other. What the fuck was I going to do?

"Hey" I turned my face back to Leanne. She was propped up on her elbow looking at me.

"What?" I snapped

"Why d'you think you're like you are?"

I laughed quietly. I was not in the mood for a religion rant right now, "Why'd you think?"

"Tucky says its 'cause you gotta demon's soul"

"Well if Tucky says so" I hoped that would close the conversation but she wouldn't let up

"Do you have a demon in you?"

"No I fucking don't!" I growled. Leanne jumped and giggled at me.

"Then why'd she say you did?"

"Because she's crazy?! All you fucking junkies are"

"You're a junkie. I know 'cause I seen you go to them addict meetings" she mumbled. I leant up on my elbow and glared at her

"I am nothing like you"

She heard the threat in my voice and backed down. Good thing too. If she said another thing tonight I'd probably have to kill her. I closed my eyes and focused on the quiet in the room. Hopefully I could drift off.

"What's it like, being gay?" She asked in a dreamy voice. I let out an agree after breath and opened my eyes. I watched her lean back against her pillow looking thoughtful. She was smiling up at the ceiling.

"Why? Want tips?" She frowned at my sarcasm a second and I leant back myself with a sigh. It was quiet for a second before she said,

"I kissed a girl once. It wasn't so bad"

"Bet your church loved that" I shot back annoyed. Why couldn't she just pass out already?

"Fucked her too"

I felt my eyes widen and my neck snap a little when I turned back to her. I stared over at her. Did I just hear that right? Pennsatucky's number one fan fucked a girl? I couldn't be sure whether it was just the drugs talking.

"What?"

"Yeah, she was pretty. Her name was.. Catherine? No, Caitlin. Her dad was the town pastor"

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I chucked despite myself. Before I knew it I was sitting up eager to hear more. Leanne sat up too and nodded. I grinned at her. If it was true that was so fucking badass.

"What happened?" I asked curious. Leanne shrugged and crossed her legs under her

"He found out and he sent her to college in a different state. I got depressed. My friend Joe took me to this party one time, and I saw some guys doing some blow. And they offered me some. And that led to crystal... And here we are" she looked around with a sigh, "Home sweet home"

"So... You were gay before prison? Shouldn't that usually be the other way around?"

"Sorta. I mean.. I didn't really talk to too many girls and guys would give me the drugs if I fucked 'em. Then I came here and I met Pennsatucky. And she helped me find God"

I snorted, "Yeah, how's that working out for you? You feeling all warm and holy yet?" Leanne ignored my sarcasm and let out a miserable sigh. I tilted my head at her. She'd always been the homophobic preaching type. She hung off Tucky's every word. She helped her give me shit. How'd she do that if she was secretly gay herself?

"What happens when you get out of here, Leanne? Still going to be part of God's holy squad? Or do you just pray for the stay?"

She swayed drowsily and I could tell her high was wearing off. She must have taken whatever it was hours ago. If I had to take a guess I'd say it'd been coke. Seemed to fit with her symptoms. Maybe it'd been even heroin. I swallowed. I'd kill to have some of that right now. Not for the high. I didn't crave that. Just the distraction.

"Don't tell the others my secret" she begged suddenly through a teary voice. I groaned to myself. She was a crying downer. Great. She was speaking so quietly I almost missed what she said when she repeated herself, saying she'd do anything to keep me quiet. I shrugged back at her

"Who's going to believe me?"

She didn't reply. She closed her eyes and fell sideways on her mattress with a grown when her head hit the thin pillow. I stood up and stepped over to her side of the cube to check she was okay. I looked down at her in the dark. The moonlight outside peeled through the windows above us and cast a slither of light across her face. She was breathing fast despite falling asleep. She was crying.

"Fucking Christ" I mumbled as I tugged her blanket out from under her and draped it over her body. I didn't really know why I was being nice. After the way she and the others in the bible gang treated me in here I didn't owe her shit. But I guess her story won me over. I guess I understood her a little. And I fucking hated that.

"Hey" I shook her and she mumbled in her sleep. I did it again, "Hey, you got any more if that?"

She frowned in her sleep and mumbled something about her pocket. I looked down at it.

She flinched a little when I pulled my hand down her neck to pinch the tiny bag out of her breast pocket. I ignored her mumbling at me and quickly tucked the bag down my shirt. I stood up and looked around myself undecidedly. I paced a little and swore under my breath before I looked around the room for the COs. There weren't any. I let myself relax a little and sat down on my bed. I pulled the drug out of my shirt and ran my thumb over the plastic. I began fidgeting. My body was remembering what it felt like to have this stuff inside it. My head wanted more. Just so it would feel numb for a while. I missed feeling numb.

I got up quickly and grabbed my toilet roll and walked out the cube. I started towards the dorm door.

I got stopped by a gentle voice whispering my name. I froze and tucked the little bag under my fingers holding the roll. I prayed the dark of the room kept it hidden. I turned back to the light from the CO bubble and forced myself not to look guilty as Fischer tiptoed over.

"Where do you think you're going?" She whispered. She crossed her arms and gave me a stern look. I bit back a smile.

"Toilet" I replied holding the paper up. Fischer gave me an apologising look and shook her head

"I'm sorry but I can't let you go. You had a slot before count-"

"Which I missed because Mendez wouldn't leave me alone" Her eyes turned even more sympathetic and I knew a little more would win her over, "Please? I really gotta pee"

She sighed, "Okay. Only to the toilet and back. No side trips. I'm trusting you, okay?"

I smiled at her, "You're something special you know"

"What do you mean?" She asked innocent. I couldn't help thinking how perfect a mule she'd have made for me. So easily bought and so easily made happy. She'd probably have worked for free if I'd ask. She seemed the blindly trusting and reliable type. A genuinely nice kid. Shame.

"You care. It's not something we see a lot in here. So.. Thanks" I felt a little embarrassed but kept a smile going for her.

Fischer looked away shyly and I felt that itch again telling me I knew her from somewhere. It annoyed the hell out me not knowing. I shifted myself so the toilet roll was out of her line of vision. Even though it was dark I didn't want to risk it.

"You better go now. My shift ends soon and I don't want you to get in trouble" I nodded and turned away from her.

I went straight to the toilet where I stood in front of the sinks holding the bag of white powder in my hand. I was tempted. My hands shook a little. I might have been a semi active junkie before but I never got these cravings before. Even the withdrawals had been nothing. I thought my day over. This white powder could make it vanish for a while. But then..

"What's the point?"

I opened the bag and tipped it up. The powder fell into the sink and clung to the moisture lining the bowl. I closed my eyes as I twisted the tap. I couldn't watch it go down the drain. I knew I'd try and snatch it back. I took a deep breath when it was done and walked to the toilet to flush the bag. I washed my hands clean and looked at myself in the mirror. I was proud of myself. I'd gotten back a little control.


	6. Chapter 6

**_Ello kids! Looking for the tune of the day? It's Play The Game by Kodaline. It's another chapter blend people! Actually it's more the rest off the last chapter.. I write too much it seems. But anyways, here's your update! Its split into different scenes again so sorry if its hard to keep up. Hopefully it makes sense. Enjoy :)_**

* * *

"Okay, okay. Jennifer Lawrence, but she's got killer flu, or Miley Cyrus, after disney threw up on her?"

I hummed thoughtfully, "Is this before or after she wrote wrecking ball?" I asked. Nicky grinned

"After"

I narrowed my eyes at her, "Is she allowed to put that sledgehammer of hers to good use?"

"Nope"

"How sick is Jen?" I asked. Nicky's smile widened some more

"Seriously sick. Like if she goes down on you? You're gonna get more than wet. If you know what I mean.."

I felt my face wrinkle up in disgust and she chuckled. I took another load of washing out the dryer to fold before I answered her.

"Lawrence"

"But she's got flu! That's gross!" I shrugged and she laughed some more, "wait up a second, so you're telling me you like the idea of someone sneezing all over your twat?"

I met her hazel eyes and pulled my glasses up to rest on my head.

"You'd rather fuck a crazy bitch?" I threw back smiling as I leant in close past her for the wash bags. Nicky looked down at me as I did with a smile

"Hey, there's nothing wrong with crazy. Personally I admire a girl who likes to twerk"

I laughed at her and carried on folding shirts. She threw one at me suddenly with a smirk when it smacked me in the chest. I caught it before it could knock my folded pile over and playfully whipped it at her. Nicky jumped out of reach with a light laugh. She started to reach out but I pulled the shirt back before she could yank it out of my grip and I folded it neatly like the others.

"Actually I'm surprised you didn't go for her" I looked up from the shirts and tilted my head at her. Nicky shrugged at me with a playful grin, "I thought you liked a girl who rode balls"

I gave her an icy look and she chuckled. Her hands rose up in surrender and she apologised to me. I threw some dirty pants at her in revenge. She squealed and flicked them off her chest with a comment on how mean I was. I scoffed back at her. She was lucky that's all I did.

"It's your turn, kid" she told me as I folded another shirt. I shrugged and stayed silent. I wasn't in the mood for her game anymore.

Nicky looked disappointed. Like a kid who'd had her toy taken away. I ignored the puppy eyes she gave me and carried on working. She always managed to remind me of a certain somebody when she did that.

She sighed when she realised I meant it and she hopped herself up on the table to sit in front of my pile of washing. She crossed her legs over and watched me bored. I smiled to myself. I could see now how red could see her as a daughter. If she acted like a kid then she'd get treated like one.

"What?" She asked smiling at my smile. I shrugged back at her and carried on folding.

"Hey, how're things now?" She asked me.

I paused folding for a second to look at her. Her smile said she was being friendly. Her eyes said she wanted the latest on the piper stuff. And I honestly didn't want to talk about it.

"Not today, Nick" I told her removing my eyes from hers and back to my washing.

I heard her let out an irritated sigh, disappointed as ever with my refusing to let her in on my big story. She slumped in her seated position and hung her head on her palm. Her reaction had me wanting to laugh. Instead I carried on working. Ignoring her and ignoring the way my mind was trying to drift back to piper.

The alarm for dinner rang over our followed silence and Nicky and I both groaned happy. We'd both been working all morning and had skipped breakfast with no offer of lunch. Something I'd learned Nicky should never do. To say she was grumpy was putting it very mildly. She'd spent most of the morning split between cleaning up the chapel with the others and growling at anybody who spoke to her. I'd only been spared because I played her silly games. But I was feeling her completely. I was starving too.

I dumped the pile of clothing Id been folding and left it on the side of the bench for another girl to finish later. Nicky was practically bouncing out the door. She told me to hurry up. I told her to shut up.

We shuffled quickly to the cafeteria and hopped into the long line. Morello walked in a couple seconds later and made to join us with a smile for me. When she saw Nicky though she stopped in her tracks and moved into the back of the line. I frowned back at Nicky with morellos behaviour.

"What was that?" I asked her pointing back at where morello was hiding down the line behind Bursett. Nicky didn't even look up but she knew what I was talking about.

"Shitty drama" she muttered picking up a tray. She handed me one and slumped over to the serving counter.

I looked back at morello. Her eyes were trained on Nicky. She looked nervous. I gave her a smile when she glanced at me and she grinned happy like nothing was wrong. She stopped short though when red pulled her out of the lunch line. I watched in concern while the short Russian hauled morello back to an abandoned corner of the room to talk. She shuffled the younger woman past a CO stood on guard by the bin and pulled her close to whisper in her ear. Morello looked scared and she quickly shook her head at an unimpressed Red. I watched on confused. What were they talking about?

Somebody shoved me from behind suddenly, tipping my focus back to the front of the room. I got bustled forward another step by the impatient woman behind me. I gritted my teeth and stood straight. I wouldn't let them push me around like it. And I started to turn to tell her so but when I did I caught a flash of blonde and recognised piper stood talking to yoga in the line. How'd I miss her walking in?

I forgot all about the girl behind me and just stared at Piper. Letting my eyes consume her.

"Stretch, you're holding the line!"

I twisted back to the front. Gina was stood behind the food station dolled up in an apron and hair net. A spoon all ready in her hand. I glared at her

"Okay shortie, fucking stop with calling me stretch already. Shit's getting old"

"Or what?" She husked, giving me a mean look. I glared straight back. I didn't have anything. She could cut off my food and ask red to have me killed. I could just throw her a dirty look. And she knew that. That's why she slowly started to smirk.

"Oh, I wouldn't mess with this one" crazy eyes leant her tray forward beside me suddenly. She looked back at me and leant across the food station. She raised her hand to hide her mouth as she whispered loudly to Gina, "she real crazy when she angry"

I rolled my eyes. Gina looked back at the other woman and then at me. She backed down when the other woman smiled crazy at her.

"Just move along already!" Gina growled dumping food on the next girls tray.

I smirked and moved up to Norma and another lackey to get my food. I hadn't expected the help, and no way did I want or ask for it, but crazy sure did save my bacon. Still, I wasn't going to thank her for it.

I turned with my tray to find myself a seat. The tables had been segregated into parties for the wac election. I rolled my eyes and took a step towards one of the 'white' tables.

"One minute, Vause"

I groaned and let red pull me over to the side of the room. Her grip was tight on my arm as she steered me away from the others to the same secluded corner of the room she'd dragged lorna to.

Half me feared she was about to punish me for saying what I did to one of her daughters. Most of me didn't care anymore.

"What now?" I asked in a tired voice. Red gave me a stern look for my rudeness and jumped straight into it.

"You're voting for lorna" she growled lowly. I blinked at her

"Morello's running?"

"She is now. And she will win. Otherwise-"

"Fine" I cut in quick. Red blinked back at me,

"What?"

"She's got my vote. Can I go now?"

Red nodded a little dumbstruck and I walked over to my table. Obviously she was used to the girls talking back, or questioning her. Maybe a few even blackmailed her for their loyalty. Honestly I didn't care. I just wanted to eat.

I sidestepped a few of the golden girls easing themselves slowly into their seats and settled myself down opposite Nicky who was picking at her food like a moody teen. When I looked down beside me I saw why. Morello was chatting quickly despite nobody listening to her. Nicky looked ready to stab herself with her fork.

I smiled at her and dug into my crappy food, only glancing back when Nicky's foot nudged mine under the table. I never really had her down as a footsie girl so I looked up.

And immediately regretted it.

I watched Piper slowly sit down across from me with a cautious look in my direction. And I sort of just froze up. I hadn't been this close to her in days. We'd just sort of silently agreed to avoid each other. And it'd been working great. It was almost like she wasn't here. It'd let me get back to that numb point I'd been at before she'd arrived at Litchfield, minus the Nicky reminders. But now I was snapping straight back to missing her. And all she'd done was appear at our table to eat. I didn't want her to sit with us but at the same time she couldn't go anywhere else. And I'd been the one to point out we had to live together. And I didn't want her to go.

Her eyes caught mine as she sat down and I pushed my food away. Suddenly I wasn't so hungry.

"What do you think about yellow and pink?" Morello was chirping, completely unaware of the tense atmosphere surrounding the table, "They're my wedding colors. It's just a real pretty combination. But I don't wanna tell Christopher, 'cause I don't want him to get jealous"

"'Course not. You wouldn't want him to think you liked pink in prison, right, Morello?" Nicky cut in sarcastically. Morello gave her the finger and Nicky scoffed, "Still can't believe you're running for this lame shit"

"Red told me to. I'm her pick. You want me to say no to her?"

Nicky stared back at her. Piper looked back at me. I held her eyes a moment before switching my attention back to the other two. Nicky looked shocked. And hurt. Maybe she expected Red to pick her.

"She picked you?" Nicky asked in disbelief. Morello sat straighter. Her eyes gleamed suddenly.

" got a problem with that?"

Nicky was speechless for a couple seconds before she laughed awkwardly, "I just think it would have been smarter for her to pick a dyke...A real dyke"

I chuckled over her, "Yeah, Nick, last time I checked, Lorna was pretty gay. Gay for you, as a matter of fact" I realised too late I'd hit home with the problem. Nicky turned back to me angry.

"Oh, you didn't hear? We're done. Well, she's gotta start working on tightening her pussy muscles, 'cause her fiancé's dick is so small, it's like a hot dog in a hallway. So.."

The two girls glared at each other. Piper looked away mouthing wow to herself. I just sniggered under my breath. That's what all this was about? Morello getting cold feet and Nicky getting pissed about it?

Piper glanced back at me suddenly. I looked back down at the table and played with my food. Yeah, i knew how Nicky felt.

Everybody looked up at the new noise in the corner of the room. Tastey was up and jigging in her usual loud way, singing about being the wac president while the other black ladies cheered. Sometimes it was hard believing I'd been sentenced to live with a bunch of kids.

Piper turned round in her seat with a bright smile for morello that lit her entire face. I found myself looking away again when i couldn't breathe right.

"So, who are you running against besides Taystee?" Piper asked lorna. Typical she'd restart the conversation. She always did hate confrontation. I chanced it and looked up again.

Nicky was leant against her arm with a bored look and a groan when lorna looked ready to dive into prison politics. Morello ignored her. She shook her hand at piper and pointed a finger over at the other women in the room.

"She don't count. Black ladies just run against the other black ladies. My competition is Pennsatucky" I smirked, that was hardly competition, "But it don't matter, because Red's gonna make all the white girls vote for me"

I nodded. With Red growling orders at all the white girls like she had me, lorna would win hands down. Especially if all she had to worry about was a backward retard.

Piper looked confused by lorna's reply. And surprised. I smiled despite myself when I saw the innocent sparkle in her eyes. It got me filling with butterflies somehow. I didn't get it. How did she manage to make me hate her and love her all at once?

"So, you only run against white people?" She asked frowning. God it took me straight back to that book memory again. And I didn't like it because it had me softening up towards her. Again.

I shuffled my feet under the table. Started fidgeting with my glasses. Anything to block out the sound of her voice.

My foot brushed Nicky's and she looked up interested. I shook my head slightly at her.

She glanced back at where I was looking and I heard her laugh under her breath when she saw Piper looking shocked.

"You can only vote within your race or your group…" she told piper. Piper still looked confused, "Look, just pretend it's the 1950s. It makes it easier to understand"

Piper's frown deepened some more and she listened intently to what morello was saying to her. I used her distraction to get a full look at her. I had to take a deep breath when I did. Piper was still so beautiful. Even with the effects of prison wearing in. Her eyes still managed to sparkle. Their blue was still my favourite colour. And her smile, Christ, I wanted so bad to feel it again. To taste it.

My eyes continued to run all over her only to move away quickly when she subtly sent a look my way. I hid my smile and pretended to look down bored at the table. When I looked up again she'd returned her attention to lorna. I leant my hand on my chin and let out a silent breath of frustration. Under the table Nicky kicked me. Her smirk flickered between piper and me. Clearly she wanted to know the story. I ignored her and turned to focus back on the conversation.

"But how is that an effective system?" Piper was arguing in that innocent voice. I rolled my eyes, "Not every Hispanic person wants the same thing"

"Oh, sure they do" Lorna replied waving pipers reasoning away, "They all want to come to America"

The table stared at her. I felt my jaw drop with her comment before I grinned at her.

"Jesus!" Nicky gasped, "Your entire world view is based on West Side Story, isn't it?"

"Can we get back to Lorna being racist?" I asked touching lorna's arm gently. Across the table i saw piper's lips twist a little, "Just more of that, please"

"Okay, fine" morello relented sitting up in her seat, "See, I know because my neighbourhood is near them…"

I leant down against the table and propped myself up on my arm. My eyes and smile were trained on morello but i wasn't listening to a word she said. I knew piper was watching my every move right now. I wanted to see how far I could push her before she snapped and left. Because obviously she was jealous. I'd seen her play the ignore you card so many times before in the past when she got envious of others having my attention. I knew she was trying to work it out in her head. And it amused me to watch.

Nicky kicked me again when morello was done. I just shook my head chuckling to myself. Who knew she was so racist huh?

"Ladies, your attention please" Healy's voice sounded through the pa speakers and echoed in the hall stopping all the talk. While he went into the wac details that nobody listened to and when the other two weren't looking, Nicky leant across the table with a sly grin

"What're you playing, vause?" she whispered

I gave her a hitched smirk. She knew exactly what I was up to. I answered her anyway.

"The waiting game"

One of us was going to break. I knew that. And Piper knew that. Personally, I was betting on her. Nicky was shaking her head laughing. She was so amused by our little show of back and forth. If she knew the truth she'd be laughing even more.

Across a couple tables the hispanics had started cheering and clapping on the table. We all looked around at them with laughs when we saw them up and dancing. Tastey was quick to get up and join in. Everybody was. I glanced back at Pipers amused smile for it all before I noticed Nicky get up and sneak off the bench to walk towards the kitchen. I guess she was going to confront Red about the pick thing. Personally I hoped she was better at talking to red than the rest of us. I didn't want to see her get starved too.

"Hey shut up!"

Pornstache was screaming and waving his hands at us all to quieten down. The other guards were watching on with clueless expressions that said they didn't know what to do. Mendez carried on yelling himself red. Nobody listened to him until he walked round to the kitchen doors and smacked his palm against the raid alarm button there. We all groaned when the siren sounded and everybody quickly slipped out of their seats to their bellies on the cold floor.

Pornstache took a few calming breaths before he launched into a shouted lecture on prison rules and how we weren't allowed to have fun. He started slowly pacing around the room in his usual threatening way so he could scare us. I let myself zone out completely. Who the fuck cared about prison rules? He very clearly didn't.

My eyes flickered between the dusty floor and piper where she laid face down against her hands. I smiled to myself. Like a startled deer she was hiding herself from everything. Just like she always did. I always liked this piper. It was like seeing her for the first time again. Back in that bar where i met her. She'd been a little deer back then too.

"Its okay" I whispered to her against my own judgement. I could never help myself. I reached out to touch her sleeve, "They cant do whatever he's saying. They're all talk"

Her head lifted and she met my smile with a nervous one of her own. I tried to stop myself grinning. She wasn't glaring. Or moving her hand away. That was a good sign, right? Her brow creased a little. Her eyes tipped down to where my fingers brushing against her wrist. And I couldn't understand the look in them when she looked back at me. Was it confusion? Relief maybe? Her lips parted a little and she looked ready to say something. I leant forward a little more. I was curious to know what was eating her this time.

"Now get up and fuck off out of my cafeteria!" Pornstache bellowed directly behind me suddenly. Piper jumped and i sniggered a little. She scowled at me.

Everybody got up but us. We just stayed there watching each other until somebody nudged their boot into my side

"You love birds done chirping?" I glanced back at Morello and she grinned as she held a hand down for me.

I nodded to myself and accepted the help up. I leant back to help piper but she'd already shot off. I frowned as i clocked her shuffling past the bin to the doors. I didn't get it. She obviously wanted to talk but she refused to?

"She's a strange kid, huh" Morello commented staring after piper too. I nodded back at her

"She's fucked up" I muttered grabbing my tray off the table to dump. Morello giggled and she followed me

"Well you know what they say, vause, it takes one to know one"

"Oh, i know I'm a fuck up" i replied with half a smile for her, "I embrace it each morning with my cornbread. That one though.." i sighed and looked down at the woman beside me, "She's in denial"

"Aren't we all?" she returned winking as she left me to sneak into the rec room. I wasn't sure what she said had been a reference to me or to herself. And honestly, i didn't care.

I walked along the hall wondering what i should do today. I didn't have work until this afternoon but unfortunately neither did my bunkie. She'd turned nastier in the past few days. The drug withdrawals and her fear I'd blab made her impossible to be around. You'd think she'd be grateful I was staying quiet. You'd think I'd blackmail her. And maybe I would have. But I was saving it for a special rainy day.

So I didn't go back to my cube. Fuck if i had to be put through another bible rant. I instead I joined the slow moving meds line for my daily dosage of anti-depressants. I hated them. I hated being told I had to take them. Like it was up to everybody else whether I should be happy or not.

I cheeked the pills when it was my turn. I wasn't going to let them control my feelings too. I pretended to swallow and opened my mouth for O'niel to check the pills were gone. When he said I could go I walked back past the bitches laughing in line and spat the pills into my hand. I tucked them into my pocket and wandered up the hall. The girl was waiting for me when I turned the corner to the supply closet. I leant up against the wall beside her and felt her knock my hand. I took the eyeliner and reached up to my pocket for the pills. She didn't say anything as she took them. Just slipped them into her palm and walked away. I watched her go as i pocketed my new eyeliner. I never learnt her name. She'd never told me. She was always silent and I never cared enough to ask. Still, she was more cooperative than most of the dealers I'd handled before.

"What you doing, Vause?" Bell asked stopping beside me with a suspicious look. I shrugged back at her. Her eyes turned into little suspicious slits before she walked off up the hall.

Deciding I'd better move before another CO saw me I started to walk back to the dorm to dump my makeup. I stopped halfway. It'd only get stolen if i tried hiding it. But where else would I go?

I let out a frustrated breath. When you didn't have work occupying your time here things got way too boring fast. There were only so many times you could do the same thing before it made you want to scream. I thought about maybe visiting the library again but decided against it. I was bored of reading. I was bored of walking too. I was just bored.

In the end I opted for the rec room. I thought I might be able to catch something decent on the tv. Or play a game with one of the others. Anything was better than aimlessly wandering around.

When I entered the room lorna was still there working on a manifesto for her epic wac campaign and I immediately recognised Nicky's moping face staring in concentration at her scrabble board. And of course. Opposite her looking in her absolute element was Piper. My skin tingled a little. I felt this weird rush buzz through me. And when she laughed happy with her new word I felt my heart skip feverishly.

"Fuck" I mumbled. Why couldn't I just win this for once?

Lorna's head shot up when she heard me. Her eyes lit up when she saw me stood by the door and she quickly bustled over to grab my arm and pull me over to her table to help. I ignored piper and Nicky and sat myself down with my back to them. I looked down at Lorna's work and frowned. She'd written up a manifesto for her future leadership. There were so many silly promises. And all were things she couldn't exactly promise.

"This is the campaign strategy?" I asked reading her scribbled point of making sure red stopped starving us. Granted, with one like that she'd get a few happy voters.

"No, it's more like a life strategy. Everyone likes to get fed"

I shrugged. She had a point. Still, I didn't get why she was bothering with a campaign. Not when red was going to rig the entire thing. Maybe she wanted to make herself feel better knowing she'd put some effort in. Morello had they half moral thing about her after all.

Behind me I could hear Nicky and piper muttering in hushed voices. i caught piper saying she felt like an asshole. I felt like laughing. What was there to feel? She was an asshole.

I turned my head a little towards them so I could catch more of what they said. It sounded like they were talking about Piper having to talk to somebody. I frowned some more.

Morello was poking my shoulder suddenly, asking for some advice on how to make her campaign look better. I thought about it a moment.

"What about, like, a snappy kind of slogan?" She asked, "Something with rhymes in it?"

I laughed, "What about, "Vote for Morello because she's not yellow, she's white"?"

Laughter sounded behind me and made me look around

"That's good" Piper chuckled to herself.

I shook my head and turned back around, fully annoyed for some reason.

"Wanna be more obvious?" Nicky was asking piper. She got a kick for it.

I focused back on lorna again and ignored the flushed feeling i got when i felt pipers eyes on my back. My hands clenched under the table and I fought the strong urge to turn and talk to her. It had me frowning at the table hard.

This was getting harder.

* * *

"He's being extradited?" I repeated staring shocked at the man sat in front of me.

He was in a black business suit with his black hair gelled back. If I had to guess I'd say he was probably in his late twenties, early thirties. Old enough to have left college but definitely not old enough to know how to help me out of this place. I hated how they were getting kids to defend me.

"Thats what we're hoping for" the man sat back with a smug grin, "Do i work miracles or what?"

i ignored him, "When?"

"Its on going right now. The courts are trying to appeal to the Turkish government to have him extradited back to the States so we can put him on trial. All going well we should-"

"Skip to the part that involves me" I snapped at impatiently.

The lawyer grinned at me, "We'll of course need everything you have on him. Work. Payments. Meetings. Since his main man is gone.." I stared up at him. I felt my composure slip.

"Fahri's dead?" He nodded. I felt the breath leave me, "Shit" I glanced back at him, "How?"

"Suicide. He was found in a flat in Brooklyn last month. We suspect it was Kubra's work. Its not the first death to be reported. He seems to be trying to cover up. You're lucky you're in here"

"Lucky?!" I snapped angry. A CO nearby gave me a warning and i hushed my voice, "Im in fucking hell!"

He smiled back at me, "But you still have your life. And your sanity, apparently. Thats luck"

I shook my head and glared at another inmate two tables over. In my head I was punching my anger out on her face.

My lawyer leant closer a moment, "We'll need your ex there too"

My eyes instantly snapped back to him, "Piper? Why?"

He looked back at me like it should be obvious.

"You took her with you. She met Kubra. She carried for Christ's sake!"

"It was only money!" I argued back. He chuckled at me

"All the better. That sort of thing implies he knew her personally. He trusted her"

"But she did it for me!"

"Thats not how the courts see it. Now, Mr Balik will be tried as soon as we can drag him back here. All I need you to do..."

I stopped listening. My mind was on overdrive with thoughts. Fahri would have never committed suicide. He'd told me many times that he saw it as a cowards way out of facing his problems. Kubra had had him murdered. And I could only imagine the sorts of torture they put my friend through before they ended it.

I winced to myself and took a deep breath to keep from crying. Fahri had been a good friend despite everything. He'd always been there. He'd been a dad almost. And now he was gone.

Clearly this was a message. Kubra wanted me to know that he didn't do mercy. Not even for old friends. He'd do the same to me and everybody else that tried to take him down. And that meant piper too.

I stared down at the table. If this went to trial he'd see her, hear her tell them all she knew him. He'd remember who she was. What she was to me. He'd put her on the list of dead bodies. A chill crawled up my spine. He'd hurt her to get to me. And I couldn't let that happen. I had to keep piper safe. This place was the only thing doing that right now. I didn't know how long she had on her sentence but once she left this prison..

She had to remain invisible. She had t stay safe.

We couldn't go to trial.

"You wont get him back here" I said cutting in on whatever self inflating thing my lawyer was saying, "He's too smart. Has too many connections. So thanks for the visit" I stood up. My lawyer stood too.

"Alex, please, have a little faith in the system"

I laughed, "Why should I trust it? What has it ever done for me?"

He didn't say anything. He even looked stumped. I scoffed,

"Y'know, I don't know why I pay you. You cant fix shit"

I walked out of the visitation room and waited outside bell's door to be searched. After a couple minutes of search and humiliation I was allowed to join the rest of the prison.

I was angry. Furious really. And not because my lawyer was doing a good job for once. But because piper had to be dragged through all this shit again. It never ended. Every time i thought I got fixed something came along to fuck it up. I should have never named her. She'd never forgive me if it went to trial and we got the raw end of the deal. Because i knew thats what would happen. Kubra would walk and we'd get more time. Or worse, we'd get hits sent out on us.

I stopped walking and leant against the wall. I took a few steadying breaths and braced my hands on my knees. I was trying hard to breathe out the images in my head. I'd seen what kubra did to people who turned on him. I'd first hand witnessed them happening. He was cold and brutal. He was the type of man who took pleasure in hurting someone as much as possible, for as long as possible. For someone like me, who'd been right in his inner circle with Fahri, the things he'd do to me?

I shivered to myself. It was only because we were in prison he hadn't taken me and Piper down already. That was the only thing keeping us safe. Keeping her safe. I couldn't let us get to that trial. Ever.

"Hello Alex! Oh.. are you okay?"

I made myself nod and pushed myself up straight. No matter how weak I was feeling i couldn't show it. Otherwise I'd be dead before kubra got his hands on me.

I looked back at the woman speaking to me and I nodded again when I realised it was the nun.

"Im fine. I just had a bad visit is all"

"From your mother no doubt" the nun chuckled, "These women, always unhappy with their children"

I felt my heart squeeze painfully but I nodded anyway, "Exactly. Mom wasn't happy with me"

"She'll get over it. You might want to get a bustle on now. Its nearly count time and your bathroom slot is nearly over"

I swore under my breath. I'd completely forgotten. The sister gave me a disapproving look for my cuss. i apologised and left her to speed walk to my dorm for my shower supplies.

* * *

The water was hot when i eventually got into the shower stall. I guess all this wac stuff had the others distracted. I ducked under the water and soaked up the heat eagerly. I let out a deep sigh. i hadn't had a shower this hot in so long. It made me miss my big en suite back home.

"Hey hurry up already!" A girl called tapping the plastic door to my stall.

i growled under my breath and ignored her, pushing my palm to trap the plastic against the wall of the stall when she tried to pull it open and force me out. She moved away to try another stall and I leant back under the water again. I didn't get why the bitches in this place were so damn fucking annoying. It was like privacy was a big no go here.

I let myself think about Fahri as I rinsed my hair. I let myself grieve a little. Let myself think up all these things that had happened to him. And then I let myself get mad about it. Kubra would pay for this. But a trial wouldn't be enough now. Making him rot in a cell for the rest of his life was plain mercy.

"Ladies! Count time in ten!" A guard called in from the door.

The girls in the growing shower line all groaned and I heard them begin to disperse out of the bathroom. They wouldn't be washing until tomorrow. If they were lucky.

I rinsed out the last of the shampoo from my hair and slicked it back away from my face. I took a deep breath and washed the anger off my face before I shut the water off and stepped back to the stall curtain to grab my towel. I wrapped it quick around myself and slipped around the curtain still tightening it. Somebody stepped into the stall behind me when i stepped out of it. It had me looking up surprised.

Out of the corner of my eye I could see the blurry outline of someone else stood by the stall next to me. I looked sideways. My eyes caught on Nicky's while the curtain shut closed behind me. I hadn't guessed she'd be here this time of night. Usually she was somewhere else. I glanced away from her and down to the towel wrapped around her shoulders. It was loose so her breasts were covered. But I wasn't interested in that. I followed the flushed skin on her neck to the deep looking pale scar running down the centre of her chest. It was straight and clean. Obviously a surgical scar.

"That's a hell of a scar" I told her. Nicky looked down at it then back at me.

"Pervert" She walked around me with a smile. I grinned after her before I followed

"I like your tits, too" I joked.

We walked around the stalls back to the mirrors. It surprised me how her stuff was sat next to mine at the sink. She must have walked in after me. Nicky leant across the sink for her toothbrush and I got another look at her scar. It looked like serious surgery had been done.

"Baboon heart?" I asked casually. Nicky shrugged

"Bacterial infection"

I nodded in understanding, "Endocarditis"

She looked up at me surprised

"What, drug pusher-slash-heart surgeon?"

I chuckled, "Just the former. It was pretty common among our top customers…" I eyed her. She was so different from my usual cliental. I wondered why that was, "You miss it?

"Holy shit, so much! More than good coffee, more than sleeping in the dark, more than wearing skirts-"

I laughed, "You wore skirts?" I didn't know why but that picture just didn't fit right with her. She seemed the jeans and tee kinda gal.

Nicky's smile glazed as she moved her eyes dreamily to the wall behind me.

"Yeah. I loved a good skirt" She blinked back, "You?"

"I don't miss smack. I was such a lousy junkie. Never fully committed" I answered rooting around in my bag for my tweezers, "But the business, man, that I miss. The adrenaline, the power"

"Yeah, I miss cooking it. Which makes me an idiot, right?" I didn't say anything, just looked at myself in the mirror. Nicky carried on, " I'd let it bubble, even though you waste it when you do that… I just loved the chemistry, you know? The routine. I am a sucker for ritual"

I smiled and leant away from the mirror to look at her, "Look at us, Nichols. Same coin, different sides" I mused.

Nicky raised her toothbrush and shrugged.

"Supply and demand, motherfucker" I chuckled and leant across the sink to fix my brows. Nicky was brushing her teeth beside me, watching me interested through the mirror. I glanced back at her with a smile she returned.

"Hi Alex"

Nicky smirked at me and I forced myself to look over my shoulder in the pretence of wondering who had spoken. But i didn't need to look to know. I knew that voice anywhere.

I barely glanced at Piper. Just turned myself back to the mirror and ignored the confusion in me that begged to know why she'd openly spoken to me like that. Why the sudden turn around in her mood towards me? I felt so frustrated at her. Why did she always one-eighty herself? She made it so hard to keep up with her all the time. Nicky touched my arm while i angrily started to clean my teeth and she smiled when i turned my face to her. She chuckled at my expression and wiped my chin clean with her thumb.

"She's gone"

I shrugged back at her, "Who?"

"Don't give me that. What do you think she wanted?"

"I don't care"

I rinsed off my brush and threw it back in my bag. Nicky had another of her smug expressions going when I checked myself in the mirror. I had to take a deep breath to keep myself from smacking her one.

"Ladies! Count time! Now!"

Nicky swore beside me, "I swear, man, another CO telling me when to move it is getting a kick right up the-"

"I wouldn't tell them that" I chuckled lowering her fisted hand.

She shrugged back at me and turned from me to pull her shirt on again. I did the same. Bell rounded the corner suddenly as we hopped into our pants. She started shouting us out and writing up shots for girls still in the bathroom.

We quickly grabbed our things and bustled out with the other remaining girls. Knowing bell she'd shot us for some over the top thing we didn't do.

When we were out in the main hallway again i turned to say bye to Nichols. She grinned back at me

"Not tonight, vause. Looks like's we're roomies"

i grinned, "No way?"

"Oh yeah, baby! She is finally free from the room of death!" I raised a brow at her and her smile fell a little, "Too insensitive?"

"Just a little. C'mon trouble" we started walking again. Nicky practically skipped. I had to laugh. She looked so dorky. But in a cute way I guess. She'd really hated it in the rooms.

"Which cube 're you in?" I asked her as we walked.

"Im in with Tricia" she seemed happy with it. personally i couldn't understand why. I gave her a smile anyway

"That puts you next to morello" i sang at her with a teasing nudge. Nicky's smile stayed put though. Maybe she'd known i'd bring that up.

"Puts me right opposite you too" she said hooking her arm around my neck, "looks like that sleepover's looking even more eventual now" she sighed dreamily and I flicked her arm down and turned serious again.

"Keep dreaming Nichols"

Nicky chuckled back at me, "You wait, i'll have you one day. You cant escape Nicky"

I shook my head at her and smiled down at the floor. Oh, to have that young optimistic ego again.

"Y'know you remind me of someone" She looked back at me interested

"Who?"

"Me. Around eleven years ago"

She laughed again and told me that wasn't such a bad thing. I couldn't help but laugh back. Nicky had no idea.

We walked into the dorm and to our separate cubes. Tricia looked confused when Nicky took a stance up beside her but when Nicky winked at her she hugged the other girl happy. I smiled at them. Big sister and little sister reunited. Cute. Red walked past them both with a warm smile. You could tell from the smug glint in her eye that she'd gotten Nicky back.

I think I was starting to get the whole prison family deal. It looked pretty safe from where I was standing. But then if you weren't blood you could always turn on each other. I wondered whether they saw that as an advantage to prison life, or another disadvantage. Personally i saw it as a reason to stay out of a family here. It always hurt worse getting fucked over by the people closest to you.

I let my eyes follow red back to her cube and I looked down the line of women as the clicking for count started. I caught morello shifting nervously on the spot across from me on the way back. Her eyes were glued to Nicky. I guess I understood why. Nicky was pretty persistent. If she ever got over this dumb dumped phase she could very easily charm morello over again. And it was made even easier now the two were neighbours. I couldn't help but feel sorry for morello. I could ward Nicky off fine but i knew lorna wouldn't. It was always made harder when you already connect. I should know.

"Okay, thank you ladies!" the two COs walked back to the bubble and everybody else walked into their cubes.

I rounded the wall to my cube and I took off my glasses and dumped myself on my bed. My bunkie was fidgeting on her mattress. Probably having itchy withdrawals. I sighed and turned so to face the wall. My eyes caught on a photo I had tacked up and hidden just beneath the mattress line. I pushed my weight over a little more so it came into view and I gently touched it. Me, mom, and piper smiled back at me. I closed my eyes.

This was definitely getting harder.


	7. Chapter 7

_**Hi again people! I know! Two updates in one night? What is this madness?! Basically I wrote the last chapter, had too many words, scrapped a lot, redid some bits and ended up with thrice as much as before. So hello two chapters instead. This might be iffy or too fast but personally Im just happy to be getting this out cos now I can hit the better Vauseman scenes. And don't worry! I haven't forgotten the flashbacks! There will be more flashbacks to come!**_

_**Oh! And the song for this update is; Hearts on Fire by Passenger. I thought it worked with the last part of this chapter. Thanks for reading and don't forget to review! **_

* * *

"I saw chapman earlier, striding all saintly into Healy's office like some angel. I tell you guys, she's a freaking snake if there ever was one"

The others mumbled a half hearted agreement but Pennsatucky was on too much of a roll to notice they were bored,

"Why does he love her so much anyway? Don't he know she's one of them lesbians?"

"I think she has a fiancé" Lizzie offered with a confused expression. I rolled my eyes at them when they all glanced back a me for confirmation.

Pennsatucky scoffed and shook the shirt she'd been folding

"Man, who the fuck would want to marry that? Anybody with eyes can see there's no loyal bone in its body"

I tried not to let her words creep into my head. I didn't want her knowing I was secretly agreeing with her. Piper wasn't loyal. Not to herself anyway. I carried on folding but kept my ears open to their conversation.

"I think she's nice" Abigail was mumbling.

Pennsatuckys head whipped round to the corner where Abigail was tagging bags for personal laundry piles. She threw the girl a disgusted look before she scoffed again

"The snake that talked to Eve was nice too, Abigail. That's why he didn't bite her. Why do that when he could forsake all humans to the wilderness?"

"I thought God made heaven so his creations couldn't harm each other?" Lizzie pitched confused. The other girls mumbled agreeing. Pennsatucky looked stumped a second

"Anyway!" She called gaining their attention, "We're talkin' about chapman. And I'm sure she is nice. Until she runs outta reasons to use you. I tell ya, she might have Healy wrapped around her finger but there's people higher than him that'll stick her in her place"

"Like who?" Leanne asked frowning. Pennsatucky gave them all an irritated look.

"God, Leanne. _God._ The highest person we know"

"So you know him personally now?" I asked. I couldn't help it. She was pissing me off with her piper rant. Pennsatuckys eyes moved back to me and she nodded

"We all do. We follow him. We are his sheep. His herd. And only his followers are allowed to-"

"Ramble complete bullshit twenty-four-seven?" I offered bored.

She glared at me. Her face turned a little red with her anger. She walked around the table separating us and stepped into my space. I kept doing my work. Why waste effort squaring off to a hillbilly. We all knew I'd have her pinned in three seconds.

"You know, for someone whose so close to Chapman, I don't hear you standing up for her, Vause"

"That's because I'm not close to her" I told her shortly. She laughed

"Yeah right. We all heard the rumours. We all seen what you two are like together. All them looks you give each other all the time"

I gave her a bored look in reply and she smirked like it was a confession.

"Ladies!" We all looked up at the guard walking in. He looked around and pointed at the others, "You, you and you. Yard. Now"

Abigail and Lizzy jumped up and rushed out like they were told. Pennsatucky stayed looking at me. The guard glared annoyed at her

"And you Pennsatucky, now!"

"But we gonna be short of hands for the laundry" she pointed out with a wave around the room. He didn't look like he cared

"These two can do it. Now go" he barked at her, "Before I send you to shu"

She gave him a little smile and gave him a little curtsy before she walked out. When she passed around him she gave Leanne a look. The other girl nodded.

"How are we supposed to get all this done by tonight?" I asked the guard before he had a chance to follow Pennsatucky out. He shrugged back at me

"Do I look like I give a shit?"

"No?" Leanne answered.

I let out and angry breath and resigned myself to folding faster. Knowing my luck she wouldn't help. The guard turned on his heel and paced slowly out. Leanne left it a couple seconds after he'd gone before she jumped up and walked around her table to the door too.

"Hey where're you going?" I shot at her. She slid to a stop and turned back to me. She pointed behind her,

"I gotta-"

"Oh no you don't. I am not doing all your work and theirs on my own"

"But-" she shut up when I gave her a glare and slowly moved back to her work station. Her head hung miserably while she returned to folding sheets. I moved back to my own work.

The silence that followed was just plain awkward. We kept to our own sides of the room and didn't say a thing to each other. Just kept giving each other the odd glance now and then. She was moping. That much I knew. I half expected her to shout me out on the whole drugs thing. I doubted she liked that I threw her stash away. But she didn't. Surprisingly she was doing what I told her to do. Maybe Leanne was just one of those people who liked being bossed about. Maybe she didn't have a voice of her own without pennsatucky telling her what to think first. Whatever the reason I was glad for it. Not having to listen to bible quotes or talk to one of those damn meth heads was a blessing.

"I'm done with this" she told me after an hour of blissful silence.

I glanced up and was surprised at the table full of folded laundry in front of her. I nodded at the washers

"You cleaned them out too?"

She nodded. I was impressed. She must really want to get out of here. When I caught sight of her hands shaking I understood why. It must be drug o'clock.

I nodded, and then sighed when she didn't understand I was letting her leave.

"Go already" I sighed moving over to the back bench to start on the dorm bags. She practically ran out. I shook my head to myself. Junkies.

I stole a deep breath once she was gone and strode to the back shelf for a pen and some tags. When I turned back to the table I heard somebody walking into the room. I ignored them. It was probably leanne forgetting something. Or if I was lucky a guard to tell me I could leave too.

"Hello?" They called coming closer. I gripped the new sheet I was folding tighter in my frustration. Not a guard.

"Its closed" I called back at the girl hoping it would be the end of it.

"Alex?"

Shit.

Piper rounded the corner with a laundry bag in her hand. She shuffled nervously a moment. Uncertain whether to stay or go. I stayed quiet and carried on folding the sheet.

"I was just going to drop of this but…" I dropped the sheet and stood straight. She saw my reluctance to talk and she turned to go, "Tomorrow.."

I rolled my eyes, "Just give it" I told her holding my hand out. She turned back to me and I clicked my fingers at her, "Give it to me"

Piper nervously approached my table and stretched her hand over. I took the bag off her and picked up a tag. I quickly scribbled her name on it and then wrote a time receipt for her so she'd know when to pick it up. I laid the paper slip down on the table instead of handing it to her. I didn't want to touch her. I didn't trust myself enough to. I busied myself with writing out some other tags while she picked up her receipt. I wanted her to go. If I looked busy I hoped she wouldn't try small talk.

"D'you remember the four seasons in the Seychelles?"

Oh I hope too much these days.

I glanced up at her. She was smiling warmly with the memory. I didn't get it. Why was she suddenly wanting to reminisce? Pennsatucky's warning about Piper being nice until she got something ran through my mind. I hated that fucking hillbilly but she had a point. That was how Piper worked. I knew that. I just didn't get what she wanted this time.

I looked back down at the tag i was writing. I didn't want to remember anything with her. Piper let out a soft laugh

"God, we just threw our laundry into the hallway. It was like forty bucks for a pair of pants"

Yeah, forty bucks of my money. The money she resented me for. The money she was so happy to spend with me until she woke up and realised just where it came from and how she could use it as an excuse to back out of our relationship.

I held the pen painfully tight with my bitter thoughts. I gave her a cold look and dumped her bag into the basket with the others to be washed. I couldn't look at her. She was making me remember being with her and I didn't want to because I didn't want to think of her like that. She'd become someone I hated. I didn't want to let her slip back into somebody I loved. Because I knew I'd be the one who lost the game. I'd be the one who hurt. I always was.

Piper took my stone silence as a hint and turned to go. I let out a breath of relief and returned to my work. But she turned back before she made it to the door.

"Hey.." She started nervously. I looked up and braced myself for it. Slowly she walked back to me, "I've been thinking about it, a lot, and I just wanted to let you know that there're..um.. There are no hard feelings" I swallowed a snigger and smiled when she looked away. I knew she'd break first, "I was pretty mad but I'm over it... So, friends?"

I stared back at her. I was trying to figure out what she was after. Why the sudden change of heart? I mean, I threw her in this dump. I ruined her life. I stole it. She'd said it all herself. It had me paranoid really. I knew she'd break but not this quick. Still, if she was willing to be around me, talk to me, be a friend...

Man, I wanted that so bad. Everything in me had me screaming to nod my head and tell her yes, yes I'd be her friend. But I knew better. Piper was after something. And until I figured out what that was I wouldn't let her think she was the one who sealed our friendship. Not when she was the reason for it breaking apart in first place. Boil it down to basics, I was still pissed at her.

"Wow, that's really big of you, Pipes"

I didn't give her the answer she wanted. I just walked away with my trolley of laundry. I didn't look back at her but I bet she was confused. Maybe hurt. I hoped she was. She deserved it.

I heard her leave after a moment. I waited for the door to shut before I kicked the nearest washer hard. I was frustrated. And angry. And furious. With myself. If I'd just told her it was okay we'd be talking right now. I could tell her everything. She'd have listened this time. But now, because of my fucked up head and a little bit of guilt, I was back to square one. I kicked the washer again and froze when I heard something crack under my boot. I looked down and saw a panel had smashed under the kick I'd sent it. A weird noise was coming from the back of it, like electric crackling. I pressed the spin button but nothing happened. I groaned to myself.

Great. I'd broken it.

"Fucking great!"

"Yo!" I jumped and looked over my shoulder at Luescheck ambling into the back. He was clicking his fingers with closed eyes

"Hey um..What's your name? Uh.." He kept clicking trying to jog himself, "V..V.. Vase?"

"Vause" I mumbled moving away from the broken washer to a new one. I nudged the panel back in with my foot as I moved away from it. Hopefully he wouldn't notice.

"That's the one!" he flashed me a slurred smile and nodded his head out front, "You gotta go. There's some girlie thing going on and for some reason Healy said you all need to be there"

I frowned at him but didn't question it. If it got me out of work. I dumped the bag I had held in my hand and left the trolley where it was. He twisted himself around and walked out with me, teetering slightly as he went. I tried hard not to breathe with my nose. The dude fucking stank. We walked down the hall past the cafeteria and phones. Chanting was coming out of one of the large rec halls. Cheers of names and pizza for some reason.

He stopped by the door and nodded in. When I looked inside I saw pretty much everybody stood in a circle around the room. All up and ready with their wac campaigning. Looking at it it looked like an asylum room. Maybe Luescheck thought so too because he looked in and quickly backed away.

"Well, here we go. Have fun talking about makeup or whatever" He walked away and I watched him go before I walked into the room. Nicky found me straight away.

"Hey Stretch! How was laundry?"

"Boring. Whats going on?" I asked nodding to the centre of the room where the meth heads were squaring off to the black women. It looked like a face off.

Nicky grinned and grabbed hold of my wrist. She pulled me round the crowd to a good spot by norma and gina.

"Watch this" she said nodding at the centre of the room.

I moved my eyes towards tastey just as she stepped into the spotlight

"Oh, they call me Tastee cos…. My pussy be delicious, like an apple is nutritious-"

"Are they for real?" I asked Nicky pointing at the women as they rapped. Nicky laughed.

"Best kind of entertainment there is, huh?" she told me knocking my arm as leanne walked forward to throw down.

I laughed at the meth head's weak attempt to call the blacks out at their own game. The girl had no sense of style in the rap sense. I wondered if morello was going to get up and go for it too. I looked around for her but she was missing from the crowd

"Hey where's lorna?" i asked Nicky. She looked around a second before she shrugged uncaring

"Probably with Red"

"Is that allowed?"

"Its Red. Anything's allowed" she looked away and started to grin, "Oh shit! Here goes Poussey"

"She any good?" I asked watching the shorter woman stride forward. Nicky nodded

"Does an inmate shit without a door?" She said back rhetorically.

I just smiled at her and turned to listen to the rap off. I caught a glimpse of Tricia stood beside Pornstache as I did. She was talking to him but he wasn't listening. Was too busy playing his DS. She said something else and he glanced around at us all. I looked away. It didn't take a genius to know what they were doing. So thats where Leanne got her drugs from. I wondered if red knew.

"Hey Vause, you're missing the best bit!" Nicky shouted over the cheering.

I looked back at everybody moving back a few more steps. Somebody put some music on, loud so it echoed around the room. I felt my amusement heighten when they all started to dance. A rap off and a dance off? This was insane!

"Is this actually happening? Or did I die of detergent inhalation before?" Nicky laughed back at me and hopped on the spot

"Its happening stretch! C'mon, dance!"

I shook my head at her, "Oh no no no no. I don't dance"

"Everybody dances" She told me grinning. She held her hand out to me but it didn't take it. No way was I dancing with her.

"No, Nicky"

She shrugged back at me, "Your loss. Hey boo!" She walked out into the open space on the floor and started dancing with big boo. I couldn't stop laughing. Especially not when the larger woman grabbed Nicky by the waist and pulled her close.

"Hey, Alex" I looked down beside me and smiled at morello. Typical she'd show up the second Nicky left.

"Hey, shortie. Where've you been?"

"Oh, you know… Around. What's, uh.. What's Nicky doing?" Her eyes were trained on the redhead as she escaped Boo's clutches and started to dance about with tastee and the other girls. I smirked and hooked my arm around lorna's neck.

"Oh, you know… Dancing"

I winked at her when she looked up at me and she blushed a little. Her eyes darted down to the ground and I felt a little sorry for her. She was jealous. And confused. She felt that bad over hanging it all up with Nicky. I decided to help her out. I took her hand and twirled her around. She yelped in surprise.

"What're you doing, Alex?!"

I chuckled and pulled her against me. I made sure to look back at Nicky as I did.

As I expected she'd forgotten all about her dance with a cute Hispanic girl and was she watching me with an angry look. I winked at her and nodded her over. Lorna was trying to escape when she saw Nicky make her way over but I wouldn't let her leave.

"Lemme go!" she squealed. I shook my head at her

"You cant keep avoiding each other" I told her, she looked beside me at Gina and Norma but the two women both looked amused. I guess they were sick of their 'sisters' arguing too.

I let Lorna go when Nicky pulled up beside me.

"Hey Morello, I didn't know you could dance?" Nicky called over the music. She pressed her arm against my shoulder and leant on me.

"Oh well.. you know" she shrugged back and kept her eyes down. I glanced between the two of them and rolled my eyes.

"Fucking dance and make up already!" I barked annoyed.

They both jumped. Lorna raised her eyes back to Nicky, the redhead shrugged back. I looked down at Norma and Gina and they both nodded. They each grabbed a girl and pushed them together.

"Fix your shit, Nicky" Gina growled at them.

Nicky sighed and took Lorna's hand. She walked the girl to the corner of the room where they started talking fast.

I smiled happy and turned back to watch the dance off. Boo was right and centre throwing down confidently. Everybody was cheering her on as she pulled her shirt over her head.

Somebody knocked my arm and I looked down at Tricia shaking a little beside me. She wouldn't meet my eye but I knew what she was after.

"No" i told her turning my eyes back to boo as she pulled Chang out of the crowd to dance.

"C'mon man, you must know somebody"

I laughed back at her, "Do I look like I'm selling these days? Besides I'm not a dealer"

"Yeah you are, you said so in the meeting"

"Importer. I was an importer. Theres a difference" I turned away from her and heard her laugh bitterly.

"Yeah? They sound the same to me"

I ignored her and felt her shove past me. Gina took her place beside me and asked what we'd been talking about. I shrugged at her. I wasn't a snitch. Not until it was profitable to me anyhow.

Nicky came back around the same time Crazy Eyes started inching out of the crowd towards Boo who was dancing on the floor. The other girls were going crazy. The atmosphere in here was insane. It was like a concert or something. All we were missing was a stage and band.

"How'd it go?" I asked casually when Nicky began cheering crazy on. On the floor boo looked a little scared. Nicky looked back at me and shrugged.

"She's still engaged if that's what you mean"

"Man, do I know that problem" We locked eyes and laughed. Nicky nodded at me. She knew we were in the same boat.

The lights shut off suddenly and everybody hushed up. We all looked to the door where Healy was stood breathing heavy with his eyes locked on Boo and Crazy Eyes on the floor. Nobody was all that certain what to do.

"Are we supposed to lie down Mr Healy?" Tastee asked him.

His head snapped to the left and he glared at her. He turned the lights back on and called Mendez over. After a massive shouting at Mendez ordered us into the cafeteria for dinner. Healy pulled boo and crazy out of the line of girls being shepherd out and started to walk them down to Caputo's office. I frowned after them. What was with that guy? I asked Nicky and she let out a heavy breath

"Guy's a total homophobe" i blinked at her and she nodded, "Seriously, we cant even hug in this place without getting sent to the Shu by Healy"

"Is that why you-" She cut me off suddenly to pull Morello over to walk with us

"Eh Morello, we was just saying how Healy's probably gonna let Pennsatucky win WAC now. What with the fact he hates gays and all"

Morello gave her a bored look back, "Im engaged" was all she said as she walked further up the hall. Nicky sniggered after her

"Keep telling yourself that!" she called after Morello. I bumped her arm

"I thought you two sorted your shit?" i said giving her a stern look. Nicky grinned

"If I said yes, do i get a treat? Personally i wouldn't mind a little dance from Vause" she stepped closer but i shoved her back, "Okay, i get it, " she let go of a deep breath, "Me and morello are fine. We just need time"

"Good thing you have plenty of that left in here. Seriously nick, its getting awkward. Just let her go"

"Is that what you're doing with chapman, Alex? letting her go?" I looked up at her words. I refused to answer her. Nicky laughed at me. She knew as well as I did that I'd probably never let piper go. I couldn't.

I knocked her arm again and lead the way into the line for dinner. Nicky followed and accepted the tray i handed her. When we reached the serving counter we were surprised with the decent looking food being handed out to the white girls. We laughed at our luck and happily accepted it while the other minorities in the prison got given the shit prison food they got every day.

"Okay, so lorna running might not be a totally bad thing" I said as I sat down and dug into my food. Nicky nodded as she collapsed on the bench opposite me. She took one look at the food before she quickly started to shovel it into her mouth.

"Oh God!" I laughed reaching over to take hold of her wrist, "Slow down. Before you choke"

"Ah _fuph 'oo!_" she said back around her food. I chuckled when she pulled her arm back and i shook my head at her.

I looked around the room as I ate. The other women were all sat at their wac tables with their heads bowed together whispering about the winner to be. I rolled my eyes at them. How could they possibly think they could make a change in this place? The system was fucked.

"Trouble, twelve o'clock" Nicky managed to say around another forkful of food.

I looked back at her and met pipers nervous smile as she sat down directly opposite me. Lorna sat opposite Nicky but she didn't have any food. Piper followed my concerned eyes and gently smiled at me.

"She's nervous" she told us. Nicky scoffed.

"Hey can i sit here?"

I looked up. A tall skinny girl with short hair and blonde highlights was stood beside me. She nodded at the space between me and lorna. I nodded at her. I didn't know her name but I'd seen her around. Nicky got into conversation with her quick once she settled on the bench beside me. I kicked her leg under the table and nodded back at the girl. Nicky swallowed her water and pointed at me and piper

"This is Vause and Chapman. Girls this is Andrews"

She nodded at us, "Ali" She said waving at us.

"Hey" I mumbled turning back to my food.

Piper smiled at the woman and turned back to me. I kept playing with my food. I didn't want to talk to her right now. I was still torn between trusting her again and letting it go to be friends. I saw her hand tap the table before it slid forward a little to where my arm was leant against the table. Was she going to touch me? I kinda hoped she was.

"Hey, Al-" She got cut off by a CO announcement.

"_Attention. All maple syrup is now considered contraband after last week's incident. The winners of the WAC elections will be announced shortly. Thank you. Enjoy dinner! Hope it's scrumptious!_"

I smiled down at the table at fischers announcement on the pa. When i glanced up again piper was watching me still.

"Im real nervous" Morello whimpered. We looked back at her. She looked it. The girl was practically shaking in her seat.

"I thought the whole idea of Red endorsing you is that you're going to win?" Piper said with a frown. I swallowed down my smile and nodded with her.

"It is" Nicky told us, "She's just playing coy. It's a talent of hers"

Morello didn't throw anything back at her, just carried on wringing her hands nervously. Red walked up to the table with two plates in her hand. She laid them down in front of the two girls with a smile.

"I made Claudette's famous coconut cake in honor of our new WAC representative" She said nodding respectfully at lorna. Nicky looked ready to throw the plate back at the Russian.

She looked down at it angrily and said, "Should coconut be beige?"

Red looked back at her and gave her a steel glare she usually reserved for the rest of us. We all stared when she smacked nickys head hard and took the plate away "Fine. No cake for you, little girl, big mouth"

She walked off with it back to the kitchens. We watched her go. Nicky looked both shocked by what red had done and hurt.

"Tough love, I guess, huh?" I said retuning my eyes to the kitchen where red was glaring out at nickys back, "Jesus. I don't know how you deal with her"

Nicky didn't reply. Just looked down at the table far away in thought. She looked a little shamed. Red came back after a moment just as Healy's voice overode the pa. Everybody hushed up ready for the presidents to be announced. I scoffed around at their excited expressions. They honestly believed it would work. Man, i was living with idiots. He slowly went through the winners. Red slid around the table to stand behind lorna. Nickys eyes grew colder as red placed her hands on Lorna's shoulder. I nudged her foot with mine again, silently asking if she was okay. She looked away. Her eyes flicked between red and lorna and I guess she thought she was being replaced. She had nothing to worry about. Lorna might be one of reds daughters but it was easy to see Nicky was her favourite hands down.

"How's my hair?" Lorna asked patting it down with a shaking hand.

Nicky sighed and reached over to tuck a curl behind Lorna's ear. Her eyes turned soft as she did and she smiled at Morello encouragingly.

"You look great, kid. Don't worry"

"You're gonna be great" I added giving her a smile too. She nodded with a shakey smile of her own.

Healy announced the hispanic leader, the blacks, the golden girls. But when he came to us everybody was shocked.

"Chapman" He announced with a tone of smugness in his voice. The hall went silent. Everybody's eyes hit us. I glanced at piper, she looked just as shocked as the rest of us.

"But you didn't even run!" morello hissed angry. Behind her red was looking murderous. I met Nicky's eyes and sniggered with her.

"Uh.. i can.. i can explain.. see..." Red cut over piper by taking a sharp step behind me. Piper jumped in her seat terrified.

"i'd run now, kid" Nicky told her in a half serious voice. I glanced back at red over my shoulder. Nicky was right. Red looked pissed.

"How is it little princess is made wac leader above one of my daughters when little princess didn't run?" Red growled viciously.

Piper stuttered a reply and red took another impatient step forward. I rolled my eyes when she stuttered again and stood up. Obviously nobody else was going to stop her being killed.

"Okay red, cool it" I told her pushing her back, "Obviously Healy rigged the election"

"Rigged it?!" she repeated outraged, "Impossible!"

"Is it? I mean, you did it"

The entire cafeteria started whispering and red's glare dropped solely on me. She moved into my space with her usual scowl and hissed up at me

"I would be careful where you run that mouth of yours vause. One day you'll get in very big trouble"

"Wise words from a convict. Can I eat now?" Red pursed a lips and nodded

"Of course" She leant past me and grabbed Ali's water from her hand. Her smile returned to me as she poured it over my tray, ruining my food. She threw the cup at me and smiled again, "Enjoy dinner"

I watched her walk off. Morello was on her heels like a puppy. I threw the cup onto the table. It bounced against nicky's arm and hit me back in the leg. I sighed to myself and pushed my tray away. I was expecting a thanks sometime but it never came. I looked up and frowned at the empty space opposite me.

"Hey" i tapped nickys hand, "Where's piper?"

She grinned, "Goldilocks ran off while you were fighting her corner" she sniggered down at her tray and threw me a grin, "Honestly, vause, she is not worth the shit you go through for her"

I nodded even though i wasnt listening and i stood up. Her eyes followed me and she frowned in a silent request to know where i was going. I pointed my thumb over my shoulder at the door. I was going to go find the blonde that had cost me my meal. Nicky was grinning amused as I turned away. I bet she was real pleased. Not only had lorna failed to usurp her but she'd gotten some fine dinner entertainment too. If only we were all that easy to please.

I dumped my tray and walked up to the door. I was hesitant about leaving after last time. Lucky for me Bennett was on duty. He gently stepped aside to let me go and even told me where piper had gone. I wondered if he favoured our rumoured relationship. Maybe he sympathised. Love was hard in prison. He should know.

I rounded the corner for Healy's office, knowing that piper would have bolted there to have it out with him. The door was slightly ajar as i approached and i could hear Healy's southern voice trying to calm piper's hysteria down. I leant up against the wall beside the door and leant close to listen to them. They were arguing over the wac results. Arguing over his intervention. I frowned as i listened. Piper hadn't wanted to be the leader? I would have had that right up her street really. She loved bossing people about and pretending it was for the good of everybody else.

_"Mr Healy, i honestly dont think this is going to end well! Red already wants to kill me!"_

He laughed and i heard a chair squeal with the weight being fixed on it,_ "Chapman, nobody will kill you. Look at it as experience. You wanted to get your thoughts to the board, I've got you a seat at the table. The others will get over it in a couple days"_

_"Mr Healy, its not-"_

"_You're the wac leader, chapman. Thats all there is to it. Now if you'll excuse me"_

I leant back as the door was pushed open. Piper exited the room a couple seconds later looking pale and worried. I laughed. Always taking things to the extreme.

"You owe me dinner" I said looking down at my nails when she stopped beside me.

"What?"

I looked up at her and gave her a blank look, "Dinner. Shall we say five o'clock in your bunk?" Piper blinked bemused and I cracked a smile, "Im kidding, pipes. Honestly though, you cost me my meal. Fucking Red poured water on it"

"Sorry" she mumbled, "But you know, you didn't have to stand up for me"

I stared at her and laughed, "Right, because you were doing such a great job of it yourself?"

"I had it covered" she said curtly. I gave her a smile and raised my eyebrows. She broke into a little grin and nodded

"okay, maybe I didn't" she conceded taking a place beside me. She looked up at the ceiling and sighed, "Im fucked, arent i?"

"Oh totally. But there is some good in all this"

"And whats that?"

"Red hasn't killed you. Yet" I answered teasingly. Pipers expression dropped.

She knocked my arm, "Stop it"

I chuckled and knocked her arm back with a smile when she grinned down at our hands just touching. I looked down too and caught both our fingers twitching a little. I wanted to take her hand. She looked like she wanted to take mine. I wanted to scream with the frustration of it all. Why could this never be easy? Piper glanced up at me and tugged on my sleeve.

"C'mon" She said walking off. I followed her.

"What are we doing?" i asked as she lead me to the commissary. Chang wasn't sat in her usual spot behind the gate but O'niel was. He stopped slurping on his smoothie when he saw us and sat up a little straighter in the chair.

"Yeah?" He asked picking up a pencil.

Piper looked back at me before she ordered two pot noodles. I blinked at her and smiled while he twisted round to find them. He handed them over to her and pencilled the tab onto pipers account. I pressed a hand to my heart when she handed me one.

"Dinner, and you paid. Wow! This new piper really is something"

Piper laughed, "Shut up. The only reason you used to pay all the time is because you never let me"

"And you were broke" i pointed out. Piper shrugged

"And that. I guess" she looked around the hall and sighed, "Who'd have guessed i'd be more richer now being in prison than i was back then, huh"

I rolled my eyes and tapped her head with the noodle pot, "Quit moping. It suits you too much"

"What? Im not moping" I arched a brow at her, "Im not! Im just saying.."

I looked down at the pot in my hand and shook my head at her. I glanced back up and moved my glasses back up my nose with a smile for her. She narrowed her eyes suspiciously at me.

"What?"

"Nothing, just…" I let my fingers move a little closer to her and brushed them against the back of her hand, "I've kinda never felt richer than right now"

Her eyes moved up from our hands to my eyes. Staring into them I felt my heart burn a little inside my chest. It was humming happy under her watch. She looked both confused and moved by what i said. And it embarrassed me. I felt my face grown hot while she thought her reply. In the end she didn't give one. Just moved her hand away suddenly and nodded down the hall.

"I should.. I should probably get going.. It's count time soon so.."

I nodded and raised my noodles, "Thanks for dinner" She shrugged and started walking.

I called after her, "I look forward to our next date!" She raised her finger up at me over her shoulder as she walked.

I chuckled and turned back to walk towards my own rooms. I thought over what just happened. In the space of ten minutes we'd gotten along. We'd actually worked the whole friends thing. We'd even played around a little. Maybe we could work it out.

Or maybe I was getting my hopes up again.


	8. Chapter 8

**_Hey guys and gals! I redid the chapter. Sometimes when you write these things they look good but then you get it on here and you read it in its last platform and you're like, wtf?! So yeah, I read through it and realised I'd accidentally blended two episodes when I didn't want to and I saw some parts weren't needed. So I rewrote some bits. I also changed the song. Its now; 99 Problems by Hugo. The previous song was meant for another chapter (oops). Happy readings :) _**

* * *

Everybody was sick. Some flu or something. Those who'd gone down with it had been told to stay in bed. The rest of us had work to get to. And here, just another example of the administration lacking power, girls everywhere spreading their fucked flu. Man, I hated prison.

"Why the fuck cant these women stay in their beds?" I growled shoving another girl away from me before she could get her snot on me.

Nicky chuckled back at me and grabbed my arm to pull me out of the way of a group of girls headed in our direction. I hated this. Knowing my luck i'd be sick before the week was out. And all because none of these bitches knew about hygiene.

"God!" I gasped watching one woman sneeze straight out mid sentence, spraying her friend with it. I turned back to Nicky when she laughed at my disgust, "How the fuck can you just stand there and laugh? This is gross!"

"Yeah, well, thats prison baby" I rolled my eyes and she sniggered again. "Hey, you hungry? Only we gotta buy breakfast on a count of the kitchen crew being wiped by the great prison epidemic"

I groaned, "Great. Nothing says monday better than noodles for breakfast"

Nicky chuckled, "Its like being at home!"

I smiled at her, "Well, its gotta be better than waiting for one of these bitches to sneeze on me"

"But I thought you like girls sneezing on you?" I shoved her and she hit the wall with a laugh, "Okay okay, calm down chief"

We started to walk towards the commissary line. Nicky even started up her usual game of Who Would You Rather. I played along while we waited for the few girls ahead of us. It took my mind of all the plagued girls standing around me.

"Okay," I hummed thinking up a bad one for her just to stop her laughing, "Laura Bush, but you gotta fuck George too, or Martha Stewart during her prison years, and she's got syphilis" Nicky looked grossed and I laughed, "Hey, you gotta fuck one of them"

Nicky's eyes twinkled amused. She looked pretty bummed with the choices I'd given her but I didn't blame her. I smirked back waiting. But instead of answering Nicky walked straight up to the cage and ordered us some cheap food. Which for Nichols consisted of nuts and a mars bar. I laughed at her reluctance to play all of a sudden and stood patiently for her. I watched O'Niel in the cage behind Chang. He had a cup in his hand and he was stirring a spoon around inside it. I wondered what it was.

Nicky took our food and handed it to me before she turned back and asked chang about cold medication. Chang looked beside her a moment at O'Niel, but he was too engrossed in stirring tea to care much for their conversation.

"No idea what you talk about" she said nodding at us despite telling us she didn't have anything. Nicky was nodding slowly with Chang while I watched O'Niel stirring.

"What is that?" I asked him. He looked down at it and then back at Chang.

"Herbal tea!" she said smiling, "Good for flu"

I frowned at the murky steam, "What's in it?"

"Secret recipe" she told me sharply.

"Looks like toilet water" Nicky commented just as O'Niel took a sip. He gagged on it and quickly put the cup down. Chang waved her hand dismissively.

"Toilet water only one ingredient"

Everybody stared back at her.

"Are you fucking kidding?" We all asked together. Chang nodded with another smile. I couldn't tell wether she was joking or not. Behind her O'Niel was wretching.

"I'm gonna throw up!" he rushed out the gate and around us. Nicky watched him run down the hall with a grin.

"Eh, look at that, he can run!" she turned back to Chang and leant against the counter, "Was there actual toilet water in that?"

Chang leant back, "Old family secret. No share"

"Serious?" Chang nodded and Nicky glanced back at me with this look that asked if the old lady was mad. I shrugged back. I had no idea.

"So.." Nicky turned back to Chang and smiled, "Cold meds?"

Chang nodded and reached under her counter for a little container. She pulled out a tiny bottle and tucked it slyly into Nicky's palm. Then Nicky turned and tugged my arm to make me walk.

"What was the point of all that?" I asked as we turned away from the cage.

Nicky tucked the bottle into her shirt pocket and grinned. She patted her pocket, "This, is a precaution. Now gimme them nuts!" She snatched them out of my hands and ripped them open. I laughed at her.

"Anybody ever tell you you eat like an animal?"

Nicky threw a nut at me, "Nobody else ever complained" She licked her teeth and winked at me. I just shook my head and smiled.

We walked over to the rec room hoping it'd be open so we could sit down but it'd been locked to keep the inmates in their rooms. Nicky kicked the door annoyed and wandered off towards the stairs. We sat down and watched the other prisoners shuffle dizzily past with their sneezing. Nicky looked around at it all undisturbed. Me, I found it all horrible.

"Am I ever gonna get to hear this story?" She asked suddenly beside me. I peered back at her confused and took my glasses off.

"What story?"

"The one concerning a certain friend of yours and a pork chop.." I looked away annoyed and Nicky laughed, "Hey I can keep on thinking what I'm thinking but something tells me you'd rather I knew what really happened. Besides, would you rather go work with the hicks?"

I shrugged. She had a point there.

"Okay. You win" Nicky clapped happy and sat up straight to listen. I let out a deep breath, "See, we were-"

"Vause! Nichols!"

Bell was walking over to us. She looked all pale and sick. Which meant her mood was at super bitch level. She stopped in front of the stairs and looked down at us confused,

"The fuck you doing sitting around on the stairs? Get your asses to work!"

"We're talking here" Nicky told her tapping me again to carry on. I hesitated though. Bell was already on my case. And she looked pretty pissed. She looked down at me all threateningly. Her hand twitched away from her hip towards the notepad and pen on her belt.

"Sorry, Nick" I told her giving her an apologetic smile, "Some other time"

I got up and walked around Bell. Behind me Nicky groaned annoyed and hopped up too.

"You got serious bad timing, you know?" I heard her tell the other woman. I just smiled to myself and made my way to the laundry rooms.

When I entered the place was empty. And only two machines were on. I frowned. Was everybody else sick? Could I actually hope that I was alone to work for once?

"Anybody here?" I called.

"Well if it ain't the poster girl for team gay" I let out an angry breath and forced myself to walk around the corner to where pennsatucky was set up working alone. She smirked in greeting at me, "Looks like its just you and me, Vause. E'rybody else is sick"

"You're kidding me"

"Nope"

I kicked a table leg in frustration. Why the fuck was it always me?!

Pensatucky sniggered and threw a wash bag at me. I caught it and slammed it down on the table. She pointed at it.

"Get to work"

* * *

"Hey" I looked up and clocked Nicky swagging in with Piper following close behind her.

"Hey"

"Hear you got a broken appliance, ma'am" I looked up at her again. Nicky was smiling waiting for me to go with it. I glanced back at Piper's expression.

"Yeah?"

"A real rusty old thing that needs fixing?" Nicky winked at me to join in. I smiled and decided to hell with playing cool. I held the sheet I was folding up to my waist like a skirt and looked up at Nicky with a flirty smile,

"Oh, well, my husband isn't home," I said in a high southern accent that matched the one she'd been putting on, "He's got the check book. Hopefully there's some way I could pay you?"

Behind Nicky Piper was shuffling a little awkwardly on the spot. She obviously didn't know what to make of our little exchange. Maybe that's why Nicky was messing about. I certainly was getting a lot out of it. I could tell she was getting jealous again.

"Well, I have been feeling a little tense lately" Nicky said gruffly rolling her neck, "Maybe if I stick my dick in your mouth, it might help me relax"

"Oh, God!" I laughed and threw the sheet down on the table, "No, thanks"

"What?" Nicky asked breaking character. She looked behind her at Piper, "Too hetero?" _Duh_, "Okay. How about.. "wrench in your twat"?"

"All right. Well, the broken one's over there, and her name's Myra. So you can stick your wrench in her twat"

Nicky snickered and I smiled. Piper looked a little lost with what to do. Her eyes moved to the corner of the room to the dryers. Obviously she wanted to go and work but Nicky wanted to stay and mess around some more. I was about to ask them if any more of their other electric pals were gonna show up when something hit the table by my hand.

We all looked down at it then back at Norma when she threw more candies at Nicky's head. The redhead growled annoyed under her breath. Looks like Red wanted her.

"I hate when she sends 'The Quiet Storm'"

"Can't she just come over and tap you on the shoulder?" I asked watching Norma throw some more candies at Nicky.

Nicky shook her head and undid the tool belt on her waist.

"She has an irrational fear of the spin cycle. Won't step foot in here. I'd better go" she dumped the belt into Piper's hands and walked off.

"Yeah, well Mommy needs you" I mumbled going back to my folding.

"Can't be that serious" Nicky called back, "When it's serious, she throws coconuts" she sighed and waved at Norma to move.

The two exited the room leaving me alone with Piper. I watched her a moment. She looked pretty good with a set of tools to hand. I got a sudden flashback of the times before when she'd had experiments with DIY and I had to look away when it made me smile too much.

Piper put her books down on my table and clipped the belt on. I smiled to myself and picked up a few sheets to take back to the shelf.

"You don't look half bad in those" I told her stopping beside her.

She looked up at me with this slight smirk. It didn't last long though. She grabbed her books and walked off with a short thanks.

I chuckled after her, "You sure you know what you're doing?" I called.

She ignored me and walked off to the dryers, stopping suddenly to avoid walking into pensatucky. The hick's eyes were glued to Piper hatefully. She watched the blonde approach the dryers and she watched me nod at Piper when she looked back and pointed to the dryer closest to her, silently asking if it was the broken one. Pensatucky shook her head at us and walked over to the tagging table with a load, watching us closely as she worked.

I ignored her, and Piper, and went back to my own work load, glancing back at Piper and her cute frown every now and then as she studied the dryer and worked out how to fix it.

"Hey college," Pennsatucky called after a while. Piper glanced back at her, "What you been saying with Healy lately? Y'know we all been wondering why none of our requests have been dealt with. We're starting to think maybe our wac representative ain't pulling her weight"

"Oh. Well, like I said to you the other-" Pensatucky spoke loudly over her

"You even telling him our thoughts, college?"

"Yes, but it's not-"

"Maybe we need a recount. Get somebody who can actually do the job to stand up"

"Like you, you mean" I cut in giving her a strong look to get her to shut up. Her attention shot back to me and she glared meanly at me.

"Something wrong with that, stretch?"

"Yes. Everything"

"You don't know what you're talking about. If Healy hadn't rigged that election so this bitch won-"

I laughed at her and she threw her pen down.

"What's so funny?!"

I didn't reply. Just went back to my work, leaving my silence to anger her further. Pensatucky glanced between us and muttered under her breath. Piper glanced back at me with an amused light twinkling in her eyes, almost as if she was saying thanks for sticking up for her. Again. I winked back at her and returned to folding when she span back around to focus on her studying. I kept smiling to myself. If only the hillbilly wasn't here.

We all went back our separate jobs. None of us talking to the others. The room filled with an ambient quiet with only the sounds of the machines and Pennsatucky a constant damning whispers to occupy it. It was nice. In a way I felt close to piper. Even though I was on the other side of the room. I kept finding myself watching her. I was intrigued by every little thing she did. Whether it was staring down at the book she was reading or flicking her hair out of her eyes so she could assess the damage to the dryer. I found it all fascinating.

A loud beep cut through my daydream and I sighed silently to myself. I gave pensatucky another strong look and walked around to the washers to grab the new load. I didn't like leaving her alone with Piper. Not after all the shit rants I'd been forced to listen to concerning her. I kept my ears strained on the other room as I hauled the laundry out of the washer and into my basket. I could hear Pensatucky talking but Piper wasn't talking back. Maybe she thought she was better than that. Maybe she was just waiting for me to come back. I crept closer to the fence and listened.

_"What's the deal, college? You and Vause?_" Piper didn't say anything and Pensatucky scoffed, _"Oh now she's quiet. You know you're sick. You both are. Ain't no place in heaven for freaks like you. Even if you say you're engaged"_

I glared down at the floor and took a step into the other room to button that hicks mouth. No way would I let her talk that shit to Piper. But Piper beat me to it. I rounded the corner with my load just as Piper rose from her crouched position by the dryer with a mean look and a spanner in her hand. I leant back against the fence and smirked. This looked like it was going to be good.

"_You know I can't help that Healy picked me to talk to about the women's problems in this prison. Maybe for some crazy reason I just seem sane to him. I can't help that I liked girls a long time ago. I can't help whatever shit Alex has said to make you all inquisitive about us. Just like I can't help all that bible nonsense you keep spouting. Okay? I can't help it. So why don't you back the fuck off and shut the fuck up before I fix your face with a wrench"_

_Whoa.. _

Pensatucky looked surprised by Piper's outburst. Like she never expected her to fly off the handle and fight back. But I did. I knew Piper. Piper gave her a questioning look, daring her to say something. Pensatucky's eyes drifted and met mine. I threw her the same daring look Piper had and she gave up and went back work. Piper let out a deep breath and turned back to the dryer. I smirked at her back and walked around to the dryers beside her to sort through my load. I felt Pensatucky's eyes on us as I opened the machine. She'd be speculating the entire thing. No doubt about it. But I ignored her and got back to playing the good laundry worker.

My thoughts unsurprisingly landed on Piper while my hands sifted through the wet clothes. I was thinking about her front up with 'tucky. About how fierce she still got. I'd missed seeing her like that.

I realised I was smiling like a dork and looked down at my hands. They were wrapped around a pair of boxers. Familiar boxers. I frowned a second and realised. This was Bell's laundry. I curiously peeled the waistband back and noticed the new name tag. I snorted when I read it.

Beside me Piper yelped at the exact same time I laughed. She'd forgotten to turn the power off to the machine. I glanced back at her to make sure she was okay before I went back to my quiet laughter.

"I look pathetic. I'm aware" she said slowly in anger. I tilted my head a little and smirked.

"I wasn't laughing at you" I told her. She didn't buy it though.

"Right.." She said sarcastically. I could feel her step away back to her hate Alex line so I decided to make nothing off it.

"Anyway, significantly less funny than the time you fixed our toaster with a hot glue gun" She looked back at me and slowly smiled with the memory, I chuckled, "You wanna see something?"

"What?" She asked turning to face me fully. I walked over to her.

"Okay, so we don't just do inmate laundry, right? Right. Some of the guards drop off their clothes, too" She nodded, "So, Wanda Bell? You might remember her as the bloodsucking dragon-cunt? She works up front, eats souls for fun? Every once in a while, we find a pair of men's boxers in there"

I held them up and Piper looked surprised, I smiled,

"No big deal. Even Bigfoot's gonna get laid sometimes. Except these boxers have a name stitched on them like he's a third grader" I twisted the waist band so she'd see, "S.O'Neill"

Piper gasped and touched my wrist, " No! The guard, S.O'Neill?"

I grinned back at her, "Drama!" I sang giggling with her. Piper took the boxers off me and looked them over stunned

"Where does that belly go?!"

"I don't know!" I laughed happily.

"Hey!" We looked over at Pensatucky, "Y'all done having fun?"

Piper hushed up and passed me the boxers. I took them off her and gave Pensatucky a firm look of irritation.

"We're just getting started, bitch"

She looked ready to throw something back as she walked off with a trolley. I carefully watched her go. I didn't trust that look she gave us. Piper interrupted my paranoia by moving away from me.

"I should finish fixing that" she mumbled.

"You want some help?" I asked eyes still on the hick's back.

"No, that's really okay"

"I work these machines all day" I argued hoping she'd accept the offer. Any excuse to keep talking to her. Piper shook her head.

"I saw Little Sarah get a shot for helping Nicky hold a ladder"

"So?"

"You're laundry, I'm electric. We're from different worlds" I met her eyes and knew she meant two things there. I let out a breath, "And I don't want any trouble" she carried on looking back at the space 'tucky had just vacated. I scoffed.

"Oh, fuck her! I'm gonna help you" I took my glasses off my head and put them gently back on, "No strings attached"

Piper bit her lip hesitant before she accepted that I was going nowhere. She nodded in resignation and waved her hand at the dryer. I smiled gently at her and approached it. She was running her eyes over it, trying to figure out the problem. I coughed and nudged my foot against the panelling I'd broken on it a couple days ago. We looked down when it fell to the floor with a metallic clatter.

"I guess that's where it broke?" I asked pointing down at it innocently. Piper hummed thoughtful and crouched to examine it. She shook her head.

"It's an electrical problem"

"I figured when they sent you to fix it" I teased crouching beside her.

She half smiled and blindly reached back behind her for one of her books. I pulled her hand down and grabbed it myself. I pressed it into her hands and smiled when she smiled at me. She opened it back to the page she'd been on and scanned it. Her brow creased up.

"What?" I asked.

"The circuit board I have to look at..."

"Don't tell me, it's behind it?" The machine weighed a tonne. No way could we pull it forward to look. And the guards would never help.

Piper shook her head and I frowned. That was the worst case scenario right?

"What?" I asked annoyed.

She met my eyes and stood up. I followed suit and turned my eyes to the dryer door she was staring at.

"It's in there" she mumbled. I rolled my eyes. Perfect.

Piper took a deep breath and twisted back to me. She handed me the book and grabbed hold of the dryer door. I grabbed her hand to stop her opening it.

"You're not going in there" I told her strongly.

"I've got to fix it, Alex"

"Then let me do it" She stared at me and shook her head.

"No. It's my job. You've already helped. I can take it from here"

"I said I'd help you fix it. It's not fixed" She sighed, "Piper you're not getting in there"

"I'm the smallest so I should"

"So? You have no idea what you're doing. I've fixed it before" I lied pulling her out of the way so I could open the door myself. I leant over it to peer in at the dark space and swallowed. I fucking hated closed spaces. And Piper knew that.

I felt her fingers brush my hand before she took hold of it. I looked over my shoulder to make sure 'tucky was still reloading the washers before I let myself squeeze her hand back.

"Okay," she said taking her hand back so she could wave at the dryer.

I walked around her and leant my hands against the door rim, peering in at the shiny back panel. I took a deep breath and told myself to climb in.

Piper held the door open and stopped the spin sheet from moving as I hauled myself into the small space. The darkness crept around me and made me breathe deeper with panic.

"I'm just gonna get my torch" piper told me gently.

I nodded despite my struggle to breathe right. Something touched my shoulder and I jumped startled. I met her eyes and realised she'd just reached a hand in to give me some reassurance. I gave her a weak smile to say I was fine.

"Are you sure about this?" She asked seeing me look around nervous. I nodded. I had to be, right.

"This is nothing. You should see the box Fahri got me in once"

Piper didn't buy it but she didn't say anything either. Maybe mentioning Fahri wasn't the best idea. She let go of me and turned to the table for her torch. I let out a steadying breath when her back was turned and told myself to chill out.

"And here we go" she said turning it on an shining it into the dryer. I felt better the second it lit up my confined space. Knowing what was around me made it less tight in here.

"Okay, the book says its at the back.."

"I know, I've done it before, right"

Piper looked up from the page and nodded for me to go ahead. I mentally swore at myself and twisted back to the back of the dryer. I had no fucking clue what I was doing. Winging it I guess.

I stretched my hand up and felt along the cold groves in the metal for a panel or something.

"Found it?" She asked in a bored voice. My mouth twisted with irritation.

"I would if I could see" I mumbled back.

She raised the torch and I noticed a cut in the metal. I gripped it with my fingers and gently pulled. I turned back to her with a smug smile

"One control panel cover" I said handing it to her. She took it silently. I turned back round with a little smile.

"Hey, uh.." She sounded like she was going to start a serious conversation but changed her mind, "Okay, so be careful"

"Relax" I told her feeling for the panel again and turning back to face her, "I do this all the time. Why? Because it's fucked up. And when you work with geniuses like I do, the motor gets stuck all the time"

I went back to facing the wall and let my eyes focus on the dim light bouncing on the metal while my hand touched the soldered bumps on the control board.

"Did you find it?" She asked.

"I don't know. I need a little more light back here"

"Okay" she raised the torch, "How about that?"

I nodded, "Better"

"Okay. So, it looks like the safety lock is connected with a blue wire to something back there that's got, like, two screws sticking right out of it. And it's right next to this T-shaped thing.."

I smiled at her shit explanation and pictured her expression right now. I bet she was staring at the book with a cute frown as she tried to understand the diagrams. I was tempted to look behind me to see for myself. Instead I focused on fixing the dryer.

The light flickered just as I got my hand around the front shelf of the motor. I looked down when it went out. My fingers were still searching while I waited for the light to come back,

"Oh, damn it!" Piper gasped smacking her hand against the torch, " Shit! I have to get more batteries"

I heard her footsteps and my head shot up in panic. She was just leaving me in here? I glanced back over my shoulder and the movement made my glasses swing off.

"Fuck!" I growled patting the floor of the dryer, "My glasses fell off"

"I'll be right back" Piper called from outside. I sighed and reached up for the motor again, using whatever light I had from outside.

"I think I can reach it if I could just angle my fucking hand back there"

The door of the dryer whined with movement and I heard a loud click. I span around and saw it closed. I immediately pulled my glasses back on and looked up in time for Pennsatucky to lean down with something that looked suspiciously like the control buttons slung over her shoulder. I stared up at her.

"What the hell are you doing?!"

"Who, me?" She asked pointing at herself before she leant closer "I'm just getting started, bitch"

She winked and patted the door window before strutting off. I stared after her a second before I went for the door. It wouldn't open from the inside, I knew that, but I was fucking terrified of being stuck in here.

In my rising panic I started hitting at the window. I even leant back to kick the glass but it didn't shatter like I begged it to.

I gave up and sat breathing heavy. I could feel a panic attack coming on.

"Fuck me"

I gave the window another kick and let myself sink back against the wall. The cold metal pressed into my back and chilled my skin. I shivered and closed my eyes. I started slowly counting aloud between sharp breaths to try and trick myself into calming down. I didn't want to have a panic attack in here. I focused on my breathing, letting the sound of my breath growing sharper and sharper direct my thoughts away from the dryer and how I was stuck here to something else. Anything else.

* * *

_I was looking down at the sea pushing calmly against the cliff edge. The soft Indonesian breeze tickled my neck while I watched it. My hands shook a little at my sides while my eyes followed the blue waves into the narrow slip of rock I'd be swimming into. It looked way too tight. No way could anything but water get in there. No freaking way. My chest was rising and dropping quick with how nervous I was feeling. I knew I couldn't do this. _

_"Alex?" _

_Fingers slipped between mine and squeezed my hand. I swallowed and let my eyes move up and over my shoulder. Piper was looking at me concerned. _

_"Are you okay?" She asked tucking my hair back behind my ear. I forced myself to nod at her _

_"Sure" _

_She smiled at me then and approached the cliff edge. I had to stop myself from yanking her back. I watched her angle herself into position so she could dive right without hurting herself. _

_"Al?" _

_"Yeah?"_

_"I'm gonna need my hand" I looked down and realised I was still holding it tight. I let go and piper turned back to me, "seriously Alex, are you okay with this? Because we can do something else" _

_I shook my head at her. She'd always wanted to do this. She'd had her heart set on it. Her bucket list thing to do in Bali. No way was I going to fuck it up for her. _

_"I'm fine, babe" she gave me a doubtful look and I laughed, "Honestly, you think a little water scares me?" _

_"Maybe it's not the water that's the problem.." She held her hand out to me and I took it. Piper slowly pulled me over to her and I felt myself tense slightly the closer to the edge I got. Her eyes narrowed at me suspiciously but she let it go. _

_"We're jumping down and swimming to that cave there," she pointed to the tiny crack in the cliff and I nodded, "Then we gotta dive through a few pools and climb-"_

_"Whoa, hang on! You said it was one dive and a swim. Where the fuck has all the rest of this shit come from?" _

_"Well, you want to explore right?" _

_I sighed and stared down at the cave, "Right.," _

_Piper kissed my cheek and I hated how I smiled at it. Right now I wanted to stay mad. It kept me calm feeling that way. I had control in the anger. _

_Piper inched a little more to the cliff edge, half her feet hanging off it. I stepped up beside her and heard my heart pound loudly in my ears. Piper squeezed hand and looked ahead of her with a smile. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. I watched her, fascinated with the volume of peace passing over her. _

_"Ready for this?" She asked bending her knees._

_ I looked back at the cave and swallowed. I fucking hated closed spaces and fuck knows how bad it was in there. But with Piper there? I knew I could do it. _

_I nodded at her and tightened my hold on her hand. She squeezed me back and counted down. _

_I stole a deep breath and leapt forward at the same time she did. I heard piper's scream blend with my own before the crash of the water swallowed me up_

* * *

I opened my eyes. I was still in the dryer. I was still trapped. I was always fucking trapped. I let out a hopeless whimper and kicked the door again.

"Hello?"

My head snapped up and I quickly sat up. Piper was walking back to me, looking around herself confused. She couldn't see me.

"Hey!" I tapped the glass and she looked down. Her eyes widened.

"Oh, my God...Alex?!"

"Get me out of here!" I told her in a scared voice.

"What?" She went for the door and stared back at me shocked when it wouldn't open, "It's locked" she tried again and looked back at me, "Are you okay?"

"No!"

I saw a little panic hit her eyes and she looked around for help. She stretched up to the main buttons. I swallowed and focused on what she was doing. Her hand rose to sweep into the now empty space that'd once held all the buttons.

"Maybe I can, uh.." She gave up and turned back to me, "What the hell happened?"

"It was that fucking meth-head!"

"Seriously?"

"Yes!" I snapped. I was annoyed she didn't seem to believe me.

"I'm gonna go get help"

"No, no, no! Just open the door. If they find out that I was helping you, I'm gonna get in trouble. You said so yourself"

"You offered!" she argued and I stared at her.

"Are you serious?" Was she honestly doing the I told you so right now?!

"I told you that this was a bad idea" I whacked the door when she pissed me off, "I did!"

"Don't you do that!" I snapped at her. She looked confused.

"Do what?" She asked innocent.

I pointed at her, "That thing. Like this is my fault"

"You know what I mean" she said softly. I laughed.

"Like you aren't accountable for anything that ever happens in your life, ever!"

"Am I supposed to tell them that I made you get into the dryer?" She snapped angrily.

"No, I want you to get me out! Read that manual, unjam the door, step the fuck up!"

Piper looked back at me quiet a moment before she turned and left.

I panicked "Wait, Piper, where are you going?" I called hoping she was still in the room. I didn't know what would happen if she wasn't. I could feel my chest grow tight again while my vision blurred. Lucky she was still here.

"I'm just gonna go-"

"No! Don't you go!" I took a few hitched breaths and held my fists tight to stop myself from crying with my fear, "Don't you fucking leave me!"

I waited. But nobody replied. I was on my own.

I couldn't breathe. I could only hear the sounds of the washers beside mine and my own heart drumming inside me. I stared up at the lights on the ceiling to keep myself from freaking out. It helped a little.

"Okay" I heard softly.

"Okay, what?" I asked keeping my eyes glued to the lights.

I heard footsteps slowly approach me. Piper came back into view looking at me gently. I met her eyes and saw the blue swimming guiltily. Maybe she thought I was freaking out. I kind of was.

"I'm here" She said it so reassuringly. I could probably hint at her thoughts. Her face said it all. She was thinking about the last time I begged her not to leave me.

She looked down at me almost pityingly and I couldn't take it. I looked away and fidgeted with my glasses to avoid looking at her. It was probably obvious but I was trying not to think about it too.

"So.. How do we get you out?" She asked herself. I looked up when she stood straight. My eyes followed the flick of her hands as she rested them on her hips and looked down at me and the dryer. I shrugged.

"I don't know"

"Maybe we could break the glass?" She suggested hopefully.

"Don't you think I've tried that?" I snapped irritably.

"Sorry" she mumbled. I let out a long deep breath and told myself to calm down.

Piper grabbed one of her books and crouched beside me on the floor. She propped the book against her left knee and began skimming through the pages. I watched her closely as she did, saw the panic rising in her otherwise calm expression. She looked lost. I wanted to groan. I wasn't getting out of here.

"Okay.." She tapped the page, "This says there's an override on the top control board"

"Except Pensatucky ripped that out" I reminded. Piper sighed and shut the book. Her eyes flickered to the left towards the door and I knew she was thinking about going for help. I tapped the glass and pointed down when she looked back at me

"Those are nuts on the door, right?" Piper didn't look like she understood. I sat up a little and pointed at the corner of the window.

"They should untwist" I said. Again she looked clueless. I rolled my eyes.

"Piper, cmon!"

She looked away and at the door again before it clicked.

"Oh! You want me to-"

"Yes!" I cried slumping back annoyed, "Jesus"

"Sorry" she mumbled leaning forward to inspect the door. I let out a long breath and cursed myself.

"No, pipes.. Look, I'm sorry. I just- .. You know I hate this"

She hummed thoughtfully and reached down to her tool belt. Her fingers patted against an empty hoop and she looked down.

"Shit! I don't have the larger spanner"

"You have a wrench, numbskull" I pointed out. She looked down at it on the table and slowly nodded.

"Right, but I don't think it'll-"

"Pipes, please, don't think. Just do"

"I'm just.. Do you wanna get out of there?" I held in my smile and nodded, "Then shut up with the orders"

She pulled the belt off, picked up the wrench and knelt beside me. I pressed my head against the glass and breathed slowly. We didn't say anything for a long time. Just stayed in an awkward silence. It had me thinking about how much of a dick I'd been. I sighed. Why did I always seem to close to Piper and at the same time so far? No matter what I did it just felt like I couldn't make it right.

I watched her a moment. I thought about the other day when she'd thrown that memory at me. She'd seemed pretty happy talking about it. It made me wonder if she'd talk if I showed I wanted to talk about it too. I guess there was no harm in trying.

"Pipes?"

"Yeah?" She asked twisting the wrench around the top nut on the door hinge. I smiled and inched a little closer to her.

"D'you remember when we were in Paris and you broke the lamp by the bed?" She didn't reply just kept working. I smiled and carried on, "You felt so bad even though I said I'd pay for it. You even tried gluing it, with superglue-"

"The lamp breaking was your fault," she looked back at me and smiled when I gave her a confused eye, "You were the one who said the bed needed testing before we slept in it"

I chuckled and nodded, "Like you had any complaints. At least I didn't superglue the lamp I broke to the fucking cabinet" we both laughed, "The hotel staff weren't so amused"

She nodded and gave me a beaming smile, "Didn't they call us 'Dumb Yank bums'.. Or something?"

"Yeah well, they were French. Who cares what they think"

She chuckled softly to herself and carried on with trying to unlock the door. I let out a long stressed breath and she glanced back at me. I met her eye and she looked away again.

"You remember that cave dive we did?" She asked leaning closer to the door to inspect her progress. I stared at her and slowly nodded. Maybe she knew I'd been thinking about it too.

"Yeah, I remember"

"D'you remember what you said to me?" I nodded, "D'you remember what I said to you?"

"Of course I do. You said it" She peered back at me and I felt my face grow hot. I looked away and coughed, "Something along the lines of quit being a baby?"

She shook her head but laughed, "Sure, Al" Her smile dropped. My heart jumped. We both looked at each other. I hadn't heard her call me that in ten years. It shook me a little.

Piper looked away and started working, hurriedly trying to untwist the door nuts. I ignored the want in me to talk to her about it and started watching her work. It wasn't going well. She couldn't get a good enough grip on the nut, and that looked pretty welded on too. I got bored watching her struggle after a while and settled on looking around at everything else instead. Strangely I didn't feel so cramped anymore. I knew why of course. Piper. She always managed to make me feel better. Even when she hurt me.

I let out a deep breath and looked down at her when she missed the nut and scratched the glass.

"It's almost count time" I reminded her.

"I know. I know" she mumbled frowning in deep concentration. I wasn't trying to pull her focus or panic her into hurrying. Despite being stuck in a dryer I was liking the alone time with her. I just wish she'd talk.

"I'm pretty sure I'm suffocating" I told her with a smile.

Piper half smiled and it threw her attention off. The wrench slipped off the door nut and smacked the glass hard. The small thud sound reverberated around the small dryer and hit my ears painfully. It sounded like steel being dropped on top of a microphone.

"Ow!" I winced and met her concerned eyes, "Loud"

"Sorry" she mumbled softly. I smiled at her and watched her return to her work.

"So, what, Nicky never came back?" I asked her looking around behind her for the redhead.

"Your girlfriend?" I looked back at her, "No"

I tilted my head at the jealousy in her voice and I smirked at the angry flash in her eyes, "My girlfriend?" I asked.

"Yeah"

My eyes narrowed and my smile widened "What's that supposed to mean?" Piper shrugged and refused to look at me.

"Nothing. Never mind" she turned away and I twisted myself so I could catch her eye

"No, what do you mean by that?"

"I said, nothing. I said, never mind"

I laughed, "What, you expect me to wait for you to come around?"

"Come around?" She repeated looking up and giving me an amused look. I nodded.

"As in "get back together" come around? Are you kidding me?" She dropped the wrench and bent to pick it back up, "I'm engaged" she huffed at me. I smiled some more.

"Right.."

"You know what," She straightened up and met my amused grin with a sour look,

"Do not confuse this" she waved the wrench in my face as she spoke and I followed it unthreatened, "Maybe, just maybe, we will get friendly again. Maybe"

I wanted to laugh. Was that all she wanted? To be pals? Because her little jealous fit said otherwise.

"We were never friends, Piper" I told her huskily. She bent down for her tool belt and rooted around on it, only looking back at me when she heard the hitch in my voice.

"We weren't?"

"No. Not for a second" She rolled her eyes like I was wrong and went back to looking in her bag. I smiled at her,

"I loved you, I loved...having sex with you" Pipers mouth twitched with a smile and I caught her looking back at me a little wistfully like she thought the same.

I felt us slip into a calm smile each and realised I still had more to say before she got this one,

"And more importantly, I am not suggesting that I want you back, you Park Slope narcissist"

Pipers smile dropped even though she knew I'd only been joking. She glared at the corner of the dryer as she tried to find a purchase on the door screws again. I thought about how to fix it quick before she got really mad and walked out. But then she wasn't going anywhere without getting in trouble so I carried on with what I'd been wanting to tell her since day one.

"I mean for you to come around like an actual human being. And not with some hollow bullshit apology, or that cute little sad face that might work on your fucking boyfriend.." Pipers eyes gleamed angrily but she kept quiet and took it out on the dryer, "I've been waiting for you to come around, and treat me like an actual human being and realise what a fucking horse's ass you've been"

She threw the wrench down and turned back to me outraged.

"I've been a horse's ass?!" She cried loudly in total disbelief.

I felt myself get mad and I nodded angrily at her, "Fuck, yeah!"

She pointed at me and glared furiously, "Fuck you! And this dryer!" She smacked her palm against it, and started kick the shit out of it. I flinched with the noise and I covered my ears and winced at every hit she beat into it,

"This fucking shitty piece of goddamn dryer!" She screamed hitting it some more. I watched her waiting for it to stop. Man, she was pissed!

"So abusive!" A new voice chuckled cutting off Piper's attack of the dryer. I saw her freeze at the guard's voice. Footsteps echoed into the room and I turned my head slightly to try and peer out of the dryer. I couldn't see him but Piper's edging away from me told me he was walking over to us.

"Maybe if you tried talking nice to it, or, uh, if you took your top off and rubbed up against it. Might pop open then, right, huh?"

It was luescheck, drunk and grinning at his own joke. He stopped beside the dryer and gave Piper a smug look like he expected her to do what he said. I breathed out my sudden anger at him and looked up at Piper. She peered back at me for help. I stared back. What did she expect me to do?! We were fucked!

"Shit" I mumbled, forgetting to be quiet.

Luescheck looked down at me and his smile fell. He looked between us.

"What the hell's going on?" He demanded.

Piper looked away and I sank back defeated. We totally weren't getting out of this.

"Fuck!"


	9. Chapter 9

_**Right people, we're back on track. This chapters song is Where We Land by Ed Sheeran. Kinda fits better. Thanks for all the reviews and favourites etc! I love that you're enjoying the story! :) **_

* * *

"No. Seriously. What the fuck is going on here?" Luescheck asked going for the dryers door handle. He tried to open it and looked up at Piper when it wouldn't budge

"It's locked. Why is it locked?"

Piper paled and started breaking out into her super sorry look, "It was-"

"An accident" I cut in giving her a silencing look, "We read the book wrong and broke the lock inside the dryer"

"So.. why're you in there?" He asked slowly with a confused frown. Piper looked just as stumped as him but luckily he kept his eyes on me for the answer.

I exchanged a quick glance with her before I lied to him.

"I was leaning in for the back panel and couldn't get at it so I climbed in and..yeah"

Piper was giving me this look that said my lie was lacking strength. I felt like telling her to pick one up. So far all she'd done is get me locked in here.

Luescheck moved his eyes between us and I could see him going over the scenario in his head.

"That doesn't explain why the door shut" he pointed out looking between us. It surprised me how sharp he was considering how drunk he looked. I could see he was already blaming Piper for this. I knew in the way his eyes hardened at her. And I was tempted to let him. But I knew what it'd mean. And I couldn't let her get carted off to shu.

I sighed and shrugged at him.

"I guess I accidentally kicked it when I was trying to get at the circuits. Piper had gone to get more batteries for her torch when it happened"

She was frowning at me, trying to work out why I was covering up for her. I kept my attention on luescheck though and prayed he bought my story.

"Yeah," she said finally backing me up, "You saw me in the shed, remember?"

Luescheck didn't reply. But his eyes glazed a little with his thoughts. It was obvious he couldn't remember a thing. Which didn't help. At all.

He scratched his head and frowned at the dryer, eyes taking in the damage. He stretched up to the top button panel and he noticed the wires were missing. He looked back at Piper.

"I took them out when I was trying to fix the dryer" she said in a rehearsed voice. I rolled my eyes at her. Why did she suck so bad at lying?

_What?!_, She mouthed at me when he went back to assessing the problem. I gave her a look and nodded back at Luescheck, meaning for her to keep him talking.

She took a deep breath and took a step forward with the wrench held out to him.

"I think you should report us to Mr Healy" she said to him as he snatched the tool off her. I stared at her and tapped the window. That was the complete opposite of helping!

She ignored me.

"Oh yeah?" He said kneeling down beside the washer. He reached round the side of it and pulled another panel out.

I waved my hands to get her attention and mouthed at her,

_What the fuck are you doing?!_

S_hut up,_ she mouthed back at me.

Piper watched Luescheck curiously while I silently shouted at her and she nodded to him.

"Yeah, I mean, we kind of fucked up. This dryer probably can't be fixed now. That's money the prison doesn't have. And it'll look good on you right? Two delinquents caught in the act? Especially after the whole screwdriver incident..."

I saw his eyes shuffle away guilty then and I realised what piper was doing. She knew luescheck went to Mendez with his problems. The guy was so laid back when it came to his colleagues he wouldn't care much. He'd cover it over quick by sending us both down the hill and letting us rot there. Healy though.. He was all about the paperwork. He'd hear us out because that was his job. Pornstache wouldn't. Piper was giving us a chance to avoid solitary.

Smart and stupid. That was my Piper.

I felt like applauding her.

Luescheck was nodding at Piper when I peered down at him. Looked like he wanted to avoid another fuck up on his reports.

"Fine. We'll get her out and then it's Healy's office"

We both let out a breath of relief. Piper even looked back at me all smug. I let her have it but I wasn't going to celebrate until we were out of this mess for sure.

Luescheck let out a long sigh at having to actually work for once and moved himself over a little. He squeezed himself between my dryer and the one next to it and let out a pissed groan. I guess Pennsatucky more than fucked it when she ripped them wires out.

Luescheck told Piper to go grab him a screwdriver from the shed. She looked back at me before she left and touched the glass with an expression that asked if I'd be okay. I nodded and raised my hand to touch hers opposite the glass. She looked down at my fingers lined up with hers before she pushed herself away. I watched her go miserably.

While she was gone luescheck asked me what really happened. I shrugged at him.

"I told you" I said gruffly. He laughed at me.

"You're locked in a dryer. The best thing to do is tell the truth"

"Or what?" He looked back at me

"I could always leave you in there..Put the dryer on a cycle.. You know"

I rolled my eyes, "The meth head shut it on me"

"Which one?"

"The holy one" I muttered sarcastic.

Luescheck nodded, "The crazy bible girl?"

"Yep"

"Why didn't you say?" He asked frowning at the wires in his hand. He pulled them separate and hesitated over which one to cut with the pliers he'd pulled from his belt. I flicked my hair back and sighed.

"I don't know. I didn't want Piper getting into trouble"

"What, she your girlfriend or something?"

"Why does my standing up for her have to automatically mean we're fucking?" I asked annoyed.

"Does it?" He smirked. I leant back against the right side of the dryer and looked coldly back at him.

"No"

"You want to though?" He looked back at me and kept my gaze. I started to smile.

"Maybe"

He chuckled, "Man, I'd pay to see that"

"How much? I'll get you a good seat"

He dropped his screwdriver and I laughed as he fumbled to pick it back up. He pointed it at me.

"Don't tease"

I held my hands up and he went back to working.

"You know Nicky right?" He asked me after a while. I frowned at the sudden change in topic.

"Yeah, she's a friend. Why?"

"Just wondering where she is. This is supposed to be her mess I'm cleaning up"

"Red had a problem" I didn't care about telling the truth. All the guards stayed well away from red. Nicky wouldn't get in trouble.

"Figures" He let out a long sigh and tapped the glass window, "Time to see if this worked"

"What happens if it doesn't?" I was nervous about him cutting some random wire when clearly he had no idea what he was doing,

Luescheck shrugged but I could guess what would happen. And I'd admit I was scared. I looked around for Piper.

"Where's Piper?" I asked him before he could cut the wires.

"If she's smart like everybody says, she's walked"

I frowned at him, secretly worrying he was right. Piper might have saved her own neck.

"Or she went to get you that screwdriver you wanted" She answered. We looked back at her walking in and I smiled brightly at her.

"One screwdriver" she said holding it out to him. He coughed and took it off her with a gruff thanks.

Pipers eyes rolled back to me and she knelt beside the dryer again while he went about unscrewing something. I tapped the glass and motioned for her to come closer.

"You know you're stupid?" I told her. She leant away annoyed and I smiled, "Thanks"

"No problem. I mean, you'd have done the same, right" she looked back at me with an expression that said she knew I wouldn't have helped her at out all. I wanted to laugh at her. I'd have helped and some. But I didn't tell her that. Why ruin that horrible image she had of me by telling her the truth. Instead I looked around my little dryer home and tipped my head at her.

"Maybe, after I got you a little heated up first" I smirked arching a brow in a dare to get her to retaliate. Piper just looked away unamused and it had me grinning in victory.

"How much longer is this going to take?" Piper asked crossing her arms. Luescheck glanced back at her.

"Why? Got somewhere better to be?"

"No, no. I just have an important phone call to make"

"Yeah, well, we'll see how that goes after Healy sees you"

Piper looked disappointed and it had me wondering who she had to call so badly. Probably her dumb boyfriend to tell him all about how bad her day with me was going. That's if he knew I was in here too. Judging piper though he probably didn't. She couldn't live without at least one big secret hiding under her skin.

"Okay, here goes..." Luescheck poised his pliers over the wires again and we both shouted at him to stop a second,

"What?" He sighed annoyed

"You're sure that's the right one?" He nodded at her, "A hundred percent?" Piper pushed

"Yes, why?"

"Because I don't want to get cooked if its the wrong fucking wire" I snapped at him. He rolled his eyes

"Man, you chicks are so fucking annoying. Just shut up and let me cut"

"But if it-" he gave piper a mean look and she shut up straight away.

I winced while the pliers hovered over the wires again and I braced myself for it. Luescheck hesitated over them a moment and went for a different one last second. I shut my eyes as he cut and heard piper let out a sharp gasp. I opened them again when I realised I wasn't being burned by hot air. Luescheck was laughing loudly on the floor, the cut wire held in his hand.

"Man, that was fucking priceless!" He wheezed laughing some more. Looking up at piper I realised she was close to going at him.

"Hey, does somebody wanna open the door?"

Luescheck pointed at me and piper turned around to get the door. Fresh air greeted me when it opened and I clambered quickly out of the dryer. Piper helped me up off the floor and jumped in surprise when I hugged her. I didn't want them knowing but I'd been so close to losing it in there. Piper's hands gently touched my arms and pulled them off her. I took a step back and mumbled an apology to her.

"I'm pretty sure there was something else..." We glanced down at the guard on the floor, "Oh yeah!" Luescheck raised a hip flask to his lips and clicked his fingers at us, "No hugging"

"Asshole" Piper said under her breath. I smiled at her and helped her pick up all her books and tools. Luescheck struggled to his feet behind us and motioned at the door.

"C'mon, Healy's waiting"

* * *

"I mean, what exactly were you two doing?" Healy asked looking between us confused. When his eyes met Piper's he looked a little disappointed. Luescheck spoke up behind us. Figures he'd say his piece now and dig himself out of trouble.

"When I got there, the blonde one was screaming and the hot one was stuck inside"

"The hot one?!" They both repeated. Piper even turned around outraged.

Luescheck nodded with a smirk and Piper looked back at me smiling about it. She rolled her eyes and turned again to face the front.

"You can go, Luchek" Healy sighed with a thanking nod as he reached into his desk for a form.

"Okay.." He started to amble out but stopped by the door, "And it's, uh, Lueschek. Like a "loose check?" Healy gave him a blank look and Luescheck smacked the door, "How long have I worked here, man? God!"

The door slammed shut behind him and we looked back at mr Healy. He gave us a waiting look.

"Mr. Healy, it was-"

"I asked her" Piper said cutting me off. I wasn't sure I heard her right. Was she honestly trying to take the bullet for once? Surprised as I was I wasn't going to let her get in trouble. It was my fault Pennsatucky had locked me in the dryer. It had nothing to do with Piper.

"No, I- Look, I volunteered-"

"No. No, I asked her" she said cutting over me again, "She works in the laundry room, so I figured she knew more about the machines than I did. I know that I wasn't supposed to, but I did. This is my fault"

" No, Mr. Healy-"

"Now, just shut up!" he barked over us as he sat up straight. We both hushed up and waited for him to speak. He let out a big breath.

"A couple of years ago, we found two women naked from the waist down, sitting on those dryers for their own enjoyment. You wouldn't happen to have been doing anything like that, would you?"

I smirked and said, "I'm more of a dishwasher kind of gal, sir"

Beside me Piper stifled some laughter.

"What?" He asked.

I laughed, "Nothing"

He looked between us again before he addressed piper, "Glad you're making new friends, Chapman. I'm writing you both a shot. Now get the hell out of my office"

We both let out relieved breaths. A shot was nothing compared to what could have happened. We turned to the door but he called piper back. I left the room and leant up against the wall outside. I still had to thank her properly for helping me out of that dryer. And for staying this time.

I didn't have long to wait.

She rushed out a minute later and brushed past me, ignoring my call after her. I frowned and looked back at healy's office. What the hell had he said to upset her so bad? Healy walked to the door to shut it. He stopped when he saw me and he leant against the jam with a cold look for me.

"Was there something else, Vause?"

I shook my head, "No, sir"

He nodded down the hall for me to get going. I did as I was told and returned to my dorm. I spent the next hour ignoring a letter from my lawyer, no doubt begging for that dumb trial, and reading Jane Austen. I couldn't focus though. Reading was giving me a headache and I couldn't shake off Piper's upset. It was killing me not knowing what was wrong. I hated seeing her that way.

So I decided to hunt her down. I wanted to know why she was upset. I wanted know if I could help in some way. Call me stupid but I wanted to make her feel better.

I jumped up and left the dorm just as Nicky walked in. She looked pretty worried about something but when I asked what it was like she didn't hear me. I wondered if everybody was throwing these moods today. Maybe it was part of the flu or something. I let Nicky walk off to an end cube and walked myself down the hall to check the library. Piper always read a book when she was upset.

"Ain't seen no blonde girls today" Tastee told me when I asked, "Unless you be meaning about my gorgeous weave highlight" she bounced her hair in her hand flashing the hair piece that clearly didn't belong to her. I shook my head at her and left. Maybe she was in her dorm? I got stopped trying to walk into the Ghetto though.

"Vause! If I have to shoot you again today so hel-"

Bell cut off with a loud sneeze and I used the moment to duck into B Dorm. The women who saw me didn't seem to care I was here. They just let me walk by. I did get stopped by Poussey through.

"Yo, you ain't allowed in here"

"Is Piper around?" She shrugged at me.

"The fuck should I know? I ain't her keeper"

"It was just a question" I snapped back at her, walking further down the cubes. Most of the women were sick and asleep in their bunks. I stopped by yoga's and handed her the bottle of water she was struggling to reach. She smiled and asked what I was after.

"Chapman" I said feeling myself blush when she chuckled weakly. She pointed to the block opposite her and I nodded gratefully.

I took a deep breath and stepped across the floor to the adjacent cube, readying my thank you speech as I did. But Piper's bed was empty too. I sighed annoyed and leant against the wall. My eye drifted over all the books neatly stacked by Piper's bed. I smiled. Still a book worm. I pinpointed one I recognised and gently stepped into the cube to pick it up. My fingers classes around the worn cover and brushed over its pages. I remembered this book. And the smile that had been on her face when I'd given it to her. I couldn't believe she still had it.

"What do you think you are doing?" A stern voice demanded. I looked down at the old lady sitting up in her bed glaring at me. I put the book back.

"Well?" She barked, "Use your words, girl"

"I was just-"

"I can see what you were just. What you don't understand is this is my bunk, and nobody simply walks in when they like. Now, if it is a book you are after go to the library. Now leave"

"But I wasn't-"

"I said, leave"

I gave her a cold look and left Piper's bunk. What a bitch! No wonder people think she murdered somebody.

"Inmate! You're out of bounds!" I jumped and whisked around at the male voice. But it wasn't a guard. Bursett was stood behind me laughing. I scowled at her. I hated when she did that!

"I'm sorry, honey. Couldn't help myself. But what you doing in here? You should skip before a real guard sees you"

"I'm looking for a friend. Chapman?"

"The Taylor swift wannabe? Saw her walk past commissary just now. Think she was headed for Healy's office"

I thanked her and left the dorm. I snuck past a still sneezing Bell and checked commissary. Chang wasn't any help so I walked back up the hall and into the slowly filling cafeteria. She wasn't there either though. I frowned and scanned the room another time just to make sure. Why was Piper making this so hard? I'd played games of 'Where's Waldo' that were easier than this. I mean, it's prison. There's only so many places you can hide.

Morello spotted me from the kitchen and called my name. She left her place at Red's side to come talk to me. I asked her if she'd seen Piper and she nodded.

"Looks like Chapman had a call to make" she said.

I nodded and thanked her before I turned my back on her knowing grin and walked out to the phones. I spotted her straightaway.

"Hey! No cutting!" I ignored the girl and took another step towards the phones where Piper was stood with her back to me. I got pushed back a step though by the guard. He read my name tag and sighed.

"It's not your call time. Come back later"

"But-"

He turned away and I scowled at him before I turned to the back of the line. I leant up against the wall and stood tapping my fingers against my arm. The others all talked about how cheeky I was thinking I could cut ahead of them. They laughed at me. I just stared blankly back like I didn't hear or care for what they said. In my head I was beating them all down.

I pulled my eyes back over to piper and I watched her talk. She'd turned towards me but she hadn't noticed me yet. Whoever she was talking to was making her smile. Making her laugh. And fuck did I feel jealous. She looked so happy in her little moment with them. Like she wasn't in prison. Just stood at home talking on the phone. I wished so bad I could go back and stop all this shit from happening. Because piper would be making this call at home right now if she'd never met me. She'd never stop smiling because she wouldn't have a reason to. Maybe she was right. Maybe I should stay away from her.

Pipers expression changed from happy to upset suddenly and she was trying not to cry. I frowned to myself while I watched her lips shake and her hand hold the phone tighter. She said something that looked like a goodbye and completely broke down. It hurt like fucking hell watching it. I wanted to walk over and hold her. Wanted to wipe the tears away and ask what was wrong. But I couldn't. I didn't have that right anymore and she didn't want me near her.

The women beside her saw her crying and offered her a tissue. And it annoyed me because a total stranger could offer her comfort but I couldn't. I swallowed the impulse to walk over to her and pushed off the wall. I couldn't stand around watching her cry. I took a deep breath and forced myself to walk away. I could talk to her anytime. Right now she needed to be alone. So I wandered around dodging sick people until I got fed up and shoved my way outside into the cold. I walked down the hill towards the track and stopped by the fence. I stared out at the trees outside the prison. At the freedom I wasn't allowed. None of this was fair. I kept staring off into the distance. My headache was slowly flaring back to life and the cold air was making me sniff. I should have grabbed a coat.

"Alex?" I froze and looked over my shoulder. Piper was stood behind me watching me worried. Her eyes were red and she still had a few tears on her face. I turned and smiled at her.

"Hey, what're you doing out here?"

"What're you?" I shrugged

"Avoiding sick people. I can't stand being stuck in that apocalyptic hell"

Piper nodded and moved to lean against the fence beside me. My eyes traced the tear lines on her face and I couldn't stop myself from reaching out and brushing them away with my thumb. She stared back at me as I did.

"Bad call?" I asked in a deep voice. Piper breathed slowly out and shook her head at me

"No it was just Larry. Polly had her baby. She callled him Finn"

She smiled and I frowned at her, "Polly?" I couldn't remember Piper having any friends called Polly, "Recent friend?"

She laughed and shook her head in disbelief, "You met Polly, Alex. A few times actually. You honestly don't remember her?"

I shrugged back at her. I never really paid much attention to anybody besides piper. She was all I ever focused on back then. Her and work.

"Polly...?"

"Harper"

I frowned in concentrated then snapped my fingers, "Polly hobby!" I grinned happily. Piper rolled her eyes at me.

"Yeah, that one. Your memory sucks ass, Alex"

I chuckled back at her and turned to lean my shoulder on the fence. I met her eyes with an easy smile and asked what they'd been talking about. Piper didn't say but I just knew I'd been in the conversation somewhere. Wonderful Larry probably got to know everything going on in Piper's head. No way would I have been missed out. Piper looked down at my shirt and frowned to herself at the way I was shivering a little.

"You should get back inside," she told me seriously, "You'll get sick"

"Like I care"

"You should. You're terrible when you're sick" I laughed with her and nodded. I was. She raised a hand to the fence and started to pick at the metal. I watched her waiting. I knew she had something to say.

"Thanks" she mumbled after a couple minutes.

I didn't say anything. I was waiting for her to look at me and say it. She let out a sigh and stood straight,

"I mean it. You didn't have to help me out, and you definitely didn't have to get into that dryer. I mean, you hate closed spaces" I nodded at her, "After the way i've been treating you lately…"

I tilted my head at her, guessing secretly how she was going to steer this. It was fun watching her apologise. She was always the perfect balance of self righteous and completely shamed. The perfect cocktail for forgiveness really. It was just hard trying to figure out whether she meant it or not.

Piper tucked her hair behind her ear and gave me a tiny smile. I crossed my arms over still waiting. I saw her swallow nervous before she nodded to herself.

"Thank you, is what Im trying to say"

"So just say it" I chuckled. Pipers eyes brightened when she realised I wasn't mad and she knocked my arm playfully.

We both turned back to the trees and let out a sigh together. She was stood pretty close. if i stretched my hand out a couple inches i could take hers. And man i wanted that. I let out another breath instead, letting my frustration and want out in a frosted exhale of annoyance. Piper nudged my arm again.

"D'you remember... that time in Brussels-"

"First or last time?" I asked annoyed all of a sudden. Brussels was a pretty sore topic still. Piper didn't say so I turned back to her with a smile, "Both were pretty memorable"

She laughed with a nod, "First. After we got that stupid wig off"

I laughed too and touched her blonde hair, "I don't know, I think you looked pretty sexy with short hair"

She smacked my hand down, "Did not" She huffed turning back to the fence, I chuckled back at her.

"What about Brussels?" I asked. She glanced back at me and shrugged, obviously she didn't want to talk anymore. I let it go and coughed. She looked back at me, that old knowing glint brightening her eyes.

"I'm not sick" I told her gruffly. Piper just smiled.

"Why did you help today?" She asked me. I kept my eyes trained on hers. It should have been obvious.

"You needed it"

"And the fact that Pennsatucky was there..?" I smiled at her. Piper didn't miss a thing did she. I nodded.

"Yeah, maybe I wanted to piss her off. But not enough to have myself locked up. I already got that deal just being here"

"Well you did sort of-" I raised my hand to stop her.

"Don't you dare" I warned.

Piper dropped it and let out a soft sigh that shone silver in the air. I smiled at her. I wanted to ask about the book. And her bunkie. And everything else. I'd love to just sit down with her and ask everything about her life. Everything I knew, everything I'd missed. I wanted to know her all over again. I loved and hated how curious she made me sometimes.

"Hey Pipes?" She looked back at me, "Thank you, for helping me get out of the dryer. I was freaking out a little back there"

"I could tell" she teased bumping my arm. I nodded and gave her a little smile.

"I mean it. Thanks"

Piper saw the honesty in my eyes and nodded too. She told me no problem and turned towards the prison.

"We should probably get inside, before you freeze to death"

I rolled my eyes at her,

"You can't freeze to death, Piper"

"Oh no you can. See recent studies.." She kept babbling about some writer who proved something about the body. I don't know. I wasn't listening. I just watched the way her eyes lit up while she shared information. The way her hands moved with her explanation. The way she seemed to have forgotten she secretly hated me. She stopped talking when she got to the door. I pulled it open for her and nodded.

"Interesting" I said in what I hoped was an intrigue voice. Piper rolled her eyes.

"You didn't listen at all, did you?"

"I did!" I argued. She chuckled and walked into the prison ahead of me.

"No, you didn't. You always pull that face when you're pretending you heard everything"

I blinked. I didn't know I had a face for that.

Piper laughed at me and pulled me into the hall so the door would shut. I shivered some more despite it being really warm inside. The change in temperature made me dizzy. Piper was giving me that look again and I poked her.

"I'm not sick"

* * *

Why does everything feel a thousand times worse when you're ill? The bed feels lumpy just to make you ache some more. The light from the window hurts to look at. Every little sound around you makes your ears sting. And the constant coughing and sneezing just makes you want to die. I hated being sick. I hated the motions you had to go through, the crap symptoms. And I hated how weak it made you. If Pensatucky were to pull something she'd have a better chance of killing me off doing it now. But with the way I was feeling, I'd pay her to do it.

I reached up behind me for the tissues on my cabinet and pulled a clean one down to wipe my nose with. I coughed and it tore my throat apart, making me wince. I felt so weak and self pitying. Not to mention fucking hungry. I groaned into my pillow. I hated this.

"You sick?"

I looked back at Piper stood by my cube and nodded. I'd lie but it was pretty obvious. She gave me this soft look and it gave me the strength to speak.

"Oh, yeah" I croaked sitting myself up, "It got me a day late"

I peered back at her nodding while she picked at the wall. She apologised and I smiled.

"What, are you a vampire now? Do you need an invitation?"

"No"

I rolled my eyes and regretted it when it made me dizzy, "Just come in. But not too close. I'm contagious" I warned. I didn't want her getting sick too.

"I know" she said coming in and taking a seat beside me. She looked upset again.

"I'm plotting my revenge on that redneck fucking Deliverance extra" I told her, "If you want in"

"Maybe" she mumbled. I tilted my head at her.

"You seem depressed. Even for prison.." She didn't say anything, "You know, if you ever wanna talk about it, that's what the counsellors are for"

I heard her sigh annoyed and I tried to laugh but ended up coughing some more.

"Personally, I went on sad drugs when I got here, and they worked for a while, but now I just cheek 'em and trade 'em for black eyeliner" I chuckled to myself and sniffed into a tissue. Piper stayed quiet beside me, "They make me constipated. I would rather shit and cry than strain and nap all the time"

I thought that would make her laugh, or at least smile but I got nothing. I peered over at her.

"What's wrong? Really"

"He wrote an article about me" she mumbled.

"The fiancé?"

She nodded, " Mmm-hmm. "One Sentence, Two Prisoners""

"Oh, it's a terrible title"

"I know. And I'm happy for him, but he got he got so much of it so wrong. I'm not somebody's girlfriend. I'm not some cool story at a yuppie fucking cocktail party. "You did a year in the Peace Corps? I did a year in prison. "Fuck, no!"

I hid my smile at how pissed she was at her dumb husband to be. Secretly I was glad she got annoyed with him. Glad he got it wrong. It showed he wasn't the all perfect me Prince Charming she'd been making out he was. And for once I wasn't the one pissing her off, I was the one she was going to for comfort. I loved it.

"Those things we did, you and me, that wasn't adventure or a romp. That was my life"

I stared at her. I never thought she'd see it that way. Or speak like that. She said it like she missed it. Like she regretted walking out on it. She even looked a little tearful. Did that mean she missed me too? I leant closer for a second and smiled at her.

"You want me to kill him? I may be a sick lesbian in a prison bunk, but I got a couple tricks up my sleeve" I coughed on a laugh again and sigh annoyed.

"I feel like I am missing so much" Piper whispered. I looked up and found her staring at the wall. I looked down at her hand on my bed and slowly reached down for it. She looked down when my fingers brushed hers. I gently took her hand and brushed my thumb against her skin.

"Me, too" I told her honestly.

Piper met my eyes and stared at me. I stared back, having this tiny silent conversation with just her eyes. I could see so much she was hiding. And I felt myself let her see me too. Then her eyes narrowed.

"Why are you making that face?" I asked her. She raised a hand and sneezed into it. She looked back at me and sniffed.

"Shit" she growled. I chuckled and handed her a clean tissue.

"Welcome to prison, kid" I told her with a chuckle.

Piper groaned annoyed and leant back against the wall, hand still holding mine. I smiled to myself and began stroking my thumb against the back of hers. I let myself marvel at the softness of her skin, the unmarked texture of it. I sat inside the happy tingles her touch gave me. I'd missed this.

"D'you ever think, maybe, if we'd stopped back then, we'd be.. I mean.."

I looked back at her and nodded, "I like to think so"

Piper raised our hands and looked at them. She sniffed again and let out a little breath.

"Things were easier back then, huh?"

I shook my head, "They weren't easier. Just happier"

She smiled at me, "You were happy?"

"You weren't?" I challenged smiling when she propped her chin against our hands and grinned at me.

"I can't remember being happier than that" she told me solemnly. I beamed at her.

"Yo, blondie, you wanna move it" I scowled over at Nicky stood outside my cube. Morello was with her, coughing her guts up. She gave me a gentle smile when she was done and pointed over her shoulder

"We gots a sweep about to happen" she wheezed. Nicky rubbed her back and nodded at us.

"Right now?" I said disappointed when Piper stood up and took her hand back. Nicky didn't miss the way I tried to keep hold of her. She smirked at me before she nodded.

"Caputo's idea. I figure he thinks he's gonna find more contraband and shit if we're too sick to hide it"

"Smart" Piper mumbled moving over to the wall.

I shakily stood up after her and followed her to the wall. I snagged her shirt before she could leave and I gave Nicky and Morello a short look.

"Oh! Look at the time! I gotta go. I'm designing the table layouts for my wedding so Christopher can get it organised and ready" Morello walked off to her cube with a sneeze and Nicky sighed after her.

"And I'm going to go shoot myself listening to it," she looked back at us and grinned, "Have a nice pep talk"

I rolled my eyes at her back and turned round to Piper. She looked like she wanted to go. I sighed. I hated how our little moment had been ruined.

"Pipes, if you ever wanna talk-"

"I know" she said with a grumpy look, "The councillors"

"No. Me. Seriously"

She looked up with a smile

"Really?"

I nodded, "Well, I'm no expert but.. It's what friends do, right?"

She looked back at me stunned before she nodded and nervously hugged me. I blinked in shock before I hugged her back. I felt her let out a small breath of content into my shoulder and I grinned to myself before I let her go and stood back.

"You better go before you get another shot. And here," I bent down to my cabinet and opened it for the bottle I'd hidden under a shirt. Nicky had gotten me it earlier when she dropped by to check up on me. Chang's cold medicine.

I slipped it into her palm and squeezed her hand, "For the flu"

She nodded and tucked it down her shirt before giving me a smile and leaving. I leant against the wall and watched her go with a happy smile.

"So.. How'd it go?" Nicky asked leaning on the wall beside me, Morello was propped up on her shoulder. I nodded.

"Extremely well" I mumbled replaying it all into head. I saw Nicky give Morello a look and I turned back to them.

"Maybe we should get you two sick more often" Morello suggested thoughtfully.

"Yeah" Nicky agreed with her, "You looked like you weren't trying to kill each other for once"

I chuckled at them both, "Maybe"

They both smiled warmly back at me, happy that I was happy.

"Inmates! Bunk inspection!"

We all groaned and moved to our places by our cubes. Nicky was smirking opposite me when I looked up at her.

"What?" I sighed with a cough. She shrugged.

"Anybody ever tell you you look b-e-a-uuuutiful with a smile?"

I coughed on my laughter and shook my head at her. I couldn't believe she was hitting on me right now. Nicky winked back at me all playful and I sighed.

"And how many girls has that line gotten you?" I asked. Nicky looked beside her at Morello and smiled to herself.

"So far only one"

"That fell for it?" I asked. Nicky shook her head.

"That counted" she said softly beaming at Morello when the italian smiled back at her. I smiled to myself at them both. What a pair of softies.

I was going to ask how things were with them now but the guard stopping outside my bunk stopped me. He barked his usual bored line of inspection and proceeded to kick my belongings around. I didn't watch him but Nicky's look of irritation at him told me he was taking the piss.

"All clear!" He yelled walking out and over to Nicky's bunk. She stepped aside for him and glared at his back while he trashed her stuff. I frowned when Tricia was missing from the wall beside the redhead.

"Where's Tricia?" I asked her.

Nicky's expression dropped guiltily and she shrugged. The guard yelled an all clear and we were allowed to go back to our morning. Which now consisted of cleaning up their mess. Nicky never replied to me, she just reached inside her cube for her radio and left the dorm.

"Nicky!" Morello called after her, "You gotta clean your bunk!"

She was ignored. I didn't get what the problem was. But from the way Nicky was storming out I could guess it was serious.

I was curious enough to go after her but I felt like shit. Instead I cleaned up my stuff and collapsed on my bed again, exhausted. I wondered what Piper was doing right now. Whether she was still worrying over the douche boyfriend or whether she was thinking about me too. I smiled to myself. I hoped she was.


	10. Chapter 10

_**Guys! I've realised I missed out the Moscow Mule ep! Gah! I might write it up and shuffle the chapters around oooor because there's only two Alex bits in that episode I might just chuck them in a future ep. Face it, we only wanna see Alex spit crackers at Nicky. We'll see how it goes and whether or not I can create an entire episode solo. If I do I'll have to post an author's note or something so you can go back and read it. It'll be like chapter 7 (?) or something. **_ _**Anyways back to this update! I've made it super long because I've got a crap ton of cover shifts at work for a while and honestly I'm probably not going to update 'til after I've binged season 3 at least four times. Y'know how it is.**** This ep will be cut into three chapters too because there were quite a few Alex scenes and I don't wanna skip any. So bear with me yeah.**_ _**The song today is Eden by Hozier. I'm gonna shut up now and go back to stalking Season 3 sneak peeks on YouTube (ahh only 2 days left!) **_ _**Enjoy! :) **_

* * *

"Vause!"

I turned my head out of my daydream and smiled slightly at Fischer as she walked over to me. She had her arms full of case files and a bag was slipping down her arm with every step she took towards me. She looked pretty out of breath trying to balance it all in her arms. But she had a bright smile on her face, her innocent blue eyes were sparkling happily. You could forget you were in prison seeing somebody that happy. But then she had a reason to be. She wasn't stuck here twenty-four-seven.

Fisher stopped in front of me and eyed my casual lean against the B dorm wall. I straightened up a little and tried to make out like I wasn't waiting for somebody.

"You're sort of out of bounds, you know?" She told me crossing her arms awkwardly. She had a coffee cup in one hand that spilt a little on her shirt when she forgot and tried tucking it under her arm. She looked down at the stain and swore under her breath.

I smiled at her, "But you're not going to rat on me. Are you, Fischer?"

She blushed a little when I smirked and I chuckled under my breath before I took a step forward with my hands outstretched to help her. She smiled gratefully and dumped some of the files into my hands. I looked down at them, intrigued by the label on the the top file saying it contained phone call history.

"You're snooping on our calls now?" I asked her tapping the file. Fischer shuffled nervous and slipped it out of my hands.

"It's protocol" she said steely, "New security measure"

I nodded even though we both knew I wasn't buying it,

"Sure..."

"You're not waiting for somebody are you?" She asked nodding at the dorm and taking a sip of her coffee. I watched her swallow and felt a pang of jealousy hit me hard. God I missed coffee.

I shook my head in answer to the question. I had been waiting for piper but I didn't want the guards knowing. They spread rumours quicker than the inmates. She smiled in relief and asked if I'd help her carry her stuff to the staff office, seeing as I wasn't busy. I wanted to say no. Piper would be expecting me. But that little smile of hers really got me. And I wasn't really busy.

So I nodded"Sure"

"Thanks" she balanced the cup on top of the remaining files in her hand and hiked her bag back up onto her shoulder.

I followed her when she started to walk away, with a quick look over my shoulder in case piper came out and saw me. At least if she did she'd know why I didn't turn up.

"So how was your weekend?" Fischer asked politely. I laughed and she turned to me all confused

"Sorry," I told her sliding my glasses back up my nose, "It's been a while since somebody asked how my weekend went"

She smiled nervously and nodded dumbly to herself "I get it, people don't ask that in prison"

"No, they really don't" We walked on in quiet and I sighed, "I guess it was okay. I could have gone without the random raid and my lawyer calling in. But, yeah, another standard weekend in prison"

I didn't tell her about the day I'd spent in the yard with piper, talking and reminiscing. Or the afternoon I'd had reading in her bunk. Or the food fight she'd helped me win against Nicky in the electric shed. Why share those precious moments with anyone but piper?

Fischer nodded and gave me a sympathetic smile, "if it makes you feel any better my weekend wasn't all that either"

"Boyfriend troubles?" I asked. She smiled back at me

"Hey, how'd you know?"

"Just a feeling. For what's it's worth, he's an ass"

"You can't say that when you don't know him" she told me strongly with what she probably thought was a mean look. I just chuckled. It was hard not to. She couldn't do mean at all. She was just gentle for that.

"If he's a dick to you, he's an ass" I stated simply.

She looked down at the floor. "He did sort of yell for no reason.." She mumbled in agreement and I could tell being with this guy was something she questioned herself for a lot.

I bumped her arm and smiled at her "My advice?" She nodded and stared at me with her complete attention, "Leave him. You are far too nice and far too beautiful to be wasted on a man that won't treat you like royalty"

Fischer frowned at me. Her lips pursed into a thin line. She looked kind of confused. "Are you hitting on me?" She quietly asked.

I struggled not to laugh and shook my head at her

"No" I chuckled, "I'm just being friendly. Unless it's working.."

She blinked in shock and I chuckled again before I bumped her arm with a joking smile. She realised it was a joke and laughed with me while we started walking again.

We passed the meds line, a few of the girls giving us looks. I glared them down when they started making loud jokes about Fischer. But she didn't seem to notice. She was in her own cloud walking along greeting some of the inmates like friends. And for the most part they genuinely smiled back. I watched her interact with them. Watched her socialise happily. I couldn't figure her out. Honestly, I had no fucking clue why she was here. She'd be far better suited in a carers position.

"You know I swear I've seen you before" she told me in a thoughtful voice that broke my studying of her. I looked back surprised. I thought it'd just been me.

"Yeah? Maybe you have"

"It's kind of irritating me not knowing" she shared scowling. I chuckled

"How old are you?" I asked peering at her curiously.

"Twenty-eight"

"Hmm.." That explained the bambi attitude. It also meant if I'd known her it wasn't from work. She'd have only been a kid. I felt a flicker of frustration.

"Did you ever live in New York?" Was my follow up. She nodded earnestly,

"I'm a Brooklyn girl"

I smiled at her, "Same here! Maybe I passed you in the street a few times"

"Maybe.." She was staring at me trying to figure out where exactly she knew me from. And from the looks of it it annoyed her as much as it did me. I hid our shared frustration and just smiled at her, nodding at the door we'd stopped at.

"This is you" I said handing her her files and opening the door for her.

She smiled and checked inside the room before she stepped closer. Like really close. Her skin brushed mine and when I inhaled I could smell the innocent perfume she was wearing. I don't know why but it reminded me of home.

"Here," she reached out and handed me her cup, "Have a nice day, Alex"

"Thanks?" Did she just give me her trash? I looked down at it in my hand. Confusingly it was still warm. And heavy.

I pulled the lid off the cup when she turned away and I stared down at it while she walked into the staff room. It was full. She'd barely drank any. And she'd just given it to me?

I felt a strange urge to cry. Nobody had been that kind to me. Not for a long time. And definitely not in here.

I looked up to thank her properly but she'd already vanished. She was all honesty and kindness, and humble enough not to want a thanks. I couldn't help but like Fischer even more.

"Yo, takeaway, you got any muffins hidden away there?"

I glanced up at Nickys strut over and I grinned at the mischief in her eyes. They cut back to the co staff room before reaching mine.

"I didn't get you a number but I did get me some coffee. Actual coffee!" I held the cup out so she could see. Nicky peered down at it with shock on her face

"Damn! Fischer must really like you. All I ever get is that cute little smile" She went for my cup but I pulled my hand out of her reach by raising it above my head. Nicky growled and tried jumping for it, still failing to reach the cup. It had me laughing at her.

"Cmon! Vause! It's prison. We're supposed to share"

"Yeah, right" I scoffed back, "It's my coffee. Go charm your own off Bell" I nodded down the hall at the officer as she walked grumpily into the main prison. Getting a coffee off her came seriously close to swimming with frenzied sharks. Nicky snorted beside me and shook her head

"No fucking thanks" I chuckled and took a fresh sip of fischer's coffee. And man was it good. You forget how great things taste when you're stuck eating the same shit everyday. This coffee could have come from a shitty street vendor by fishers apartment and it still tasted like heaven to me. I moaned happy and decided to let Nicky try some. I remembered how she said she missed it too.

"Holy shit! That's good!" she moaned swallowing some more. I snatched it back off her before she could drink it all for me. I smiled at her pouting miserably at me

"Maybe we should persuade Fischer to make coffee runs for us" I conspired swallowing some more.

Nicky grinned "Well, I'm in but, you'll have to do all the work. Looks like baby officer has a thing for you especially"

I laughed at the jealously in her voice and shrugged nonchalantly

"I can't help it if everybody loves me" I argued grinning.

Nicky laughed and gently shoved me. We shared a smile and she looked away behind me. I went back to my coffee, looking up suddenly when she tapped my arm

"Hey, speaking of people loving you.." She nodded her head down the hallway.

I looked over my shoulder and smiled at piper as she wandered over to us. Her skin was a little flushed and her hair was damp. She'd just come out of the shower. Maybe that was why she looked happy. Piper always loved being clean.

She stopped close beside me and gave me a warm smile that made her eyes sparkle beautifully. I couldn't help but grin back, or stop the skip in my heart when she touched my hand.

"I thought we were going to hang out before work today?" She asked looking down at the cup in my hand. I passed it to her to ease her curiosity.

"I had a coffee date with Fischer instead" I teased her. Nicky scoffed beside me

"You should have seen her, Chapman. Walking Fischer to the door and carrying her files for her. I'm surprised you didn't give her a kiss goodbye, Vause"

I sniggered with her, "Ah well, it was tempting but she has a boyfriend"

"Like that ever stopped you before" Nicky retorted walking off grinning happily at her trouble stirring. I rolled my eyes after her. Beside me Piper was taking a sip of the coffee.

"Wow, that's good!" she sighed having some more, "Mmm! Gosh, why does coffee always taste so nice when you detox?"

"You call this a detox?" I chuckled, unsurprised she was still into those. She shrugged at me and smiled over the cup

"Not a voluntary one" she replied slowly sipping more. It had me shivering when she moaned happily with closed eyes.

I leant against the wall to watch her and I shook my head when she offered it back to me

"I'm sorry I wasn't there earlier" I told her genuinely, "Fischer was sort of struggling so-"

"You wanted to play fairytale," she avoided my amused smile at her drop in tone and nodded to herself, "I get it. It's okay. Honestly"

I chuckled under my breath, shaking my head at her when she asked what I found so funny. Honestly she was so cute with her jealousy sometimes. It was killing me. Piper leant up against the wall beside me and let out a deep sigh as she tipped her head back and stared up at the ceiling. I found myself staring at her throat. It was just begging to be kissed. I swallowed the impulse to lean over and instead tapped Piper's hand.

"You know I can't shake the feeling I've seen her before.. Outside here, I mean"

"Fischer?" I nodded, "I know what you mean. But maybe she just has one of those faces"

"What faces?" I asked when I heard the venom in her voice. I didn't get why she was suddenly mad. Piper looked back at me coldly and handed me back my coffee

"You know, one of those potential mule faces. You probably know her from that. It's how you know everybody, right"

She started to walk off but I grabbed her wrist

"Hey, don't give me that" She slowly looked back at me. I looked her dead in the eye, "You know you were never like that for me"

"Why? Because I said no after the first go?" I ignored the sarcasm in her voice and shook my head at her

"Because I loved you, Piper" I watched her eyes softened a little, "You were my girlfriend. Not another way to smuggle drug money around"

She turned back to me angry again and gave me a steel like glare, "You know, it doesn't matter how many times you tell yourself that. It's never going to be the truth" She yanked her arm free of my grip and walked away.

I let out a deep breath and told myself to leave her. She'd calm down and come around later. There was no point ruining the morning by arguing over it with her. I followed her to the cafeteria and we stood in dead silence as we waited to get our food. I chewed it over while I finished off my coffee. I wanted to talk to her. Apologise. Even though I had fuck all to apologise for. I just didn't want to stand there awkward with her. Especially not after how good everything with her had been in the last few days.

I reached out for her hand and brushed my finger against the back of it, gently asking if she was still mad. Piper didn't respond. She kept facing forward and ignored me. When I looked up she was staring ahead at the line like nothing had happened. I stood back annoyed and crossed my arms. I hated how stubborn she got.

"Hey, its, uh, Alex, right?"

I looked around and recognised the girl stood nervous beside me. She'd sat beside me during the wac stuff. I nodded at her

"It's Vause, actually" I told her as I turned towards her. I didn't want to seem rude seeing as she was nice and all but at the same time I didn't want everybody in here thinking they could get friendly with me. She nodded in understanding,

"Andrews. Hi again. Erm.," she pointed over her shoulder, "Red sent me. She, uh.." She scratched her neck and gave me a tiny smile, "She wants a word"

"Great.." I looked over her shoulder at the kitchens and met the Russian's unamused look for me. She looked pretty pissed. Fuck knows why though. I'd been staying well under the Red radar. I stared unaffected back at her. Showing her I wasn't scared.

"Tell Red I'm busy" I told andrews shortly. I knew I'd get in shit for refusing to meet with Red but I didn't care. I was done running errands for her.

"For real?" Andrews asked staring at me like I was dumb. I didn't say anything. Just turned back to the front. She called me crazy under her breath and left to tell Red.

I tapped my coffee cup and shuffled up the line with the others, silently wondering what Red wanted with me.

"She's right you know" I looked up when Piper spoke, "You're kind of crazy"

I chuckled back at her,

"But you knew that already"

Piper nodded and I watched a smile flicker across her lips

"Yeah"

I smiled at her and moved to stand beside her in the line. She glanced up at me and when she saw me smiling she broke out into a little grin. I beamed back at her. I was forgiven for now.

"You know she's probably going to cut off your food again, right?" I shrugged at her,

"I wasn't hungry anyway" I looked down at the serving counters as we approached them and I internally groaned. Damn, breakfast looked edible for once.

Piper knocked my arm to get my attention. She nodded at the stack of trays beside me. I grabbed one and teased it in front of her with a playful grin before I let her take it. She batted me with it with a totally fake scowl. I just laughed happily.

"You know what I miss most?" She started. I thought about it for a second

"Not eating off trays?" I asked picking one up for myself. I knew that was something I definitely missed

"No. I miss waking up and just making eggs. Or toasting a bagel. Or something. You know? Just getting up and doing it myself. The routine of it all. I miss that"

_Sounds familiar.._

I watched her look down at her tray sadly. I nodded at her. I kinda missed that too. I kinda missed watching her do it as well. Memories of it all flashed inside my head as I watched her and I was reminded painfully of sitting in sunny places and tasting breakfast on her lips. I had to take a sharp breath on when it hurt.

Piper didn't notice anything was wrong. She was just as lost in her thoughts as I was. Thoughts about us, or her and her boyfriend, who knew. But it was obvious her question had triggered something emotional inside her. She started twisting the tray in her hands agitated with her thoughts. I reached out and stopped her. I gave her a smile,

"You mean you miss breaking the toaster trying to make breakfast?" I teased. She rolled her eyes away from me despite grinning about it.

"Are you ever going to let that go?" She asked groaning.

"Fuck no! It's a funny story. Besides," I leant down to her ear and lowered my voice to a whisper, "It makes you smile and I like that. So..."

Piper tilted her head round and looked back at me. Her eyes stared openly up at me, flicking across my face in thought. I held her gaze and focused on breathing steady. We were so close it was making me nuts. All I wanted was to reach out and touch her. All I had to do was tilt my head a little and I'd kiss her. I gripped my tray tighter in my hand to keep myself from moving. This was getting even harder. It was unfair.

"Hello liddle lovebirds, how are we today?" A high pitched voice sang beside us.

Piper broke our staring and took a step back to smile at morello. I glanced back at her too and was unsurprised to find Nicky stood right beside the other girl. You couldn't have one without the other. She had that knowing smile going again. Like she'd seen everything that just happened and couldn't wait for more. I hated being her fucking soap opera in here.

"Maybe stop with the lovebird calling, Morello" Piper said quietly avoiding my eyes. She turned back to the front and held her tray out for Norma to fill, "We're just friends"

"Right.." Nicky looped her arm over morello and tapped her hand against her shoulder, "Did that look friendly to you, Morello?" She asked rhetorically. Morello shrugged

"I don't know, it looked a little past friendly. More like.." She looked away pretending to think and Nicky grinned at me before she opened her mouth to finish Morello's sentence

"More like-"

"Hey!" They shut up and looked back at me grinning between themselves, "She said we're just friends. That's all there is" Nickys eyes turned sympathetic. She'd heard the bitterness hiding in my voice. She knew what I was thinking.

The pair held their hands up in surrender and backed away. They whispered something to each other and Nicky quickly jumped forward to steal my coffee before they headed off towards the kitchen together. I let her have it. I didn't care anymore.

I watched them go, annoyed and jealous. Their relationship looked so easy from the outside. It wasn't fair how I couldn't have the same with piper. We were just swings and frigging rollercoasters.

I sighed to myself and told myself to grow up and stop caring. That's how you deal in this place. You shut off emotion and learn to just exist. That was key to survival. I wanted to laugh. That had always been my way out.

Piper was watching me when I turned back to her. I sighed.

"What?" I asked seeing she was confused by something.

She blinked and shook her head "Nothing"

I frowned at her and watched her grab her food and stand off to the side to wait for me. I let out a quiet huff and held my tray out to Norma. She looked back into the kitchen before she tapped gina's arm. I rolled my eyes and held my tray out to the other woman stood between them but she didn't take it.

"Na-uh" Gina took hold of the tray, "You know the rules, Stretch" She pulled the tray out of my hand and held it out to Norm. I laughed, a little disbelieving

"I refuse to talk Russian and suddenly that's an excuse to starve me? Are you kidding me?"

"Move along already" Gina sighed annoyed. Norma took my tray and put it on the counter beside her. Behind them Red was smiling happily. I glared at her.

"You know," Piper leant across me suddenly to talk to the two women and we all looked back at her surprised, "As a wac representative I can probably have you two reassigned. I hear maintenance needs a couple extra hands sorting the garbage.. So.."

I tried to hide my smile. Was Piper actually standing up for me? Standing up for me and making threats? It was hard taking it seriously when she was glaring like that at the other women. Like she thought she looked tough and impressive. Poor Piper.

"You can't do that" Gina told her with a strong look that no way covered the uncertainty in her voice.

Piper moved back slowly and stared blankly back at them. She shrugged but I recognised that dangerous spark in her eyes. She knew she had them.

"Maybe you're right. But is that really something you want to try me on?" The other girls in the line muttered impressed as she walked to a table. I smiled stunned after her. Maybe I was wrong about her. Maybe she was fit for prison after all.

"Hey" I turned back to Gina and was disappointed when my tray remained empty beside Norma, "Get a leash for your bitch. Ain't nobody taking her serious round here. Especially not Red"

"I know. But you gotta let her have her moment..."

I sighed and glanced back at red. She crossed her arms and gave me a waiting look. I scoffed and looked down at the food again

"You know I think I've lost my appetite. Food looks like baby vomit"

I turned my back on Red but I could still feel her anger stabbing knives into my back as I made my way over to Piper's table. I sat down beside Boo and her new puppy so I could be opposite Piper. I patted the retriever's head and smiled at the blonde when she looked back from her conversation with Boo and Yoga and saw me without food. She looked back at the kitchen with a deep frown

"Are they seriously still going to starve you?!" She asked outraged.

I looked back down at the dog and shrugged.

"Looks like democracy isn't a thing here. Sorry Pipes"

She slammed her hand on the table and made to stand up, "I'm gonna talk with Red"

"Hey! Whoa!" I grabbed her hand and pulled her back down, "Don't give her a reason to starve you too. I'll square with Red, don't worry"

Piper stared sadly back at me, "How?" She asked gently touching my hand. I watched her fingers brush mine. They felt soft and kind. I'd missed that.

"I don't know" I admitted lifting my fingers to touch her back. I smiled when she did, "Maybe Red needs another foot rub" I joked drawing circles on her palm.

Piper laughed and looked down. Her hand froze under mine suddenly like she just realised what we were doing. She slowly withdrew her hand and slid it under the table. I took mine back too and crossed my arms on the table with a look around. Everybody looked happy eating away. God I hated them all.

"Here" I looked back at her and tilted my head at her offering me her cornbread

"What's this?" I asked taking it off her. Piper shrugged

"You gave me yours once and-"

"And you threw it in the trash" I cut in. She ignored me.

"And I don't want to sit here and eat while you go hungry. It's not nice"

I laughed and looked down at my fingers tearing the bread apart.

"It's prison. What's nice about it?" I asked sarcastically. I didn't expect her to reply. But she did.

"You"

I blinked and looked up at her. She was watching me with a sincere smile. My heart jumped up into my throat with her compliment. I wondered whether she truly meant it. I recovered from my shock and leant back and tipped my head at her

"Correct" I told her flashing her a little smirk. She kicked me under the table and I laughed before I gently bumped my knee against hers

"Thank you" I told her nodding at the bread. She nodded back at me like it was nothing and I looked down at it with a grin when she shyly looked away.

I nibbled a little on the stale bread and phased in and out of the table conversation. They were talking about trying to persuade Healy to get something in for the inmates. I wasn't paying it much attention. My focus was entirely on Piper. Like always. She contributed happily in their talk with a bright smile when they accepted her ideas weren't so bad. It was cute how she tried to fit in despite knowing she never would.

Piper left the discussion after a while and stared vacantly down at her food with a thoughtful look before she started grinning to herself. I smiled at her

"What?" I asked raising another piece of the bread to my mouth. Piper shrugged and told me it was nothing. So I bumped her knee again

"Tell me"

"I was just thinking about that time in Rio. You know when that really camp busking couple came over and offered to dance on the table for a coffee?"

I shook my head at her,"I don't remember that"

Her smile fell a little and she stared hard at the table,

"Oh" she said, "That must have been just me then.."

I heard the loneliness in her voice and easily matched it with the thousands of times I'd heard it before when i'd left her to explore on her own so I could work. Piper was staring lost inside her thoughts. I knew she was still thinking about it. How could she look so alone about it all this time later? It made no sense to me. She was like elastic. She could easily snap back to herself. It hurt watching her relive those moments.

"Did I hear that right, chapman? Gay guys danced for you for a free coffee?" Nicky dumped herself onto the seat beside me and stole a piece of my bread. Piper watched her do it with an irritated look before she gave the girl a smile.

"Yeah, they did. I bought them two coffees and a sandwich for it"

I chuckled, "Must have been impressive dancing"

"It was. If you'd been there you'd know"

I rolled my eyes at her. Straight back to the cold wall again. I hated fucking boomeranging with her.

Nicky let out a low whistle "I'm sensing some friction here... Maybe you guys should talk it out. Right here, right now. Just vent" We both looked back at her and she laughed, "What? You're worried about us? We won't say anything. Just observe"

"No thanks" Piper mumbled.

I scoffed at her, "Figures" I said under my breath.

She looked up at me and Nicky laughed

"Man you two have some shit that needs ironing out"

"We do not!" Piper snapped loudly at her. I stayed quiet despite wanting to call her out on it. I'd never hear the end of it if we started an argument right now. Not from Piper or Nicky.

"Right..."

Piper glared at Nicky, "We do not have shit that needs ironing. We are fine. Alex and I are friends now. That's all there is to it. We don't have anything more to say"

"Looks like Vause disagrees.." Nicky bumped my arm snd I looked away from turning my bread into a pile of crumbs to Nicky's grin. She nodded back at Piper and told me to get it out already. Piper was watching me too, wondering if Nicky was right. I looked away again, refusing to respond.

"Alex?" Piper touched my hand again, stopping it from making even more mess with the bread. I looked up at her and rolled my eyes at the sad look she was giving me. I was not falling for that.

"Don't you two have work?" I asked trying to steer the conversation off me.

Nicky laughed to herself and stood up, defeated. "Unfortunately, babe of mystery here is right"

"What?" We both said looking up at her. Nicky just winked at me and hauled Piper out of her seat. She ignored Piper's speech on not being finished with her food and pushed her a step towards the door.

"Let's go before Luescheck sends his army of vodka bottles out to get us. See you later, Vause"

I nodded and waved them away. Piper looked like she wanted to say something but Nicky quickly pushed her out of the cafeteria with a bored expression that offered no explanation for for her behaviour. When Morello sat down in Piper's vacant seat though I knew what was happening.

"Hi Lorna" I sighed tiredly and leant back readying myself for the inquisition. She slowly smiled back at me

"You know how this goes, Vause. I ask questions. Nicky asks questions. Eventually one of you cracks and we piece it all together to make a lovely painting" I rolled my eyes and she giggled, "Hey I'm just joking! Nicky might want me to interrogate you but I ain't no snoop"

"Then what do you want?" I asked frowning. Morello smiled and pulled Piper's tray towards her, "Chapman's pancake"

She stood up with the tray smiling to herself. She didn't fool me though. She didn't want leftovers at all. If she did she could grab them fresh from the kitchens, not off pipers plate. Red had sent her to take away any food I might be getting. I looked down at the cornbread and realised why it hasn't been taken off me too. In my stress I'd reduced it to a pile of finite crumbs.

Perfect. Another day without food. Why was this becoming habit for me?

* * *

"You know, I pray for all the dead babies and all their baby souls. And God, he's gonna let them into heaven, even though they weren't baptized" she sniffed and looked down at leanne writing beside her,

"Are you getting all of this?" She asked completely fine again. I rolled my eyes.

"Yeah" Leanne replied chewing on her pen lid. Pensatucky nodded happy and moved away to stretch inside the dryer. I thought about how nice and easy it'd be to push her in and lock the door on her. I bet she'd shit herself.

"And you can also tell Judy that I pray for her as well" she said pulling a couple shirts out. Leanne looked confused.

"Well, her name's Barbara" she said. Pensatucky frowned down at her

"Barbara?"

Leanne nodded and held the letter up for tucky to see herself, "Barbara"

"Damn!" Pensatucky threw the clothes down and slammed her hand against the dryer door, " I can't keep all this fan mail straight! I cant- I cant keep up with it!"

"What? You have fans?" I asked sarcatically. Their eyes turned back to me.

"She's a hero!" leanne cried and i scoffed in disbelief, "She's a defender of the unborn!"

"Jeez, that sounds like a bad X-Men movie. What'd you do, bomb an abortion clinic?"

Pensatucky ignored me so i could guess i was right. Fucking hicks.

She looked down and tapped leannes shoulder to get her writing again. The other girl quickly got back to it. Her nose pretty much smudged the page as she poised herself ready. Pensatucky looked up at me before she spoke

"And you can sign off with, 'I will be out of here by 2015. Before the rapture'"

I let out a laugh, "Oh, man" I chuckled fully amused.

"Is something fucking funny to you?" she snapped irritably. I just kept laughing. I glanced up at her simmering expression and nodded at her.

"Yeah. It's just that people predict the rapture all the time. I mean, wasn't that supposed to happen in 2011?"

The other girls turned back to pensatucky for her answer and the sudden attention had her stuttering on the spot. I mentally high-fived myself. Point to Alex.

"No" she said looking around uneasy, "No it comes in two stages. If you study your shit! The first one was a spiritual rapture. And the second one coming is a physical one"

"Ah, " I replied bored, "I see. Got it"

"And you're not invited, because they don't allow gay people on the rapture bus!" She snapped angrilly.

I met her furious scowl and blinked at her before i looked down at leanne who was looking a little uncomfortable with where the conversation was going.

"There's a bus? Are all the seats already taken by Appalachian meth-heads?"

That pissed tucky off. She finished folding a shirt and threw it on the table beside leanne who jumped in her seat startled

"Oh, man, you're gonna..You're just gonna get it, Vause, aren't you? Do we have to go back to the dryer?"

"You already locked me in that fucking dryer" I reminded her shortly when she smacked it in threat.

"Yeah, maybe I'll fucking turn it on this time. Make you spin around like a gerbil. Wanna know why?" She took a step closer and glared back at me, "'Cause I've had it with rich bitches like you"

I tilted my head at her and stared coldly into her hazel eyes. She took a couple uneasy steps back, retreating like a fucking coward. Was that what they thought? I was rich? Based on what? The fact I was educated and still owned all my teeth?

I just scoffed at her and returned to my work. Fucking bitch had no clue. No fucking clue at all.

"Exactly how rich are you?" Angie asked quietly beside me.

I stopped folding and pressed my hands against the tabletop, using the cold surface to cool my anger

"I'm not" I mumbled. Across the room tucky scoffed

"Yeah right you aren't. That's why you walk around acting like-"

"Like what?" I snapped edging round the table suddenly. It filled me with immense satisfaction when they all jumped,

"D'you wanna know something, Tiffany? I am just like you. I have to scrape and save to make it through life, just like everybody else here. I don't own my own house. I wasn't brought up in a fucking mansion and I am not distantly related to royalty. Hard as it may seem to believe"

They all stared at me a second before I turned and left the room. Fuçk them and fuck work. I left the laundry room and walked down the hall to the chapel. I was so mad I felt like hitting something. If I ran into somebody I was sure bound to start a fight.

I kicked a chair over when I entered the silent room and breathed a little deeply to calm myself down. I hated those stupid bitches. All of them.

_"Don't you listen to them smarty-pants assholes. They're gonna have boring lives. You are cool" _

I closed my eyes shut and leant my hands against the nearest chair for support. My mom's voice filled my head telling me to ignore everybody else. I felt my breaths turn ragged suddenly. I squeezed my eyes and gripped the chair tighter to stop from crying. Why did I have to think about her right now?

_"Alex, people are gonna be assholes. They're gonna call you out on bullshit all the time. And why? Because they're fucking jealous. And who wouldn't be? You're young, you're successful...Even if you refuse to tell me what you do for work. If you're happy then who gives a shit what anybody else thinks, huh? Aren't you happy?" _

"No" I mumbled shuddering a little on the spot.

My mom's words echoed around me as if she'd just spoken them aloud to me. In my head I saw her watching me carefully as I struggled to stay together. I knew she'd have said something pretty similar if she were here right now. She might even go kick those laundry whores to the ground too. I chuckled tearfully. She'd make them pay for what they said alright.

_"You and me, kid, long as we have each other, fuck the rest"_

I stood up straight and wiped my eyes. I stared numbly at the stain glass window. I had to fight my own battles, I knew that. And in this place I had to be extra careful. But they'd pay for what they said. I'd make sure of it.

I walked back to the door, stopping to pick up the chair I kicked over, and quietly left the chapel. I didn't go back to work. I couldn't handle another two hours of those bitches. Instead I walked to the rec room knowing that some party was being set up for tastee's leaving. All while my mom's words rolled on repeat inside my mind. Maybe watching a happy moment would make me feel better. Or depress me more. Either way it kicked the hell out of hanging around with the hicks.

I lingered by the door and peered in at them all. It was mostly black ladies hanging around talking or making up posters to tack to the walls. Somebody was even looping toilet paper through the window bars like I had before. But a few white girls were mingling too. I watched amused as boo tried to chat up some girl in the corner. Yoga was helping a few girls put posters up. Even the nun was there talking to an older lady in the back. And by the window painting on some paper was piper.

I felt myself smile as my eyes drifted over her. Her hair was shorter and curled a little. And she pretty much glowed. It made my heart go dizzy seeing her like that. She was so beautiful.

"You look like JonBenet Ramsey" I told her as i walked over behind her and observed her work. She was trying to tack a sign to the wall but was struggling to get it up right. Piper looked over her shoulder at me and laughed at my sarcasm

"Well, that's what I was going for" she chuckled, "Can you hold this for me?"

I nodded and immediately stepped forward to help. I was glad she seemed to have calmed down since breakfast. Her little makeover must have helped. I was happy for it. I hated her being mad at me.

She raised the other end of the sign and passed it to me, fingers brushing mine as she smiled. I smiled down at her as I took it and I moved to the wall to hold it up for her. I read it and smiled at her

"Did you make this?"

"Mmm-hmm. It's my second attempt" she looked down at the table where a replica sign sat half finished, "I spelt it wrong the first time"

I chuckled softly at her, "And they say you went to college"

She laughed with me and finished tacking the paper to the wall. I looked around while she did and took in all the crappy decorations and signs. It reminded me of mercys leaving party. It seemed so long ago now.

"God" I sighed and looked back at her, "I hate seeing people go. It reminds me how much time I have left"

"Yeah, but think of the story that you'll have" I grinned and pointed back at her

"That is my line"

She grinned at me, "I know it is. You always trot it out in times of suckiness"

I smiled "Yeah"

"Like that stomach virus I had in Java"

"Oh, it was a great fucking story. The whole village came out to watch you poop"

We laughed and she nodded at me, "So maybe this is kind of like that"

She smiled at me and moved a little closer. I loved how she did that now. She was fine about getting as close as possible despite how it looked. Always telling herself it was within the friendship boundaries. But it never was. Nicky never got this close. Lorna didn't. I'd never let them. But piper was different. And I totally didn't want to tell her to stop. I was all up for encouraging it.

I smiled down at her, eyes watching hers again. We only looked away when Poussey ran into the room grinning.

"Yo, she coming, y'all!" She started up a chant of tastee's name and the room followed her until the girl herself bounded in happy.

"I'm getting out, bitches!" She cried bouncing on the spot. The other girls cheered at her, happy she'd been given her freedom. Personally I was jealous as hell. Which meant they had to be too but hey, as long as one of us was getting out of here.

Boo left her fuck to be and walked up to tastee with a grin of her own as she hugged the girl,

"Yeah. Fight the power! Fuck the man!"

"Hey!" Mendez gave her a warning look and boo backed off with a smirk, "Watch it" he growled.

Somebody put the stereo on in the corner and I looked back at piper when it felt familiar. She was dancing a little on the spot and it made me smile.

"My God, do you remember this?" I asked her. A memory was flashing behind my eyes as I listened to the music.

"Yes!" She grinned, dancing still.

I turned towards her and tried to remember how that specific dance routine had gone.

"I don't even know how the arms go. I think like..." Piper knew exactly what I was doing. She turned to face the same way as me and it showed how much more she remembered than me by the way she was able to hop straight into that dance we'd thought up years ago.

I grinned at her and copied her every move until I was dancing in time with her. Behind us I heard the other women laughing

"What the fuck?" Poussey chuckled as we turned, "Shit, these white girls trying to throw down!"

I barely registered their amused mutterings. I was lost in pipers eyes as she danced with me. I was trying to remind myself it was just a dance, all friendly and all, but that got thrown out the window the second she moved closer suddenly. I smiled down at her when her head brushed mine, eyes watching me steadily while she smirked with her dance. Maybe she knew what it was doing to me. Maybe she was lost inside the memory of it too.

Pipers body moved peacefully in time with my own. It made me forget about prison. It made me forget the other women. When she danced like that she looked like she had years ago. All vibrant and cheeky. It made me miss her even more in a way.

She turned around with the beat and I bit my lip hesitant before I pulled her gently back into me.

* * *

_Her hand raised up to cup my neck while I pressed her against me. Her head tipped. Her body leant harder into mine, swaying with the music slow music coming from the speakers. I smirked to myself and stroked my thumb against the hot skin on her waist where her shirt was riding up. _

_"Having fun?" I asked in a husky voice. I kissed her ear while she shrugged back at me and my smile widened happily. _

_"Could have fooled me" I told her. Piper let out a tiny moan and I chuckled. _

_"I've decided I love Cambodia" she told me tilting her head further away from me to give me access to her neck. I ignored that though. I loved to tease her. _

_"Do.. Do we have to go tomorrow? I mean can't Fahri-"_

_"Babe" she sighed and I closed my eyes briefly before I kissed her neck and gently span her around. She looked up at me all depressed and pouting. And I hated that. _

_"Hey" I stroked her cheek and tipped her chin up so I could kiss her. I smiled when her smile flavoured my lips, "One more stop and we have the entire rest of the year to ourselves. Just you and me. We can go wherever you want. You decide" _

_"Just you and me?" She repeated skeptical, her eyes listing towards the bar where a couple guys from the cartel were sat watching us. I knew she hated them being around. I fucking did too. _

_"Yeah," I said giving the guys a strong look that had them immediately getting up and leaving the beach. I turned my attention back to her when they left, "You and me, kid. For an entire nine months. How will you survive that I wonder" _

_She tapped my arm, "Stop it. You I can handle. It's just.. The rest of it.." _

_I nodded. I understood her aversion to the cartel. After everything she'd seen she deserved to hate it. I did too. _

_I let her twirl herself around again so we were both facing the sea. The waves softly lapped at the beach while a slow breeze tickled our skin. It was cold but I didn't mind. I just kept my arms wrapped firmly around pipers shoulders so she stayed warm. She leant back into me and looked up at the stars with a long breath. She nodded. _

_"Okay" was all she said._

_ I grinned and kissed her neck, slowly, arms moving down to wrap around her waist. She let out a content breath. I'd been nervous she'd say no. I new how much she missed home. I wouldn't be surprised if she asked to spend the next nine months back in the states. _

_"Where is this last stop?" She asked curious. I grinned into her skin and gently kissed my way up to her ear. I'd been keeping it a secret on purpose just to surprise her. _

_"A little place known as the city of romance.."_

_"Venice?" She asked in a totally fake voice. I rolled my eyes at her _

_"Paris, dumbass. As in France" _

_She span around, "no way?!" _

_I smirked back at her and kissed her, "oui, mon cherié" _

_Pipers smile twitched under my mouth. She kissed me back happily with a thoughtful hum_

_"You suck at accents" she told me giggling when I groaned frustrated. She kissed my cheek knowing I'd stop being grumpy and started to sway to the music again. Her hands pressed into my back and coaxed me into swaying with her when I simply stood there. I met her slight smile and chuckled to myself before I let myself move with her. _

_"Where after Paris?" She asked. _

_I closed my eyes tiredly and rested my head against hers. The music started up a new dancing beat much heavier than the one before and everybody else still half cut on the beach started dancing. I guess we just hit morning in Cambodia. _

_I sighed annoyed with them all before I answered her. _

_"I've kinda always wanted to see Rome" I told her dreamily. In my head I was picturing being there with her. Holidaying not working. It looked like a sweet deal in my head "And China.."_

_"Thailand and Egypt.." She added just as dreamily as me_

_"Athens.."_

_"Australia.."_

_"Ireland" _

_Piper giggled with that last one and I opened my eyes to look down at her. She looked amused by my suggestion. And curious. She gave me this look that asked why I wanted to see it. I shrugged _

_"It looks pretty. Besides," I kissed her and pressed her into me some more, "you can't deny the Irish accent is super fucking hot" _

_She gently slapped my shoulder, "you're not supposed to be thinking that" _

_"Oh? And whys that?" _

_"Because you love me. Or so you say" _

_I chuckled, "I do love you, pipes. But.." I leant away with a cheeky grin, "I love hot Irish women more" _

_She slapped me again harder and it had me chuckling. We stopped swaying and just stood looking at each other and smiling. Pipes looked away after a moment and I let myself look around for the cartel boys. _

_"Cmon" she said tugging on my hands. I looked back at her and tilted my head amused when she hopped on the spot. It took me a moment to realise she was hopping to the music. _

_"What're you doing?" I chuckled _

_"We are going to dance" _

_"Isn't that what we've been doing all night?" I asked pointing at the slow sunrise beginning over the sea. She ignored me and tapped my arm _

_"I think we should make our own dance up"_

_"Why?" _

_"Because it's fun! And in ten years time when we hear this incredibly cool song, which will be completely outdated and forgotten about by then, we can do this dance and remember every second of tonight" _

_I smiled at her and nodded, "okay but if you ever manage to collapse from exhaustion from today don't expect me to carry you back to the apartment. You can sleep on the sand" _

_"I love you" she grinned giving me a quick kiss. I beamed back at her_

_"Love you too, kid. Cmon then, what's this dance?" _

* * *

"Chapman!"

Piper froze behind me. Somehow we'd managed to turn a harmless dance into something completely raunchy. No regrets here at all. We all looked up at the door where Healy stood looking like he was about to pop a few veins in his head.

"Get over here!" he barked.

Piper looked back at me a second before she made her way over to him smiling like a schoolgirl being told off by her teacher. The others mumbled about the party being over as she did. A few even mumbled how mad he looked. I felt myself get edgy. They were right about that. This felt like something bad was going to happen.

When piper reached him his eyes cut back to me and I realised just how furious he looked.

"We were just-"

"Shut your mouth, Chapman!" He growled viscously over her, "You think it's appropriate to violate your fellow inmate?" He questioned.

I stared at him. Im pretty sure we all did.

"Violate? We were just dancing"

"I said shut your mouth!"

"You asked me a question!" She flared back at him. He glared at her before he turned slightly to Mendez.

"That looked like attempted rape to me. Take her to SHU"

Pornstache looked back at him, "Uh, What?"

_Yeah, what?! _

"You can't do that!" Piper panicked. Mendez nodded

"Yeah, she's kind of right"

"Shut up, Mendez! You know, I'm tired of your shit. I'm your superior fucking officer! Now, you put her in the goddamn box, or I will fucking write you up, too!"

PIper looked like she was going into shock, "No, no, no, no"

"She didn't even do anything!" I started taking a step forward. Healy pointed back at me with a mad glare

"Step back! Or I will cite you for assaulting an officer"

Was it just me or did it look like he was taking all this personally?

I swallowed my snarky reply. He looked pretty serious. In fact the guy looked fuçking insane. I loved piper and I didn't want to see her in the shu but I didn't want to go too. I told myself I could get her out if I was free of that hell. It was the only way to stop me feeling selfish about it.

Somebody snagged my arm when his expression darkened and I let them pull me back over to the group of women standing in shock. When I looked back I saw it was Poussey shaking her head telling me to leave it. At the front piper was freaking out. I closed my eyes at the fear in her voice. I couldn't stand it. This was torture.

"I have visitation today. Larry's coming to see me. You can't do this!"

Pornstache gripped pipers arms tighter and it took everything in me not to walk up and deck him when I saw her wince in pain. He hauled her a step to the left and around Healy,

"It's all right. Let's do what the man says before he has an aneurysm. Come on"

He started to haul her out of the room and she struggled to get free. She looked terrified. "Please don't do this!" She screamed at Healy as Mendez pulled her away. Her eyes touched mine before she was yanked out of the room still screaming at Healy. He looked back at us when her screams faded down the corridor. His eyes flickered around us nervously like he expected us to say something. When we didn't he turned on his heel and walked off.

Pensatucky caught my attention when I watched him go. I never saw her walk in before. She must have snuck in. She smirked lowly at me, happily like she'd just seen a plan play itself out. I glared over at her. This had her written all over it and it was only confirmed when she clapped her hands happy and left the room. Leanne gave me an apologetic look before she followed.

I took a sharp step after them but two pairs of hands gripped my arms to stop me

"Hey man, I know she you girl and everything but you do not want to tango with Healy right now"

"Hmm mm" tastee said in agreement to Poussey, "He looked ready to blow up just now. Can you imagine what he'll do if you charge in demanding chapman be free?"

"I'm not just going to stand here!" I told them yanking my arms free. They let me go and I turned to face them, "Would you if it were you two?"

Tastee frowned confused. Poussey let out a nervous laugh, "What you talkin bout man? We jus friends"

I rolled my eyes at them and stormed out of the room. I went straight to Healy's office. I kicked the door open and stood cross armed in front of his desk. He looked up from an open file on his desk and glared at me

"What do you think you're-"

"What is your fucking problem?" I demanded cutting him off, "We were just dancing and you fucking know it!"

"If you don't leave this office this second-"

"You'll what? Throw me on ice too? We both know you could have done that before. So why send only piper to the shu?"

His eyes averted mine and he shifted in his seat uncomfortably. I realised suddenly. And I laughed

"Oh you have got to be kidding me!" He liked her didn't he? He fucking fancied piper. Shit that was too funny!

His eyes snapped back to me and he glared, "I'm gonna give you one last warning, Vause-"

"Have you been imagining what it'd be like?" I asked leaning on the desk, "What she feels like when you touch her? What she kisses like?" He swallowed and I grinned, "It's incredibly good" I shared watching him squirm, "Like fucking heaven. Not that you'll ever know. Because she is never going to fuck you. This fucked idea you got going?" I shook my head and turned to leave

"Vause!" I stopped with my hand on the door, "You're getting shot for this" he warned viscously.

I suppressed a smile. Was that all he had? I gave him a cold look over my shoulder. I pressed a hand to my heart and sighed

"Ouch. That really hurt"

I left his office and slammed the door extra hard. I wasn't entirely sure what just happened or why I said what I did. It wasn't a threat but Healy was psycho. What I just did might have made it worse for piper. And I'd realised that way too late.

"Shit!" I slammed my fist into the wall closest to me. Why was I such an impulsive idiot?!

Somebody touched my arm and asked if i was okay. I didn't have to look up to know who it was.

"They sent her to the shu" I mumbled to the two women stood beside me.

"Chapman?" Morello squeaked in surprise. I nodded and Nicky squeezed my shoulder. When I looked up she was looking scared. Like she didn't think piper would be okay.

"What? What is that look?"

She blinked and forced a smile, "This look? This is my lady killer look" she tapped morello who jumped in nodding

"Oh yeah, she always looks like that"

I shrugged Nicky off me

"Stop fuçking with me. Is piper going to be okay?" I asked staring at her. She let out a breath and looked back at me with this apology in her eyes. Almost as if piper had died. I swallowed. Was it that bad there? Nicky nodded.

"I ain't gonna lie, Vause, it's not good. Pray she's only down there for a while"

"What happens if she's there longer?" i asked fear gripping my bones tight.

Nicky looked back at morello before she told me to just hope pipers stay there was short. I couldn't do that though. I had to get her out.

"Alex, where you going?" Lorna called rushing after me when I started walking towards Caputos office.

"Vause, man, cmon!" Nicky growled following.

"What they're doing is illegal. I'm not letting her stay down there" I banged on Caputos door and stood back to wait for him. Lorna was shifting nervous beside me

"Maybe this ain't a good idea" she hissed fidgeting with her hair. Nicky agreed with her

"You start fussing they'll stick you down there too"

I laughed, "For what? Helping a friend?" I banged on the door again but he still didn't answer. Fucking asshole was probably busy playing with his bloody plants. Nicky pulled my hand down from opening the door myself

"If they threw her in there for something Healy made up, what stops them doing the same to you?"

I stared at her serious eyes and slowly digested what she said. She was right. If they could lock piper up for dancing what would they do to me for shouting about it? I stood down with Nickys logic and allowed her and lorna to walk me away.

We all jumped when we turned and found a guard there watching us.

"What's going on?" She asked slowly with suspicious eyes. I felt Nickys arms brush my back as she reached around it to tap lorna. The Italian took my wrist as Nicky walked forward to the guard

"Hey Fischer. We was just chatting. Nothing in the book about that is there?"

"Well actually-"

"Good. Well, we'll just be moving on now" Nicky took hold of my other wrist and took a step forward. Fischer stopped us though

"Are you okay Alex?" She asked. When I looked up at her she was peering at me concerned. And I figured she could help me.

"No. Where's Caputo?"

She frowned, "He's at a meeting in the city. Why? What's wrong?"

"Oh nothing" lorna tried to breeze but I spoke over her

"Healy just threw chapman into the shu for dancing and I think Caputo should know his staff are breaking the law"

Fischer looked completely shocked, "oh my god are you serious?" I nodded and she straightened up with a hard look, "Leave it with me" she stormed down the hall towards healy's office and we all stared after her.

Nicky let out a low whistle, "Baby officer seriously skyrocketed in hotness" she said smiling to herself.

"Even I wanna do her" lorna agreed, immediately getting Nicky jealous. I ignored them both and span on my heel.

"Alex?.. Alex!" I ignored them as I strode into Caputos office and grabbed a pencil from the cup on the desk. The two girls whispered at me from the door, scared we'd all get into trouble

"You're gonna get us all locked in the fucking shu!" Nicky growled coming in to drag me out. I pushed her off and continued to write my note to Caputo. I trusted Fischer but I knew she wouldn't get anywhere with Healy. Caputo had to know about this.

"Nicky! Somebody's coming!" Lorna squeaked suddenly from the door. Nicky and I both looked up and exchanged a worried glance.

"Well do something!" The redhead snapped back at her, grabbing my wrist. Lorna dithered on the spot for a second and hopped into the room, quickly closing the door behind her. We both stared at her.

"What? You said do something!" She whispered. Nicky closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose.

"I meant distract whoever it is coming this way" she sighed. Obviously she was tired of morellos simple mind. Lorna leant back elated

"Oh.. Okay" she turned to go back out and we both grabbed her to stop her leaving again.

"Just be quiet" I told them when they started to squabble.

I walked to the door and pressed my ear against it to listen to the hall outside. I rolled my eyes when the other two stood and crouched beside me to do the same. Nicky smiled at me when I looked back at her annoyed

"Hey, it was your idea to play break and enter!" she whispered quietly chuckling when I poked her, "Why're you so worked up about this?"

I met her eyes. I didn't need to say because she knew. Nicky sighed and looked down at morello frowning to herself as she listened outside.

"Straight girls" she mumbled to me. I nodded at her.

"I think it's clear" morello whispered tapping our legs.

I gently pushed Nicky back and slowly opened the door a crack to check the coast was clear. I'd just started to creep out when Luescheck rounded the corner. He stopped when he saw me frozen to the spot, the door behind me opened with me half out of it.

"What're you doing?" He asked sticking his hands into his pockets. I heard Nicky and morello whispering in the room behind me and quickly shut the door so he wouldn't find them too.

"Leaving a note for Caputo" I was already in trouble. Telling the truth wouldn't kill me. Luescheck frowned and shrugged

"Whatever. You want to avoid the shu?" I blinked at him. He wasn't going to stick me in there anyway? I crossed my arms and waited.

"I've got a shit ton of laundry in my van that needs doing. You fix it for me and I'll forget I ever saw you in that office"

I nodded straight away and he grinned. He turned on the spot and nodded out the building

"Let's go then, inmate"

I almost couldn't believe my luck as I followed him out. Turning back before I exited the prison I saw Lorna and Nicky staring after me. They couldn't believe it either.


	11. Chapter 11

**_Hey people, missed me? Im sorry its been a while! I kinda bought a new guitar and let it distract me. Dont hate me guys, its a pretty guitar xD _**

**_Now then, on to the crazy fiction. There won't be a Moscow Mule chapter. I read the story over and realised I spliced some scenes into the WAC ep, ergo I have a get out clause. But I will be adding the other bits to past and future chapters. So you'll still have to go back at some point to see them. Or not if you don't wanna. Its literally going to be write ups of the ep scenes. Nothing exciting. But for this update there will be references to Mule. So just pretend like I didn't mess up and you read it. Again this isn't the end of Fucksgiving! But hang in there! We'll be hitting the juicy episodes very soon, I promise! _**

**_Hopefully this chapter is okay. its a bit everywhere... I kinda wrote it at the gym (as ya doooo) I'll edit some time maybe. The song today is; Waiting by Jamie Campbell Bower. You'll need to Youtube the song. Tab in On't Sofa and you'll find it. I hope ya'll enjoy season 3 and party like hell over the fact they've started filming season 4 (YES!) Happy readings!_**

* * *

Luescheck walked me to his van to pick up his shit ton of washing and then marched me to laundry to make sure I wouldn't run off with his tighty whities. He spent the entire walk back cracking lame prison jokes and asking if I'd ever tried huffing paint thinner. Irritating only began to cover it. I was so wound up about Piper and worrying whether she was okay I barely paid him attention. Luckily Luescheck so busy babbling shit he didn't notice.

"Seriously, I tried it once watching that fucking film.. Uh.." He squeezed his eyes shut and clicked his fingers, "You know. The totally fucked one... Argh what's it's name?!.. Uh.. Fuck! Um.."

I watched him grow frustrated, satisfied a little with it. He frowned at the floor still clicking and then he grinned and snapped his fingers at me,

"Human centipede! That one. Man that was fucking trippy!"

"Huffing barely gets you high" I replied completely bored with the small talk.

"It does if you keep it up" he grinned at me. I shrugged back. I didn't care about it at all.

"You know I know Nicky was in that room with you, right?" He said stopping outside the laundry room while I lagged behind with his laundry. I hefted the bin bag of washing back over my shoulder and nodded at him.

"But she's your friend. So why punish her, right?"

Luescheck smiled, "Is that jealousy I detect?"

I scoffed. Was he for real? Luescheck held his hands up at my reply.

"Hey don't take it personally. You're not here because you're not my friend. You're here because obviously it was your idea to break into Caputo's office. Nicky, blonde as she gets most of the time, isn't that dumb. And honestly I didn't have you up for it either. But somebody's gotta pay. And plus you're laundry so it kinda makes sense"

I rolled my eyes and moved past him to go into the room. I was done with the crappie lecture.

Luescheck pulled his arm up though and stopped me. He gave me this serious look all of a sudden and it actually managed to have me worried.

"I covered for you this time because of Nicky" He let out a deep breath and scratched his head, "You're right, she's my friend. In some sick twisted way that means that sometimes I have to look out for her and her.." He looked me over with a frown, "amazing pals.." I let out a breath of irritation and he shifted himself so he looked taller, "But I catch you fucking the rules again? You'll go to the shu. And I know that's what you want seeing as your little blonde wife is all locked up. But trust me. It is not The Four Seasons down there"

I swallowed at how dead serious he seemed. His eyes stared at me like they'd seen what shu was like. And they said it was really _really_ bad.

I nodded at him, "Why're you telling me this?"

"Because," he stepped away with a smirk, "I hate to see the hot ones turn crazy"

He winked at me then and strolled off, telling me to "Have a good day, Betty Page!"

I turned on the spot and watched him go. I didn't get how in three seconds he went from being friendly and nearly likeable to being a complete dick. How could Nicky be pals with that? I shook my head after him. What an ass.

Deciding I better get on with work before he came back I hiked the bin bag over my shoulder again and let out a strained breath as I stepped back to turn around. My shoulder knocked into something mid turn though and I tripped a little with a stuttered ycuss for whoever it was I'd stumbled into. I regretted it almost instantly.

"Are you done causing trouble for yourself yet? Because I really need to have that word, Vause"

My eyes flew heavenward and I cursed the universe for this shit luck it kept dropping over my head. I turned back to the Russian and held up my baggage.

"Kind of working, Red"

"I can see" she cooed sympathetically, "Laundry must be so hard for somebody with your wasted talents"

I frowned at her, "My wasted talents?"

Red nodded with a kind smile. And it freaked me to fucking shit. She took a tiny step forward and continued to smile sweetly at me. I stood my ground against her and that seemed to piss her off more.

"You know what I mean. Talking with people. Manipulating them. Hiding secrets. Sneaking things in. That.. sort.." she crept right into my space and tapped the bag in my hand, "of thing"

Her eyes stared straight up at me. Brown Russian glowing red with simmering anger. I shook my head at her

"I don't have a clue what you're talking about"

I turned around with the bag and started walking into laundry. Red impatiently called me back.

"Import" she said watching me turn curious back to her, "I'm talking about import. Had any sweet deals lately, Vause?"

She was watching me for a reaction, hoping she'd hit the right button with her little speech. But for what? Why did she want to know any of that? That shit was way in the past as far as I was concerned. I was far more focused on getting out of here.

"Look, Red, you're after something. I get that much from this whole brooding starey grandma thing-"

"Grandma thing?!" She repeated frowning disbelieving. I ignored her and carried on

"But I have absolutely no idea what the fuck you are talking about"

"Don't play games, Vause!" She growled shoving me back a pace. My back hit the door but I didn't do anything back. I shouldn't mess with her. I knew that. Still, it was tempting.

Red glared me down and walked up to me, stretching on her toes to get up in my face. I tried to act cool but fuck she was terrifying when she wanted to be. I could see now why everybody avoided her anger. Who wouldn't?

"You're avoiding answers but I know it was you"

"Know what was me?!" I snapped back annoyed. I was sick of this whole catch-22 attempt.

She tipped her head and stared at me with a dead gleam of danger in her eyes. It warned me to shut up before she got really mad.

"You know, little girls that like fire really shouldn't play with matches"

Again, completely lost. She ignored my perplexed reaction and carried on,

"You're in the real house now, Vause. My house. And you play roulette with a Russian you're going to fucking lose. Remember that"

She slowly turned away and walked off down the hall with her hands in her hoody. I stared after her and breathed a little deeply. Man that was fucking scary shit! What the holy fuck had I done to deserve that kind of threat from her?! I thought over my actions in the past week but nothing came up at all. Up until now I'd been the model prisoner. So what was her problem? I frowned hard and decided to ask Nicky later. Maybe Red was having family issues and blaming me.

Pensatucky was leant up against the washers talking with Leanne when I eventually got over myself and entered the room. The washers were all on making it hard to hear what she said at first. But it didn't take a fucking genius to figure it out.

I stopped by the fence with luescheck's washing and watched them a moment. My eyes zeroed completely on the bible queen as she danced about happy with herself. My fist curled around the bin bag I was still holding. I had no idea what red's problem was but at the moment I was ready to settle this inbred punk first.

She had a smug smile and she laughed gleefully as she bragged about what she'd done. Leanne didn't look like she was listening. She just stood in the corner stroking her fingers against the tabletop. In fact thinking about it Leanne looked just as pissed as I felt. Was it because pensatucky had publicly acted on her hate against us gays? Maybe. I hoped so anyway. I could use somebody on my side for once.

Neither of them noticed me as dumped the bag and leant up against a washer. They were too absorbed in themselves to worry about being overheard. Fucking tits.

"Man! Did you see their faces?!" Tucky grinned and pulled a panicked expression, "_No! You can't throw me in the shu! Ah! Somebody help me_!"

I squeezed my hand into a fist under my crossed arms when she carried on mocking piper. I wanted so bad to walk over and fucking kill her. Good thing Fahri and Kubra taught me reservation was the first key in the lock of revenge. Otherwise she'd be bleeding out right now. It relieved me somewhat picturing in my head what I'd do to her.

Pensatucky chuckled deeply to herself and shook her head, "And then Vause getting all pissed too! Man! If only I had a camera for that shit. Just goes to show, don't it?"

"Hmm" Leanne mumbled back. Tucky frowned at her

"Hey what's your problem?" She demanded. Leanne looked up and then quickly looked away again.

"Nothing. It's just... You didn't have to do that. They was only dancin', Tiff. We dance"

"Yeah..but not like them. All nasty and sexual like lesbians"

"It looked like normal dancing to me" Leanne mumbled down at the table, "Like friends. Maybe if you pulled your ass out of your bible now and then.. you'd know the difference"

I blinked at the blonde. She was standing up to the hick? Seriously? I never knew she had it in her.

"Excuse me?!" Pensatucky stood up and walked around to Leanne's table with a dark expression that had the other girl fidgeting, "Leanne I know you didn't just question my actions. 'Cause that'd mean you was disrespectin' me. And you know that ain't how it flies round 'ere" She gave Leanne a second to think about it before she slapped the table impatient, "You know the Lord wants them punished and we are bound to help him see that it's done"

"But what if you're wrong?"

Pensatucky batted her lashes bored, "What?"

"Maybe he doesn't want that. Maybe it's just you who wants it"

"My thoughts exactly" I said cutting off whatever angry self righteous thing Pensatucky was about to scream in Leanne's face. They both looked up at me. Pensatucky with a smug grin and Leanne with a worried look. She knew why I was here and what I was going to do.

"What d'you want Sasquatch? Can't you see this is a private meetin' here" Tucky growled at me.

I crossed my arms over my chest and stood a little tall, intimidating her some.

"I wanna know what your problem is"

"Vause-" I gave Leanne a mean look and she shut up straight away.

"My problem?" Pensatucky repeated with a laugh, "Leanne, this bitch wants to know what my problem is" Leanne's look of warning for her was ignored as the hick turned back to me, "My problem, Lurch, is you high and mighty princesses walking around this prison like your gods fucking gift. You ain't nothing but sick people"

"Says the slutty meth head" I threw back at her. She took a sharp step forward and grabbed my shirt. And I let her. I wanted her to be the one to start a fight. Because fuck did I love ending them.

Her fingers tightened on the fabric of my khaki top and her eyes flickered maddeningly. But she didn't hit me. Instead she smiled sweetly

"You know what? I ain't gonna hit you. I mean, sure I want to. Like, really want to. But.. shits not worth my time" she let me go and turned away.

"What's wrong?" I challenged watching her go, " Pussy?"

She span back around furious and I grinned,

"You know your problem, Doggett? You're all testaments and holy orders but when it comes to the real deal you're just as godless as the rest of us. You won't fight me because you know that I can take you. But you know what, I don't need to hit you. I've got other ways of touching you. Remember"

I twitched my brow at her and smirked. She skipped back a step and I laughed under my breath. Looks like she remembered my threat after all.

"This little vendetta you got against me? Fucking stops now. I am sick of your shit twenty-four-fucking-seven. And taking it out on piper? So not cool. You leave us both alone"

Tucky scowled at me, "No? It isn't? From where I'm standing she deserves it. Just like you do. And I ain't gonna stop because why should I? Because you'll hit me? Try and fuck me with that big lesbian charm of yours? Nah-uh"

"Maybe you should just back off, tiff" Leanne cut in.

I broke off my glaring matching with or Pensatucky to look back at her. She was stood watching us with her arms crossed and a determined look in her eyes. And when she looked back at me I knew she was going to help me.

Pensatucky tysked at her, "Seriously Leanne, what the fuck is going on with you today?"

"I got a mind, tucky. And it says this stuff you're doing just ain't right. Just.. Just leave Vause and chapman alone"

I nodded at her. I knew that took a lot for her to do and I was grateful. She smiled a tiny bit back. I glanced back at the hick beside me. She'd just lost her number one follower and best friend. I was completely ready to gloat in the moment.

Tucky was frowning to herself. She looked between us and widened her eyes in sudden elation

"Oh.. I see!. I get why you're so pissed Leanne. Lurch here's been brainwashing her ain't you?"

I laughed in disbelief, "What?"

Leanne took a step forward, "Tucky-"

"One sec, Leanne. Look here stretch, it's okay. You're bad and we all know it. But dragging Leanne through the mud with you will only pull the great lords wrath on your ass. So just go"

I stared coldly down at her and flicked my glasses on top of my head, "Or what? Will he smite me with his invisible lightning rod?" I asked sarcastically. Her eyes darkened angrily but she got cut off from her retort.

"That's Zeus..." We both rolled our eyes back to Leanne and she shuffled on the spot, embarrassed, "just saying"

Pensatucky walked back to the girl and smacked her in the shoulder, "Well don't just say. That's blasphemy"

"Oh Jesus fuck! What the fuck is wrong with you?!" I snapped prodding her back a step. Her hitting Leanne made me want to make her hurt. I wasn't friends with the wannabe apostle but seeing Pensatucky kick her down ticked me off for some reason. I pushed her away from the other girl and back against the dryers like before. Her face twitched a litte with fear when I leant down and glared at her

"Who the fuck is actually buying you holy shit?" She tilted her head like a confused bitch.

"Buying it? Ain't nobody gotta buy it" she chuckled amused, "The lords way is a free thing"

I groaned. It was hard not hitting her on the spot. She was so stupid and so fucking ignorant. I wanted to hit her for piper and I wanted to hit her for me. Because she was seriously cutting my last nerve.

"You know Vause, I think I know why you're mad" I looked up at her and she smiled, "See, your little girlfriend got all locked up and you can't see her. Maybe if you're lucky she'll get out before her sentence finishes. Not that she'll be worth it after the shu's done with her"

_Yeah, that'll do it._

I raised my fist and made to hit her but Leanne got in my way. She grabbed my arm and pulled me back and told me it wasn't worth it. Behind her tuckys eyes were egging me on.

"Alex, don't!" Leanne begged pushing me back again.

I looked down at her and heard her say something about going to shu if I hit tucky. She wasnt begging for tucky but for me. I sighed out my anger and I took a step back. Behind her tucky laughed.

"Oh man that was lame. You all talk and no beef huh, rich kid. Guess your mama never taught you how to finish the fights you start"

I lunged at her again when she mention my mom but Leanne shoved me back with a mean look. I glared down at her for stopping me. What did she care if tucky got hit? She knew the hick deserved it. Fuck I know most days she wanted to do the punching herself. I told her to get out of my way but she kept blocking me.

"Don't" she warned holding her hands out to put some space between the three of us. Tucky eyed Leanne curiously before she shrugged and slung her arm around the girls neck

"See this Vause? This is friendship. I don't see nobody getting your back"

I scoffed at her, "you honestly think she's doing all this because she's your friend?"

I looked away from the hicks confusion and down at Leanne begging me not to say anything else,

"are you going tell her? Or can I be the one to fuck her little word up?" I asked leaning back and crossing my arms. Leanne fidgeted nervously and bit her lip.

"Tell me what?" Tucky demanded. She smacked Leanne's shoulder, "tell me what Leanne?"

The blonde refused to respond so I did it for her. I was sick of sticking up for her all the time and getting shit. I was sick of letting her think I'd keep her secret safe. Really I was waiting for the moment to hit with it. And sure I felt a little bad because Leanne seemed okay. But she deserved it just as much as pensatucky deserved a hit in the face.

"Your girl here? She's gay tucky"

Silence reached the room around my words and I smiled happy at them. Pensatucky stared back at me and slowly retracted her arm from Leanne's shoulders.

"No.. no. You're lyin'. Leanne ain't no homo"

"Isn't she?" I asked staring at the blonde. She looked close to tears. She was even shaking a little. Tucky tapped her shoulder and Leanne jumped

"Leanne? You gonna tell this bitch the truth?"

Leanne shook her head and sniffed a little before she looked up and glared at me. And with that type of glare? You know you just fucked up big. Leanne let out a little laugh and bumped her elbow into tuckys side

"Look at her tryin' to make us fight. Ain't nothin' gonna help you Vause. Your little bitch ain't comin back from the hill. Maybe you shoulda done like Gina said and leashed her"

Tucky looked relieved by leanne's reply. She smirked at me and I arched a brow at the other girl questioningly. She looked away and told me to get lost already.

"Does tucky know about her, Leanne?" I called when she walked away. She froze to the spot and turned back to us. She had this angry look in her eye that dared me to carry on. Thing is, never could resist a fucking dare

"Your little friend from home, what was her name? Caitlin?"

"The fuck you on now Vause?" Pensatucky sighed resting herself against a table bored.

"You girl there? Fucked a girl. And not just any girl. A fucking preachers daughter" I laughed and waved at Leanne, "can you fucking imagine that? Who knew closet bible bums were so naughty? Maybe you are right. Maybe I'm in the wrong faith system"

I carried on laughing and Pensatucky's expression dropped when she realised I wasn't joking. She looked back uncertain at Leanne, her mouth popping open the second she saw Leanne's guilty expression. I chuckled and reached out to touch the crucifix hanging from tuckys neck, gentle like I had before when I threatened her. She jumped frightened and caught my wrist in her hand, squeezing it in threat. I ignored that though and carried on twirling the gold cross between my fingers.

"Looks like liking girls isn't so bad huh? Because I don't see her burning where she stands" I dropped her necklace and grinned, "You better think about your other friends. I wonder how many of them are actually gay..."

I walked back to the washer where I'd left luescheck's washing grinning to myself. Point and match to Alex. Man I was fucking good at this.

I stood and listened to the two girls' hushed bickering in the corner of the room while I sorted through luescheck's clothing. I couldn't stop smiling and especially not when Pensatucky pushed Leanne away from her and walked out holding her crucifix. Leanne walked to the door and called out after her. Her body trembled a little as she stood there breathing heavy. Then she turned back to me

"What's your problem, Vause?! I was sticking up for you!"

"Really? Because for a second there it looked like you were about to jump and fuck her too" I looked up and smirked at her scowl, "Leanne I did you a favour, okay. You don't need friends like that. She's fucking crazy. And not to be judgemental or nothing but it's starting to rub off"

Leanne stared at me for a couple seconds before she stormed out of the room.

"Hey am I gonna regret saying that?" I teased after her with a grin at my own sarcasm. She didn't reply but I didn't care. She was the least of my worries. My main problem was piper.

I quickly dumped luescheck's laundry into the washers and set them for a deep soak. I ran over plans on how to get piper out of shu while I watched the washer spin. I hated how I couldn't come up with anything that seemed realistic enough to work. It fucking frustrated me. Give me three hours to shift forty thousand dollars worth of heroin with no mules and I could make a plan in two seconds. Throw somebody I cared about in the shu for no reason and I couldnt get a single idea. It was fucking hopeless.

I let out a frustrated breath and climbed on top of a table. I sat cross legged on it and stared at the machine spinning clothes in front of me. Days like these made me wish I was still stuck in the fucking dryer.

"What the fuck am I gonna do?" I whimpered to myself.

* * *

I thought the day had been bad. The night had been worse.

I couldn't sleep. The hard frame of my bed kept me up. Im pretty sure my back wouldn't thank me like o'niel said it would. I just knew I had a day of aching ahead of me. But that wasn't the only thing keeping me awake. I couldn't sleep knowing piper was all alone in the shu. I kept drifting off into nightmares of her screaming out for help. Of seeing her panicked face looking back at me as she got hauled out of the room. I hated it. I hated not knowing if she was okay or not. I needed to know she was keeping it together in there. I needed to know she was fine.

I gave up with sleep after a couple hours and stared up at the ceiling. When that got too much I simply stood up and grabbed my wash things to go shower. It was barely five but I didn't care. The guards could shoot me if they wanted.

"Hey" I glanced up as I passed the bubble and met fischer's kind eyes. I barely managed half a smile back. I paused on the spot and she walked over with a sympathetic look for me

"How you holding up?" She asked. I frowned at her. Why would she ask me that?

"Fine. I'm fine"

Fischer's eyes softened even more, if that was possible, and she nodded at me like she was understanding some deep message hidden in my answer.

"Chapman was your girlfriend, right?" she asked with a smile to say she wasn't bothered if I answered yes. I tried to stop myself rolling my eyes. I was getting so sick of that popular assumption of us.

"Friend actually. And what's this _was_? She's not dead" I huffed irritably.

Fischer looked away embarrassed and apologised. I caught her sleeve when she started to turn away and I gave her my best sorry face

"I'm being a dick. I'm sorry. Im tired. I just.. couldnt sleep knowing she's in there"

"It's okay" she whispered in understanding, "You know Mr Caputo's back today. I'm going to talk with him straight away"

"What happened with Healy?" I asked crossing my arms. She swallowed and looked away from me

"Well he.. He said it wasn't exactly dancing and.. Um.. She was physically-"

I waved at her to stop. I knew exactly the kinds of things Healy probably came up with to justify his homophobic fit of jealousy.

"You don't believe him do you?" I asked hoping she didn't. I needed her on my side here. Otherwise Caputo wouldn't listen. Fischer smiled gently at me and touched my shoulder

"I know his type. Old man, bad marriage, homophobic to hell. Don't worry. He won't get away with this"

I nodded and thanked her. She told me not to worry and I nodded again gratefully before turning to leave the dorm.

"Actually Vause, it's kinda early to be..." She stopped herself and shrugged when I glanced back at her, "You know what, it doesn't matter. Go on"

I managed to give her a tired grateful smile, "Thanks, Fischer"

I walked off to the empty bathroom and stripped off. I put my glasses on the bench opposite the shower stools and ducked inside one to wash. I thought about piper as I cleaned myself. What was she doing right now? Did she sleep at all last night? Was she thinking straight at all? Did she blame me? I'd blame me if I were her. I'd encouraged her to dance with me. I'd let it get too out of hand. And I'd let them drag her off without trying to help her. It was all my fault. All my fucking fault. Like always.

"Fuck!" I smacked the wall with my palm. I struggled to breathe straight while I imagined all the stuff she was going through down there. I'd heard so many fucked up stories. I was terrified I'd lost her down there.

I lost track of time inside my head. Somehow I allowed myself to stand under the water long enough for the wake up alarm to be called. I shut the water off as the room behind me started to crowd with yawning women grumbling about waiting. I wrapped my towel around me and stepped out of the stall, unsurprised when another inmate leapt into it. I let her shove past me and walked back to the benches for my things. I reached down for my glasses but my fingers brushed something sharp edged. I looked down and realised they'd been snapped in half. I slowly picked them up I stared at individual pieces in my hands and swallowed. My mom had got me these when I was in high school. I'd kept them completely safe my entire life. Who'd just snap them in half like that?

"Fuck!"

I heard giggling and looked up. Somebody ran out laughing. I couldn't see their faces. That was just a blur to me. But I fucking recognised their voices. I let out a deeply furious breath as pensatucky and leanne skipped out of the room. I knew I was going to fucking regret messing with Leanne.

I told myself it was too late now. What was done was done. I'd get back at those bitches later. For now I had to go see Caputo and free Piper.

I got dressed and grabbed the rest of my things. All awhile ignoring the women lining up against the wall watching me with looks to say they'd seen it happen but didnt do anything to stop it. But then why would they? Its prison. Nobody cares about anybody here.

I quickly reigned in my anger at everybody and gathered my things. Walking back to the dorm was a nightmare. I had to go slow and use my memory to guide me back. But it still had me bumping into things now and then. God I hated being short sighted. I hated being fucking cursed.

"Need a hand?"

I jumped a little out of fright and looked beside me at the blurry outline of yoga. She looked pretty sorry for me. Her old eyes were practically shining with pity.

"I got it" I mumbled walking off.

"There's no shame accepting help, Vause"

"And I agree. But I honestly am fi-" I got cut off when walking into something hard winded the crap out of me. I must've walked into a wall.

I coughed and stumbled back. Yoga stepped forward to help me balance. Her grip held me stronger than it needed to and she squeezed my arm almost in warning. When I looked up I realised why. It hadn't been a wall I'd walked into. It was a tall grinning moustachioed shit.

"Morning kids! How's daddy's little girls doing today?" We both glared back at Pornstache and he grinned before he looked me over, "You're looking different today specs, no glasses?"

"I thought I'd go without them. See if it made you guards any less repulsive. And it doesn't"

He locked eyes with me and slowly his smile dropped. He reached for his notepad and pen

"That's a shot innmate"

"That's ridiculous!" Yoga cried beside me. I told her to leave it. I didn't care.

"Two shots!" He shouted back

"But she didn't-"

"Three!"

"This is outra-"

"Four..?" He asked her looking up from his writing to throw her a daring grin.

She stuttered a moment before throwing her hands up. He chuckled darkly to himself and slipped his pad back on his belt. His laughter cut off when he looked back at me. He shot me a confused look for my silence.

"Ain't you mad, specs? Old yoda here just got you shot"

I shrugged and he frowned at me like I was mad.

"Can I go now?" I asked pointing back at the hall. He stepped aside and bowed us away.

Yoga told him karma would bite him on the ass soon for what he did to us all in here. He just laughed back at her.

"I'm sorry, Vause" she mumbled moving to walk beside me. She took my wrist and guided me around the halls with a sad face. I rolled my eyes at her.

"It's fine" I told her giving her a reassuring smile, "It's not Tuesday if you haven't been shot for nothing"

"But you could get in trouble with those shots!"

"I'm already in prison. I think getting into more trouble just hasn't got enough of a kick to it after that" I looked back at her and clocked her uncertain expression with a smile. I patted her hand on my arm, "Honestly. Don't sweat it"

She studied me a moment and started steering me towards commissary.

"I'm going to my dorm" I told her confused when she kept tugging me along the hall.

"Let me get you something first" she begged, not stopping until I relented with a nod.

"Is karma that important to you you feel you need to buy me something?" I asked watching her step out of my line of vision and into the blurry fog that led to chang's cage. She came back a couple minutes later and gave me some tape.

"For your glasses" she smiled happily.

I took the roll and thanked her. Maybe if I could fix them I wouldn't have to wait for new ones. And it saved walking around like a clown. Yoga smiled at my thanks and offered to fix my glasses as we walked. I let her have them. She commented on the wear on the arms as she looked them over.

"I've had them a while" I told her, watching her hands slowly and carefully wrap a layer of tape around the snapped bridge. She held them up when she was done and I slipped them on with a sigh when I noticed the glass was cracked in the right lense.

"Don't have any new lenses hidden away do you?" I asked her taking them off to inspect them. It'd work as a tempory fix but I needed new ones for sure. And I couldnt get those being stuck in here. Brilliant.

"Fuck!" I growled angrily. Yoga shook her head at me and patted my shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Vause" she squeezed my arm and walked away, leaving me stood there mourning my glasses.

As I turned towards Caputos office I couldn't help but wonder what else wanted to go wrong today.

* * *

"Hey, Vause, I know you're not working, but can I get my bag?" I nodded at Nicky and wound the last bit of tape around my glasses, "Yeah, just give me a sec" She walked over to me and put her bag on the table. She saw what I was doing and gave me a curious look, "What happened to your glasses?"

I sighed annoyed and held my hands up, "Smashed in the name of Jesus" I said in a hillbilly voice.

"Oh, shit. Pennsatucky?" I nodded and Nicky smirked, "Wow, you guys have released the kraken"

"She's decided it's her Christian duty to annihilate me. Because I'm a "_privileged rich girl_" I scoffed and swiped Nickys tag off the table, "Which is hilarious, because those types of girls tortured me my whole fucking life. If you and I had met in fifth grade, you'd have made fun of my clothes" I pushed my glasses up onto my nose with a sad smile and I looked back at her. Nicky chuckled. I bet I looked stupid. Like one of those dorky girls from those geek movies.

"Who, me?" She grinned shaking her head at me, "No. I would never. You look terrific!"

I took them off and sighed, "Fuck!"

Nicky chuckled as i turned to the cart of bags. I rooted around in it a second and I looked back at her with a smile,

"I know what you were like. Upper West Side, doorman building, skiing in Jackson Hole. Am I wrong?"

She looked at me worried as I handed her bag to her, "Who told you that shit?" She asked taking it off me. Looked like I was right. Like I knew I would be.

"No one. My business was built on sniffing out girls like you and turning 'em into drug mules"

"I knew it"! she said pointing at me, "You're a pimp!"

I grinned, not admitting it nor denying it. In a way I suppose it was true

"Man, you would've been perfect" I told her, "Little Nicky at 19?" I snapped my fingers, "Mmm! I would've turned you out in two seconds"

"I'd make a terrible mule" she argued with an obvious smile, "I would've done all your drugs"

She had a point. But still, life would have been real fun if Nicky had been around for that. And who knows, maybe she wouldn't have been a mule after a while. I might have let her be a friend. We might not even be here. Prison sentences would still be something we laughed about while we travelled. If only life had been kinder.

"Besides," she said waving me back to attention, "Okay, what makes you think I would've fallen for your shit?" I eyed her leaning on a pile of washing before I shrugged at her

"Well, you grew up rich, so you're used to easy money. You have enough stamps in your passport to avoid hate your parents.."

"Yeah, totally" she grinned

"You're in your experimental phase. All you wanna do is fuck a woman or black guy. Have some adventure.."

"Hmm"

I chuckled at her dreamy eyes and finished, "And still be able to afford a Birkin bag" I flashed her a smile and she beamed back at me

"Shit, I'm in!" I laughed and shook my head at her. She had no idea it was harder than that, "Fuck it. You know me. Sign me up!"

We both laughed and I shook my head at her again. I turned back to my glasses and started trying to fix them again while Nicky watched with her smile.

"Oh, was that who Piper was?" She asked after a moment. I looked up at her, all humour gone from me suddenly

"No, no. Piper was different"

Nicky started to slowly smile at me, "Why? 'Cause you loved her?"

"Because she was different"

I gave her a blank look to say I was done talking about it and she took the hint. Nicky let out a heavy sigh of frustration and tapped the table

"Get some glue, pimp" she told me before she turned and left.

I looked miserably down at my glasses and groaned, "Fuck!"

I put them on and left the room. I figured whoever was working would be coming back soon and I did not want to stick around for the bible fun. I wandered out towards the phones and got in line to make a call I seriously didn't want to make. I thought about piper while the line move slowly along. I wondered how she was coping, if she'd slept at all, if she was still sane. It must be terrible down there. It filled me with selfish guilt knowing it was my fault she was down there. I hated it.

"Yo, glasses, you're up!" I looked up at the phones an realised the girl behind me was right. I walked over past the guard and grabbed the phone.

I took a deep breath and punched the number in, hiding the phone tighter in my hand while it dialled through. I half hoped it'd just keep dialling. I was even tempted to hang up and leave it. But the crack on my glass lens made me hold on.

The line picked up and I held my breath before I answered.

"Hey, I need a favour"

She chuckled back at me, "_That's it? No hi, how're you doing? Prison certainly hasn't improved your manners, Alex"_

I rolled my eyes and held the phone tighter, "There wasn't much room for improvement anyway" She chuckled and I smile despite myself, "I really do need a favour though. And, seeing as you are living in my apartment because you're a homeless bum... You kinda owe me"

_"Don't forget you're the reason I got homeless" _I rolled my eyes at her, completely throwing her argument away.

"I'd say it was a mutual problem-"

"_Being your junkie ass blowing off at my landlady" _I stifled my laughter when I remembered that.

"She had it coming!" I argued loudly enough for the co standing guard told me to shut up

"_Ah!_" She laughed making me smile again, "_There's the Alex I know! Okay, so what do you need me to do today, inmate?"_

"Don't call me that" I snapped at her. It was bad enough I'd lost my identity in these walls. I didn't want to lose it on the outside too.

"_Okay.. What do you need me to do today...prisoner?_" I scoffed and rolled my eyes. Why did she always have to push it? "_Hey, tell me something. Is the whole soap dropping thing actually_-" I quickly cut her off there. I wasnt in the mood for her banter today

"Can we not?"

She chuckled again, "You've lost your humour, kid. What's up?"

I let out a long breath and leant against the wall. I thought about telling her but figure she'd gloat. I didn't need her telling me it was my fault. And I definitely couldn't handle we blowing up over piper. Fifteen years had done nothing to calm her down on that front. It still got her mad mentioning it. So I brushed away my need to get it off my chest and shrugged to myself

"Usual shit. Look, I need new glasses"

"_And this concerns me how_?" She asked slowly in a bored voice that told me she was pretty close hanging up. I reigned in my anger at her and forced a calm voice when I replied

"I need you to fill in a few forms for my optician" I told her slowly

"_And what do I get_?" I laughed at her.

"How about I don't kick you out of my apartment?" I flared. She simply chuckled back at me

"_We both know you need me here so the Feds don't search it. That was what the while signing it over to my name was about. Right?"_

I closed my eyes and leant against the wall miserable. I still remembered Fahri telling me to do that.

"I hate it when you get smart" I mumbled in a cracked voice.

_"It was getting smart that saved this place. And I'm sure you're thanking me for it. In your own cynical way"_

"Are you done?"

She laughed to herself and started talking to someone in the background. I frowned at the wall and I was about to ask what was so important it had to waste my phone credit on but I heard a meow and it stopped me.

"Is that a cat?" I asked her.

"_Oh yeah, I meant to say-"_

"When?"

"_Alex i got a cat. There. Said and done"_

"That doesn't make it okay! I don't want some animal shitting over my apartment!"

"_She's far cleaner than most of the ones you brought home before" _I scowled at the wall with the smile in her voice,_ "Besides, I'm living here all on my lonesome looking after your home. I need a friend"_

"Fine keep the fucking thing. Will you help me or not?"

_"I'm still waiting to hear what I get out of it"_

"Are you serious?!" I laughed disbelieving, "You're living in my apartment. I'm paying for all your expenses. And I let you keep your fucking cat. You fucking owe me"

She sighed tiredly back at me, "_Alex, just ask me nicely"_

I blinked, "What?"

"_You always demand things off me. Treat me like an actual human being and not your little slave girl and I might just help you"_

The lady next to me started crying and I tapped my foot impatiently before I decided to let her have it this time. I guess she was right. I was a bit of bitch to her all the time. Still, no way was I about to admit it and apologise.

"Please will you help me, Sylvie?"

"_Was that so hard?"_ She traded. I smiled back

"Very," She chuckled happily and I grinned, "it's good to hear you laugh. I've missed that"

I heard her let out a long breath. Like she had something deep and meaningful to say, "_Alex-" But _I didnt want to hear it.

"I've got to go. I've got to work soon and-"

_"Can I come visit some time?" she asked quickly before i could hang up. It shocked me a little. Why would she want to see me in here? To gloat no doubt. I weighed out my options and decided seeing her wouldnt be so bad. _

"I- uh, yeah. I mean, sure.. I guess.. Why?"

"_Because I'm your friend and I miss you? It's weird being in your apartment without actually seeing you from time to time"_

I smiled despite myself and nodded. I knew how she felt. I used to feel the same about her some time ago. God it felt like forever. But that was slyvie. She was complete opposite of piper. She felt like forever. Piper was always all or nothing in comparison. Maybe thats what had me boomeranging around her.

"I miss you too kid" I smiled sadly and breathed calmly out before adding, "I've got to go. You'll sort that prescription out for me?"

_"I'm leaving right now_" she promised. I heard the jingle of keys and a door opening. She wasn't kidding. I was a little touched really. She called a goodbye to the cat and i let out a sigh. Why'd she need a damn pet?

"What's it's name anyway?" I asked her. I bet it was something stupid.

"_She hasn't got one yet. She's still a baby. I'm struggling to think of one that suits her"_

"Oh the woes of the single mom" I teased

_"Oh shut up. You name her if you think it's so easy"_

I was about to answer with the dumbest name going but I got interrupted by the co, "Inmate! Times up!"

I sighed, "Don't let that cat shit everywhere. I'll talk to you soon" I told her moving the phone piece away from my ear

"Wait Alex!" I heard in her tiny voice. I groaned and brought the phone back up with a quick look at the co

"Yeah?"

She hesitated, "_I- nothing. It can wait"_

"Are you sure?"

"_It's just.. Some guys came by and-"_

"Inmate!"

"One second" I barked back at the guard, "Which guys?" I asked her

"_I don't know. Cartel guys maybe? They mentioned Fahri"_

"What did they-"

The guard growled at me, "Inmate I'm warning you"

"What? Are you going to throw me in a cell to rot? Fucking do it then. I'm turning to have a conversation here" I turned back to the wall for privacy and took a quick breath, "Slyvie you gotta stay away from them. Whatever they say just stay away"

_"But they said-"_

The line went dead. I looked down at the phone and followers the hand that had pressed hang up back to the guard. He looked down at me coldly and held his hand out for the phone. I gripped it tight in my hand and roughly shoved it at his chest as I walked away. I heard him laugh to himself and call the next inmate over.

I was thinking fast as I hurried back to the laundry room. I needed somewhere quiet so I could think. Kubra was after me, that much was obvious. I wasn't sure what he thought he'd get out of scaring Sylvie. Maybe he thought he was sending a message. Maybe because she was living in my apartment he thought she was my girlfriend and he could use it against me. But it didn't seem to add up enough for it to be that clear. I didn't get it. He should just be after me. And possibly piper. Instead now I had another person to worry about. Another life on my guilt.

The washers buzzing loudly called through my thoughts but I ignored it. I didn't care about luescheck's clothes right now. I cared more about slyvies safety and piper being in shu. I had to protect them both but I wasn't all that sure I could anymore. Piper was safe so long as she was in prison. But what could I do to help Sylvie? I had zero contacts now Fahri was dead. Nobody would help me out. Maybe I could give her some money and tell her to run. But then what life was that? Running. I'd been doing it all my life. It wasn't easy.

I let out a stressed breath and stared down at my hands. I felt so weak and out of control when I was useless like this. I was growing so tired of cursing everybody I met.

"Alex Vause" I looked up at the three guards walking to a stop in front of me. They all stood by my table, blocking the way out. I frowned a little and looked back at the guard that had spoken.

"Yeah?"

"You're coming with us" He told me shortly.

He took a step forward and his friends moved too. I pushed myself off the table and retreated a couple steps. He uncrossed his arms so I could read his stitched name tag and stepped forward after me.

"Why?" I asked eyeing them all. Donaldson gave me a blank look back

"You're going to the shu"

I stared at him and jumped away from the fat guard reaching for my wrist.

"What the fuck for?!" I demanded.

"Attempt to insight a prison riot" somebody said for him.

I peered over donaldsons shoulder and watched Healy walk around the corner with a coffee in his hand and a pleasant smile on his face. He took a sip out of his cup and nodded at the guards beside me. They roughly grabbed my arms and hauled me forward towards the door.

"I didn't do shit!" I told them trying to scramble free. That only made them hold me tighter until I was gasping from the pain of it. Healy's eyes twinkled happily when he saw me hurt and he took a step towards me with a light spring in his step.

He looked down at me and sighed,

"You brought this on yourself, Vause. Maybe you should think before speaking next time"

He stepped right up to me and the guards holding me pushed me up so I stood straight. Healy put a hand on my shoulder and gave me this sympathetic look that said he knew how I was feeling. He felt sorry for me. He wished he could help.

"Is there anything you want to say before you go?" He asked meeting my eyes again. I looked back at his green eyes. They were deceptively kind. And glowing almost with his revenge hit on me. But I knew he was still jealous. Maybe that's what he wanted. To lock me away so when piper got out there'd be no distractions for her. Then he could worm his way in again. He was a fucking asinine asshole.

"I can think of a few things" I told him angrily. The guard on my right squeezed my arm again and I winced. I kicked him back for it. Healy was shaking his head at me

"Maybe if you apologised..." He suggested waiting for me to say it. I stared silently back at him, letting him know I wasn't going to say sorry ever.

"It starts with an s" Donaldson told me in a warning growl.

I looked around at all their serious expressions. I almost couldn't believe today was happening. From threats to shu in only nine hours. It had to be a record. I looked up at the ceiling, at the lights. It made me remember being in the dryer. And it made me depressed knowing that was probably going to feel like heaven compared to what was waiting for me down in seg. I laughed to myself and shook my head.

"You've got to be kidding me"


	12. Chapter 12

_**Howdy! Today's song is of course Walking Backwards by The Leagues. For those of you who don't know this was the tune used in the end of the episode. Check out the band guys, they're pretty damn good!**_

* * *

How long had I been down here now? An hour? Two? It felt like a day, maybe longer. Long enough at least to go numb with the boredom of just sitting around waiting. Long enough to let the impatience eat at you. Everybody was right about this place. Time does literally escape you here. And that's so fucked! How can they get away with this? How could they possibly justify locking women up for no valid reason and then taking away any concept of reality too? It was the most illegal thing I'd seen in a while. And in a prison too. I wondered if anybody on the outside knew about this. But then they must do right. The system knows all and fucks all.

Screaming from outside echoed into the cell and shocked me momentarily back into the real world. I tipped my head back and stared up at the white ceiling. There were patches of dirt marking it here and there. Prisoners throwing food no doubt. A strong warning it was shit and I shouldn't eat anything I got offered. Not that I had been yet. Thankfully.

"_You wanna bump?_"

I kept staring upwards until the loudening shouts gave me a headache. I closed my eyes and his voice echoed in my head again, repeating the question. I could see him. In my mind he was wearing the same clothes he'd worn the last time I saw him. Smart waistcoat over a blue shirt and black pants. Expensive Italian shoes. His hair was flecked with grey here and there but his eyes were twinkling with youthful mischief. Like they would if he were still alive. In my head he was stood looking down at me in my cell with that old smile of sympathy he used to save for the rare occasion when I was upset. And just like always he held out his hand with his fingers clasped loosely around the clear capsule of white powder. The only thing Fahri could rely on to fix a problem.

I laughed miserably to myself. None of that would help me now. Just like it couldn't back then. It was just a distraction. A useless pointless waste of a distraction.

"No thanks" I croaked forgetting he wasn't actually there and I was only seeing it in my head.

I winced when i heard my voice. My throat felt completely dry. Nobody had left me water or anything. Just dumped me inside the cell and locked the door shut behind me. They didn't even check up on me to make sure I hadn't escaped or died. They just didn't care about something like that.

_"Smart girl"_

Fahri's voice rebounded around the cell. Back in my head he retracted his hand with an easy smile and put the drugs back into his pocket. It had me looking back at him. I couldn't help but compare this to the first time I ever met him. I wonder if he'd seen this happening back then. I know I didn't.

He crouched down in front of me and then took a seat beside me. I watched him let out a deep sigh as his back pressed the wall. He then turned to me with a hitched smile.

"_When did we fuck up this bad, girl?_" He asked tipping his head back too. I shrugged. I didn't know.

I opened my eyes and tilted my head to look beside me. It should have freaked me out how he was sat there next to me, even when my eyes were open. But for some reason it didn't. I watched him exhaustedly while the sobs built up in my chest again. Seeing him in whatever capacity was both relieving and torturous. I felt so guilty. And I deserved to feel that way. It was my fault he'd been murdered. My fault we got caught out. And all I wanted to do was say sorry to him. But I couldn't. Not for real.

"You're not actually here, are you?" I asked warily instead. I was tired and pretty worn down. I knew he wasn't real because he was dead. But he looked so real too. I wasn't crazy enough yet to think ghost but hey, stranger things had happened.

Fahri smiled to himself at my question and he shrugged back at me

"_How did you get yourself here, Vause?_" He asked waving at the small cell while his voice echoed around it.

I shook my head and closed my eyes again. I breathed deeply out. I was trying to shake him out off my vision. Because I would not go crazy in here. I tried to focus on something else. Something connected to reality. But when I re-opened my eyes all I had were the grey bricks ahead of me. Hardly a comfort or reassurance that I was real anymore.

I held in a whimper and pressed my face into my hands. I was shaking. From the cold of the cell and the chill of the Fahri pressing on my mind. Maybe this was why people went mad in solitary. Too much thinking time.

"Jesus fuck!" I kept sniffing back my tears but I eventually gave in to it when I realised fighting was pointless.

I quietly cried to myself, letting everything hit me all at once just so I could feel something that wasn't this stupid cramped and cold god damned cell. I cried my grief and I cried my anger. And when that was over I cried just for something to do.

I was pretty limp and calm when it was over. Sedated almost. Just without the kick of drugs running through me. It made me wonder why I fought it all the time before. It felt good to cry.

_"I found a maggot"_

My face stung a little when I frowned. It'd been expressionless for so long all the crying had dried it into a blank mask. My eyes lifted open a fraction and I peered around my dirty cell. Did I just hear another voice? For real?

I tried to block out all the screaming from outside and forced myself to listen to the sound of my cell. But I only got silence back. I frowned to myself again, quietly questioning if I was actually going crazy, and decided maybe the voice was just my imagination. I was bored so my mind was making up conversation for me. Like it did with Fahri.

I closed my eyes again and shifted back against the wall. That's when I heard the voice again.

"Hello?" I called a little scared. I was worried it would talk back. And I was worried it wouldn't.

"_Hello?_" The voice repeated back just as surprised.

I blinked and shook myself upright. Was I actually starting to hear more voices?

_"Are you real?_" It asked tiredly. Hopeless even. Like it'd had so many times before when the answer was no.

I shakily stood up and looked around myself. I could hear steady breathing somewhere. Where was it coming from?

"Yeah, I'm real" I told it lightly stepping forward while I searched for its location. I laughed a little to myself at how insane I looked talking to myself.

I asked it back, "What about you?"

_"I don't know"_

My eyes latched on the vent by the right wall while it miserably spoke and I walked over to it. It wasn't a voice. At least not an imaginary one. It was the inmate next door.

I let out a big breath of relief and let myself sag against the wall. Tears of relief blurred my vision and I took my glasses off so I could wipe them away. That's when I realised my neighbor had gone quiet.

I sat myself close to the vent and listened hard. I expected her to talk. To ask me some more questions. But she stayed quiet. And it worried me. Because if Fahri could come and go in my head maybe she wasn't so real. But if she was how long had she been here to think everybody else wasn't real either?

"_I've lost track... I dont know. Nine months. A year"_

I jumped when her husky voice answered my thoughts. That sort of freaked me out. How did she know i wanted to ask? Maybe she wasn't real. But then she started talking again and I realised she was talking to somebody else. I strained my hearing over her talking to try and catch what they said. But it was hard.

"_A year? That's insane"_ I heard a new voice say. I vaguely recognised it but I didn't know where from. My mind felt too heavy and tired to focus on remembering it. But I agreed with her. Everything about this place was insane.

"_They keep the lights on, so you lose all sense of time. __." she_ was telling the other inmate.

I blinked and looked up at the lights. I was trying to imagine being under them for so long, like this woman had. That would seriously mess up your internal clock. No wonder people went mad here.

"_It's not living" _she continued_, "__I mean, yeah, you're breathing, but you ain't a person no more. __It's bad. __You start to see shit that ain't there.__You start to hear voices"_

_"Oh, my God.."_ the other inmate gasped

_"They keep you here till they break you" _

I stared at the wall and thought over what she'd said. Until they break you... How long does that take? And what the fuck happens after? I could hear the immate two doors over talking to herself about being stupid. I felt like telling her to button it. But the cell next to mine remained silent. I wondered if the lady inside had simply accepted her fate here. Maybe thats why she stayed quiet.

"Hey, how often do they check up on us?" I asked the vent, eyes watching the window in the door as a guard walked past outside. She chuckled back

_"They don't check up on us. They think we're all crazy. And crazy is catching. They never open that door save to let you wash. Maybe take you to psych or send you home"_

_"Home?" _The other girl asked. I felt us both straighten up with that idea. The inmate between us chuckled again

_"Up the hill. The clean quiet place"_

"_You mean the prison?"_

"Yeah.." I mumbled deflating again, "The prison"

I tipped my head back and stared up at the lights again. If the prison felt like home after this place I was fucked.

_"Hey, what's your name?"_ The girl asked the middle inmate. I sighed to myself. I didn't want to hear them anymore. I just wanted to be alone with my thoughts. However torturing they might be.

"_My name?"_ The middle Inmate asked confused.

_"Yeah, you know, what do people call you?"_

_"Inmate"_

_"No, your real name. The one you had before the shu"_

The cell beside mine was deadly silent. And I think that gave a massive statement to how crazy you got in here.

"You don't remember do you?" I asked waiting. But I didn't get a reply. She was silent. As was the other inmate next door to her.

I turned away from the vent and pushed myself over to the opposite side of the room. I wanted to be alone. I wanted to be scared on my own. Without their voices and their questions. I just wanted to be alone.

* * *

"Vause?"

I heard a voice talking. A lighter one. Gentler. Kind. But I didn't respond. I didn't want to play with the voices anymore.

"Alex?"

I looked up at the door and blinked when I saw a set of blue eyes looking down at me pityingly. I watched them warily a moment while my head tried to catch itself out of the bored stupor it'd been in for ages. I recognised her.

"Fischer?"

I heard a scratching of metal and the door swung open. I stood up and limped back a couple steps when she stepped into the room.

"You hurt?" She asked watching me hold my right leg off the floor. I looked down at it too and shrugged

"Pins and needles" I said simply forcing my foot to stand on the floor. She smiled at me as if reassured and held her hand out. Her eyes filled with confusion when I just stared at her open palm.

"You're out" she told me waving me over. I blinked at her. Out?

"What?"

"I'm letting you out" she said slowly as she took a cautious step forward. I was searching her expression for any signs of her lying or trying to trick me. And secretly I was trying to figure out if she was real.

I let her come close and when she stretched her hand out to touch mine I realised she was actually here. And she was getting me out.

"Shit," I breathed managing a smile, "I thought I was crazy"

She chuckled back at me, "Not yet Alex"

"How long have I been here?" I asked rubbing my throat when it stung from my question. She frowned at me in concern

"Only a few hours" I stared at her. Was she serious?! "I've been trying to get you out all day. Mr Healy wouldn't hear me out though. He said you belonged here. So I left and-"

"You left?" She nodded, "Just up and left work?"

"I couldn't let you stay here. You or Chapman"

"Is Piper free too?" I asked looking back at the wall when I heard the two inmates talking again.

Fischer followed my gaze and told me no, piper was still here. I turned back to her

"Then why the hell aren't you pulling her out of here too?" I demanded crossing my arms.

I saw Fischer swallow and she gave me that sweet little smile she used on everybody when she was getting beat on. Personally I wasn't in the mood for being patient with her.

"I'm working on it, Alex. Trust me"

I met her pleading eyes and let my stance relax. I watched her breathe with relief when she realised I wasn't mad and she gently took my hand

"C'mon. If we go now you'll get back in time for dinner. I hear red has pulled all the stops tonight"

"Dinner?" She nodded and walked me to the door. I frowned at her back, "what time is it?"

Fischer looked over her shoulder at me and let go of my hand to lift her wrist up. I stared down at the clock sitting nicely against her pale skin and watched the little hand tick around on it. It felt weird seeing time again. Even if I'd only lost a few hours.

"Hey!"

Fischer jumped and span around to the lean guard walking over to her. I could only stare at him. Was that a gun he was holding? And what was with the stab vest?

"What're you doing?" He barked standing toe to toe with Fischer and glaring down at her meanly.

"She's been released" she told him strongly. He laughed back at her

"Ain't nobody gettin' released without my say so. You" his ugly face snapped back to me an he grinned, "get back in your cell!" He shouted raising the gun when I didn't move. I held my hands up and backed up a few steps. Fischer glanced back at me again and I could see her worry a decision before she face forward and poked the guy in the chest.

"She's coming with me. I've got orders from Caputo and Mrs Figueroa to send her back to camp. If you've got a problem with that you should phone up and ask"

I kept the surprise off my face while he chewed it over. I knew she was lying but he obviously couldn't see her hand shaking behind her back. His eyes stared into hers a moment before he stood aside. She coldly thanked him and reached into the cell for my arm

"Cmon inmate" she gruffed yanking me over to her. We walked down the corridor of screaming cells. Her yanking me and me tripping every couple of steps.

"Ow?" I said after she pulled me into the main entrance hall to be processed out. She made sure nobody was at the desk before she turned to me with an apologetic look

"I'm sorry about that. Did I hurt you?" She touched my arm where her hand had previously been tightly latched but I moved it away from her with a hitched smile

"You got to do more than feel me up to hurt me, Fischer" I said jokingly. She smiled and nodded to the door

"Morello is outside with Donaldson. They'll take you to camp"

I laughed, "Will there be s'mores and fire songs?" I asked sarcastically.

She ignored me and opened the door. There was a light breeze that blew in over my skin and drew goosebumps from my arms. I looked outside and had to blink against the daylight. Even though I'd been under a constant light for the last few hours it was nothin on pure sunlight. Everything was too bright after my eyes had gotten used to a fluorescent lighting. Fischer's hand gently touched my back and I took the hint.

I quickly walked out into the cold and up to the van where Donaldson was stood barking at morello to start up already.

"Have fun in prison did we?" He asked grinning. In the drivers seat morello gave him the finger behind his back.

I didn't answer him. I couldn't even give morello a smile. I felt too heavy to muster the strength for either. She cocked her head a little and quickly clambered out of the van to stand beside me. Her hand squeezed my shoulder and she gave me a light smile when I looked back at her. It said I was okay. I'd be alright now. I breathed in and nodded back at her.

"Cmon hon, let's get you back to your books, huh. I kept the others outta your cube while you was away. Ain't none of them books been stolen"

"Nicky doesn't know about this right?" I asked.

Morello shook her head and I managed a smile. I was glad she'd kept the promise I made her take on the way here. She squeezed my arm again and patted the van door. Donaldson gave me a bored look when I simply stared at the empty seats in the back. I really didn't want to go back to the prison.

"You waiting for an invitation?" He growled annoyed. I gave him a mean look back and clambered in.

"Okay!" Morello sang happily as she skipped around the van, "let's go home" she gave me a grin but I was far from returning it. That place was not my home.

Morello started the van and Donaldson hopped in and shut the door. The radio was playing quietly from the front but it sounded too loud to me. She started singing along to a song as she pulled the van around to leave.

"Hey, Vause, I know you're probably not feeling up to it but Nicky's puttin' together a little card game later on for some of the girls. Maybe you wanna go?"

I wasn't listening. Just staring blankly out the window as we drove away from shu. Beside me Donaldson laughed

"I don't think she's gonna be up for playing any games, morello. Looks like a few hours in the icebox has frozen this one up. Hey," he tapped my leg, "What's wrong? Lost all your fight?"

Morello shook her head at him, "She's just tired. Right Vause?"

"Right" I mumbled staring up at the gates that lead to the main prison.

We drove up and around to the main entrance in silence. When morello parked up outside I got pulled out the van by Donaldson. He shoved me to one side and told me he had to do a mandatory pat down before i could go.

"Why?" I asked watching him grow a little red with impatience, "it's not like I can hide anything in the shu"

Donaldson hitched a smile at me and grabbed my arm to turn me around himself. I yanked myself free and crossed my arms tightly over my chest so he couldn't grab them again. He scoffed at me.

"Feisty huh, well I don't like feisty girls. So either you turn your ass around so I can pat you down or I'll drag you back to the shu"

"I don't really think that's incentive enough. Sorry"

"Alex.." I met lornas pleading eyes and let out a breath.

"Fine. I'm going I'm going" I turned round and raised my hands.

I had my palms braced on the white door of the van when a voice called out to Donaldson. He rolled his eyes up annoyed and suddenly he was standing straight, like a soldier at command. I exchanged a look with Lorna before I looked over my shoulder. Fig and Caputo were walking over to us. Fig in a determined and pretty damn sexy strut while Caputo puffed to keep up,

"What the fuck is this?" She demanded pointing at me. Donaldson stuttered a moment

"This inmate was just headed back from the shu" he said.

She frowned at me a second and turned to Caputo

"For what?" She asked him.

He stared back at her cluelessly and she turned round to face him. I watched a smile slide across her lips when he failed to answer her. She cut straight over his stuttering with an evil glint in her eyes

"You do know what for, don't you joe? You're not just letting your officers send inmates down to seg for anything?"

He paled, "I uh.."

"Because that would be illegal and inappropriate" she added smirking when he squirmed under her glare. I wanted to smile really. There was a woman who loved making others crack around her. My kinda gal.

Caputo loosened his tie a little and smiled

"I was not aware of this particular incident. But luckily we caught Donaldson here before he had a chance to-"

She ignored him and turned back to me, "What'd you do?" She sighed bored.

"Nothing" I told her. Donaldson stepped forward

"That's a lie. Mr Healy says she was planning-"

"Healy?" Fig laughed, "For gods sake! Why is every damn shu related thing in this dump connected to Healy?! And I suppose you're gay as well?" She asked me. I nodded and she turned back to Caputo

"I thought I told you to talk to Healy about his fifties attitude to these women?"

Caputo began spluttering again, "I did. I mean, I was-"

Fig rolled her eyes at him and turned her back on his weak excuses. She looked up at the guard beside me and shot him an order

"You, Donaldson, let her go"

I blinked and looked back at the two men. Donaldson looked confused but one nod from Caputo had him telling me to beat it. I glanced back at Lorna. She looked just as shocked as I did. Figs smiled at me and told me I'd be getting some commissary as compensation. I shook my head at her and crossed my arms.

"Then what do you want?" She asked peering back at me apprehensive. I guess she was used to prisoners back talk.

"Another inmate was sent down the hill yesterday, by Healy. And she's still in there"

Figs rolled her eyes, "And what did she do?" she sighed not really listening.

"She was just dancin'" Lorna piped up.

Figs glanced between us and then started walking towards the prison, Caputo on her heels.

"You will get Healy in your office," she was saying as they walked up the slope to the staff door, "you'll tell him the rules and you will make sure he fucking listens this time. Otherwise I will be writing a very nice report to the warden on the exact treatment of the inmates under your care"

"Y-yes. Natalie, I mean. Of course.."

Their chatter died off as the door closed behind them and I shared a smile with morello.

"Did you honestly just avoid goin' back to shu and then get chapman out in one hit?" She laughed in disbelief. I laughed too

"Looks like it"

"Don't make it a habit" Donaldson grumbled walking off towards another guard on the gate. We watched him go with s shared mumble about how much of an asshole he was.

"Well, they may say many things about you in 'ere, Vause," she climbed out of the van and walked around it to hook an arm around my neck, "but I'm pretty sure dirt lucky ain't one of em"

Dirt lucky? I didn't feel all that lucky at all. But she was giving me a happy look and it ft good to have someone glad to see me. So for her sake I brushed of my sarcastic reply and have her a smile in return.

"I'm sure it isn't" I chuckled lightly, walking with her to the prison.

I stopped halfway up the slope and held my hand up,

"Wait hang on, what things do they say?" I peered down at her with a slight smile when she got jumpy.

"Oh you know.. Things. Look I gotta get these keys back to the desk. Catch ya later, Vause"

She quickly shuffled off leaving me stood alone in the yard. It felt weird breathing fresh air. It felt weird feeling it too. I hadn't been in the shu for long but being free of it felt like heaven. I could see now why that Watson girl felt so happy coming out. Shu was the real prison here.

"Yo, specs! Where you been, girl?" I looked back and found Nicky grinning at me, arms full of electrical leads as she lingered behind luescheck to talk to me.

I shrugged back at her, "Around"

Luescheck glanced up from his clipboard to give me a knowing smirk. I guess the guards all knew where I'd been. And he looked ready to tell Nicky. I quickly stopped him though.

"Hey luescheck, I'm almost finished with your laundry" I told him giving him a straight up look that threatened him against spilling to Nicky, "Gotta dry them. Else they shrink from the long soak.."

He blew out a breath and nodded at me. Nicky smiled at him

"Since when were you in such a rush to wear clean clothes?" She teased him. He looked blankly back at her

"Just shut up and walk" he told her. Her expression fell a little at his change in mood. She looked back at me and I gave her a little smile before telling her I had to get back to work. She nodded.

"Hey we're playing poker later. Want in?"

I shook my head, "I'm busy"

"Oh yeah.. I forgot. Tuesday nights you sneak out and go dancing with your pals on the outside" she chuckled to herself but quickly shut up when I failed to respond. She hefted the leads up and took a step closer, "Hey, you okay, vause? You seem down"

I smiled back at her, "I'm fine" I lied. She squinted at me.

"Is this about chapman?" she asked slowly. I shook my head at her

"Its nothing.." Luescheck coughed behind nicky and I pointed over at him, "You should probably get going"

"But-"

"Oh god, Nichols!" Luescheck groaned "You're not getting paid to chat with your friends. Lets go!"

"Yeah? For eleven cents an hour I reckon chatting should be allowed" she snapped back at him. Nicky turned back to me and her eyes were heavy with emotion for some reason, "Hey, you'd tell me if something was up. Right?"

I looked back at her. Would I? Probably not. I nodded anyway and that seemed to relieve her worry. She gave me a smile and walked back to Luescheck. I turned back to the prison while they walked away and let out a long breath.

I looked around at it. It wasn't home. But it was better than shu. And soon piper would be out too. We could talk and forget all about that horrible place. It was that thought alone that gave me strength enough to enter the prison.

* * *

"I'm thankful for my health, for my strong body and mind. And for you girls who remind me every day that self-forgiveness is possible"

Everybody nodded in agreement to Yoga. Some of us even smiled. Poussey tapped the table thoughtful

"I'm thankful that Taystee got the fuck out of this dump"

"Yeah, I'll second that" Nicky said giving the girl a smile. I kept quiet. I didn't even know Taystee had gotten out. Next to her Morello squeezed Poussey's hand.

"I'm thankful for my new bitch, Little Boo" Boo told us walking around the table to sit at the end. She put her tray on the table and point at the floor by the dog

"Sit, hooker!" The dog sat and she grinned, "Good girl!" she put a piece of corn on the floor by the dogs paw and looked around at us with a smile for us, "Oh, and, of course, I'm thankful for all y'all other bitches"

We all chuckled back at her

"Do you wanna say grace, Sister?" Yoga asked politely.

Everybody settled down and closed their eyes for the prayer, even those on the table who didn't believe in god. Nicky rolled her eyes at them and made a gagging gesture at me. I smirked and raised my fork and pretended like I was about to fling some food in her face. I had her grinning back at me and scooping some food onto her own fork.

"I trust in the Lord with all my heart.." The sister was saying. I stopped goofing off to listen, "_and lean not on my own understanding_"

She was looking gently across the table at Bursett who looked back confused. I blinked myself. Her words struck me somehow.

"Amen" the table answered solemnly and dug into their food.

I stared down at my plate. After the shu this looked like heaven. My glasses slipped down my nose a little when i looked down and i shoved them straight with an annoyed frown.

"Man, it sucks to get glasses replaced, you have to get someone on the outside to fill your prescription" I looked up at Nicky and nodded, "How blind are you?"

"Blindish" I mumbled with a sigh. Nicky gave me an encouraging grin.

"Bright side, you can't see the color of these potatoes" Nicky joked. I chuckled but I couldn't help but feel bad.

"It doesn't feel right to be eating while she's in there" I told her sadly. Nicky looked back at me all sympathetic,

"Straight girls" she sighed, "They'll fuck you up every time"

I nodded in agreement and picked at my food. I wasn't hungry. I should be but I couldn't bring myself to eat when piper had to eat that disgusting shu food.

"Hey you okay, vause?" Morello asked tapping her foot against mine. I glanced up at her. She looked worried for me. I nodded.

"Doing okay from..earlier?" She glanced back at Nicky who was watching us both curiously while she ate. I shrugged my shoulders and continued to play with my food. Nicky laughed and shook her head at us

"Man, you two suck at playing subtle. What happened earlier?" She kicked my leg when I didn't respond and I gave her a pissed look. She wouldn't let up though and when she turned to question morello the other girl cracked.

"She went to shu!" she squeaked. Nicky's eyes snapped back to me instantly. She frowned deeply at me like she did when something confused her. I smiled wryly back at her

"What? Don't I look crazy?"

"No. You don't. What did you do?"

"Plot to insight a prison riot" I told her in a rehearsed voice. I'd heard it said enough times when a guard passed my cell and ask the one on guard what I did. Nicky looked back at me like I was mad. Lorna poked her in the arm

"She didn't actually do it" she said coming to my corner. Nicky looked between us and glare suddenly at Lorna

"Why'd you keep it a secret?!" She demanded angrily. I rolled my eyes at her. Why was she taking it personally?

"Nick, it was me. I told her not to tell you"

"But she-"

"It happened okay. I just want to forget I was ever in there"

"Well, did you see chapman while you were there?"

I stared back at her. Was she serious?

"Nicky I got hauled into a tiny fuçking cell. You think I had time to play hide and seek with piper?"

"It was just a question. Jeeze!" She snapped and stabbed her fork through her food. Morello glanced between us and jumped right in.

"Nicky just means, maybe you might have heard something while you were inside. Sometimes the other women are real nice" she said smiling gently

I scoffed, "I don't know what shu you ever went to but all I heard was screaming"

"Horrible ain't it" Nicky sighed. I nodded silently.

"And she's still stuck in there.." I swallowed and hid my shaking fingers under the table. In my head I was replaying my time in my cell. I'd honestly thought I'd been there forever.

Nicky was watching me carefully when I eventually looked back up. She gave me this slight smile and tapped my tray

"You should eat up. I don't know about you but I'm thankful I'm not in that hellhole anymore"

I stared down at my food again. I didn't want to eat.

"Not eating won't get her out"

I glanced up at the nun's soft eyes and i gave her a slight smile to say i knew she was right. I looked down at my food again. I didn't feel like eating at all. I felt a little sick. So i stood up with my tray.

"Hey, you going somewhere?" Lorna asked around her food.

"Im not hungry" i mumbled to them. Nicky watched me with a little smile. Morrello looked worried. I inched around the table and dumped my tray. I couldn't stick around here. I wanted to be alone.

I checked out piper's bunk before I went back to my own. It made me miserable knowing she was still inside the shu. Even though i'd bargained her out hours ago. She should have gotten out instantly if figs ordered it. But she hadn't. And i didn't understand why. If Fischer could break me out without consent, why couldn't piper get out with it? I tried not to think so much about it as i walked back to my bunk. I didn't want to remember what it felt like being in the shu. Because it made me think about piper being in there and that hurt worse than living through it myself.

I entered the dorms and was surprised to find my mattress had been returned. I frowned and glanced down at leanne sat on her bed. She stood up and mumbled a small apology before she brushed past me. She headed out the dorm without any explanation and i watched her go before i turned back to my bed. I checked it over before I pulled some linen and my blanket out of my locker. There was no way i trusted it to be safe when those hicks had had it. Surprisingly though it seemed okay.

Nicky walked into the dorm as I was making the bed. She leant against my cube shuffling some cards in her hands with a cheeky grin. I smiled at her as i unfolded a sheet.

"What?" I asked her taking off my glasses. She waited for me to put them down on the locker before she asked how i was feeling. I didn't reply. I didn't know where to start with how i was feeling. Nicky nodded to herself.

"Still busy?" she asked flicking a card over her thumb to shuffle inside the deck again. I watched her hands a moment and nodded. She blew out a sigh and turned around

"Thats a shame..." she peered around the dorm and called a girl over to her cube. I watched as she walked out to dump the cards in her cube just as the girl walked over. I rolled my eyes when she leant up against the wall and began flirting with her.

I went back to making my bed, eyes completely on my work while my mind raced with other thoughts. Anything to block out nicky's attempt at turning her harmless poker game into a strip tease for herself.

"Holy shit! Chapman, you're out!"

My hands froze on my bed sheet with nickys shout and I immediately straightened up. I almost ran to her when I saw piper. She'd survived the shu. And got out. I grinned at her when she saw me and walked over.

"Oh, my God-" she strode forward and grabbed my wrist, quickly cutting off whatever I'd been about to say. Honestly i couldnt remember. Her touch made me forget.

"Let's get out of here" she told me hauling me out of my cube. I stumbled after her.

"Are you okay?" I asked exchanging a quick look with nicky. The redhead shrugged back at me. She didnt know either.

Piper didn't answer me. Just kept walking. She lead me away from the dorms and down the hall. I had no idea where she was taking me. And not just because she hadn't given me a chance to grab my glasses. Weirdly I didn't care. I was far too busy soaking up the feel of her fingers touching my skin. I worried about her sanity right now but I also loved that she wanted to be alone with me.

Piper opening a door on her left pulled me out of my dazed smile. She walked in and quickly pulled me through it after her. I glanced around for guards as i stumbled through the door. I wasnt all that sure we were allowed anywhere but our dorms right now. She didn't seem all that bothered. In fact, she barely seemed herself at all. Whatever happened in shu it couldn't have been great. But then i'd been there too. I knew exactly what she was feeling right now.

Piper lead me through another room and out near a stage. I blinked when I looked around and realised where we were. The front of the chapel. I glanced back at the door we usually had to use then back at the one we'd come through. Why'd I never use that before?

Piper stopped suddenly and turned back to me. The coloured light from the window shadowed half her face. It made her eyes stand out clearer in the dark. I smiled at her when I realised she was still holding onto my hand real tight.

"What're we doing here?" I asked her.

Piper stared back at me, the blue in her eyes shifting darker.

Then I realised.


	13. Chapter 13

_**Sorry about the wait people! I've been super busy. Also this was pretty hard for me to write for some reason. So if it sucks, my bad. The song today is Worship by Years &amp; Years. Next update may be a while, I've got way too many other stories to fix up first. **_

* * *

Piper's lips crashed into mine, setting off fireworks behind my closed eyes. I felt my breath leave me the second they touched me. Felt my body thrum against hers while it woke up to her. I didn't realise how dead I'd been before until her kiss breathed life back into me. It was the most i'd felt in a very long time. It amazed me really. Years later and I still knew that sharp sweet taste now returning to my tongue. I was still so very very addicted to it.

My surprise melted almost instantly and I immediately moved into her to return her touch, hands holding her tightly to me while I eagerly lapped up her kisses. Her body easily slid into mine. Like a puzzle being put back together. I smiled. We were the worst puzzle around.

Her fingers grazed my neck and I found myself shivering with their familiarity on my skin. Piper felt amazing against me like this. We'd hugged before but man did I miss doing it with her lips touching me too. Every time they brushed me I felt another shot of lightning crackle down my body. Shocking me. Pleasing me. Just waking me up. Every time.

She gasped against my mouth when I licked her lip and I groaned when she refused me entrance into her mouth. Instead she tipped her head back. And that annoyed me, I didn't want to stop touching her lips.

With her breathing heavy in my ear I diverted my kissing to her throat, moving myself tighter into her so I could graze teeth on flesh, making her gasp louder like I wanted. I smirked to myself when her panting echoed my name around the chapel, her nails quickly grafting down the back of my neck. I shivered with their touch and moved my mouth up, eyes opening to see the look on her face as I licked back up her throat.

Pipers fingers slipped down to my waist when I reached her jaw again and she swiftly pulled my shirt up over my head. It took me off guard. Since when was she this controlling? I decided to let it slide and threw my shirt down before I yanked her into me by her pants. I pulled her closer and kissed her harder, trying to be the dominant one. Letting the feverish heat of her body on my bare skin push me into being a little rough. Something I knew she would love. But Piper wouldn't have it. One of her hands pulled on my bra while the other scratched my side so it tingled pleasantly. I was moaning despite myself. I'd missed this. Her touch. Her kiss. Her taste. And I couldn't get enough. Not like this. I wanted more. So much more.

"Take your shirt off" I told her while my hand snuck up it to cup her tit.

Piper's back arched and her hips pressed into my front. I grinned at her when she removed her hand from my back to tug her khaki and vest up. I helped her out and threw the clothing down by our feet. Then I pulled her close again and cupped her face while I kissed her. My left hand followed the contours of her body, fingers enjoying their little walk over her ribs and hip. I knew I should have been a lot more cautious doing all this when a guard could walk in any second. We'd be sent back down the hill if we were caught. But I couldn't. I couldn't concentrate on anything besides piper right now. I didn't want to. I just wanted her.

I started walking her towards the stage where I roughly slammed her back into it hard so she gasped into my mouth. I ate it all up and brought my hand down, drifting it slowly to her pants.

Pipers fingers closed on mine though and she gave me a slight smirk before she spun us round, flipping our positions. I flinched with the pain flicking my spine and my confusion for the situation but piper was quick to distract me from it. Her lips moved across my neck and she grazed her teeth against my raving pulse to get me moaning her name. I gasped sharply to catch my breath back and I watched as my hands fell up her back while she knelt down, taking her soft lips down my chest and stomach. Her eyes avoided mine as she tugged my pants down. I tilted my head and frowned at her. She seemed full of determination to do this quick herself. And I didn't get why. Not when she'd started it.

"Hey pipe-" I cut off quick when she leant in and licked me. My hand slammed back into the stage and I gasped wildly, "Shit!"

My freaking head exploded as she continued to push her tongue back and forth. I bit my lip and tipped my head back to enjoy it.

Fuck prison abstinence! And shit, fuck piper abstinence too! This was fucking amazing!

She chuckled while I continued to bite my lip and I leant back against the stage. I needed it just to hold me up. She was doing so well my legs were shaking a little already from the pleasure. I leant back and focused on the feel of her on me. Memorising every last detail.. Her breath was warm. Her lips teasing. Her fingers dancing up my stomach gave me pleasant shivers. And when she moaned with me, the feel of her voice on my skin, Christ, perfect.

I dug my fingers into her hair and she moaned at their tightness before she let me pull her forward. I struggled to keep a normal breathing pattern as she licked me senseless. I struggled to think too. I'd forgotten how amazing she was at all this, even with her long vacation from girls. It was impressive. But then I had been her tutor. Something I thanked myself for every second she spent making me gasp her name.

As piper continued to suck the gasps and moans from me my head was taking me for a wild trip. I remembered holding her hair like this in brussels. I remembered gasping this sharp in bali. I remembered that smug look in her eye in Turkey. And that curious and hungry look she shot me that said she wanted more? I remembered that in the bar the night I first met her.

I felt Piper's tongue lower some more and I squeezed her hair to stop myself shouting out. I was physically trembling with the effort of keeping quiet and holding on. I felt way too close already and I hated it because I wanted this to drag out. I wanted us to be alone doing this for as long as possible. I wanted her to fuck me forever.

"You gonna cum for me, Vause?" She asked lifting her eyes to my face

I glanced down at her. The color in her eyes was midnight blue and they gleamed with something a little darker than lust. I couldn't think what though. I swallowed when they fixed solely on me and I nodded at her. Piper laughed again, sending tingles all across my body. My hips started to move on their own, moving in time with her tongue. Piper stopped moving then and let me get myself off on her. And fuck me was it good. Too good.

"Shit!" I gasped breathing fast while I came hard into her mouth. My mind was a blur with everything rushing through it. I felt fucking high. Im pretty sure i stopped breathing too. I sucked in a big breath and shuddered when it sent more tingles shooting through me.

Piper was quiet. She kept her mouth moving, gently licking me clean. Her lips rolled upwards and I vaguely felt her kiss my stomach. I still had my hand in her hair, still holding pretty tight. I let go of it and touched her shoulder instead, bracing my hand against it to keep me balanced. I was still trembling from the shock. I hadn't felt that undone in years. I wasn't used to feeling the world tilt away from me all unexpectedly like that anymore. I hadn't experienced it since piper. It was amazing and overwhelming to have it again.

Piper moved away from me while I panted heavily against the rush pulsing through me. She stood up and leant against the stage beside me. We both stared ahead in silence. Both panting heavily. I was just trying to get a hold on everything. I was still very confused about what just happened and I was curious to know what had prompted it.

When I glanced back at her she seemed to be lost in thought. Probably thinking about her stupid boyfriend. I smiled though and took her hand

"That was terrible" I told her chuckling softly when she looked outrageously back at me

"Hey if you didn't-"

"It was the worst, pipes," I told her twisting over to her to kiss her. I groaned at the new taste on her mouth, "you're really bad at that" I whispered to her. I kissed her again and moved away smiling, waiting for her to get it. It took her a moment to remember.

She batted my arm, "You're an asshole" she growled at me.

I chuckled and kissed her jaw

"You're really not into this whole banter thing..are you?" My kisses slowly drifted downwards as I spoke, following the soft glow of her throat.

"I can never tell when you're being serious or sarcastic. The lines always blur with you"

I stopped kissing her neck then and moved back. I looked into her eyes and saw the regret for this already building up in the blue. I let out a frustrated sigh and let her go.

"I should have seen this coming"

"Alex, don't. This... I mean.."

"Was what?" I snapped, "One last fuck before you get hitched?"

"Don't be stupid, I still like you. I still like this" she gave the floor a confused look and I realised she was struggling to know what she wanted. Like usual.

My head got working. If she did this without provocation then she surely wanted it. She'd missed it. And it showed she missed me by the way she dragged me in here. And maybe those eyes weren't about regret for cheating on the boyfriend. Maybe they were for being with him at all. I felt a flicker of hope hit me. If I could make her see how good we were she'd realise I was supposed to be with her.

I took pipers hand cutting off her speech on cheating and I smiled at her while I wrapped her up against me. I felt a tremble move through her when we touched and I smiled as my hand followed it down her back.

"Look, this isn't cheating," I tucked her hair behind her ear and kissed her gently, "this is just letting off some steam. And as for Gary-"

"Larry" she corrected and I ignored her.

"He doesn't need to know"

"Seriously? You think I shouldn't tell him?"

I shrugged and kissed her cheek, letting her mull it over while I continued to kiss down her neck and shoulder. I didnt miss the way her head tilted for me.

"I suppose this isn't a relationship.."

I laughed, "far from it pipes"

"So it doesn't count as an affair" she continued. I moved away and nodded at her.

"Just a frequent- and I mean seriously frequent- string of sexual encounters. We don't even have to hold hands and hug after"

"Ha-ha" she sighed and I felt her head tip forward against my shoulder. I blinked when I realised she wanted to hug. And then I grinned. I was totally right about this.

"Hey, think of it this way" I said wrapping my arms around her waist, "at least if you're my wife in here crazy eyes can't get at you"

"Oh my god you're so right" we both laughed and she moved her head back to smile at me.

"I kinda missed this" she said looking up at me. I nodded and brushed my nose against hers

"Me too kid"

"Think this time could work?" she asked, eyes begging mine a little.

I nodded, "I don't see any drugs around to ruin anything"

"Besides the moment. Well done, Alex" she moved out of my arms and turned away from me. Sulking.

"I was just kidding, piper. It was a joke"

"Not funny"

I walked up behind her and wrapped her against me again. I kissed her ear before I sighed gently into it.

"Honestly this can work. And it's not an affair because this is purely about the contact. Harry would understand"

"Larry! His name is Larry. Jesus you're bad with names"

I chuckled, "Remembered yours, didn't i?"

She looked shrewdly back at me, "So this is not about getting back together?"

"Fuck no!" i confirmed kissing her neck harder a moment to get my anger out, "This is about two people in prison, who need to fuck"

Piper gasped sharply with my hand slipping into her pants and she gripped my other hand squeezing her tit. I grinned into her shoulder and licked up the side of her neck in time with my fingers slipping down between her legs.

"Alex!" She cried when I teased my hand down some more. I smiled at the wet warmth greeting my hand and pushed on to slip a couple fingers inside her. Piper bucked a little and moaned lowly. Her hands squeezed my wrist, nails pinching my skin hard. I pushed a little harder and she all but collapsed against me.

"Shit!" she gasped sharply and bit her lip. She tilted her head back and kissed my cheek gratefully. I grinned and moved back to kiss the back of her neck hungrily.

If she changed her mind after this it wouldn't matter. I wouldn't care.

I was going to make this count.

* * *

"What's your favourite fuck? Like pick one that tops the rest"

I looked down at her rested against my chest. She looked all sleepy eyed and sweet. I kissed her hand and smiled when i thought it over

"My apartment. You'd just seen my books for the first time"

She looked back at me surprised, "why that one?"

"Because, who doesn't like fucking in a library?" Piper laughed and I pulled her up to me so i could kiss her, "still a sexy little bookworm?" i asked around kisses. She shrugged

"I dont know about sexy but the book part is still ongoing"

"Pipes you were and still are the most beautifulest girl I've seen"

"Really?" I nodded and her eyes narrowed doubtfully "in all this time you haven't seen anyone better?"

"I haven't really been looking" I mumbled staring up at the ceiling. Piper went quiet and it helped to embarrass me a little more.

Minutes passed quietly until I felt a pressure touch my shoulder. Her fingers stroked my throat before her hand touched my cheek and tipped my face back to her

"You look beautiful too" she whispered kissing me gently, "and furthermore," her lips moved back and I moaned miserable. She chuckled, "I haven't been looking either"

I frowned at her. She'd meant it as a joke but I was curious to know what she'd done in the years between me and Larry. Had there been someone else? I wanted to ask but at the same time i didnt want to know. Bad enough Larry should exist in her world without me knowing anyone else had too.

"It's almost count time" she sighed in on my thoughts. I glanced back at her as she cuddled closer into me, "I don't want to go" She whined hiding into me.

I smiled and tucked my chin on her head, "I don't want you to go either kid"

Her breath blew on my skin,warming me with sweet tingles that had me smiling. Her fingers drew along the shivers twitching across my body. Softly following them up my side and chest. I closed my eyes to focus on her touch. It wandered lazily up the centre of my chest to the side where her cheek rested. Her weight shifted a little suddenly and my eyes opened to find her hovering over me. She stared down at me. Her eyes searching for something. She smiled at me and lowered herself to slowly kiss me. I couldn't stop myself from grabbing at her, kissing her manically back. She gasped sharply with surprise and she giggled back at me when my hands pulled her tighter against me. I couldn't help myself. I didnt like having any part of me that wasnt touching her.

"What're you doing?" she whispered leaning away from my hand palming down her stomach. I breathed out a laugh and pulled her back to me

"What do you think im doing? Half time is over, pipes"

Piper laughed and gently took my hand away from her again. I pouted miserably up at her. Why was she ruining my fun?

Piper glanced away at the door. The faint call for count outside the chapel explained it all. I sighed. I could feel reality slowly crashing down around us again. It wasnt fair.

Piper squeezed my hand and gave me an apologetic smile. She sat back up and made to stand. I grabbed her wrist and sat up too. She looked back at me. I gave her a sly grin and yanked her back to me. My hand held onto the back of her neck so I could keep her kissing me. I didnt want to let go just yet.

"Ehem" We both jumped. Piper practically leapt off my lap. I held my laugh at her and glanced over my shoulder at the door. Fischer was stood with her back to us, head half turned in our direction to say she'd seen us.

"oh!" piper leapt up and grabbed her shirt off the floor by my hand to cover herself with "Uh, its not what it.. we were just-"

"Pipes, I think its pretty obvious what we were just" I grinned catching my pants when she kicked them at me. She scowled at me and sent fischer a frantic look

"Fischer, we-"

"I didn't see anything" the young guard called taking a quick walk out of the chapel. I smiled after her. Man i loved that kid. Piper was having a panic attack behind me

"Shit! Shit, fuck, shit!"

I chuckled at her, "Pipes, relax"

"Relax?! Alex, you realise she's a guard right?!"

"Was that what that uniform was about? I thought maybe it was just the new prisoner get up" Piper threw me an annoyed look and i rolled my eyes, "Take it easy babe. She's a good person. She doesnt care about this. We're fine, okay?"

I stood up and pulled my shirt on while she hopped into her pants still worrying. I let her panic. I got tired fighting her shit all the time. Piper looked back at me and watched me pull my shirt down. I smirked when she saw my skin disappear under the white cotton. She looked all disappointed. And I loved that.

"How do you know?" she asked still staring at my shirt. I walked over to her and tucked her hair back

"Know what?" i replied pecking her lips. She gave me a glance

"That she's a good person?" She nodded at the door and i laughed when i realised she was asking about fischer. I studied her expression and smirked.

"Jealous?"

She scoffed, "Is that you admitting something is going on between you and fischer?"

Bingo. Piper was jealous. I sighed deeply at her

"I wish. I've always wanted to fuck a guard in prison" Piper smacked me and I laughed, "Im joking pipes. Fischer helped me out with some stuff before. Thats all"

"What stuff?" her eyes had narrowed dangerously. I kept mine locked against hers. I could tell her. I could tell her everything and she'd love me like that. But something made me want to keep it as an ace card. Maybe incase things went wrong. Because they would right. They always did.

"Just stuff" I looked back at the clock on the chapel wall and sighed. Our time was up, "We have to go"

Piper looked ready to cry, "This sucks" she moaned crawling her way into my arms again. I nodded and held her back. It did suck.

"I know what sucks worse" I told her tilting my head to the side to brush my lips across her cheek. Piper leant into me and sighed heavy into me.

"What?" she sulked picking at my shirt.

I grinned and slipped a hand under hers. My head leant against hers and I closed my eyes.

"You" I whispered pressing my lips down over hers.


	14. Chapter 14

_**Hey lookie! I updated without the few months gap! Wooooo! Its a big one today cos I got carried away. But its only a filler. We'll be back to the episodes next update! Today's song is Carousel by Melanie Martinez. Also to the guest reviewer- mind reader much?! **_

**_*new note* Dudes and dudettes! I edited this chapter because I totally fucked up the show chronology! I guess I got too ambitious haha. Anyways hopefully it all works out. Dont forget to review if you like it! _**

* * *

"Cmon, Vause, spill your shit already! You two are fucking!"

I peered back at Nicky when she suddenly exploded at me. I wasn't surprised. She'd been waiting to hear about it for days. She was sat opposite me on a pile of books she had no intention of reading. If Tastee caught her, she was a dead woman. Hey eyes begged mine to tell but I couldn't. I wasn't allowed.

I looked away at my book and pretended I hadn't heard her. She whined at me again, louder.

"Shh!" Another inmate hissed back at her. Nicky told her to piss off back to her reading. She turned back to me waiting.

I didn't say anything, not confirming what she said nor denying it. And that wound Nicky up even more than what telling her all the sordid details would.

"Fucking Christ, Vause! Let a sister in on this, please!" She put her hands together and begged. I laughed and shrugged at her

"Can't help. Sorry"

"But it's totally obvious!" She cried pointing a finger at me, "You haven't stopped grinning to yourself since Wednesday"

The girl on the table over slammed her book and angrily strutted down past us. I tried to give her an apologetic look as she went, I knew how annoying it was having to listen to shit while you were trying to read. She ignored me and even kicked my boot as she passed. I scoffed after her. Bitch.

Nicky was still waiting for an answer when I turned back to my reading.

"Well?" She pressed impatiently.

I just shot her a blank look, "They served waffles for breakfast Wednesday. You know how much I love waffles"

Nicky wasn't buying it at all,

"Yeah, especially when you don't get to eat them" Nicky tapped my boot, "C'mon, Vause. We supposed to share secrets. Prison rules"

I laughed and turned the page in my book,

"Yeah, I think I missed that memo. Sorry" I smiled at her and she frowned hard at me before she gave up,

"Fine" she huffed moodily, "Fine, Don't tell me. Lie all you want"

"Will do" I mumbled distracted while I went back to reading.

I heard Nicky chuckle deeply to herself. She stood up and prodded my knee with the toe of her boot. I looked up and she was grinning all dangerously. I didn't trust it. At all.

"You might be a good liar, Vause. But how about your girlfriend?"

I laughed at her threat

"Piper kept me and our life together a secret for ten years. Good luck finding this imaginary sexcapade story"

Nicky's smile fell and she looked pretty stumped for a second. I got up and dumped my book on the shelf beside us. I wasn't in the mood to read it anymore thanks to her. She watched me quietly, like she knew I had something to say. I took a deep breath and pushed myself out with it.

"Look, nothing is going on between Piper and me. Okay? Nothing"

Man that hurt to say out loud. I refused to react though. I wanted to get Nicky off my case, not help her climb on it. Because I knew she'd come out with the '_I told you so_' bullshit. Or some line about straight girls. I'd already had enough to last me a life time.

"Nothing" she repeated. I nodded earnestly.

"Nothing"

"So when she got out of shu the other day-"

"She'd just got out. She wanted to talk. You know what it's like in the shu" Nicky nodded, "That's all it was"

Her eyes locked thoughtfully onto mine and she leant back against the shelf with a calculating smile. One that screamed she knew I was lying. I simply watched back. I could tell she wasn't done asking about it yet.

"So you're saying.." _Here we g_o, "She didn't drag you off the other day to have some dirty, fun, and completely prohibited, prison sex?"

"That's exactly what I'm saying" I said lips twitching a little despite myself. When she said it like that it made me think about that day in the chapel. Nicky nodded.

"So you weren't hiding together some place getting all up on each other's grill, moaning and shit?"

I shook my head and said , "Nope" but she was on a roll

"And chapman wasn't all like, '_Shit Alex, fuck me like a naughty girl because my boyfriend sucks like a church boy_' and then she's jumping on you and you guys get all.." She added a hand gesture to demonstrate and grinned up at me, "Then she's screaming your name and shit.."

I smirked then and Nicky clapped her hands in triumph

"You smiled! It happened!" She span around and rushed herself out of the library, probably to find Piper and interrogate her. I rolled my eyes at her. I swear most days she was a teen.

"Didn't happen!" I called after her

"Sure it didn't!" I heard her muffled shout call back from the door.

I laughed and shook my head. Fucking Nicky. I felt bad about the grilling Piper was about to get. That's if Morello hadn't already been charged with the job. It had me smiling just imagining the sorts of things Piper would tell them. She could be a great liar but for the most part she sucked. I didn't care much about it though. I wanted people to know. I wasn't ashamed. But she was. And I wasn't so sure it was because of the boyfriend.

I picked up my book again and started reading. Might as well now Nicky was gone. My attention drifted in and out over the pages. My thoughts bounced back to Piper every few seconds, giving me a brand new distraction. I got frustrated pretty quick. I hated this hold she had on me.

"Hey bookworm"

I smiled at her low whisper and looked over my shoulder. Piper was stood there grinning back at me.

"You know I'm starting to think that phrase about the devil is true," I told her turning back to face her, "You always show up when I'm thinking about you"

Her eyes sparkled happily against her smile, "You were thinking about me?"

I nodded and put my book down. I leant forward and braced my arm along the bookcase. She glanced at it and leant against the shelf too, just a fingers stretch away from me.

"What about me?" She asked inching a tiny bit closer.

I eyed the slither of air separating our hands and she smiled at me all sweetly. I slid my hand closer to hers a moment before I picked up the random book sitting under her arm. Her expression dropped with her disappointment and it had me wanting to smile. But I didn't. I wasn't going to make it easy for her. I was nothing if not the top player in our little game.

"I was wondering whether you'd like this" I deadpanned with a half shrug.

Piper took the book off me, fingers grazing my hand as she took it. I shivered despite myself. She was doing it on purpose. Her eyes slowly leaving mine said as much. I did smile then. She knew how to play just as well as I did.

She peered down at the book in interest. I just watched her. Fascinated as usual.

"You wondered if I'd like a book about nazis?" She asked in a frowning voice.

I blinked and looked down at the red book in her hands. I swore to myself. I'd given her the copy of Anne Franks diary I'd been slowly reading through. Man, that was unfortunate.

Piper smiled at me like she knew I'd been faking, "Me, a WASP, wants to read about mass genocide?"

I met her eyes, "You're right. I wasn't thinking,"

My smile dropped a second with my solemn reply before I grinned at her,

"You'd totally love it"

I laughed when she smacked my side with the book and I grabbed her arm to take it off her so she couldn't do it again

"I'll have that" I mumbled pulling on it.

She playfully pulled back before she let me have it. I set it down beside us and I grinned at her. She'd snuck a little closer in our little play fight. We were so close now it was painful. Her skin was practically touching mine. If she moved she'd be pressed right against me. I looked down at her, into those blue eyes that questioned so much when they stared back at me. I felt my heart kick out of my chest when she watched me like that.

"I have a surprise for you" she whispered leaning up to me. I felt my breath catch when it looked she was going to kiss me.

"Yeah?" I surprised myself when I whispered.

She nodded and leaned even closer. Her lips just brushed mine while her eyes watched me amused. I watched back and blindly took her hand in mine whilst I waited,

"What?" I asked growing impatient to taste her again.

Pipers soft laugh blew over my mouth in reply and I shivered at its sweetness. God I wanted to kiss her so bad right now.

"Come on" she grinned walking backwards suddenly.

I let out a frustrated breath when I realised she wasn't going to kiss me. Talk about teasing. She tugged on my hand impatient and I laughed softly before I followed. She backed up to the edge of the aisle and glanced out to look at something. I walked up to her and waited for her to tell me the coast was clear. She didn't though.

Piper smiled and turned back. I jumped a little when she kissed me hard.

"You're playing it a little dangerous today" I gasped at her kissing her quickly back. She moaned softly against my lips and moved away.

"Well.. It's not really dangerous when we're the only people in here"

I felt my smile hitch at her words and I stole a glance around us at the quiet library. She was right. Everybody else was gone. Even Tastee. The library was ours.

I wondered for a second how Piper had managed it. And then I decided I didn't care. She'd started kissing me again while I looked around, her lips chasing her fingers across my cheek and down. I grinned greedily to myself.

Alone with her? I could definitely deal with that.

"That's convenient" I said wrenching myself from the kisses making a very painfully slow progress down the side of my neck. Proud only began to sum up how I felt about being able to make myself move out of them, "You showing up and this place just emptying like that.."

Piper shrugged back at me and curled her fingers around my hair

"What can I say, I'm a mafia gal" I couldn't help but burst into laughter.

Piper smiled innocently back at me, "What?"

I shook my head at her. I couldn't speak. I was too busy laughing still. She didn't seem that bothered but her hand moving from mine said I was in trouble. I felt it press into my side a little hard before she snuck it further down to slip up under my shirt. My laughter cut dead right about the time she stroked a finger across my ribs. I stared down at her. At her mouth while she spoke. I didn't care about what she said. I didn't want to talk anymore. I just wanted to take those fingers away from my chest and put them somewhere a whole lot warmer.

"You know how it is, Al" she was saying. She teased her lips against mine and moved away anytime i tried to initiate a kiss.

"No, _Don Pipe_r" I held the back of her neck and smiled, "Why don't you explain how it is"

Piper laughed softly, "I walk in a room and everybody fucks off. Like a mob boss. You know the drill"

"Well there's only one type of fucking I do" I husked impatiently meeting her lips with mine. She smiled again as I did and I couldn't help but imagine kissing that smile forever.

"Oh yeah?" She asked dragging her hand back out of my shirt. I mourned its loss and kissed her again.

I nodded at her and touched her waist. My hand slid down into her pants a second and then back up and under her shirt. Piper moaned deeply at me.

"Why are you fucking around?" She groaned gracing my lips with her tongue when I laughed at her. I shivered and then flinched. The warmth of her tongue was replaced with her teeth grazing against my lower lip and I suppressed a yelp when she bit down too far. I licked at it when she moved back. I tasted blood. I raised my hand and stared at the red smearing my fingers when I withdrew it from my mouth. I raised an eyebrow at her.

"Ow?" I said wiping my mouth on the back of my hand. Since when did she play so rough? I kinda liked it.

Piper chuckled back at me and moved my hand down so she could kiss me again. Gentler this time. I felt my whole world spin when she licked over my bitten lip and then sucked it. I moaned loudly. That felt way too good.

"Shh!" Piper told me in a whisper when I got loud again, "You're in a library!" she giggled.

"Oh just shut up and let me fuck you already!" I growled tugging at her shirt.

I lifted the hem of it and Piper lifted her arms up so I could rip the fabric over her head. I was simmering impatiently when I saw the white vest underneath it hugging her chest. I wanted her fucking bare beneath my hands.

I started to pull it up too but she stopped me. She looked down at it.

"This I can explain if somebody comes in. Top less I can't" I reluctantly nodded. She was right, "Besides its fucking freezing in here!"

I smiled at her shivering and kissed her, "We'd better warm you up then" I husked taking her hand and pulling her back down the aisle to my spot.

I kissed her against the bookshelf and let her move to stand in front of me. She pushed me up against the back of the shelf next to us and started kissing my neck in the softest of ways. I barely felt it. I hated that. I wanted her to kiss me like she meant it.

I pulled her face back to me and pressed my lips to hers, kissing her gently at first before I pushed my tongue into her mouth. Piper moaned appreciatively at me and held onto my shirt tight so it pinched my skin. I tingled with her touch and pulled her against me. Piper's hands touched my hips after a moment and she pushed me down. I went gladly, sliding down against the shelf to the floor with her following behind to slide easily into my lap. She was smiling at her new position over me. Maybe she thought she was taking lead again.

"Na-ah-ah" I told her pinning her hand against my chest to stop it travelling down. I was going to have the control this time.

Her eyes opened and she looked back at me solemnly. I didn't understand at first but I realised when her fingers stroked me. I looked down at them. My hand was pinning hers against my heart. My heart that was beating pretty quickly under her. She smiled at me and it jumped a little. I rolled my eyes. So much for secrecy.

Piper bent down and kissed me, laughing a little when my heart thrummed against her palm. She was seriously enjoying this. I growled at her and told her to get off already.

"I'm trying" she muttered back sliding her other hand up to my neck. She cupped it gently and kissed me again. I sighed to myself. This was perfection right here.

My right hand moved from her back to her chest. I let my fingertips drag down her exposed skin, digging in a little to make her gasp. I swallowed her breaths and I pushed my hand down further. It snagged on her vest and pulled it down. I ripped my head back and went for her chest, kissing and licking down it. Her free hand moved up into my hair and she clenched it tight while my lips rolled down her chest. I felt her gently pulled on it when I went too far away from her and I smiled as I tipped my face back for her to kiss me. She did it slow. Not teasingly like I'd expected. But just slow. Like she wanted to savour it. It had me smiling again.

"I missed this" I confided stroking her cheek as she continued to kiss me

"Fucking in a library?" She asked making me laugh.

"No.. Kissing you" She moved back and looked down at me, "I missed it"

Her eyes sparkled again and she nodded. Piper's fingers pressed on my stomach, tiptoeing up with her thoughts. I squeezed the hand I still had pinned to my chest and waited for her to tell me. But she never got a chance.

"I-" she cut off when the library door slammed open. A couple voices came laughing in. We both stared at each other.

_"Phewy! I tell ya man that shit is getting ripe!"_

"_That means it's nearly ready, yo!_" Poussey and tastey started laughing. Their voices came closer. Piper held me tighter in her worry.

"_Where'd you say you put those leftovers, T?"_

"_Uh.. Law section. I think_"

_"Right, cos ain't nobody gonna look there ever_" Poussey replied sarcastically, "_You know you lucky all them guards think we too shit stupid to read. Else they be all up in here with their raids_"

Tastee tsked at her,

"_Nobody ever goes down there. Them books got words too long for the bitches in this joint. Just go make your silly drink, fool!"_

Poussey chuckled and her footsteps got dangerously close to where we were sat. Piper cringed away from the aisle and into me. She looked down me when I took advantage of her chest invading my space.

"Alex!" she hissed pushing on my shoulder. I ignored her and carried on running my mouth across her vest to her tit. She moaned lowly when I pulled the vest and her bra out of the way so I could take it in my mouth. I only stopped when I heard footsteps cross the aisle beside ours.

"Shit!" Piper breathed pushing me off her. I just bit back a laugh and pulled her vest straight before I eased her off me.

Piper moved away to crouch by the edge of the shelf and peer around it. I rolled my eyes at her and leant over to the nearest shelf for a book. When she looked back at me it was in disbelief.

"Why're you reading?" She hissed pulling her eyes straight back to the front again.

"Because," I said loudly so Tastee and Poussey could hear. One of them started walking over to us. Piper whacked me and I laughed, "It's a library. We're supposed to be reading"

"Hey" I looked up at Poussey's head swinging round the shelf, "What you two doing in here?"

I let out a hard sigh and slammed the book shut, "Trying to read. But apparently that's impossible even inside a fucking library"

Poussey waved her hands at me and told me to calm down, "Chill out man. You can read, you can read" her eyes glimpsed Piper watching us and she frowned, "Why ain't you wearing a shirt?" She asked frowning down at Piper's vest.

I opened the book up again and ducked my head behind it to hide my smile. I could feel Piper glare my way before she told Poussey she didn't feel like wearing one today.

"You mean that ain't it right over there?" Poussey pointed it out and I choked on a laugh. I rolled it off as a cough and threw Piper a quick smirk. She blushed a little and struggled to come up with an excuse.

"I, uh, got a little hot and took it off..?"

Poussey didn't buy it. I didn't blame her. The radiators were all broke and it was fucking arctic outside. No way could you get hot inside the prison today. She glanced back at me and then walked off shaking her head to herself.

_"White girls doing the doody in a library. Shit man it's too cold for that shit"_

"_Amen!_" Tastee called out. I started laughing to myself when their voices faded to the front again.

"Smooth, Pipes" I told her reaching out for her. She gave me a pissed look back and smacked my hand away.

I ignored her little sulk and snagged the bottom of her vest. I gave her a smirk and yanked her down into my lap again. She yelped and landed awkwardly with a hurt huff. I just smiled and kissed her happy.

"So what was plan B?" I asked squeezing her against me. Piper's pissed mood lasted an extra three seconds before she gave up and relaxed against me. I grinned to myself. I loved winning.

"I'm still figuring that out" she mumbled. She took a deep breath and let it out in a heavy sigh. I took her hand and played with her fingers. She was thinking but not about how we could fuck today. I kissed her hand and came out with it.

"What time is he coming today?"

Piper froze a little in my arms. My question had surprised her. Maybe she believed I couldn't read her as well as I used to. Honestly she shouldn't make it so easy. I saw her look back at me and kept my eyes trained ahead at the wall.

"Eleven" she whispered back.

I peered up at the clock a shelf over and scowled at it. I had barely an hour left with her. I squeezed her closer. I didn't want her to go. Especially not to see that jerk. Ever.

"You okay?" She asked touching my face. I tilted my head round and smiled at her.

"Course" I lied, "Why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know... I'm worried he's gonna know"

I groaned at her. I was getting sick of reassuring her, "For the last time, Piper. Barry isn't superman. He isn't going to tell if you're lying. Which you aren't by the way because this is not an affair. And more importantly it's not going to come up in conversation"

"Superman doesn't have the power to discern lies" I raised a brow at her and she looked away shyly, "Just saying" she mumbled.

I chuckled despite myself. Of all the things she could have said. I'd been betting on another rant about getting his name wrong. I tipped her face back and softly kissed her.

"You're impossible" I told her, kissing her again so she'd hold on to me.

I smiled at the hands picking at my shirt but I gently peeled them away from me so I could scoot out from under her. She was watching me confused as I stood up.

"Where're you going?" She asked. I shrugged back at her. I didn't want to tell her I had a visit today too. I'd kept it a secret knowing she'd pull out of hers if she knew I'd be in the same room as her amazing fiancée.

"Around"

"But we've still got-"

"I've got somewhere to be" I mumbled holding my hand out to her. She took it and I hauled her up. She was looking at me all worried and mistrusting. I kissed her to shut her up.

"I will see you later, Ms Chapman" I told her kissing her again despite myself. I could never get enough, "I expect you to work on that plan B for later" I added smirking. Piper gave a low laugh and nodded at me. But her smile dropped again just as quick.

"What about Larry?" She asked guilty.

"Well, I'm sure he's not my type but if you're that desperate to make this a triangle thing I'm sure he wouldn't-" She batted my arm and I laughed back.

"I'm serious Alex. What if he knows?"

"How would he know?" I threw back impatiently. She chewed her lip and then shrugged, "Exactly. Just chill out and go be the yuppie princess he wants to marry. Shouldn't be too hard for you"

I hated how cold that sounded. Her eyes scrutinised my expression and I expected her to call me out on it but she didn't. Instead she started frowning. Her hand rose to my face and she gently stroked her thumb under my left eye.

"Hey, where'd your glasses go?" She asked.

I shook my head at her with a gentle smile.

"You're not going to believe this"

* * *

Nicky was stood at the window again, leaning heavily against it with her head propped down against her hand as she watched everybody else get a visit. I felt bad for her. She never got one herself. It must suck.

"Alex! Good, I got you before your visit" I turned and Fischer strode over smiling, a package in her hand, "New glasses" she beamed holding the padded envelope out to me. I took it off her and pulled them out. Looked like I had to thank Sylvie. She'd gotten me an exact replica of my old ones.

I smiled at her and unfolded them to put them on. It felt so unbelievably relieving to see everything around me again. I was getting sick of knocking into things. Fischer beamed brightly at me and told me they looked good.

"Thanks," I said nodding at her, "And thank you for the coffee the other day. And for getting me out of shu. And-"

She waved her hand for me to stop, "No problem. You'd do the same" I nodded at her. I honestly would, "Look I gotta get back to the front but if you're around later maybe we could talk. I think I've figured out where we've seen each other before"

I chuckled at her and nodded, "I'd love to. Catch you later"

She smiled and walked around me towards the visitors door. I watched her go and felt that nagging feeling hit me again. I shook it off. I'd figure it out later when I saw her.

I turned back to the visitors window and walked over to nicky

"Hey" I said stopping beside her. She glanced back at me. I waited for her to make some joke about the new glasses but she didn't. She seemed a little sad.

"Hey" she sighed miserably.

"You waiting for somebody?" I asked pointing at the window. Nicky shook her head and turned to give me a smile

"Who'd wanna visit me?" She joked looking me over, "Who you seeing?"

I shrugged, "Just a friend. She's watching my place while I'm in this hellhole"

I glanced back at the visitors room as I said it, eyes seeking Sylvie out among the others. I couldn't see her. My gaze drifted bored at the other visits, over all the happy parents seeing their daughters and the boyfriends visiting their girlfriends. My eyes swivelled away again. I didn't want to see the happy sort of reunion I could never get.

Instead I looked into the corner of the room and landed my attention on a guy sat alone at a table. He was looking around at everybody nervously like he thought somebody might snap his neck if he tried talking to them. He looked like such a loser.

"Can't find her?" Nicky was asking beside me.

I glanced back at her and scanned the room again for Sylvie. But she wasn't there. Maybe she'd rethought her visit and simply mailed my glasses. I wouldn't have blamed her.

"Guess she didn't come" I said sharing an unsurprised look with Nicky. She looked around at them all again and nodded

"Wonder when your little fuck buddy is getting here." she muttered with no wonderment in her voice at all, "Her big boyfriend there looks a little tense. Must be all that sex your stealing away from him, huh"

I peered back at her confused and she smirked and pointed over at the corner of the room. My head snapped round despite me telling myself I didn't care. I guess I just wanted to see the face of the man I was stealing piper back from. My jaw dropped when I realised she meant the loser guy. I looked back at her a couple of times, eyes begging her to be joking. Nicky could only laugh back at me.

"Jesus, what was she thinking?!" I muttered forgetting to keep the thought to myself. Nicky laughed again and tapped my arm.

"Maybe she wasn't?"

I turned and quickly inched around her to the visits door. I waited impatiently for bell to find my visitation details and I gave her a cold look when she let me through. I looked around again when I entered the room. I couldn't see Sylvie anywhere. Maybe she was caught up out front or something. Whatever. I wasn't all that fussed about seeing her.

I looked over a Piper's visit again. Larry was sweating bullets. Seriously, the guy looked that wound up. He kept tapping the table nervous, eyes glazed down at it like he was thinking hard about something. Was it how to tell Piper he couldnt take the whole prison wife thing anymore? I could only hope.

I took a seat by the window diagonal to Larry's table. I sat so I could get a good look at him. He seemed big. Not muscular, just broad. I doubt that guy had ever seen the insides of a gym. He looked far too much like a 'sit at home masturbating over star wars' kinda guy. And from what he was wearing I'd bet fifty bucks he was loaded. Piper always did like them rich.

I forced my attention away from him and stared out the window while I waited for Sylvie to show up. It was weird seeing cars and smiling faces approach the prison. Usually we didn't get to see this side of the building. Not unless we were being dragged out of it to the shu. It was nice, being reminded there was a world outside incarceration. Nice and depressing. It made me want to get out even more.

My thoughts wondered as I waited. They drifted about the room into other people's conversations. I found amusement in overhearing that Daya's guard boyfriend got a visit from the family hard man. And from translating how Florez wanted to know if her boyfriend could sneak her in a new phone. Sophia was arguing with her wife about the meds she'd been taken off. All these conversations. They all seemed to be catch ups. My visits usually tended to flow around drugs and who was out to kill me next. Which im sure was just as fun as being asked how i was doing and finding out what the kardashians were up to now. I let out a long breath. I'd give anything to have somebody talk shit about the outside world at me right now.

A stop in Larry's tapping caught my attention back to his table and I looked back in time to see his expression twist angrilly before he stood up and walked away from the table. I watched nervous as he approached my table. Maybe he knew who i was. Was that why he was angry? He recognised me and knew what was going on? Was piper's paranoia justified? I held my breath and waited.

He seemed to be mumbling under his breath as he took a step to the left to avoid the table. But he over judged it and ended up tripping a little into it anyway. He caught himself and turned to give me a smile. When I glanced down I realised why. Out of reflex i'd grabbed his arm to save him hitting his head on the table edge. I snatched my hands away and made a note to thoroughly wash them later. I didn't want to have him on me when I saw piper again.

"Thanks" He said straightening up, "Sorry for..you know, nearly crashing into you. I never look where Im going. My fiancee could probably-"

"Just watch it next time" I snapped looking out the window. He got the picture and left, making his way quickly out of the room. I frowned after him. Why was he bailing on Piper? Glancing back at Nicky I could see she was just as stumped.

"Alex"

I looked up and found myself looking at Sylvie. She was smiling at me. Like seeing me made her day. I managed a half smile back and rose to hug her.

"Hey"

We broke apart with bells warning and took our seats. Sylvie was still smiling. I kind of wished she'd stop.

"So, what's up?" She asked looking around, "I gotta tell you, I was expecting something way more _Shawshank Redemption_. This is kind of nice. It's totally disappointing"

I chuckled despite myself, "You are way into your movies. Dork"

She grinned back at me, "How're you doing?" She asked.

"I've been better" My eyes drifted back to Piper again, "Thanks for these" I told her tapping my glasses.

"No problem. I had to leave them out front but the girl at the desk said she'd personally make sure you got them. I see she was true to her word. She was pretty hot actually.."

I smirked and turned back to her, "Fischer's gonna have her work cut out with you" I chuckled and took her hand, "Really though, thanks. For the glasses. And for coming. You didn't have to" Sylvie pressed her other hand over mine

"You were holding my living arrangements over my head, Alex. Of course I had to"

She smirked when I shook my head at her. I looked down at our hands and I smiled when I noticed the red scratches covering her skin. It made me feel better knowing that fucking cat was giving her a hard time.

"What'd you call it?" I asked her tapping the scratches when she looked back at me. Sylvie smiled.

"It took a while but I gave her the perfect name"

"Don't tell me it's something disgusting, like Princess, or Ruby"

Sylvie shook her head, "Had to fit her personality and believe me she is no fucking princess"

"So...?" I wasn't all that sure why we were still talking about the fucking cat. But if it stopped me thinking about larry running out on piper..

"She's a little wild but very cute. A total softie if you catch her on a good day. Most of the time she's a vicious bitch"

I laughed. Sounded like it was giving her a hard time, "Yeah, what's it's name?"

Sylvie's lips curled, "Alex"

I rolled my eyes. Of course she'd name it after me. At the front of the room I could hear Bell arguing with an immate about her visitation. i glanced back and felt my heart wrench at the disappointment on pipers face as bell told her to beat it. I felt mad at larry. I didnt like them being together but he shouldnt have bailed on piper like that. I wouldnt have. It made me want to hit the guy.

Sylvie didnt notice my anger. Or she did and thought it was aimed at her. Whatever. I turned my attention back to her when piper turned dejected down the hall and I gave her a bored look.

"You named your fucking cat after me?"

She nodded, "Yep"

I looked her over while she laughed. She looked really tired. Like she hadn't slept. And despite her smile I could tell bad news was headed my way. I sighed at her.

"Come on then, just get it out already"

She stopped smiling and blinked at me, "What?"

"I know that look you're giving me. What's happened?"

Sylvie looked away and I shifted a little nervous in my seat. What would she tell me? Those guys came back? Hurt her? Threatened her? I didn't want her in the middle of all this. She'd had her share of dealing with my life. She didn't deserve to keep dealing with it.

Sylvie took a deep breath and pulled her sleeve back over her right arm. She winced as she did, like it hurt her. I sat up and frowned at her. I watched the thin fabric roll up to her elbow revealing her arm. Her wrist was inflamed and bruised. And in the centre of her forearm was an angry scorch mark that looked pretty fresh. I touched her hand and gently pulled her arm closer to examine. It wasn't a scorch mark.

I felt my blood go cold when I recognised what it was. I looked up at Sylvie. At the tears in her eyes. I stared at her, begging her to confirm my thoughts.

Her voice shook when she told me.

"Kubra paid a visit"

* * *

I spent the rest of the day alone. Nicky had tried to tag along when I left my visit but I quickly shook her off with a made up message from Morello. I went back to my bunk and sat there thinking it all through.

He'd been there, he'd been to my apartment and he'd threatened my friend knowing she'd come visit me eventually. I just didn't understand how. He was supposed to be being extradited from turkey. How the fuck had he managed to come here himself? Maybe Sylvie was wrong. Maybe it hadn't been Kubra. Just a man using his name. I didn't know. And I hated not knowing

But still something wasn't adding up. I remembered the burn on Sylvie's arm, the round ring and the picture burnt into her flesh. I'd seen that design so many times in my life. He'd flashed it off the day he bought it. It was Kubra's family's insignia melded solid onto a thick gold ring. I felt the same anger I'd felt in the visitors room when I'd figured out he'd branded her. Branded her knowing she'd come to me with it. I felt furious and sick. I knew what the warning was. He wanted me to know he didn't care for me anymore. He'd burnt me out of his family. And now he was going to burn me out for real. Just like he had with Fahri.

"Alex?"

I pulled myself out of my thoughts and glanced back at Piper stood outside my cube. She was watching me a little worried. I gave her a brittle smile

"Hey"

She came in and took a seat beside me, her eyes casted over towards the co bubble. I leant back on my palms and let out a deep breath. I felt so incredibly stressed. Piper looked back at me.

"Are you okay?"

I nodded, "How did your visit go?" I deflected

She blew out a breath, "It didnt. Larry didnt show up"

I pretended to look like I cared, "Oh.. Any reason why?"

"I dont know. Maybe he's mad at me" she said miserably.

She looked down at the bed and touched my thigh and I thought about when I'd seen him at visitation. He had looked pretty angry about something. And maybe it had been her. He didn't seem to be in a big rush to see her after all. I felt myself want to smile.

"He probably had something better to do" I said instead reaching for her hand. Her fingers had been glancing mine but she quickly pulled her hand away. She looked back at me again

"Why would you say that?"

"He's a writer" I smiled nudging my shoulder against hers, "He's probably got.. i dont know.. fucking writing a mans column to do"

Piper laughed and shoved me back, "He does not write men's columns!" She cried defensively over my laughter.

I sobered up and stroked her cheek. I gave her a gentle look requesting her to tell me what was on her mind. She turned her face away and stared down at her feet. I watched that worried expression slide back onto her face. I felt helpless when she looked that way. I moved my hand and pressed it on the mattress by her lower back, just gently stroking my fingers against her skin where her shirt had ridden up, hoping it'd soothe her enough to tell me. Because honestly i hated feeling powerless when piper was depressed.

"He told me he got offered a radio slot" she whispered, "He's going to tell everybody about this. Me in prison"

The idea seemed to worry her. She even looked scared. I think I was hating this Larry more by the second.

"It'll be like that article though right?" i reasoned with her. Piper shrugged

"I think radio goes more personal. He's going to be asked questions and he's going to say... everything"

"And you said..?"

"I said I was happy for him" I narrowed my eyes at her dead reply. I knew she didn't mean that at all.

"But?"

Piper turned her head away, "But nothing. I'm happy he's getting recognised"

"Yeah, but for some thing that should be kept completely private. Pipes-"

"I've been thinking" she said cutting me off with a slide of her hand up my leg. She turned back to me with a deep look that made the blue in her eyes a dark ocean. I eyed her smile and felt my own come back to life. I knew that look she was giving me.

"I came up with a plan B" she whispered leaning in close.

Her hand moved a tiny bit higher on my leg, just brushing the inside of it. I had to hold my breath to keep from letting a soft moan escape me. I flitted my attention back to the co bubble before leaning in too. Piper beamed then and took her teasing hand away. She took hold of my wrist instead and stood up, whispering for me to follow. I smiled as I stood up after her.

"Hey stretch, here's a question for ya" I barely heard Nicky. I was busy following those eyes out of my cube.

"Not now, Nichols" I mumbled

Nicky laughed, "Oh sure, you lesbians go enjoy yourselves"

"Still not gay" piper sang as she walked out the room and hauled me after her. I couldn't help but chuckle. The evidence proved otherwise.

"How long are you gonna keep saying that, kid?" I asked. She smiled back at me.

"What, it's true!"

"Sure it is"

Piper bumped my side with her hip and quickened her pace to walk ahead of me. I kept my own and lingered behind with a careful smile when she glanced over her shoulder to make sure I was still following.

I thought about kubra's message while I followed her through the prison. I worried he'd send more. Worse, I worried he'd do something even more dangerous. But as long as I was in prison I was safe. Right?

"Alex" I flinched a tiny bit when a kiss landed on my cheek and Piper laughed, "Jumpy?"

"Just cautious is all" I breezed back looking around. She'd lead me to the Harlem shower stalls. I looked back at her confused

"I'm especially cautious when you lead me into empty bathrooms" I told her folding my arms.

Piper laughed, "Afraid I'll go all _Psycho_ on you?"

"Well you know what they say about dropping the soap"

"I meant killing you"

"You are killing me" I smirked tugging on her shirt so she'd step forward to me.

Piper was grinning when I bent my head down and kissed her. Her lips danced happily across mine, erasing everything away from my mind so she could fill it. A happy distraction I eagerly welcomed.

She slowed our kiss and moved back to lean her head against mine. I smiled at her closed eyes and the way she ran her tongue quickly across her lips as if to taste what mine felt like again. I let out a content sigh and closed my eyes, smiling some more when her nose gently nudged mine.

"Do you ever get that feeling, when you're with someone and the entire rest of the world just falls away? Like everything else just goes quiet and all you can sense is them?"

I opened my eyes and looked down at her. She still had her eyes closed but now she was frowning with her thought, waiting for an answer. I thought about her question. It was simple. So fucking simple.

"I think when you find someone and you're meant to be together you make you're own world. And when you're together you go there because it's so much nicer than the real one you've got to live in without them. That's why everything else is background. Because all you need is them"

Piper looked up at me. Her blue eyes ringed with curiosity and this hue of admiration for what i'd said. I tingled under their watch. I felt embarrassed but I didn't look away. I wanted her to understand why I said that. I wanted her to figure this out.

She started smiling, "You've gotten a little soft in your old age" she teased kissing me. I chuckled back at her teasing and slipped my fingers through hers.

"We're you expecting more blurred sarcasm?"

"Maybe"

"Give me a second. I might think of something"

She laughed back, "Soft and slow. You're definitely improving. You're like good wine"

"Why? Do I intoxicate you?"

"You do a lot to me, Vause" I shivered. I just loved when she dropped her voice like that.

I grinned at her and began backing her up to the shower stalls. She leant away from my lips to pull her shirt over her head with a smile to encourage me to do the rest. I glanced back at the door and I heard her laugh in my ear before her lips tugged on it

"They're all at work. And the guard doesn't walk by for another twenty minutes"

I turned to her, "Well I'm impressed. You really did your research this time"

She nodded, "Hmm-mm"

I smiled down at her and she bit her lip waiting for me to make my move. I groaned a little despite myself and moved down to kiss her. My hands quickly removed her bra and my own shirt before I pulled her flush against me and kissed her hard and desperate. Piper arched herself into me and moaned softly. It had me holding her tighter, hands digging into her skin as if to meld her to me somehow. She gasped at the feel of my fingers scratching slowly down her side and she kissed me wilder for it.

"How about.. I ..kill you... in the stall?" She panted kissing me desperately between words.

I nodded and let her move back to kick the rest of her clothes off while I did the same. She giggled as she took my hand and pulled me into a stall with her. Piper watched me with this low smile that had me aching just right. I leant forward and pressed myself against her with a pleasant shiver at how great her wet skin felt rubbing mine. I kissed her slowly with a smile when it reminded me of another time we'd showered together. Maybe she was thinking the same because her lips tugged on mine to bring me closer, her arms circled my neck, and her body slid deliciously against mine in her impatience. I let my hand fall down, allowing it a brief tour of her before it slid up between her thighs. I breathed a laugh when she moaned into me.

"How about I intoxicate your world beyond sense?" I breathed. Pipers grip on me tightened a fraction and she nodded her permission. As if I needed it.

"Good," I said moving my hand down further to press my palm against her clit. I started rubbing it and she gasped loudly in my ear. I buzzed a little from the power rush and kissed her hungrily for more, "By the time I'm done with you you'll be so drunk on me you'll beg for more" I warned smirking.

"Too late" she whispered kissing me again. I smiled despite myself.

_Too late,_ I mused, _that makes two of us._


	15. Chapter 15

**_Sooooo I realised a little late that my filler chapter has kinda fucked the show chronology and I spent a lot of time figuring out how to fix it to kick the story straight again. My bad but lesson learned. So here we are back to the episodes again. We may dither off into other fillers later on, who knows. Also guys i've been wondering whether to cut this story off at the christmas ep like the show did or to just carry on all the way through. What'd you think? Dont wory, im gonna carry on into season 2&amp;3 but yeah. You wannit in one big story or multiple ones? Somebody lemme know cos god knows I can't decide Dx_**

**_The music choice for today is Another Case by Uh Huh Her. And in response to all you reviewers demanding to know why I haven't had more reviews, I don't know! I'm just as clueless as you! :P Enjoy guys! Also I didnt edit!_**

* * *

_"I wasnt lying when I said it was complicated.."_

_Her eyes watched me carefully, soft blue fixed permanently on me. I swallowed nervous. She was watching me so intensely. I felt if i lied she'd know. Like she'd see the crack it'd make inside me. And then she'd see everything else too. And that fucking scared me. She fucking scared me. _

_I wasnt so sure what this feeling taking me over was. It was too foreign to me. I wanted to tell her everything. Every little secret i knew. Clean and dirty. I'd never wanted that with anyone before._

_I shifted on the spot with nerves and gave her a shy smile,_

_"I dont know all the rules" I told her honestly._

_Pipers eyes looked down and I shivered when they studied me all over. She looked like she really enjoyed what she saw. I really really hoped she did. Because I couldn't handle not seeing her again if she was here to tell me goodbye._

_She glanced up again and my heart drummed a war rhythm in my chest waiting for her to speak._

_"Thats the problem, isn't it" she said slowly looking back at me, "Rules aren't any fun"_

_The music from the bar filled the silence that followed. I felt this magnetic pull again, pushing me towards her. I wanted to kiss her so fucking bad. I wanted to taste everything she had to give. Again. I wanted it all from her. Right now._

_The rest room door opened on my step forward and I caught it in my hand with an impatient look for the girl that saw my expression and quickly inched her way out and around piper. I shut the door and leant back against the wall. I matched her eyes again and waited for her to say something. _

_Piper stood quiet a second before she took a step closer. My skin tingled with her eyes rolling over me. It felt like electric when she looked at me like that._

_"Listen, I don't want to stand in the way of true love. I mean if that is your future wife out there then by all means, tell me to back off" _

_I wanted to laugh, picturing Sylvie as a wife was a gut busting joke. Piper waited for me to speak and when I didn't she carried on,_

_"But you pursued me. And I liked it. I- I've never felt.."_

_I slowly smiled at her, hoping she'd tell me she felt the same as me. Because this connection, this.. this fucking insane hot addictive chemistry I felt around her, it couldn't be one sided. It just couldn't. _

_Piper hesitated a second,_

_"You know, I've never thought of myself as a very sexual person but…Ever since.." _

_She trailed off, maybe she was shy talking about the other night. I waited again for her to speak, giving her the floor because I wasn't so sure what to say if she couldn't. I didn't trust myself not to beg her to stay._

_She was quiet. Just silently watching me back while she tried to decide what to say. I worried what she would say. And what she wouldn't. My heart kept drumming inside my chest, anticipating the rejection, hoping for the acceptance, begging for a chance despite officially not being allowed one. I was both dizzied and intoxicated with the confusion of her. How did she make my whole world tip like this?_

_Piper looked down at my lips and my breath caught a second later when she leaned in. I trembled a little when she didn't kiss me but instead whispered in my ear_

_"I want to taste what you taste like" she husked deeply._

_I closed my eyes and felt myself shudder under the weight of her whisper. It echoed in my head and I had to force myself to remember to breathe. _

_Jesus, what was she doing to me?!_

_She moved back again, eyes set solely on me. She waited for a response but there was only one reasonable one I could give._

_I raised my hand to her neck and gave her a look to warn what i was doing. Leaning in I realised she didn't need it. She wanted this almost as much as I did._

_ I aimed for a gentle kiss. One that said I wanted everything she did. But the second pipers lips touched mine i couldn't help but lose my self control. She tasted perfect. All sweet and soft with a hint of salt and lime cased over the top. She'd been drinking margaritas again. I was smiling a little at the thought of her needing a little Dutch courage to come after me. I felt her breath catch as I licked it off._

_My hand drifted down when she pushed herself into me. All secrecy for her actions thrown aside. It was totally obvious what we both wanted. But we couldn't want it here in the open where Sylvie could walk in again. But I'll be fucked if I had to wait for another chance to have piper again. I needed this. Now. Right now. And I could feel in the heavy handedness of her kiss that she did too._

_Her lips pressed demanding on mine as my hand slipped down her side and reached for the door to the rest room beside us. It wasn't a classy move but my patience was too spread thin by her teasing tongue to care much about it. _

_I moved back as I opened the door and i grabbed her hand to lead her into the room. She grinned and let me pull her in. She brushed herself past me with a giggle and walked backwards to stand by the sink. I almost forgot to shut the door when she beckoned me over with that sexy smirk. Piper hooked her finger at me and I swore to myself as I turned back for the door to slam it shut._

_The lock snapped shut and seconds later her lips were crashing back into mine again. My back slammed into the door with a dull thud and I managed a tiny groan before i pulled her tight against me._

_"I want to taste you, Alex" she rushed pulling my shirt up and pressing her hand down my stomach. She looked down as she tugged my belt loose, looking up only to smirk at me as she knelt, "All of you. Right. Now"_

_"Fuck" I mumbled tipping my head back. She sounded so fucking hot right now. And her fucking eyes were trapping me in. I could feel it. And in that moment I knew I didn't want to be trapped by anybody else. _

_My eyes closed and I settled on listening to my heart beating crazy while she teasedi her mouth across my hip. Her teeth ground against it the same time she undid my zipper and I shook with a sharp breath feeling her mouth move down. _

_Her kisses peppered down my thigh as she slid my jeans down and I felt the warm blow of her breath on my skin before those damn lips stole my mind complet-_

My sweet dreams cut off suddenly when something hard hit me in the stomach. I jerked under my blanket with a hard cough when it winded me.

"Yoo-hoo! Time to wake up, sleeping beauty!" a loud voice called harshly in my ear.

I opened my eyes and blinked around at the women stood over me. Their blurry faces were glaring me down unamused. The dorm was still dark so it confused me why I was being forced awake.

"Morning, beautiful"

I looked up when the voice spoke again and I groaned at Boo. She smiled sweetly and took a step forward crossing her arms threateningly.

My eyes glanced beside her at Gina and Norma and then back at that Andrews girl keeping watch by the edge of the cube. Leanne was up too sat watching everybody with tired curious eyes. When she looked at me her expression twisted annoyed. She was pissed she got woken up too. And her eyes meeting mine said I was going to pay for it.

I sat up and rubbed my eyes tiredly. I wasnt sure what time it was but obviously it was early. Nobody else was awake save the few women grumbling at boo to shut the hell up already.

I sighed to myself and stretched. I paused and jumped mid yawn when something wet touched my elbow. Little Boo panted back at me happily touching her nose to my arm again before she stretched out over my legs. I looked down at her unimpressed. That explained what had winded me.

Big Boo looked pretty pissed when I glanced back at her to demand she get her mutt off me. Guess she'd been expecting her dog to go into killer mode. Instead it was a pathetic puppy. I stroked its head. Anything that fucked Boo off was alright by me.

"Whats this about?" I sighed, twisting out from under the dog and off the bed unwillingly when Boo stepped forward again.

She grinned at me and moved forward to hook her arm around my neck. I wasn't stupid enough to pull her off me. I knew she could probably snap my neck like a twig if she wanted. Boo seemed happy with my compliance and began walking out of my cube, marching me with her. The other three women and the dog followed behind.

"We seem to have a problem we think you can help with" she told me cryptically.

I frowned at her and let my eyes drift into Nicky's bunk as we walked passed it. I was hoping she'd have woken up in the commotion and jump in to help me out. But she wasnt in her bed. In fact her cube was completely empty. And that worried me. I glanced down at Boo,

"What sort of problem?" I asked worrying what that edgy look she gave me was about.

She didn't answer, just frogmarched me through the prison to the cafeteria. I realised I should have seen it coming as we walked around the empty benches to the kitchens. This entire kidnapping had Red written all over it. And sure enough the Russian was leant against the freezers when we walked in. She stared sternly at me and nodded at the others.

Boo's arm tightened on me suddenly while Norma moved to a counter to grab something.

"Hey get off!" I growled trying to push Boo away.

She ignored my flailing about and pushed me down. I landed on a chair with a huff and quickly tried to get up again. Boo let out a sigh and grabbed me by the back of my shirt to haul me back. Gina and Andrews grabbed my arms and held them behind my back.

"Is all that really necessary?" Nicky was muttering watching me worried by the fridge, "You're all treating this like the fucking _Godfather_"

I looked up saw and Red ignore Nicky and walk forward. She flung something over to Boo. A couple seconds later my hands were tied.

I stopped struggling to get free and resigned myself to it. I wouldn't be getting anywhere before they talked. The dog walked round me and flopped down by my feet with a bored huff. I knew how she felt.

My eyes moved up and met Red's again.

"What's this about?" I demanded looking around at the women stood circling the chair.

They all had their arms folded. They all stared down at me silently. Red was directly in front of me. She looked disappointed and furious. It scared me shitless.

"Nobody gonna talk?" I asked sitting back in the chair bored. Five pairs of eyes flickered back to Red before Gina stepped forward with that serious mouse frown of hers.

"We know" she said sternly. I blinked at her. Was I supposed to know what the fuck she meant?

"You know... You know what? That today is Friday? That the jets are going to win the Super Bowl? Or maybe-"

"Vause" I shut up under Red's glare, "We know about the drugs"

My eyes met Nicky's guilty ones before I laughed despite myself, "What drugs?"

"There are girls walking about high as shit out there. Trish is down the hill. And-"

Boo cut over Gina, "And somebody's been supplying them. So Ms big shot importer..." Boo leant down and smiled sweetly at me, "Care to explain yourself? Or am I gonna have to break that pretty face first?"

The dog growled suddenly and everybody looked back at it raising itself to stand between me and Boo. She told the bitch to sit down but it ignored her completely to sit beside me. It licked my hand and I bit the urge to laugh at Boo's loss of backup.

"Well?" She growled at me, shunting the dog aside, "Gonna spill your shit?"

I scoffed at her. I wasn't scared off her at all, "I haven't been dealing" Boo looked at me disbelieving and I glared at her before I looked back at Red, "Do you honestly think I'd risk any freedom I could have left over getting a few girls fixed up? And for what? A candy bar from commissary?"

They all looked back at Red. The Russian may have been swayed by my response but nothing in her expression said so. She was studying me in silence. It made me nervous. If she didn't believe me I was probably about to die. Her old eyes stared at me unblinkingly. I looked away when she refused to.

Boo was frowning, "She kinda has a point" she told them. I rolled my eyes.

"Of course I do!" I snapped irritable. I was annoyed they'd interrupted my sleep for this. Especially when it was obvious it wasn't me doing it. Red studied me some more a moment.

"If it isn't Vause, who is it'?" Gina voiced looking suspiciously around at the others.

I rolled my eyes at their cluelessness. Why were they so fucking stupid? It didn't take a genius to know it was Pornstache!

"Can I just speak from experience here?" I asked shifting in my seat a little.

Boo snorted loudly, "This should be interesting"

"No offence, stretch, but we don't need your help" Gina growled turning her back on me to talk in private with the others. I just looked back at red. I didn't need their permission. I needed hers. She nodded at me.

"Let her speak" she husked.

Nicky was strongly shaking her head at me behind Red, her hazel eyes cutting into mine strongly like she knew what I was going to tell them. I took the hint and coughed before I sat up straighter and launched into it.

"These drugs, I'm assuming it's heroin and minor class pills?" None of them said anything so I guessed I was right, "Based on the look of most of the junkies in here I'll go ahead and also assume they're not loaded enough for the authentic shit. So you're looking for someone whose smart enough to resource the black market gear"

"Wow! Thank you for that really insightful lesson. We really wouldn't have known that. Red, just-" Red silenced Boo and waved me on. She looked fairly interested in what I had to say.

I paused a moment deciding how to play this. If I outed Pornstache they'd kill me for not telling them straight away. Nicky's eyes staring at me said that much. But if I didn't they'd kill me when they did find out I knew. It'd only take one chat with trish to know I knew everything already. So either way I was going to get hit with Red's fury.

"The girls in here, they don't want to get high. Most of them want to get home. Most of them are clean"

"State the obvious" Boo muttered. I rolled my eyes at her. In the corner Norma was tapping on a clipboard for attention.

"What is it Norma?" Red asked squinting at the handwriting.

"Says 'Nicky'" Gina read slowly and everybody looked back at her. I nodded, glad somebody was finally on my wave length. I turned back to Red.

"Think anybody's gonna deal when you've helped them out?"

Nicky stepped forward, "See ma, what'd I tell you"

Red let out a long breath and turned back to Boo, "Let her go. She didn't do it"

I filled with relief. Thank fucking Christ!

"But Red-" Boo stuttered to a silence when the Russian glanced back at her

"One more word Boo and I swear.." She gave the woman a long look of contempt and nodded at me impatiently. Boo was muttering under her breath as she bent to untie me.

"Looks like you got lucky, big shot" Boo breathed down my neck as she untied my hands.

I leant away from her and quickly stood up when I felt her fingers trace back up my wrist.

"A guard is behind it" I shared shaking Boo's breath off my hand. Nicky looked ready thump me one.

"Like a guard would do that" she laughed eyes set nervously on Red.

Red stared off at the walls in thought a second before she swore in Russian. The others fixed their attention on her straight away.

"Fucking asshole!" She snarled viscously. She waved Gina over to her.

The small woman bustled past me and over to reds side, Norma moved to join them too. They started whispering between themselves and I looked awkwardly back at Boo and Andrews.

"You can go now" Gina shooed us out of the dark kitchen before she turned her back on us.

I just scoffed and turned away shaking my head.

"Yeah, you're welcome" I husked at them.

Boo shrugged at me when the trio remained whispering. I just shook my head and started to leave. Nicky practically ran past me in a bid to get outta there. I tried calling out to her to ask what the fuck she was playing at and why I was getting dragged into her shit. But she was already out the gate before I could. I didn't get what her problem was. Why was I getting blamed for the drugs? Did she set me up? Would I have to worry about getting another wake up call from boo and her thugs?

I sighed with my shitty luck and decided to worry about it later. For now I was too tired to care too much.

"Hey, uh, Vause. Um.. I-" I looked beside me at Andrews stuttering and gave her a deep hateful look. She paled a little and mumbled an apology as she brushed past me. I didn't know what she expected from me. I was not gonna be her friend after this shit. No fucking way.

I followed her out and got as far as the front counters when somebody called out my name.

"Hold up!" Gina called me back.

I took a deep breath to calm myself and looked over my shoulder at her. She cautiously approached me knowing I was mad.

"What now?" I snapped moodily, "Wanna blame me for something else?"

She ignored me, "Red wants you to talk to the girls"

I crossed my arms, "No"

"You were a dealer"

"No" I repeated blandly

"You know how to get information"

I felt the anger boil up again, **"Importer**" I said slowly so she'd get it, "I was an **importer**"

Gina watched me blankly, "What's the difference?" She frowned and I rolled my eyes. Oh to be somewhere not surrounded by stupid bitches, "Look, Red said she'd stop starving you if you help.." she let me think about it a second, "I'll write you a list of junkies you can talk to" she told me walking back to red.

I laughed after her. Didn't she hear me?

"I already said no!"

"Whoa baby, no need to shout" I glared at Boo and she smiled, "One thing you gotta understand living here, Red gets what Red wants. So if Red wants you to talk to some girls that's what you do. You've seen what it's like when you don't what she says. And really she's doing you a favour here. You want to eat, she wants them to talk. So just shut up and get on with it. After all, it's just talking. Shit could be worse"

She left with that and Little Boo sniffed my hand before she followed. I hated to admit it but Boo did have a point. Of all the things Red could have done to me making me talk to some ex addicts would be a walk in the park. And if it stopped her starving me out all the time maybe it was worth the pain of talking to some stubborn women.

I clocked the time as I walked around the fencing to the cafeteria, and I swore to myself when I realised the morning alarm was about to go off. Everybody would be getting up for the showers. Which meant long fucking lines. I'd already lost my good sleep I didn't want to miss being able to wash Boo off my skin too. Besides I couldn't afford to be waiting around all morning. I had a meeting with Piper.

I ran out into the hall, slowing myself reluctantly when a guard saw me and barked at me to walk. I got a corridor away from my dorm when the alarm went and women started piling into the hall. I sighed. There went my shower slot.

I was thinking about maybe sneaking into one of the other bathrooms when a hand suddenly snagged mine and pulled me into the supply closet I'd stopped beside. I swung around immediately when the door shut behind us. I was expecting Boo or somebody to be stood there with a new threat from Red. So I pretty much leapt out of my skin when they kissed me.

Hands pressed into my front and slipped up to sweep my hair back away from my face. Lips pushed over mine, filling me with a sweet taste I knew only one person in the entire world owned.

"You are crazy!" I moaned slipping my hands up her back and pulling her closer.

Piper laughed sweetly back at me and nodded. She brushed her fingers along my cheek and smiled at me all innocent when she moved away

"I couldn't sleep much. I was sitting in bed thinking about Thanksgiving and everything and.." she looked up at me and bit her smile, "It made me miss you"

I smirked a little, "Sex dreams kept you up, right?"

She chuckled and brushed her mouth against mine. Her eyes fixed on me before she hushed a sexy little "maybe" my way. I just grinned back at her. I loved knowing I was on her mind.

"D'you wanna get breakfast together?" She asked raising my hand to her mouth. I watched her lips move over my fingertips and I took it back to yank her into me

"Breakfast sounds good" I muttered bending down to kiss her neck feverishly, "I wanna eat out today"

Pipers body rolled up against me and I just about caught her high pitched moan before we were stumbling backwards into an old desk. I pushed her into sitting of the edge of it and kissed her deeply as my fingers pinched the top of her pants. Her tongue was licking my lips trying to push past them into my mouth but I tipped my head away instead and licked my way down her neck, one hand pushing her pants down while the other snuck up her shirt. Piper arched up under my palm rolling up her front and I groaned at the warm feel of her rubbing me good.

My patience for her slipped inside the feel of her warm and ready beneath me. I didn't want to mess about with games anymore. I just wanted to taste her. I gently pushed her back away from me and pulled her pants down. I bent into her and kissed her lips briefly before I rolled my mouth down her neck and shirt.

I crouched in front of her.

And bent my head.

And parted my lips.

And kissed hers.

"Shhhhhit!" She gasp and moaned beneath my eager tongue, begging me for more. And I smirked as I gave it to her.

* * *

I looked back over at the girls while my tray was getting filled. They looked immersed in conversation. And from the way Nicky and morello were smirking at a smiling piper I could guess who they were talking about. I watched the redhead. At the secret worry in her tired eyes. What was going on with her? What had she done and then blamed on me to get Red to threaten me the way she did?

I turned when Nicky started a handsy demonstration and I choked a little on my laughter at Piper's reaction to it. We'd known she wouldn't drop it with her questions. Who would? It was totally obvious we were fucking. I was barely trying to keep it a secret.

"Somebody looks happy today" I looked up and caught Red watching me curiously, "Sweet dreams?" She added smirking slyly. I just shrugged at her. I was still pissed at her but I wasn't letting anything get me down today.

"Maybe I'm looking forward to your pancakes red" I told her smiling when her mouth twitched. It wasn't much but I'm pretty sure red was smiling at me. In her own way.

I took my tray off Norma and thanked them before turning back to the tables. Behind me I heard Gina wonder aloud who I'd fucked to get me this happy. I smirked to myself and walked over to the table where the girls were still grilling Piper for information on us. I rolled my eyes at them.

"Hey Morello," Nicky was saying looking across the table smirking, "You remember when we used to comfort each other?"

The Italian nodded, "Oh sure, you was very comforting"

Piper looked between them and told them again that nothing was going on. I kept my eyes on her back while she spoke. I wasn't really listening to what she said. Didn't need to. Nicky's expression cried bullshit. I decided to sit down when she looked ready to rip into Piper again.

"Hey, guys" I said sitting myself down next to Nicky, "Just barely made breakfast"

"Long shower line?" Nicky asked me in the voice that said she'd known that excuse would be coming. I looked up at her and then away with a pretend frown.

"Yeah, it was really awful today"

Nicky scoffed and stood up, "Your hair's dry" she told me walking off with her tray.

Morello gave us a smirk too before she followed after Nicky. I watched them go before returning my eyes to a smiling Piper. We both laughed at how lame we were with this

"I guess keeping it secret from the prison player wasn't the best idea" I said chuckling down at my tray. Piper sighed.

"I, uh.. I guess not. Although.." I glanced up at her and caught her grinning at me, eyes sparkling. I started smiling back with my heart bouncing

"Yeah?"

"You could have come up with a better excuse for being late. The shower line is such an old cop out"

"And you could come up with a better one?" I teased nudging her with my knee under the table. Her smile widened some more and she sat up a little to tell me. I bent my head forward to listen but she didn't get a chance to speak.

"Yo stretch, I need a word later" I kept my eyes on piper and nodded at Nicky. I felt her breath hit my neck when she leant down to whisper in my ear, "Seriously Vause, it's pretty important. Its about that lame excuse of a kidnap earlier and-"

"I got it" I told her waving her away. I didn't want to think about her shitty problems. Right now I wanted to focus entirely on those blue eyes watching mine.

Nicky mumbled something to herself about lesbians and disappeared again. Piper's eyes followed her out before they returned to me all warm and inviting.

"You were saying" I said taking a sip of my water. Piper blinked at me with a little jump like she'd been caught in a thought. I smiled at her some more.

"What?" she asked genuinely confused. I chuckled at her. She was too fucking cute.

I shook my head at her and tucked into my breakfast instead. Piper watched me all intently before she asked what I'd been doing earlier before her little sex jump. I glanced up at her and swallowed my food. If I told her about the red thing she'd try out her little wac routine, or worse get herself in trouble.

"Nothing, just trying to catch the showers"

Piper bought it and gave me a cute look again, "You wanna catch one after breakfast?" she grinned. My skin tingled at the very thought but I shook my head at her.

"Cant have you going _Psycho_ on me, right?" I teased.

"Well I didn't catch you complaining last time" she threw back with a smug grin. I nodded at her.

"No, you're right. I wasn't complaining. Why was that again?" I looked around thoughtful before I clicked my fingers in elation, "Thats right. You probably didn't hear me complain because it was pretty hard talking with my mouth on your-"

"Anyway!" she rushed looking around to make sure nobody had heard me. I just smirked into my water with a mental high five for myself when she started blushing. I smiled admiringly at her. Fuck I loved it when she blushed like that.

"Hey I was wondering if you wanted to go to the rec room later after breakfast? We can play some games or something"

"You wanna play games with me?" I repeated looking at her all suspiciously. Piper nodded, "Kinda games?" I asked leaning closer in mock intrigue, eyes catching hers as I smiled suggestively. Piper smacked my hand

"Not those types of games" she warned smiling despite herself. I leant back with a laugh and nodded at her.

"Sure. I'm not working today so I'm ready when you are"

Piper beamed at me and tapped my tray, "Brilliant. You finished?"

I looked down at my barely touched food and then read the excitement in her eyes. I guess being hungry could wait.

"Hmm-mm" I said standing up.

We grabbed our trays and dumped them together before walking out of the cafeteria. Piper lead the way into the rec room which was surprisingly empty for once. We looked around and exchanged a nervous look, worrying we werent allowed in here.

"What do you think?" she whispered looking down the hall. I bent down to her ear and kissed it

"I think you're incredibly hot today" I whispered back. She couldn't help but smile.

Piper looked around again before taking my hand and pulling me into the room. I watched her kick the door shut and I grinned when she pulled on my hand. I moved into her and happily kissed her.

"Mm.. how do you taste this great all the time?" she wondered licking at my lips. I laughed and kissed her again, feeling a surge of tingles rinse through me when she pulled me into pushing her against the door.

"It must be this new diet I'm on" i told her kissing her cheek and neck feverishly.

Some inmates outside shouted to each other and Piper pushed on my shoulders to get me to stop. I groaned before I unwillingly took a step back. She readjusted her shirt with a small sorry smile for me. I nodded. I got it.

I moved over to the front table for the games box. It was a pitiful mouldy looking thing. A metaphor for fun in prison. I turned it upside down and checked out our options. Piper walked up behind me, hand moving across my back as she moved to stand beside me.

"Well, we have the fun option of cards or cludo"

Piper weighed out the options with a distasteful frown. I smiled at her thinking and watched her pick the cards up. I grinned but she shook her hand at me.

"No strip games and no black jack. I learnt your tricks in Vegas"

I laughed with the memory of it and I nodded. That was fair enough.

We sat down at a table and she got the deck out and started shuffling them. I watched her hands flick cards at me across the table and I couldn't help but smile at her the entire time. This felt crazy. Like we were together almost. How insane was that?

I raised my card to assess. Secretly I was hoping she'd bail out on her ban onstripping games. I'd just love to win a game of cards and get her naked in front of me at the same time. All in a mornings work.

I watched Piper still shuffling her cards and decided to play a little. I raised the cards to my nose and sniffed them.

"Oh, gosh!" I threw my arm back and looked at her in shock, "Am I crazy or do these cards smell faintly like urine? Smell that"

I shoved the cards under her nose and she squirmed away disgusted. I just laughed and flicked them in front of her, agitating her further.

"Ew! Stop it!" She whined grabbing my wrist "Get it away from my face!"

"What? Is it bringing back memories?"

Piper looked blankly back at me, "What?"

"Fifty Shades of Crazy Eyes!" I grinned waving the cards at her again. She pushed my hand away again

"Stop it" she snapped again. I just smiled and kept waving them at her, childishly winding her up

"Smell it!" I said laughing when she knocked my hand down so the cards were visible, "Why are you trying to look at my cards?" i teased

"Cut it out" she mumbled immediately averting her eyes. I grinned at her

"I know how you play" I told her chuckling, "Don't you look at my cards!"

Piper started smiling at me, "Stop it!" she cried when i tried making her sniff them again, "Cut it out!"

She batted my hand away and pinned it down against the table. I looked down at our hands and grinned happily at how perfect they looked together. Piper smiled and gently took her hands back

"It's weird how normal this feels" she said. I blinked at her. She felt it too?

"What?"

"I feel like I'm 23 and no time has passed"

I could understand that. Some times it felt like the last ten years hadn't happened. It was harder remembering what reality was when she made it seem like yesterday.

"Well, I think that when you have a connection with someone, it never really goes away, you know? You snap back to being important to each other because you still are"

Piper seemed surprised by my reply but she quickly got over it and shook her head at me.

"But I've changed so much since we were together. Haven't you?"

"No. No, not really. I'm pretty consistent" I chuckled picking my cards up again. Piper smiled at me like she hadn't been expecting any other answer.

"Can I ask you something?"

I looked up and smiled, "Yeah"

"Do you think it's odd I haven't heard from Larry since Thanksgiving?"

I rolled my eyes. There went my good mood. Piper didn't notice. Which didn't surprise me.

"You know, maybe he's mad at me that I wasn't able to see him while I was in SHU. But that would be totally fucked up, wouldn't it?"

"I'm not sure you're in the position to feel indignant right now, Piper" I told her shortly. Her expression fell a little.

"Do you think I'm a terrible person?" She asked meekly.

"No! I think that we do what we need to do to survive"

She gave me this look that clearly screamed that she knew just as well as I did that this wasn't survival. Because we could do it without each other. We did before after all. Prison didn't change anything. Because we didn't need. We just wanted.

Piper nodded though and I breathed relieved at avoided an argument over it. She went back to shuffling her cards and I went back to thinking about how fucked everything was.

"Hey!" We both looked up at Poussey striding angrily in with black Cindy behind her, "What the hell you think you're doing?"

"Nothing" piper mumbled avoiding their eyes. Poussey turned back to me

"You. Gimme your shoes"

I blinked back at her

"What?"

Cindy glared me down.

"You deaf or something? Take off your mother fucking shoes!" She barked viscously.

Piper leapt up, "Hey, back off, all right?" She snarled furiously.

Poussey didn't seem as surprised as I was. She stood tall and scoffed

"Oh, you about to step?"

I stood up behind piper and we squared off to the other women ready. The air crackled tensely while they glared at us waiting. I watched them closely for their move, readying myself to yank piper out of the way the second they moved.

Poussey glared at piper an extra moment before she cracked out smiling

"Oh! Your face, yo!" We both relaxed when it was clear they'd been joking. Piper turned back to her seat annoyed, I couldn't help but smile at her.

"You was like "Hey, back off!' You so gangsta" Poussey chuckled with Cindy and high-fived her.

Piper gave them an indignant look. I just smiled. She was too cute. I knocked her leg under the table to get her attention but she refused to look at me. Instead she played with her cards

"All right, inmates. Enough" Bell cut in walking into the room bored, "Save it for the kids"

"What's going on?" Piper asked voicing our joint confusion

"Yo, scared straight in the house, y'all, ya know? I'ma scare us some bad kids"

"I'ma go platinum up on them whippersnappers!" Cindy laughed. Piper exchange another confused look with me. What the fuck were they talking about?

"Yeah!" Flaca strutted in, smirking, "I'm gonna make them shit their little delinquent panties!"

"Hey. Ladies, this is serious" Bell said half heartedly to them, "These kids are going down a bad path. Your jobs are to deter them from making the same mistakes you did"

"But we can make them cry, right?" Poussey asked seriously like it was a deal breaker if she couldn't. Belle nodded.

"Yeah, you can make them cry" Bell relented smiling a little herself. I bet she couldn't wait for the kiddie tears.

"Yeah. I'ma make them cry all right" Poussey said, "Cry like they're going through a haunted house, haunted house called "life"

"I thought you said this was an acting opportunity" crazy eyes cried striding in and straight up to Bell. I scoffed to myself. If she was part of the fun I felt sorry for the kids. Nightmares were probably the nicest thing they were gonna gain from meeting her.

"You want to sign up?" Belle asked us completely ignoring Crazy. I shook my head. I wasn't really feeling the whole kid scare game.

"No, I don't" Piper muttered in agreement with me. Bell didn't look like she cared much about our lack of involvement. She looked down at the clipboard she was holding, beside her Crazy was gearing up to moan again.

"Other prisons get to do Shakespeare and shit. I want to play a role" Crazy Eyes complained, "Like Desdemona, or Ophelia, or Clair Huxtable"

I exchanged a quick glance with Piper and I knew we were thinking the same thing. Who knew Crazy Eyes knew Shakespeare?

"Tell you what" Belle sighed at her like a mother appeasing a child in tantrum, "You can play whatever character you want, so long as that character is the stuff of naughty brats' nightmares"

Crazy looked at her and started grinning that fucking mad grin.

"Yeah... I can do that" She wandered off to the corner and started reciting lines under her breath. I just rolled my eyes. Why bother with the others when you had that to let loose on the kids.

Bell started trying to organise the other inmates but she could barely get a word in over their excited chatter. I threw my cards down annoyed and stood up. Piper looked up at me confused.

"What are you doing?" She asked taking my hand when I held it out to her. I smiled at her and pulled her out of her seat.

"We are getting out of here. Before Crazy gives me nightmares and they give me a headache"

Piper chuckled softly at my reply and squeezed my hand.

We set off out of the room towards the yard. It was freezing outside but at least we'd be alone together. That's all I wanted.

"Fuck me that's cold!" she shivered hiding into my side when the wind blew her hair about. I chuckled and wrapped an arm around her

"Was that an invitation?" I teased kissing her head. Piper tucked herself into me some more and I hissed a little at her pressing her cold body against mine

"Forget that" I mumbled peeling her off me a little, "You're too cold. It'd be like fucking a snowman"

She laughed back at me, "Your loss"

We walked down to the track and started the big loop. A perfect silence settled around us while we walked. Nothing but the sounds of the wind picking leaves off the trees and the odd bird cawing broke the happy peace. I smiled happy to myself. Alone with piper like this made it seem like we weren't in prison. We were just together. And it was perfect.

"You think maybe Larry-"

I groaned at her, "Piper, please! I was enjoying it just being us. Can you not bring the other point of the triangle in?"

She looked up at me, "Alex we can't just pretend he doesn't exist"

"Why not? I think that works fine"

"Because-"

"Because if we did you'd have nothing to boost that insecure ego right?"

She stared at me.

"Is that why you think is going on? I'm stringing him along to make myself feel good? Fuck you"

She threw my arm off her and started to storm off. I thought about letting her. I was tired to hell with her damn complaints about her boyfriend. But I couldn't. Because I fucking loved her too much to see her in pain. I cursed myself and followed after her.

"Piper! Pipes, wait!"

I touched her shoulder and made her stop to face me. I have her a slight smile, "I'm sorry. You know I don't mean it. I'm a dick" she nodded and crossed her arms looking at me to carry on, "I just wanted it to be us for a while. No shitty prison drama and no fiancées. I wanted a little while to just be with you"

Piper studied me a moment. I felt my heart drum nervously in my chest. I didn't want to fight with her. When we fought it broke the illusion that we were together again. I hated the real reality.

Piper blew out a long breath and stepped forward into me. Her arms slipped around me and held me to her tightly. I smiled and kissed her head while I wrapped my arms around her. I still wasn't sure she was okay with me.

"Pipes?"

"I'm sorry I talk about him. I just worry"

I sighed and squeezed her, "It's okay.

"Hey! Lesbians!" I looked up over Piper's head and glared at Pennsatucky strutting down with her cronies. She looked all happy about something and I didn't trust it was a good thing.

Piper squeezed my hand, "Don't"

I nodded at her. I wasn't going to do anything that would get her in trouble. I was patient enough to handle Pennsatucky some other time. Piper stepped away from me and turned to face the newcomers with a bitter expression. I smiled at her. She was still pissed about them breaking my glasses.

"Hey lurch where're your glasses huh? Been watching you crawl around camp like a special trooper. Pathetic ain't it girls?" They all silently nodded. I rolled my eyes

"I thought I'd go without them today" I told her snagging Piper's shirt when she took one angry step forward.

"You ain't got them 'cause I broke 'em. Just like I'ma break you, and you" she pointed at Piper and I felt the anger build up inside me.

"Me? I haven't done anything" Piper said all innocent.

Pensatucky walked up to her all threateningly but I pulled piper behind me and faced her instead. Pensatucky laughed and called around me to Piper

"Lurch ain't gonna be around all the time. You're next blondie"

She and her gang of hillbillies strutted off smug with themselves. Piper scoffed after them. She wasn't scared of them. Neither was I. I just didn't trust that Pennsatucky bitch. I started up thinking ways to get her first. And I smiled with my ideas.

I loved playing long games.


End file.
